Chapter 24
Ifeel like reheated roadkill right now. Everything aches—my eyes are blurry and my brain feels like it’s been replaced with week-old cream of wheat.
Just one big, slightly mushy lump. It’s hard to focus even when Sarah folds her legs and flops down next to me on the floor, scooping an irritated Shaggy out of my lap, replacing him with a sandwich, and leaning a half-full bag of chips against my thigh as she chatters away on the phone.
Her honest laugh brings a small smile to my face, letting me know she isn’t talking to any of her family.
Then I hear the low rumble on the other end and know it’s Teddy that called.
Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I pick up the sandwich she brought me and tear a big bite out—peanut butter and honey.
At least I think so. My mouth felt sticky before, and I’m having some trouble processing everything at a normal speed.
Bringing it up to eye level, I peel the top piece of bread back and confirm what I already guessed, earning me a snort and a poke in the arm from Sarah.
She pulls the phone away from her smiling face.
“Do you really think I’m going to poison you?
You’ve already had to deal with the batshit crazy part of my life.
You’re stuck now.” At least she’s smiling as I munch away at my dinner.
My mind is still fuzzy as I stare over at her and Shaggy, making sure she has her own sandwich before I start on the other half of mine.
I should have checked earlier. She hasn’t been eating normally since we got back from the holiday, and it’s not a surprise at all with some of the shit her mom and sisters said about her weight.
She doesn’t understand that she’s perfect just the way she is.
She takes a big bite of her own sandwich, nodding and humming along with whatever Teddy’s saying, even though he can’t see her.
We’ve both finished our PB it’s not an issue.
We have some money saved up…No…please don’t put Sam out.
We don’t want to be a problem…Oh, well, Steve can just fuck all the way off.
No, I just…Yes, I know you love him. Come on, Thicc, I miss you.
But we can just…Ok. Ok. Yes. No…I’ll talk to Greg, but I think it’ll be a nice change of pace.
Give him time away from work and home. Ok…
Yeah. No, I’ll…I’ll let you know soon. I promise.
Thank you, both…er…all three, um…four of you, and Jake.
No, thank you. I’ll talk to you soon. Yeah…
no…Soon. Bye!” She hangs up the phone, looking chagrined and smiling bashfully at me.
Before I can open my mouth, she starts talking to me.
Her hands are moving quickly over Shaggy now, and he gives an annoyed little honking noise before head-butting her fingers and trying to steal her tortilla chip.
“No, no. No chips for you, you little thief. You don’t really want this anyway; you’re just being a butthead. ”
She’s stalling on talking to me, and we both know it.
At the same time, I don’t want to make her feel pressured.
If my mind was clear, I would already have heard what they were talking about, but work is just kicking my ass so hard this week—we’ve had to have rotating extra coverage for investigations into how the alphas that assaulted Lily got onto the grounds, but there was a lot of foot traffic that night.
It’s kind of a clusterfuck. Moreover, in my worry for Sarah, I’m barely functioning tonight.
Thank goodness my weekend started an hour ago, and I can sleep while Sarah is in classes tomorrow.
My girl chews on her lower lip as she finally meets my eyes.
What the hell made her so nervous all of a sudden?
Her voice warbles a bit when she talks. “So…um…you wanna make a road trip over spring break? Go visit Thicc and his pack? I know you don’t want to see your family, so I’m just trying to think of options. ”
Her eyes shift nervously from side to side, refusing to meet mine as my mind spins.
I don’t want to drive to Mississippi…and I don’t particularly want to fly either, but I can see if we can afford that.
I’d hate to put Shaggy through the plane trip, not to mention he’d need his own seat since he’s hardly cargo.
Still, I can understand what she meant about not staying local, and while the idea of having her so close to my own family terrifies me, she doesn’t know where they live.
She doesn’t know that we’ll practically be in spitting distance of the Arkansas state line where they finally settled down.
I’d be happy…Ok, not happy. But I would tell her if she asks. I just hope she doesn’t ask.
So, with no real argument at hand, I just plaster on my best smile and give her the only truth I can.
“It’s all good. It’ll be nice to see Teddy again and see how he settled in with his pack.
” Her eyes narrow at me for a moment before I add, “And to let you kick some alpha asses if he isn’t as happy with them as he seems to be. ”
She’s almost smug as she settles back against the couch, and I can practically see the wheels turning as she starts making plans for the break.
It’s still a couple of months away, but I figured out early on that planning, re-planning, and organizing all help her deal with some of her chaos—how she often feels like she has no real choices in life.
Letting her mind wander—and pulling my clothes out of a suitcase for the next two months whenever I need to get ready for work—is a small price to pay for her to feel in control.