CHAPTER TWENTY
Jagger
I read until about eleven-thirty.
It wasn’t that I thought Soloman was going to come back, it was that I couldn’t get Raina, or the life she escaped, out of my head.
The woman was … extraordinary. All four of them were.
While I didn’t know what hell the other three women escaped, I’m sure parts of it mirrored Raina’s life, if they all had run away.
And now, after all this time, her brother-in-law thought he had a claim on Marco? The man was clearly delusional. Drunk on the Kool-Aid his “congregation” served up, with probably a heavy dollop of misogyny, narcissism, and maybe even sociopathy.
I was just about to turn off the small table lamp and try to get to sleep when there was a soft knock at my door. I didn’t have a chance to get up and answer it before it opened, and Raina’s green eyes appeared through the crack in the door.
I sat up, the covers sliding off my bare torso to pool at my waist. “Everything okay?”
She slipped into the room wearing a pair of light-purple pajama shorts and a dark-gray, off-the-shoulder, baggy long-sleeve shirt. She closed the door, and the slight click of the lock surprised me. “I couldn’t sleep,” she said, climbing onto the bed on her knees.
“Was the light bothering you?”
She shook her head. “No. I can’t see it from my room.”
“Are you all right?”
Her throat moved on a hard swallow. “I was just laying there, staring at the ceiling, thinking about how great my life is.” She blinked a few times.
“Because my life is pretty great, Jagger. I’m free of that man, that life.
I have an amazing kid. A thriving business.
Cousins who I would do anything for and who would do anything for me. ”
“And you deserve all of it.”
“I’ve changed a lot since the day Josiah died.
Since the day Marco and I were free of him, and we fled Idaho and moved to Seattle.
I wasn’t sure I wanted to move to the island, you know?
Naomi was the first to come here, then Gabrielle, then Danica, and finally, me.
I thought I wanted to live in the big city.
I grew up and lived in this rural part of Idaho, and I didn’t think I wanted that kind of a life again.
I wanted the hustle and bustle of the city. ”
I nodded. “It does have its appeal in some ways.”
“I realized after I ran out on you in the café that I still had a lot of growing to do, and the city wasn’t the place for that.
Not if I wanted to find myself, while also having someone I trusted look after Marco so I could find myself without a baby on my hip.
So I moved here. And I’ve grown so much since coming to the island.
” She huffed a humorless laugh. “I’m not sure you’d believe me if I told you I wasn’t this confident or …
sassy, growing up. Or when I was with Josiah.
I was a shell of a person. I cowered and shrunk myself so small, just to avoid getting berated or abused.
I did what I was told. I never argued. I never stood up for myself.
I was taught that my voice didn’t matter. ”
“It very much matters,” I said softly. “It matters to me.”
Her smile was small and sweet. “I realized as I lay there in bed that the only hold Josiah still has on me is sex. Sex and relationships. He’s the only man I’ve ever been with.” Her cheeks grew even pinker. “Except for the other night at the B&B.”
I didn’t want to smile too wide, but it was more of a challenge than I expected.
“I don’t want to be scared anymore. I like the person I’ve become—or that I’m becoming. I’m tired of letting a dead man stop me from going after what I want. From asking for what I want. I want to enjoy sex, and I want it to be with someone who I choose. Who I’m attracted to.”
I wasn’t not an idiot. I could pick up on her wavelength, but at the same time, I needed to make sure she knew what she was saying. “What exactly do you want, Raina?” I asked gently, my cock thick and eager in my pajama pants beneath the covers.
A cute, shy smile tugged up on the right side of her mouth right before she reached down and pulled her top over her head and tossed it to the floor. “I want you , you jerk.”
It was impossible not to zero in on the tight, perky points of her nipples.
They were a dusky pink, hard, and just begging for my mouth.
She crawled up toward me, her hair piled high on her head in a sexy, messy bun with ginger wisps coming down around her face and behind her ears.
On her knees, with her hands on either side of my thighs, she leaned in and gently bit my bottom lip.
“Do you want me?” she whispered, moving her mouth down to my neck.
I groaned and shut my eyes. “More than you could ever know.”
“Show me what it’s really like, Jagger. What it’s supposed to be like.” Lifting her gaze back up to mine, her eyes hooded, she blinked a few times, unease washing across her features for a moment. “Touch me … please.”
It required every ounce of restraint I had within me not to go feral on this woman.
She didn’t deserve that, not for her sort-of-first time.
Sure, I wasn’t her first in a technical sense.
But I was the first person she was consenting to.
I was the first man she asked to touch her.
And that came with an immense amount of responsibility.
Carefully, slowly, my hands came up, and I cupped her breasts, swiping my thumbs over her nipples and feeling them harden in my grasp. She moaned a little as she played with my mouth, nibbling and biting, sliding her tongue across my lips, sucking and exploring.
All I wanted to do was grab her by the back of the head and devour her. But I didn’t want to scare her. She’d had enough fear for the night.
I cradled the back of her head and guided her down to the bed as I hovered over her. “You’re beautiful,” I said, staring down into her eyes. “You really are.”
Her arms came up around my neck and she pulled me down for a kiss. I let her lead at first, but then she stopped and moved her head away for a second. I pushed back enough to meet her eyes.
“What’s wrong?”
“Am I kissing okay?”
“Yes?”
“Why did you frame it as a question?”
Then it hit me. “Am I … did you and Josiah …”
“We never kissed, no.” She shook her head, and her eyes drifted to the side for a moment as she chewed on her bottom lip.
“Besides on our wedding day, and that was more of a peck.” Her gaze met mine again.
“You’re the first man I’ve ever really kissed.
So I don’t know if I’m doing it right.” Her mouth twisted. “I don’t want to suck at it.”
Her innocence and sweetness were endearing. “You’re kissing just fine, Elsa. Don’t overthink it, okay?”
“Can you just take the lead? I kinda don’t want to think at all.”
Nodding, I dropped my mouth to her neck. “I can do that.”
She arched her back, pressing her breasts against my chest as I licked and sucked at her neck before moving my mouth along her jaw, scraping my teeth and beard, before finally taking her mouth.
She followed my lead as I pried her mouth open with my tongue and slowly dipped it inside, exploring and coaxing, sucking and savoring.
She mewled a little when I brought one hand up to her breast and rolled the nipple between my thumb and finger.
Her back arched more, and my cock pressed eagerly into her thigh.
She grounded herself against me, but I wasn’t going to rush this.
Raina deserved all the foreplay. All the lead up. All the orgasms.
“Jagger,” she whimpered when I peeled my mouth away from hers, dragging it back over her jaw and neck. Her hands fumbled between us, trying to tug down the waistband of my pajama pants.
“Patience,” I murmured, dropping my mouth down to her clavicle, then over to each breast where I swirled my tongue around her nipples before sucking them into my mouth until she gasped and arched her back again.
Her growl had me smiling as I sucked one nipple into my mouth.
“My patience is like a gift card. Not sure how much is left on it, but we can try.” She slipped her fingers through my hair as she held me to her chest. My mouth alternated between each breast while the other hand rolled the opposite nipple into a tight peak between my fingers.
Her hips leaped off the mattress a few times, and she groaned when I moved my mouth down across her sternum, then swirled it around her bellybutton.
I reached for the waistband of her shorts and gently slid them down her thighs, exposing the trimmed patch of red hair.
Immediately, I pressed my nose there as two fingers explored her center, swirling her arousal around her entrance.
My tongue flicked her clit, and she sucked in a sharp breath.
I did it again, rewarded once more with such a surprised reaction.
Her croon of contentment spurred me on and I sunk to my belly, my mouth on her pussy as I ate my fill. Every time I could tell she was close, I’d back off a little, earning a growl from the little porcupine with the spiky quills who had a tough time letting anybody get to know her.
All I did was smile, play her like a beautiful fiddle, and push her right back to the edge once more. She was frantic, swollen, and oh-so-slick by the time I pushed my fingers inside her slippery center, pressing up slightly while crooking my fingers just so.
She exploded within seconds. Her upper body lurched off the bed as her abdomen contracted, and a warm gush of honey flowed over my fingers. I sucked hard on her throbbing clit that had more than doubled in size as her thighs trembled on either side of my head with each fresh wave of pleasure.
When she finally sunk back down to the bed with a sweet sigh, I wiped my hand over my mouth and surged up over her. “I don’t have a condom,” I said, staring down into her glassy gaze. “I’m okay just doing that all night.”
The serenest of smiles slid languidly across her pretty mouth. “I have one in the pocket of my pajama shorts.”