Chapter Thirty-Five
Lyndsey
I’m awoken to the smell of coffee and Aiden lightly nudging my shoulder. The only problem with that picture is that it is still dark outside, way too early to be awake. So I try to roll back over.
“Darlin’, I need you to wake up.” Even through my sleep-fuelled haze I can hear the tightness in his voice. I roll back over so I can see him and I’m shocked to see him already dressed.
“What’s going on?” I bolt up in bed, sleep fading away every second.
His jaw is tense but he is still looking at me with softness in his eyes.
Like he is genuinely rattled. Even the day William died he was more balanced, he started looking after his sisters and pushed his own emotions down.
Right now I can see every worry and bit of anger he is trying to suppress.
“Cassie called. The PI has something for us, they are waiting at the arena.” My whole world stops.
Then everything starts spinning. My heart pounds in my chest as the room shifts under me.
Aiden slides into the bed, his jeans hard against my naked legs but there is nothing sexual about it.
He pulls me to his chest and it is when I feel the wetness on his oversized T-shirt that I realise I’m crying.
I’m relieved that this might be over. But more than that, I’m scared.
Scared that someone really hates me this much.
Scared of actually facing whoever has tried their best to pull me down.
Scared that I might not even know them. That there might be a person out there who hates me even when they don’t know me.
There is the other option: that I do know them.
That someone I might care about wants to ruin me.
Another fear starts to rise. The fear that if this day goes the way I want it to, that we catch whoever this is, that I won’t get to live with Aiden any more.
We haven’t discussed divorce and I know he cares about me.
We sleep in the same bed, fuck every chance we get, and he even made me a private dining experience – I never knew Aiden was capable of thinking about such things.
But we were pushed together through circumstance and lies.
I don’t want it to unravel. This whole relationship, this love I’ve fallen into, could be hanging by a thread.
I push closer into his chest, needing the comfort only he can bring me, and he lets me cry. Slowly rubbing up and down my spine until I’m able to catch my breath. Still my mind runs a thousand miles an hour, trying to figure out who it could be.
Then there is the idea it might be a crazy Spears fan.
Someone who thinks I’m not good enough for Aiden.
But how would they get my number? How would a stranger know about my sexuality?
I can imagine people being jealous that I’m his wife but doing all this just seems silly.
Then again, when people are caught up in their emotions, they do crazy things.
Fans have killed their idols before so blackmailing their wives isn’t completely out of the realm of possibility.
I dress in silence, not ready to voice all of my anxieties.
Aiden already looks on edge: his jaw clenches and he keeps mumbling to himself.
The tension in the room is so thick that it feels hard to swallow.
Not wanting to push him, I stay in my own world, imagining every possibility as we make our way to the stadium.
“Can you promise me something?” My words are a bullet through the silence. Aiden’s eyes dart from the road to me as we pull into the staff parking at the arena.
“Anything,” he tells me, taking one hand from where he is white-knuckling the wheel and lifting my hand in his, weaving our fingers together.
“Don’t let whatever happens in there change the way you look at me. Don’t hate me.” My chest feels tight and it’s hard to hold his gaze but I try.
“Darlin’… I’m doing everything I can to keep my anger in check.
Half of me wants to find whoever is doing this and beat them to a pulp and the other half wants to take you home and lock us away so we don’t have to face this.
” His chest heaves and his fingers tighten between mine.
I go to comfort him but before I can he continues, “I’m not mad at you, Lynds, I’m pissed that you had to deal with this and glad that it might be over.
I’m just trying to keep my emotions in check so I can support you. ”
“We can do this.” I don’t know if I’m trying to convince him or myself but he nods at me anyway, leaning over and taking my jaw in his hand.
“Together,” he whispers against my lips, kissing me lightly.
By the time we make it to Cassie’s office she is waiting with the PI behind her desk, a manila envelope waiting in front of her.
“Thanks for coming, guys, how are you holding up, Lynds?” she asks with a sad smile. My hands start to sweat and I can’t talk through the lump in my throat. Instead I just nod.
“What do you have?” Aiden asks Lewis, the PI.
This is the second time I have met him, the first being just after Aiden demanded I move into his place, and he looks exactly like I imagined a PI to be.
He is a short man, not much taller than me, with thinning hair.
Frankly he could be green with spiky purple hair for all I care, as long as he has found the culprit.
“Mrs Anders, this isn’t going to be easy to hear.
” He pauses before picking up the envelope and passing it over to me.
“I traced the number, it was a burner but he used his credit card to buy it. I followed him for a few days and he has been in and out of poker rooms. My guess is that he is deep in debt.”
My hands shake as I open the folder. There are a few pictures inside, different angles and different shady bars in the background. The man in the pictures, though, he looks the same as I remember him. Just more tired and thin.
“Him? Who is it?” Aiden asks from beside me, but his voice sounds like I’m underwater. My shaking hand comes up to cover my mouth, tears streak down my cheeks.
I manage to push out two words before sobs rack my body. I almost choke on them.
“My brother.”