Chapter 20
Gunner
Gunner floated on a cloud across a blue sky, eating a bologna sandwich. Another cloud approached, tinged pink as if plucked from a sunset. Sugar lounged on top, naked and stroking his dick.
“Hi, Gunner. Sorry you died before you had a chance to fuck me.”
“Yeah. Too bad.” Gunner tried to steer closer, but a gust pushed him toward a burgeoning storm. The sky turned black, and his cloud melted away, sending him plummeting. Seconds before impact, hundreds of swords jutted up through the sand.
“No!” Gunner squeezed his eyes shut, but instead of getting impaled, something soft cushioned the fall. This time, Sugar shared his cloud. “You’re back.”
“Back for some of this.” He licked the front of Gunner’s sleep pants, turning them transparent. “Mmm, it’s so big. Let me see.” He tugged down the spit-soaked fabric, and a third arm rose, fingers waving.
Gunner screamed, and the scene shifted. Now he floated in seawater, completely naked. Was that a tentacle teasing his ass? Familiar voices came from far away.
“I thought he was waking up, but it was a sleep twitch,” a raspy voice said. He’d heard that voice before, but where? A hand brushed his forehead.
“I wish he’d open his eyes.” It sounded like Horatio Slice, but he died two years ago. The memory hurt Gunner’s chest. “At least we’d know he’s still in there.”
Wrapped in dense fog, Gunner craved sleep, but his body felt wrong. A painful ache in the crook of his left elbow. A throbbing in his throat, like he’d been kicked in the Adam’s apple. Worst was the itch deep inside his groin—a peculiar sensation too intense to ignore.
What happened to me?
The familiar voices continued a conversation he couldn’t grasp.
“He’ll recover, but it takes time, Horatio. He lost most of the blood in his body.”
“No need to remind me, Sugar. I’ll never get that visual out of my head.”
Gunner tried to process what he heard. Horatio. Sugar. Blood. Half-formed memories flashed in his brain—evasive as smoke. Pressure against his chest. A sting of pain. Red puddles in the grass.
I almost died, or maybe I’m actually dead?
Gunner’s eyes snapped open. “I don’t want to be dead!” He struggled to sit, but Sugar held him down.
“Shh, you’re not dead, but you had a traumatic injury.” Sugar patted his chest. “I’ll let you sit up soon. Stay put.”
Horatio sandwiched Gunner’s hand between his. “I’m so glad to see you with your eyes open, Cupcake.”
Something tugged at the skin of his neck. He reached up and felt a thick bandage. “Some reptilian dickbag tried to kill me.”
“Tried but failed.” Sugar tucked Gunner’s arm back under the blankets. “Go back to sleep. You need rest.”
Sleep was the last thing he wanted. He reached for his necklace, but it was gone.
“Your pendant was damaged, but it can be fixed,” Sugar said.
Gunner’s fingers still searched. It wasn’t jewelry. It was a tether to his former life. He took a deep breath. “What happened after I blacked out?”
“You remember passing out?” Horatio asked.
“But nothing after that, except some weird, kinda dirty dreams.” He checked in with his body. Everything he’d experienced while asleep was now literal, even the bizarre sensation between his legs. “Really dirty.”
“Care to elaborate?” Horatio asked.
“Stop it, you horny bastard.” Sugar chuckled despite his sharp tone. “It’s been three days since we’ve had sex, so please excuse us.”
“I’ve been in a coma for three days?” Gunner went numb. “What happened?”
They described a nightmare. After a Reptilian slit Gunner’s throat, Horatio and Sugar left the battle and carried him up the ladder to the infirmary.
“Your neck wound was… serious.” Sugar paused for a breath. “Even after I had you stitched together, the blood wouldn’t stop.”
“But Snake’s magical vampire spit took care of that,” Horatio said.
“Magical vampire spit?”
“Snake’s saliva can heal wounds. That’s why he licks after he bites. Saki uses it to make a first-aid salve, among other things,” Sugar said.
“Your tank was empty, Gun.” Tears spilled down Horatio’s face. He mopped at them with the back of his hand. “Sugar couldn’t find your heartbeat. Luckily, he keeps a few pints of Snake’s blood around.”
Gunner went from numb to paralyzed with shock. “Vampire blood saved my life?” He glanced at the IV, relieved it was saline.
“Yeah, and you needed a lot of it.” A tear dangled from Horatio’s chin. If Sugar wasn’t holding him down, Gunner would have licked it away and then kissed him until he smiled again. “You burned through the emergency blood supply and needed more.”
Sugar could barely hold it together as he continued the recap. Snake was clinging to life with Roland’s blade skewered through his face but refused treatment until Gunner was stable.
“Your friend here cut open his arm and made Snake drink. It was brave as hell, to say the least.” Sugar beamed at Horatio. “Once Snake stabilized, I set up a line from his arm to yours.”
Gunner was awestruck. “You guys saved my life.”
“That would feel great if we hadn’t been the ones who put you in danger.” Sugar removed the IV line and helped him sit.
“Besides everything else, you’re a doctor, too?”
“No, a nurse, but I do enjoy dressing up as a doctor for sexy time.” He handed Gunner a cup of water and a straw. “Small sips or you’ll vomit.”
“You ever dress up like a naughty nurse?” Horatio asked.
“You might find this interesting. In Humeria, men wear short skirts and heels. Only women wear suits and pants.”
“So you’re basically in drag all the time?” Horatio shivered. “That’s hot.”
“I kinda want to meet your mom.” When they both shot Gunner shocked expressions, he backpedaled. “Where is Snake, anyway? Shouldn’t he be resting, too?”
“Pacing. And drinking.”
“He’s inconsolable and blaming himself for the whole thing,” Sugar said.
“It’s not his fault—it’s nobody’s fault!”
Sugar fussed over Gunner’s blankets like a nervous parent. “Hungry? Stiles made minestrone today. I’ll get you some.”
Gunner desperately needed something, but not soup. As Sugar left the room, his pert ass teasing through the gape in his trousers, he fought the urge to run after him.
“You sure you’re okay?” Horatio’s genuine concern turned Gunner on. The way his snug tank accentuated his sculpted chest didn’t hurt, either.
“I’m a little out of it, like maybe I was asleep for three days.” He picked at his bandage. “Are we still in Petulia?”
“No, Grendenburg, another pirate hideout. Once you guys were stabilized, we left Petulia.” Horatio moved Gunner’s hand away from the dressing and kissed his cheek. He smelled fresh. And edible.
“I probably need a long shower.”
“Actually, Suki gave you a sponge bath twice a day. And he was thorough.”
Gunner’s face burned. “How thorough?”
“Very.”
“I’m not sure if I’m pissed it happened or mad I wasn’t awake to enjoy it.”
Horatio grinned. “I fucking missed you.”
His smile caused a vibrating sensation that centralized between Gunner’s legs. Was he actually horny? Now? Ashamed, he glanced around the room, looking for a distraction—any distraction. “Whose bunk is this?”
“Sugar and Snake’s. We’ve had a lot of orgies in this room.” Horatio pointed to an antique dresser. “These guys don’t have one naughty drawer. They have four.”
Gunner’s balls ached, but not a normal, horny kind of ache. This was a five-alarm fire, and he’d need at least ten virile firemen to extinguish the blaze.
“How’s your pain?”
“Centrally located.” Gunner squeezed two fistfuls of bed linen.
“In your neck?”
“No. Lower.” The weirdness intensified. Gunner peeked under the blankets and almost fainted.
A giant boner had risen under his sleep pants and threatened to chew its way through the cotton confines.
He yanked down the waistband and shrieked.
“There’s an alien between my legs!” He tugged the covers aside. “Look!”
Horatio blinked. “Holy fuck, Gun. That’s… majestic.”
Aroused by Horatio’s gaze, the alien stretched taller. Precum dripped. “Did Snake’s magical spit do this to me?”
“No. His blood did. You know that pill old men take when they can’t get it up? Vampires invented that shit. They use their plasma in the manufacturing process and make billions, but not just on Earth.”
Gunner stared at his junk. “How long will this last?”
“Well, one drop keeps it stiff for two hours. You had three pints.” Horatio scratched his head. “Math isn’t my strong point, but....”
“I’ll be like this for months. How will I get dressed?” Gunner whimpered. “How am I going to pee?”
“Do you need to pee?”
“No, but how will I do it when I need to?”
Horatio shrugged and offered Gunner a sip of water.
“No liquids!” He grimaced. “Can you help me take these pants off? They’re too tight.”
“That’s why you’re so pale. All the blood went to your dick.” Horatio slid the pants off and tossed them aside. “Should we ice that monster?”
Sugar walked in with a tray, and startled when he saw Gunner’s boner. Soup sloshed over the bowl’s rim. “Wow. It’s huge.” He licked his lips. “Do you want your lunch?”
“No. I want some ass.” Gunner didn’t recognize the demonic voice coming out of his mouth. “One of you fuckers needs to sit on my dick before my balls explode.” He clapped a hand over his lips.
Sugar slammed the tray on the dresser, slipped out of his suit jacket, and tossed it over a chair before Gunner could blink.
“He’s been in a coma for three days,” Horatio said. “Is this a good idea?”
“It’s a great idea.” Gunner watched Sugar unbutton his pants. “Best idea ever.”
Horatio twisted the hem of his tank. “You’re really okay with this, Sugar?”
“That depends.” He straddled Gunner’s body, ass teasingly close to his three-alarm erection. “How do you feel right now?”
“Nuclear horny.” Gunner whimpered when Sugar sucked one of his nipples. “Make that turbo nuclear horny.”
“He’s ready.” Sugar smiled at Horatio. “Trust me.”
Horatio sat perpendicular to Gunner. “As long as you’re sure?”
Gunner shot Horatio a glare. “I’m sure, and you’re next, so get your clothes off.” He cringed. “Sorry. I mean, if you want to.”