Chapter Fourteen
Roux
I hate school.
Always have, always will.
When I finally manage to escape this prison, I won’t be going to college. Roan will freak, but I don’t care. He knows how hard school has always been for me. It’s not that I don’t try, because I really do. It’s because my brain muddles when it’s time to make sense of what I’ve learned. If the teachers would give me my tests verbally, I’d probably ace them all. There’s just something about staring at the paper that gets confusing.
Karen—or Principal Frazier to everyone else—says I have a learning disability, but I even shut down when I’ve been tested for that. She’s made special allowances now that I’m at the high school. I’m given reduced homework compared to the others. I’m allowed breaks during tests and can ask questions. All sorts of crutches to help me pass.
And I still barely keep my head above water.
My senior year will be more of the same.
“Miss Hirsch,” Mr. Ewing says when the final bell rings. “Can you stay back for a minute?”
I nod and then skim my eyes over to where Charlotte is sitting. She won’t look at me or speak to me. We’re going on over a week of not talking. It’s not a phase. She won’t get over it like Kelsey thinks. It guts me.
Today, Charlotte was glued to Ryan and his inner circle. A girl named Rena has buddied up to her. Isaiah and Gunther—the two guys also messing with her that night—hang out with her and Ryan like nothing ever happened.
I guess I shouldn’t have butted in after all.
The class leaves, all of them eager to go home. It makes me wonder if Kayden will be in the parking lot when I finally make it out of here. He’d tried to pick me up for school this morning, but I ignored him to climb into Hollis’s car. I know Kayden was pissed, but we’re broken up. No matter how hard he tries to deny it.
Mr. Ewing clears his throat, drawing my attention his way. He’s a few years older than Roan. Definitely cute if you’re into the tall, lean-built, nerdy professor type. I like him because he loves poetry and has already assigned us some poems to read. I may fail his class, but at least it’ll be one of the few classes I’ll enjoy.
“I spoke to Ms. Frazier,” he says as he stands from his desk and walks over to where I’m sitting. He sits on the edge of the desk across from mine. “She said you needed some modifications for my class.”
I nod, no longer embarrassed by the spiel. This haze has followed me through my entire school career. “They usually give me extra time to take the tests or let me ask questions.” I puff out a sigh. “Though it’d be easier if you’d read the questions to me and just let me answer them.” I let out a laugh because that’s something they never allow.
“Okay.”
I jerk my head up. “Okay?”
“I can do that. Not during class because of the other students, but we can make arrangements for verbal testing after class since this is the last period of the day.”
I grin at him. “Really? Thank you!”
“Your GPA isn’t anything to write home about,” he jokes, “but I read what you turned in today. It was a good poem.”
“I love poetry,” I say with a sigh. “I love that it doesn’t seem to have order or make sense. Kind of like my mind. I have tons of it stuck to the walls in my room.”
He smiles. “That’s something we can relate on. I started a book of poems.”
“Like Atticus?”
“If only I could be that successful. Maybe you could give me some feedback one day.”
I’m shocked. Teachers never want feedback from me. Mostly I’m an annoyance—someone they have to work extra hard for.
“Mr. Ewing, I’d love that.”
“Call me Wes.” He smirks. “When we’re alone, of course. The other students have different rules.”
His words make my stomach twist in a strange way and I don’t know why. He’s just being friendly. Still, I have a small bout of nerves suddenly.
“Okay,” I mutter. “Sounds good, er, Wes.”
He chuckles, scratching at his jaw. “Don’t sound so horrified. I’m just a regular guy like your brother. How is Roan these days? He played basketball with my brother Brody.”
“He’s well. Mostly, he works for the tire factory, but he also volunteers for the fire department. Married now.”
“Married, huh? I never took him for the type to settle down with some girl, but I guess when you find the one—”
“A man.”
His brows lift. “Oh?”
“They’re happy.”
“That’s all that matters.” He nods and motions to the door. “Your boyfriend is waiting.”
I snap my head to find Kayden loitering, looking like I kicked his puppy. Grinding my teeth, I gather my bag and shake my head.
“He’s not my boyfriend.”
Mr. Ewing—Wes—flashes me a knowing smile. “See you tomorrow, Miss Hirsch.”
“Roux.” I smile and give him a small wave. “Bye, Mr. Ewing.”
As I make my way over to Kayden, he’s glaring at Wes. I roll my eyes, shoving past him and into the hall. Ignoring him, I head for the stairwell.
“Roux!” Kayden calls out. “Jesus, slow down. I want to talk to you—to apologize.”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” I grumble, taking the stairs down quickly.
He grabs my arm, stopping me. “Roux-Roux.” His lips are pouted out and his brows are furled. This act used to work. It got him his way with nearly everything where I was concerned. “Please don’t shut me out.”
I scowl, shifting on my feet. “What?”
“Forgive me.”
“It’s not that simple.”
“But it is, baby. I was fucked up that night. I didn’t mean to get so rough with you. That party was dangerous and I let it get out of control. It wasn’t safe for you to be there.” He steps closer, running his knuckle along the side of my throat that no longer bears bruising or hickeys. “I’m so sorry.”
“Apology accepted. Can I go now?”
He runs his fingers through his hair, messing it up. “I want us to get back together.”
“Look,” I say with a sigh. “You need a girlfriend who’ll be intimate with you. I’m just not ready for that.”
Never mind the fact that I won’t ever be ready.
With him.
Now Jordy, on the other hand…
I can wait for Jordy. He’ll be worth the wait.
“I don’t need that,” he murmurs, dipping low so his face is near mine. “Just you, Roux-Roux. Kissing you is enough.”
He starts to kiss me, but I pull away. I expect anger since he’s been acting like a twat lately. Instead, his features crumble.
“I really fucked this up.” His voice is hoarse, like he might cry. “Roux, baby, let me make it up to you.”
“Kayden,” I say in exasperation. “I need space.” I’ve barely made it to the bottom of the stairs, when he grabs my hand, pulling me to him. I jerk my hand free, but he’s undeterred, stepping closer.
“Fine. I’ll give you space, but then I’m going to win you back. You’ll see. I can be romantic.” He flashes me a flirtatious grin that used to make me weak. “Prepare to fall back in love with me.”
He walks backward down the now-empty hall, grinning at me. Eventually, he makes it to the outside doors and leaves. I let out a heavy sigh filled with frustration. It’s then I get the creepy sensation I’m being watched.
I swivel around, looking down both hallways and back up the stairs. Nothing. No one. I’m about to head out the door when someone coughs. A man. I creep over to Mrs. Duffy’s classroom. It’s empty, with the lights out, and she’s no longer in it.
“You’re not supposed to be in there,” I tell the man who’s standing near the whiteboard with his back to me.
He’s definitely a teacher, I think, based on his dressy suit. The guy is probably Mike’s age. Older, but not too old. He checks his watch and turns toward me, smiling. “Pardon me.”
“Are you a teacher?”
His lips thin out. “No.”
“A parent?”
“No.”
“You’re a cop,” I breathe out.
He blinks hard at me. “I’m not a cop.”
“What’s your name?”
His jaw clenches. “Tom.”
“You’re being creepy, Tom.”
At this, he laughs. “Duly noted.” He cocks his head to the side. “I couldn’t help but notice you having a fight with your boyfriend.”
“He’s not my boyfriend.”
“Er, friend. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. He just thinks we’re something we’re not.”
“I see. Take care, miss. Stay away from pushy assholes.” He smirks. “And creeps.”
“I’m trying,” I grumble, “but you guys are so plentiful in this town.”
“I’m not from this town,” he argues, a smile in his voice.
“Maybe you should go back where you came from.”
“You’re not as weak as I thought.” He takes a step toward me and I take a step back.
“I don’t know who’s been telling you I’m weak or how you even think you know me, but that’s super creepy.”
“I’ll work on my creepiness. I didn’t realize it was so obvious.”
I’ve backed myself almost to the bank of lockers. Tom remains hidden inside the dark classroom.
“Very obvious, but I think God made creeps be obvious, so people like me could stay away.”
“Pretend you never saw me, Roux.”
I cringe at him knowing my name.
Weirded out by that fact, I take off running down the hall, bursting out the side door. No one chases after me, but try telling my racing heart that. I run my way over to a crowd of kids that have formed in the parking lot around two cars. Kayden’s and someone I don’t know.
Kayden’s lost his T-shirt and stands there in a tank, his arms spread open in a taunting way. Hard to believe just a few minutes before, he was giving me the saddest eyes ever and trying his damnedest to romance me. Now he’s back to being a prick.
No, thank you.
I scan the parking lot for Hollis. He said he’d pick me up, but I don’t see his familiar purple Mustang. My eyes do, however, stop on a navy-blue Camaro.
“Boo.”
I nearly jump out of my skin. “Jordy!”
He sidles up beside me, careful not to touch me. It’s been driving me crazy. Aside from a few hugs this week, he’s kept his distance.
I can wait.
I can wait.
I brush my fingers against his. Apparently I can’t wait.
“I missed you.” I peek up at him and smile. “How was work?”
He gives me a lazy, half smile. “Missed you too, Little Hornet. Work was fine. Got a raise and a promotion.”
“What?!” I squeal and throw myself into his arms, uncaring if anyone sees. “That’s amazing!”
He tries to shrug it off. “It’s just from dishwasher to cook.”
“But you love to cook.” I grin, inhaling him. “This is exciting.”
His dark eyes roam down to my lips. “I guess it is.”
“Tonight, we’re celebrating.”
He pulls away and turns his attention on the crowd. It’s then I realize he wasn’t supposed to pick me up.
“You’re here to give me a ride?” I ask, frowning. “Where’s Hollis?”
“Nah, just a job.” He nods at Kayden. “Make sure his dumb ass doesn’t get shot.”
He ended up telling me this week that Rex is making him keep tabs on Kayden. I don’t like it a bit, but it’s better than chopping cars, which he told me was the alternative.
The guy Kayden was taunting seems to back down, nodding at him. They do the dumb guy thing where they sort of shake hands and sort of hug. Then, the guy leaves. Kayden then starts laughing with some of his friends.
“I think he’s fine. Want to get snow cones? The stand will only be open a couple more weeks.” I’m already texting Hollis to let him know Jordy’s picking me up.
His eyes dart to the dispersing group for a second before latching back on mine. “Yeah, let’s get snow cones. He can handle himself.”
Jordy motions for me to walk with him. His hair is still wet from his shower after work and he smells strong like limes. I wonder if he tastes tangy too.
I’m just about to climb into Jordy’s Camaro when I feel eyes on me. Not creepy ones. Angry ones. I turn in time to see the look of disgust on Kayden’s face when he sees who I’m getting in the car with.
Screw him.
Jordy is Roan’s best friend. I have nothing to feel guilty over.
My mind can’t help but wonder, though. If Kayden gets super pissed about me being in the same vicinity as Jordy, I can only imagine what sort of meltdown he’ll have when I finally get Jordy to kiss me and claim me as his.
I have seven months to worry about that.
Maybe by then he’ll have a new girlfriend.
If not, I’m in serious trouble.