Chapter 16 Dimitri #4
I mean to hold her gaze as I enter her, but when I feel her thighs pulling back from mine, opening for me, I can’t help sitting back on my heels and looking down. I can’t resist tracing my fingers one more time along her slit—dipping them in, just barely, for a taste of what’s waiting for me.
I spread her lips and watch as the head of my cock slides inside. She keens at the stretch and I withdraw, anchoring my hands at the backs of her thighs, under her knees, holding them down. I push back in, just as slowly, and watch her open around me.
“Oh god—fuck, like that.”
My fingers dig into her legs in response.
I pulse my hips, thrusting in that same shallow way—forcing her to spread around the tip over and over.
I felt with my finger that her g-spot is low, close to her entrance.
As I give her just a bit more length, I know the flared base of my head is rubbing over it.
“Oh my god…that’s—it’s—oh fuck—”
Her eyes are squeezed shut, and her hands are pressing against my stomach. Holding me back, keeping me in place, as I drive hard against her inner wall over and over.
“Oh, fuck, Dimitri, don’t stop—”
She doesn’t need to worry. I know exactly what I’m doing. Fucking her like no one else would ever think to fuck her—with my cock barely inside her. It takes all of my control not to slide home deep into her perfect tight, wet cunt, but this isn’t about me. This is about her.
And that’s exactly what I see in her eyes when they fly open.
When she watches in open-mouthed shock as I push her over the edge with less than half of what I have to give her.
Her legs push against my hands, and I let go.
I let her move beneath me exactly how she needs to ride the waves of pleasure.
She’s pulsing around me, again and again, and the bottom edge of her slit is pressing against the underside of my head on every one. And that. I hadn’t accounted for that.
“Fuck,” I bite out.
I’d thought to tease her a bit more before giving her the rest, but I can’t stay like this.
And the thought of pulling out is too painful to even consider.
So I push into her with the aftershocks still rippling around me, and she cries out again.
I bottom out inside, and her eyes find mine as her hips come flush with her thighs.
I wonder if she can see it on my face as my mouth falls open. I wonder if she knows that she feels like… like everything.
I think she might know when she yanks my arms out from under me and my weight falls on top of her. I think she has an idea when she puts both hands on my jaw and kisses me like her life depends on it. I think there’s no possible way she doesn’t know when I roll my hips and groan into her mouth.
Her hands find my back as I start to move, and she holds me tight to her chest. But I break the kiss as I begin to search.
There is one more spot I need to find. Because while I don’t know how many men she’s been with (and I don’t want to know), I want to be the last one she ever will be.
Once I find this spot, it’ll be her downfall.
I look for it in the crease of her brow. I listen for it in the space between her breaths. I feel for it in the dig of her nails across my skin.
And when I find it, I know it’s over. I pound against it, again and again, and I nearly laugh when she realizes it after I do.
“Oh, fuck, right there!”
“You like that?” I ask, fighting the smirk on my lips.
“Yes, fuck, yes, yes.”
“How does it feel?” I don’t know why I ask that. I know it’s good.
“So fucking good. Your cock…”
My cock? What about it? Suddenly I’m desperate to know.
“Tell me how it feels,” I demand.
She gasps. “Oh god, it’s so…big.”
Fuck yes. Now I’m definitely smirking.
“So deep, so full,” she moans.
“That’s right,” I snarl. “Take it.”
“Want to feel you…”
“Yes, feel it.”
“… come inside me.”
I think a small explosion actually occurs in my brain when I remember that I’m going to come, too. This is her last one. When I feel her clench on my cock this time, I’m going to fill her sweet cunt so full of me she’ll taste it on her tongue—
“Fuck,” I mutter again as that thought nearly pushes me over. She moans loudly, and I wonder if she can feel me throbbing. I mentally shake my head. This isn’t about me.
I look back down to where we’re joined, where I’m pounding into her. Her breasts are bouncing on every thrust, and I push her just a little bit faster.
“I’m the person you’re ever going to fuck again.”
“Fuck, it’s so good.” She’s babbling again.
“No one else will compare to me.”
“Oh my god, I’m going to come again.”
“No one else.”
“Oh, god, Dimitri, please don’t stop.”
As if I could stop. I’d have to die first. My eyes fall closed, and I let myself really feel the grip of her walls as I slide between them. The supple stretch. The perfect squeeze.
“Oh, fuck, I’m coming!” Her voice is near hysterical, halfway between crying and laughing, but I don’t care.
I let go as her first tremors flutter around me, and the pulsing of my cock drives her over the edge.
The pleasure is blinding as it rips through me like lightning—up through my thighs and down my spine.
Her pussy is relentless, clamping down on me over and over, and long, low groans are pouring off my lips as I feel her growing slick with my come.
Her hands are still tight on my back as my hips jerk into her, and her chest shudders against me with sobs of relief.
I bury my face in her neck as I follow her, my whole body shuddering with release. And in that moment of complete vulnerability, something escapes my lips that I didn’t mean to say. Something I can’t take back.
“I need you.”
The words are muffled against her skin, barely audible, but I feel her go still beneath me and hear her breath catch.
We stay like that for a long moment, both of us breathing hard, both of us trying to process what just happened. What I just admitted.
“We probably shouldn’t have done that again,” she finally says, but there’s no conviction in her voice.
“No.” I pull back enough to look at her, cupping her face in my hands, feeling sweat trickle down my back. “Probably not.”
But even as I say it, I know I’d do it again. I would do it every time if it meant feeling like this—connected, grounded, and less alone than I’ve felt since Alexei died.
“Dimitri—” She starts, but I cut her off.
“I can’t lose you too,” I confess. “I can’t. Everyone I—everyone I let myself care about ends up dead. My mother. My father. Alexei. And now someone’s trying to kill you, and I can’t—I fucking can’t go through that again. I can’t lose you.”
Her eyes fill with tears, and she pulls me down into a kiss that tastes like salt and something sweeter. Relief, maybe. Understanding.
“You won’t,” she whispers against my lips. “You won’t lose me.”
It’s a promise she can’t make and we both know that. But in this moment, I let myself believe it.
We separate slowly. I help her up from the chair, steadying her when her legs wobble slightly. We dress in silence, but it’s not awkward. In fact, the air is rife with possibility, with whatever shift just happened between us.
When we’re both clothed again, we just stand there, looking at each other in the lamplight. The office is still a disaster but none of it seems as important as it did an hour ago.
Nothing seems as important as her.
“Come on,” she says softly, taking my hand.
I furrow my brow. “Where—”
“Upstairs.” She tugs gently. “To my room. You need to sleep, and I—” She stops, color rising in her cheeks. “I want you in bed with me.”
My heart, already hammering against my ribs from the force of my orgasm, skips a beat. I know if I agree, everything will be irrevocably changed, and part of me tells me to say no. To tell her I’m staying in my office and she should go to bed.
But her hand is warm in mine, and I’m so tired of fighting this. I’m so tired of being alone.
“Okay,” I nod.
She leads me out of the office, down the hallway, up the stairs. We don’t speak. Instead, we just exist in this bubble where the rules don’t seem to apply, where we can hold hands and want each other and not have to explain it.
When we reach her room, she closes the door behind us. I expect her to guide me to the bed so she can lay against me as she’s done before.
Instead, she turns to face me. And the dark look in her eyes makes my heart do somersaults.
“Vera?” I ask, but she cuts me off.
She rises on her toes and kisses me.
And I’m powerless to do anything but kiss her back