Chapter 63
I’ve been trying not to notice Sarah at the gym every day.
I still need to work, and while she gives me a little wave every time she sees me, she seems to be taking into account that this is my job and I don’t want to get in trouble.
I’m supposed to be around if people need me.
I only have a couple of personal training sessions this week, and those are trials.
I don’t actually expect them to sign up for something more long term.
They just need a little hand getting started, and I’d be happy to help with that even if I wasn’t getting paid for it.
Of course, Teddy says that’s what I’m here for, so I’m just doing what I’m told.
It isn’t the kind of job I want to do for the rest of my life, but I still like being helpful.
I’m walking out of the break room when I see her sitting at the front desk, talking to Teddy and Greg.
Her smile is huge as she laughs at something the big beta says, and he blushes, smiling back at her.
While I’d never tell her to her face that she’s adorable, it makes my chest tight looking at them together.
I want to have the kind of connection that they have with each other.
And he seems like such a nice guy for her.
I do wish she was amiable to our pack, but I know that the distance is a huge problem with her family and her other scent match living back in California.
Greg already told me he would follow her anywhere, so I’m not too worried about him, but I don’t want to upend her life.
Plus, I don’t really know what we have to offer an omega.
Well, Paul and Al are pretty established in their careers, and we have a house with a nest…
but that doesn’t seem like enough. I’m not enough, and I don’t really know what I’m doing most of the time.
Claire tells me that confidence is key and I just need to visualize what I want to achieve, but I don’t know if that’s a good long-term strategy to live by.
Of course, she’s in high school; all she has to visualize is graduation, and she’s smart enough she’ll get there no problem.
But I’m done with that. I have my degree, and all I’m doing with it is hanging it on the wall like a pretty piece of overpriced artwork while I fill out applications for a teaching job.
Not that there are a lot of them; we only have one school district, so it’s kind of a wait and see sort of situation.
I sidle closer to the desk, trying to find a way to insert myself with the happy trio.
Paul said I could invite them over for dinner tonight.
He’s making stuffed peppers—finally using my rice maker, so I’m super excited about that.
But I also kind of feel like I’m gonna barf, and that would be embarrassing.
It takes them a few minutes to notice me loitering by the desk, and it’s tempting to pretend that I’m not really there to talk when all the attention suddenly turns my way.
Maybe I should just ask Teddy a work-related question so I don’t make an idiot out of myself.
No, then we’d have way too many leftovers, and I don’t know how well bell peppers freeze and reheat.
Of course, that’ll be a problem too if she doesn’t want to come for dinner.
Ugh, why didn’t I think this out better.
Maybe Paul won’t start cooking until I call, but I can’t risk it.
I want her to be in our house and in our lives.
Well begun is half done, as Dad says, which means I just have to take this step.
I am totally gonna look like an idiot.
Fuck, I already look like an idiot just standing here.
Use your words, Spence.
Open mouth, move tongue, express air.
Fucking hell.
They’re all looking at me, and I’m not sure if those were inside the head thoughts or outside the head thoughts. Hopefully inside…I don’t want to get in trouble for cursing at work. “Hey, Paul’s making stuffed peppers for dinner.”
Smile, there you go.
Nope, too much, you look like a lunatic.
Pull it back.
Teddy’s the only one to react. “Oh, that sounds good. What kind does he make? I wonder if Sam knows how. I should ask him or Vee.” Sarah and Greg nod to him, still looking over at me, and I realize I haven’t actually invited them over; I just said what we’re having.
I’d like for the floor to open up and swallow me down.
Hopefully without chewing first, ’cause that sounds painful.
“Do you want to come over for dinner? Paul’s making stuffed peppers.
” Go me, I got out a whole sentence…too bad I’m nearly yelling instead of speaking in a normal tone.
Of course, I don’t realize this until Greg and Sarah both jerk back, looking uncomfortable.
Unless they’re uncomfortable because of the invitation. Why am I doing this again?
Greg, at least, answers. “Is everything ok there, Spence? You seem to be having some volume control issues, are your ears alright?” At least their faces are now filled with concern and not annoyance or fear of the big, loud alpha.
I try to lower my tone, but have to clear my throat a few times to modulate properly so it doesn’t just sound like I slammed into the other end of that spectrum with a whisper.
“Sorry, I’m…ok. I’m nervous. We haven’t had anybody but you over since we moved in…
not for a proper dinner. Lunch doesn’t count…
and that one wasn’t thought-out in advance.
It was just a quick thing that Sam helped with, so not really us…
er, Paul, cooking food specifically for you.
Does that make sense? I’m rambling now. Please stop me before I say something super embarrassing or just run out of air and pass out. ”
Luckily, whatever it is I’m going on about is funny enough that Sarah starts giggling, Greg just smiles at her indulgently, and Teddy looks like we’ve all lost our damned minds, but I’ll take what I can get. Even right now, that’s grudging acceptance for my perceived lunacy.
“So, dinner? Paul’s a really good cook. I mean, we just did sandwiches last time you were over, so you didn’t really get a chance to taste his actual cooking, but it’s good.
I promise.” Sarah is smiling at me, while Greg nods along beside her and Teddy looks confused.
Shit, am I supposed to invite his pack too?
I didn’t ask Paul, but they are staying with them.
Is it rude not to? Shit. “Teddy, you all can come too, if you want. It’s not just them, though that’s who I was supposed to invite…
but I don’t want to be rude, y’all are more than welcome for food. ”
The big omega finally laughs, though it’s more of a chuckle than Sarah’s earlier snicker.
“Nah, I’m good. I figure Sam already has plans.
But Sarah and Greg can decide for themselves.
We brought separate cars in case Sarah started feeling bad again.
But I do appreciate the offer. I’ll pass the sentiment on to everybody at the house.
” Everybody at the house being Sam and Steve since Garret and Kelly are in the office looking over some files on the computer.
I smile gratefully at Teddy for being so much better at understanding what I needed than I was able to say.
He’s a good guy. “I get off at six today, so I’ll call Paul and tell him you two will be over for dinner with me then, unless you’re hungry now, then you can eat without me, ’cause I don’t want you to be hungry.
But I’d like to be there if you’re ok waiting for me. ”
Why can’t I talk today?
Sarah looks like she’s about to laugh again, but thankfully Greg steps in.
“No, six sounds fine. With the time zone stuff, it’s about our normal dinner time anyway, so it’s all good.
Do you want us to give you a ride back again so Paul can work on cooking, or is Al coming by?
” I’m in awe that they already understand my pack’s dynamic so well.
“That would be awesome! Al’s holed up in his room grading papers today.
He grumbled about it a lot, but I doubt it really bothers him.
He’s been going out of his mind with boredom and rearranging all the books in the library every day.
So it’s good for him to get some work done.
But Paul worked the early shift, so he should get home around three, and it’ll be faster for him this way since he won’t have to stop in the middle of everything to come get me.
Thank you!” Even to my own ears I sound overenthusiastic, but they’re just being so nice.
They didn’t have to offer me a ride home.
Teddy looks at his watch for a few seconds before turning to me.
“I don’t know if you realized, but it’s three-fifteen now.
You’d better go call Paul and let him know what’s going on.
Then get ready for your three-thirty appointment.
Ok?” It’s embarrassing that I forgot about that one.
It’s a new client and while he’s not wanting personal training, I still need to show him around and see if he needs any sort of help.
I like being useful, it’s the part of my job that I enjoy most. Plus all the examples I get to do to show proper form.
It’s win-win since it means I can skip my normal workout routine on days when I’m doing a lot of example stuff.
Still, he shouldn’t have had to remind me. I hope he isn’t regretting hiring me. I really like working here.