10. Char
10
CHAR
I nteresting. So this was what a nervous breakdown felt like. Reality was slipping through my fingers, and I existed in a waking dream.
A dream where alien shifters came to Earth looking for mates. Wolf and bear shifters were real. Possibly vampires.
And I was staring up at a fucking spaceship.
Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, I didn’t really believe I was dreaming. It was better to be sane, right? Right.
“Charlotte? Char?”
I was fairly sure Ryoch had been saying my name for a while. He sounded worried.
“Yes?” My face tilted upward as I craned my neck to see.
What had looked like a large barn from far away, in a field adjacent to the bar, turned out to be an enormous hangar. The black metal behemoth that filled it had to be four stories tall and several hundred feet long.
“I know it’s a lot to take in.”
“That is a massive understatement.” I dragged my eyes away from the ship.
Ryoch smiled at me, dimple and all, and a flame lit in my chest. It wasn’t the panty-ruining heat I was used to, although that was there too. His smile made my heart flutter and warm at the same time. Some of the tension I was holding eased, and my limbs relaxed.
“Let me show you the inside. We keep the ship on standby for emergencies, but no one has been here in a while. It’s just the two of us.” He extended his hand. “Come. You weren’t afraid before.”
It was true. Even though this whole situation ought to terrify me, and despite my general trust issues, I knew Ryoch wouldn’t lead me into danger. I’d been scared of him when we first met, but not anymore.
Now the eyes and horns and everything else had an explanation. The intensity too. Their reason for being here was intense. And romantic.
They were here searching for mates . Ryoch hadn’t gone into a lot of detail, saying that it was a small group of unmated males who’d come to Earth, but he’d made it sound urgent and heartfelt.
Maybe I’d freak out again if I saw the real him? I’d only glimpsed parts of what he actually looked like, and I was curious about the rest. But I didn’t want to ask him to shift for me, like he was an animal on display.
Bottom line, I felt safe. It wasn’t like I was his mate. Now that would be scary.
I took Ryoch’s hand, and he led me to a solid wall of metal. From what I could see, the ship overall was shaped like a teardrop, wide at one end and narrow at the other. The surface was black, opaque like a void. I could tell it was some kind of metallic material, but it didn’t shine at all.
Ryoch stood still. Then a swish sound and sudden movement made me jump. A doorway slid open in front of us, revealing a gleaming, silver metal hallway beyond.
“Holy shit,” I whispered. This is real, this is real, this is real.
He stepped through the doorway and pulled me along with him.
During my tour, I probably said three words. All I could do was gawk. Ryoch explained that there were no windows, all the views to the outside were through cameras. Doors opened with biometric sensors. He showed me the dining hall with its food synthesizer, the ship’s control room, and a bathroom. We ended at the medical bay, where he gestured to the equipment.
“I qualified for the voyage because I fit the profile, but they were very pleased to have a doctor on the mission. We don’t know yet how…certain things will work.”
I leaned against the shiny metal wall and scanned the room. It was recognizably medical, sterile and a bit cold, with two patient beds and a small seating area. Shelves were stocked with unfamiliar devices and implements, labeled in a foreign script.
Finally, my brain caught up enough to let me ask questions.
“You said that in your shifted form, even blood tests wouldn’t reveal anything unusual. Why would you need a doctor?” For the moment, I ignored the fact that Jess and I could see some of their alien features. No one else seemed to notice, which was strange.
He avoided my eyes and tucked his hands in his pockets. It set me on edge. Were they running medical experiments on humans? A pit formed in my stomach.
“We… We don’t know what to expect during pregnancy, birth, and early development. Lydaxians have only rarely mated with other species before, so we have very little data.”
“Oh.” Somehow, I hadn’t made the connection between mates and children.
“It’s not really my area of expertise. I was an emergency room physician on Vytaris. Before we left, I did a rotation with our finest specialists, following pregnancies and attending births. During the voyage, I studied everything I could about human anatomy and reproduction, along with all the other learning we had to do in preparation.”
He’d told me that they were on the ship for eight months. It didn’t seem like enough time, and I wondered what information they had access to. They were either very smart, or good at improvising. Maybe both.
“How the hell did you get a job as a doctor here?”
“It’s classified.” He waited a beat, then smiled. “Actually, it’s kind of simple. Lydaxians have been doing this type of thing for generations. We have the tech to create comprehensive identities. Unless we do something to reveal ourselves, no species ever knows when we’re among them.”
That was…pretty creepy. Ryoch’s face clouded over, as if his thoughts were troubled. There was a story there, I was sure of it.
“But I can see that you’re not human. So could Jess.”
He nodded slowly, a heated look bringing out the silver in his eyes. “Mates can tell.”
I stiffened and stood forward from the wall. For the first time since I’d gotten in his car, I felt a wave of fear.
No. No, no, no. Don’t say it.
“You are my mate, Charlotte. Jess is Gravod’s mate.”
Fuck . I groped for a response, my heart racing.
“Oh. And mates are…?” Maybe it wasn’t too serious, the whole mate thing. Even though they’d come an extremely long way to find them.
His heated gaze turned fiery, and his voice deepened. “Soulmates. The perfect match. Compatible…in all ways.”
My throat was dry as I tried to swallow. “You’re sure I’m yours?” I rasped. But I already knew.
Ryoch tipped his chin down in a solemn nod. “I’m sure.”
Me. Jess. Mates. Aliens. Alien babies? My head spun.
It’d been sort of abstract before. Like, oh, mates, isn’t that fascinating . Now it was way, way too personal. And glaringly obvious. From the second we met in the bar, right up to this moment, I felt a connection to him. And I could see things no one else did.
Fuck.
He stepped toward me, lusty gaze replaced by a worried frown. “Do you need to sit down? I was going to show you my quarters.”
“Sitting sounds good.” I was feeling dizzy.
Ryoch took my hand in a firm but gentle grip and led me down a series of hallways, ending at a closed door that opened as we approached. Then we were in his room, his spicy and reassuring scent filling the space. For a moment I just breathed, trying to clear my mind, and took it in.
It felt like him. Not the metal floor and windowless walls, but the intimate details, the style. A brightly colored cloth was draped over his mattress. Books were stacked in a niche in the wall, arranged by order of height. A blue object carved with geometric designs stood in the corner, reminding me of a large decorative vase.
But what really caught my eye was a piece of art hanging on the wall, a coastal landscape. It looked like a photograph, except it couldn’t be—the colors were impossible. The sky was full of wispy purple clouds, and there were two distinctive spots of sunlight shining through them, illuminating a churning ocean below in rays of violet.
Ryoch stood next to me as I stared at the image. “This is my favorite beach on Vytaris. At Syral, near my hometown. I took the picture shortly before we left, to preserve the memory.”
My breath stopped. This is real . I was looking at an alien world. Maybe the first and only human ever to see it. “It’s beautiful,” I whispered.
He looked at it with me, still and silent, then put his hand on my lower back. “Here. I promised you could sit.” With his warm touch, he guided me to the bed, the only furniture in the small room. We sat, and he turned to face me, eyes searching mine. “What are you thinking?”
I blew out a breath. “It’s a lot. I visited my friend in the hospital this morning, and now I’m walking around a spaceship. You’re telling me I’m your mate, but I only just met you. I know you don’t really look human, but I also haven’t seen the real you. And…I’m scared.”
He stroked his thumb over the back of my hand. “The last thing I want is to frighten you.”
“No.” I shook my head. “I’m scared because you don’t frighten me, if that makes sense. I’ve never believed in soulmates, or love at first sight, or whatever it is you think we are to each other. The idea that we’re fated to be together or something… It’s overwhelming.”
But I wasn’t telling him everything, or being entirely honest with myself. I didn’t say that I felt drawn to him, as though tugged by an invisible force. The heat of his body next to mine was doing things, sparking feelings. Making my heart twinge with longing. His scent surrounded me, stronger here in his room, and it was all I could do not to lean into him.
Ryoch gripped my hand. “I understand. I’ve never experienced this before, and I thought I never would.” He sighed. “And it’s fast. Humans usually expect a few dates with someone first, before jumping into a relationship.”
I laughed at how he made that sound inconvenient. It lightened the mood, and he smiled.
“Yes, we typically spend time getting to know the other person,” I said. “Do Lydaxians not date?”
“Mates find each other when they reach maturity. There are plenty of matching opportunities, and when they know, they know. It’s expected to be quick.”
I didn’t miss the wince around his eyes when he talked about it. Considering he—and a dozen or so other guys—had been willing to travel to another galaxy, having a mate was clearly a very important part of their culture.
And I thought it was tough being single on Earth.
“What if it doesn’t work out between mates and they break up?” The idea of an instant, perfect match seemed so unrealistic.
“I’ve never heard of a failed mate pairing. I know it’s not the same here.”
“No. Definitely not the same. My parents might have been in love once, but after they had me, whatever they’d felt died a horrible death. They couldn’t stand to be near each other. Or near me, for that matter.”
Well. That was some confessional shit. Ryoch straightened, but he didn’t let go of my hand.
“That would never happen on Vytaris. Children are treasured.” His voice softened. “Mates bond in their hearts and souls. Permanently. Among Lydaxians, it’s an emotional tether...”
I shivered. That sounds nice.
“We don’t know whether the same bond will form with a human mating.”
My heart stuttered. I’d been waiting for the other shoe to drop, and there it was.