EIGHT
M EGAN SAT STUNNED, HER eyes remaining on the door long after Tyler left. When she finally blinked herself back to awareness, she wondered if this was how Chasity felt when Derrick’s overprotectiveness had infuriated her.
Except confusion muddled Megan in a way that she didn’t know if she should be angry or feel cared for. She rubbed her temples, trying to make the brain fog fade so she could concentrate.
She only had two groups today. One right before lunch and one after, but the pile of files of potential parents that Josie had given her sat untouched on her desk.
“An idle mind creates its own problems,” she muttered, her dad’s saying as she pried herself off the couch and moved to sit at her desk. As she opened the first file, Josie barged into the office.
“Oh my goodness, Megan! Are you okay?” Josie rushed over, pulling Megan out of the chair and into her arms. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
Megan sighed, appreciating Josie’s concern and grateful that she had spent her tears with Tyler. Somehow that felt better…a realization that she would have to think on…later.
“I didn’t think it was really anything…” Megan shrugged as she pulled away to return to her seat.
Josie dragged a chair beside her. “How long have the letters been coming? Just here or home as well?”
“Just here. Six weeks,” she said, hating the timidness in her voice.
“I wish you would have said something.” Josie sat back, folding her arms. “You know, it’s not like we don’t have experience with these kinds of situations.”
Megan nodded, remembering the story of Josie’s son and how his birth dad had tried to steal him away the moment they had released him from prison. Thank goodness Wylie found the courage to tell the judge what had happened the night his birth mom died. Now they wouldn’t be releasing his birth dad any time soon.
“We fought hard for our son.” Josie narrowed her eyes. “We will fight hard for you, too.”
“Wylie still have those ropings skills?” Megan laughed, trying to force ease into the situation. “Speaking of fighting for kids…or potential kids. I…” she licked her lips and swallowed. “I want to make sure you know that if Tyler, Krista’s uncle, doesn’t decide on taking custody…I…I am really considering it.”
“Oh, Megan.” Josie squeezed her knee. “Boy, do I know your predicament.”
“You do?” Megan gave Josie her full attention, escaping from the events this morning had brought.
“Well, yeah. I had considered adopting Wylie after the first year he was here, but kept convincing myself he needed more than I could give.”
“Maybe you should talk with Tyler…that’s where he stands.” Megan swallowed, taking a sip of her tea to distract herself from the tears that burned her eyes.
“I had finally decided to do it, filled out the paperwork and everything…then Cody came along.” Josie shrugged, a soft smile gracing her lips.
Megan sat forward, wondering at the parallels between her situation and Josie’s, but surely that only happens once in a small town, and it had already happened twice if she considered Chasity and Derrick. The probability of Tyler, Krista, and herself had of making a made-for-each-other trio like Josie’s and Chasity’s was slim…too good to be true.
“It’s not too good to be true,” Josie said, patting her leg.
Megan’s eyes widened. “How do you do that?”
Josie laughed. “Now, if only I could do it to find out more about this stalker guy.”
“Not much to share, Josie.” Megan went to reach for the letters in the drawer, remembering as she opened it that Tyler had taken them with him. She shut it, pushing down the irritation that flooded her. “Six letters, each one with progressive threats, but the last one…the last one was sent from the post office in Hope County.”
“That’s what Tyler said.” Josie leaned forward, her voice taking on the tone Megan had heard her use on wayward kids. “This is serious. If he’s in the county…” She glanced outside as a truck pulled up.
Megan’s heart hammered until she saw the sheriff emblem on the door; then her blood pulsed for an entirely different reason. If it had been Derrick, she might have faced him directly, but seeing the man who eased in his seat as one of his deputies, she turned back to Josie.
“Do you want me to stay away, Josie? It’s not safe for the kids.” Megan swallowed her desire to throw a fit, demanding her independence and right to continue her work.
“Not until we know it's a threat for sure. Now that Derrick knows, they’ll be on the lookout for strangers.”
“In a tourist town?” Megan raised her eyebrows.
“Well, suspicious strangers. They have a look.”
“Not all of them.” Megan once again faded from the world to run through her mental store of patients that showed signs of psychotic behavior like this. “Sometimes they seem perfectly normal.” And those were the scary ones.
“Do you have an idea of who it could be?”
“I’ve been running through a list of potentials in my mind, but I don’t have a firm idea…” Megan shot out of her seat. “Unless…unless I can match the handwriting.”
She opened the drawer with her purse, grabbed it, and pulled the strap over her shoulder. “Josie, I…” The sound of kids laughing hit her in the pit of her stomach, and she saw her first group skipping towards her. She set her purse down, turning back toward Josie. “Please tell the deputy that I need to talk to Derrick, with the letters, at my house, but not until after two.”
“Megan, this is important. I’ll take over the group.”
Megan shook her head. “No. These kids need the comfort that consistency brings. It won’t hurt to wait another few hours.”
Josie eyed her before rising to a stand with a sigh. “If you say so, but all you’ve got to do is call, and I’ll take over.”
“I appreciate that.” Megan stuffed her purse back into her desk and busied herself putting out the throw pillows and beanbag chairs.
“I’ll let Tony, the deputy, know.” Josie switched her look of concern to a beaming smile as the kids came funneling in. “Hey, guys! How’s everyone doing today?”
They all answered at once, then one kid asked, “Are you joining us today, Miss Josie?”
“Not today, Caleb, but maybe another time.”
“You gonna go talk to that cop?” a little girl asked with wide eyes.
“I am. He’s a friend.”
“So he’s not here to take one of us to jail?” another little boy asked.
“No.” Josie laughed. “Why would you think that? Every kid here is a good kid.”
“Told ya.” The boy smirked and folded his arms across his skinny chest.
“Say goodbye to Miss Josie, everyone,” Megan said, gathering them in and motioning to the seats she had laid out. “Let’s all have a seat and take in some deep breaths.”
Megan positioned herself so she couldn’t see Josie and the deputy talking. She needed to give these kids her full attention. They had so many questions and concerns about finding a forever home. In this moment, they needed her, and if she allowed herself to think about it, she needed them too.
She didn’t let herself think about the letters until she had left the camp’s boundary on her way home. Even then she focused more on the logistics, such as where did she put those boxes of files? She had almost shredded them, but she worried about lawsuits and wanted to ensure she had all she needed.
When she had moved to Hope Lake, she let her apartment go, the last scrap of attachment to the big city. The movers had been efficient and had even stacked those boxes of files into her attic for her. How in the world was she going to get them down?
When she arrived at her house, Derrick’s sheriff cruiser and Tyler’s truck were parked in front. Pulling into her driveway, she saw them talking to her neighbor, Mrs. Fields, and groaned. Her business would be all over Hope Lake by the end of the day.
Slamming her car door a little harder than she meant to, she stalked straight up the sidewalk to her porch, ignoring the expectant stares from the guys as she unlocked the door. She left it ajar, though, and went in to put down her purse and calm herself with a drink of water.
“Knock, knock?” Derrick said, and she heard her door squeak as he pushed it all the way open.
“Come on in,” she said, drawing in deep breaths and telling herself to be nice. They were only helping after all, because they cared, right?
“You asked us to be here, right?” Derrick said as they walked into her kitchen area.
She glared at Tyler, then relaxed her gaze as she fixed it on Derrick.
“Yes, thank you. I’m just…I’m not myself right now.”
“Not sure how you could be,” Tyler said, crossing his arms, drawing her attention to his massive pecs.
“Chasity is going to be upset when I tell her,” Derrick said, slight condemnation in his tone.
“With the baby…I didn’t want to put any stress on you two.”
“Well, she should understand. She did the same thing…but what’s the saying? Hindsight is 20/20?”
She sighed. “Okay. You got me. Full disclosure from here on out.”
“That’s what I wanted to hear.” Derrick smiled, elbowing Tyler like they had won, but Tyler kept his lips pulled tight.
“So, Tony said you had an idea of who the perp might be?” Derrick asked, clearing his throat and looking uncomfortably from her to Tyler.
“I thought maybe we could match the handwriting. You brought the letters?”
Tyler slapped them down on the table, making Megan flinch, but she moved to hide the fact that she had.
“So, all of my files from the corporation I worked for are here. Every patient had to fill out an admission form. I thought that maybe we could go through them and compare?”
“You sound like Armstrong. You know the FBI is looking for people who think like you.” Derrick winked.
Tyler stiffened.
“Not my cup of tea, thank you.” Megan continued into her bedroom.
Tyler followed her, but he hesitated in the hall as she entered.
“It’s just a bedroom,” she said, rolling her eyes, but she quickly scanned the room to make sure she didn’t have any, uh, personal items hanging about. “This is where the access to the attic is.”
“The attic?” Derrick asked, craning his neck to see into the closet where she stood.
“Yeah, that’s where the files are.”
“How’d you get them up there?” Derrick asked as he stood on tiptoe to slide the attic door out of the way.
“It’s a wonder she’s still alive,” Tyler muttered.
Megan squeezed her lips tight so she didn’t laugh, thinking of him rescuing her from her predicament the last time she tried to lift boxes up high. “Ha ha.” She hoped she got the tone of sarcasm right, and by the twitching of his lips, she had. “The movers put them up there for me.”
“Geez, it must be 120° up there,” Derrick said, sweat beading on his forehead. “It’d be better to get them in the early morning.”
“We can’t wait that long. We need this information now,” Tyler grumbled.
“If one of you gives me a boost, I’ll do it. I know the files to look for.” Megan stuffed her slacks into her socks and stepped under the opening, feeling the heat blaze out of it.
“You think we’re going to stand by while you climb up into an attic?” Tyler asked.
“What? Because I’m a woman? Give me a break. I’ve lived on my own my entire adult life. I know how to do things.”
Tyler grasped her arm, pulling her gently back. “Knowing how is commendable, but no man worth a hill of beans will stand by while a pretty lady does the dirty work.”
Megan glanced at Derrick, hoping he’d back her up, but he only shrugged and said, “I wouldn’t let Chasity do it either.”
“But Chasity is…”
“What? Small? Well, she isn’t weak. In fact, she’s the toughest woman I know.” Derrick looked at her with a penetrating gaze.
“Your wife…I was going to say your wife.” She shook her head. “I think sometimes you forget I have known her a lot longer than you.”
“Well, actually we met before you guys…”
Tyler cleared his throat, grasped the edges, and with a little hop, pulled himself all the way into the darkness.
“I have a stepladder,” Megan called up after him.
“It was taking too long,” he muttered. “Which boxes?”
“All the white ones.”
To Tyler’s credit, he didn’t utter a complaint, just manhandled the first box down to her, and she handed it to Derrick, who took it to the living room. It felt like forever by the time they got the twelve boxes of files out of the attic.
Tyler dropped back down, dripping in sweat, his shirt clinging against his chest, leaving little to the imagination about how chiseled he was. He swiped a hand across his hair, now dark and wet with sweat.
“I’ll get you something cold to drink,” she said, rushing into her kitchen to dump ice into a glass and pour cold water from the fridge over it. “Thank you,” she said while handing him the water, all anger gone.
He shrugged. “It’s not as bad as the summers in Syria, and we didn’t even have ice there.” He gave her a sideways smile before he downed the water.
“I’ll get you more.”
“Can I dig in?” Derrick asked from the other room.
“Yeah, sure…just don’t read anything…this is breaking all sorts of HIPAA rules.”
“It’s evidence, Megan. HIPAA doesn’t count.” Derrick took the first file out.
As she refilled Tyler’s glass and filled another for Derrick, she finally allowed appreciation to pour through. When she handed them their glasses, she hoped her smile conveyed how much them being there meant to her.
Tyler kept glancing at Megan. It was the only way he could stay in the present. The longer he thought about the threat, the bad guy, the fear that built up in him for someone he cared for–yeah, he cared for her–the harder it was not to descend into the past.
She met his gaze each time, and each time she looked at him like she wasn’t sure what his intentions were.
“Here,” Derrick said, pulling a paper from a file, interrupting the long stare that Tyler and Megan were having. “Look. The same quick strokes as the one in the letter.” Derrick put them side by side, smiling in triumph. “Armstrong would be proud.”
“They look similar,” Megan said, and Tyler leaned in closer to inspect the papers.
Her warmth hit him along with the sweet scent that he had come to know as hers. His arm where it rested against hers burned as if it were on fire, and he took a deep breath to steel himself.
“Close, but I say we keep looking.” Tyler said, not wanting to draw away from her.
Derrick’s face fell, and he plopped back into the couch with a sigh, his eyes straying to the lake out the window. Tyler followed his gaze, enjoying the view of the sun sinking low near the tops of the peaks on the other side of the lake.
“I can get back on it in the morning, but Chas will kill me if I miss another dinner this week.” Derrick stood, looking down at them.
Megan stood up, stretching her long limbs and pulling her shirt tight. Tyler knew he should glance away, but no amount of self-discipline could make him.
“I’m sorry to have kept you both. I can finish this up.” She glanced at the piles strewn across her living room. “We’re about halfway…” Her voice trailed off and if Tyler hadn’t been studying her already, he would have missed the momentary look of despair that filled her face.
“If Chasity doesn’t mind watching Grace for longer, I’m happy to continue the search.” He looked at Derrick, who nodded, and glanced at the work before them. “Even pull an all-nighter if needed.”
Megan sucked in a breath, making Tyler glance up at her, then to Derrick, who had a wide grin and raised eyebrows.
“I’ll leave you two to it then,” Derrick said, humor lining his voice as he stood.
“It’s not…it’s not like that, I meant…ugh,” Tyler growled.
Megan laughed, and Derrick followed suit. “Tell Chasity not to worry. I have my personal GI Joe willing to pull an all-nighter.”
Tyler scowled at the remark about the GI Joe, but he let it go. He’d do almost anything to hear her laugh. He gave Derrick a handclasp.
“Keep her safe,” Derrick said, leaning in close. “Chasity would never forgive me if something happened to her.”
“She wouldn’t be the only one,” Tyler mumbled.
After Derrick pulled away, he turned back to Megan, who was searching through her cupboards.
“We’ve got to eat,” she said with a shrug.
“We can do a to-go order from Hope’s Cafe.” Tyler’s belly gurgled loudly. “They have a fantastic burger.”
“I see,” she said with a grin. “You fly, I buy?”
Tyler hesitated, realizing he hadn’t actually gone into Hope Lake except just that day to get Derrick, and he had been so focused that he hadn’t even thought about it.
“Ahh,” she nodded. “I’ll go. Two Hope burgers coming up. Fries?”
“You don’t...I mean I can…”
She shook her head. “No, I get it. It can’t be easy returning…especially after so much has changed.”
“Going into town is like a high school reunion.”
Megan laughed. “Sounds like a nightmare. I’ll be back in a jiffy.”
As soon as she walked out the door and her car started, though, he realized he’d been a fool to let her go by herself into town. He had just sworn to protect her. He touched his holstered gun, reassuring himself it was there if needed, and took off out the door just as she drove away.
His shoulders slumped, but then Derrick’s warning hit him and he took off at a jog. It wasn’t that far to town, but his leg throbbed, shooting sharp pains with every jolt. It had been hard enough to climb into the attic and the drop…he shook his head and slowed to a walk.
“Stupid leg,” he muttered, and a flash of memory that he couldn’t keep back hit him as hard as a punch to the nose.
The pain in his leg was excruciating, but he knew he had to get to his men. They needed him. Their screams filtered through the smoke that burned his eyes and lit his lungs on fire.
Why did he think this route would be safe?
He tried to pull himself up to a stand, but the leg wouldn’t hold his weight. It kept collapsing, his foot sloshing in a sticky liquid that filled his boot. He collapsed, dropping onto his belly, crawling along the ground littered with shrapnel, fragments of their vehicles, helmets, and…. He groaned, turning his face from the tattered remnants of his platoon.
Screams fueled his efforts even as blood drained from him, leaving his face numb, tingling, and his vision blurring. He had to get to his men.
A second blast sounded, though he felt its thick vibration more than heard the blow. He curled in on himself, threading his fingers behind his neck and squeezing into a tight ball, all except the leg he couldn’t move. The screech of metal had him opening his eyes to slits just in time to see the hood of their hummer catapulting on top of him.
Tyler gasped, his hands gripping his knees as he bent over, the darkness slowly receding to show him the grass growing between the crack in the sidewalk he stood upon. He focused on the grass, a slender strip of green proving to him he wasn’t in the past of the desert but here in Hope Lake. Tires rolled along the pavement, slowing the nearer to him they came.
With a burst of effort, he forced himself to straighten and watch as the car slowed to a stop and the window rolled down. “What happened? Are you okay?” Megan shifted the car into park, undoing her seatbelt.
He held up a hand to stop her, drawing in a breath as he took the few steps to the passenger side of her car. With what felt like monumental effort, he opened the door and collapsed in the seat, pulling his leg in after him.
“I had just made it to the cafe when I realized I forgot to ask how you like your burger and when I called, you didn’t answer.” Megan watched him with furrowed brows.
His heart rate slowly eased, and he drew in another deep breath. “I’m sorry I sent you alone. That was a stupid move on my part.”
“I was fine…but you…you don’t look fine.”
“My leg,” he with clenched teeth, but continued not to meet her eyes.
“I’m sure that’s part of it, but I can tell it's not all of it. You know, you can share with me. It’s kind of what I do,” she said, with a tinge of humor, but he didn’t smile. “All of this…what’s happening in my life…is making the memories surface, isn’t it?”
Tyler snapped his eyes to Megan, his vision narrowing to slits as he took her in. The expression of concern on her face instantly hit him in two ways. One, he wanted to threaten her never to even think about bringing the subject up again, and the other was to nestle into her arms and release all the memories, so he didn’t have to hold the burden alone.
He wouldn’t do that to her. The weakness of even thinking about doing so only angered him further.
“Well done,” he mumbled.
“Huh?”
“I like my burgers well done with all the fixings…except onions.” He motioned toward town with a nod.
“Fine.” Megan put the car back into gear before she turned to him. “Just know that holding those memories captive only gives them more power over you.”
Tyler emitted a short, warning growl, and he wondered if he had turned feral with all those years spent living as he did. It wouldn’t be the first time a soldier couldn’t settle back into normal life. He didn’t want to be one of those.
He kept his thoughts to himself through dinner and the next few hours of poring over files, doing his best to keep from conceptualizing the words themselves and focusing solely on the handwriting. The task became monotonous, almost robotic, as he pulled out the last file from the box he was working on.
His heart rate spiked the moment he opened the folder, instantly awakening him from the stupor of repetitiveness.
“What?” Megan asked, the first word she had spoken in over an hour. She set down the file she had and crawled over to his side. “You found something?”
He gave a curt nod as he pulled the letters over to him, his eyes traveling from one paper to the other, scrutinizing every scratched line in the weird, almost methodical writing. “No curves,” he said, his voice gruff from not being used, as he traced the oddly angled letter C on both documents.
“That’s even more pronounced than the first one we found.” Megan took the handwritten form from his hands. “Drew Beechman.” Her eyes clouded as she searched her memory.
He waited silently, focusing on her eyes, the way they danced about as she sorted through her past. His gaze fell to her lips, where the tip of her pink tongue slightly peeked through as she concentrated. He had noticed the tongue thing when she worked with the horses as well. For a moment, it pulled him out of the predicament she found herself in, igniting a desire that he wished had died.
He was a fool if he thought he could slip back into a normal life. The last few weeks only teased him. Spending time with Megan and Krista, he had almost convinced himself to have hope—hope that he could have that perfect dream.
“That was the last of the files, right?” Megan looked up from the paper to the mess of files on her floor. “So we have two potential matches. Drew Beechman and,” she picked up the other form, “Herbert Milner.”
Tyler shoved the internal dialogue away and focused on her. “Do you remember those…patients?”
“Somewhat.” She set the two files on the table next to the letters. “I’ll remember more after reading their files.”
“I’ll call Derrick.”
Megan blinked, the glossiness of her eyes showing how tired she was. “I don’t want to wake him. I’ll call him in the morning.” She covered a yawn, looking at him guiltily. “I’m sorry. I really appreciate you helping me with this.”
He shrugged before grabbing a handful of files and putting them back in the box they had come from.
A soft touch lighted on his shoulder. “Leave it. I’ll do it tomorrow. It’s late.”
He shook his head. “Go on to bed. I’ll get this.”
“But…I…” She clamped her mouth shut, watching him with a look he couldn’t quite read.
“I’m not leaving here until we know if those men are a threat or not.” He turned back to stacking the files, ignoring her astonished look.
Finally, she squatted next to him, grabbing files and putting them in boxes.
“I meant it.” He glanced at her. “You should go to bed.”
“So should you, but you aren’t,” she countered.
“You’re swaying on your feet.” He stood and reached a hand down to her.
It took several seconds before her stubborn expression shifted into a yawn. When she lowered her hand, he took it and pulled her up. The heat of her body so close to him made him clench his jaw to keep himself in check. Wrapping his hand tighter around her hand, he led her toward her room. Noticing the slider door, he deposited her on the bed before checking the locks and scanning the room.
It wasn’t until he stood in the doorway, hand on the knob, that she spoke. “There’s a bed in the guest bedroom with clean sheets on it. Towels are in the hall cupboard if you want a shower.”
He gave her a single nod, noting the flush in her cheeks and the reaction it created inside of him. Then, grinding his teeth in resolve, he shut her bedroom door behind him. It would be a long night sleeping close enough to hear her breathe.