18. Chase
Chase
Five games into pre-season and it’s the first away game the girls haven’t traveled with me. And I don’t like it.
Gem is here too, so the fact they’re not at home with her is more unsettling.
Although they’re staying with Pa, Oakley’s grandfather, who has adopted my sisters as his own grandchildren with open arms, I can’t shake the worry.
Except I need to concentrate; this game is tight. Thankfully we’re holding. Playing well. Even with the small section of crowd booing us at every opportunity—especially when I stop a puck—as a team, our focus is solid.
For the most part I’ve managed to push my concern for the girls aside. I’m not going to lie, it’s tough to travel without them and not worry, tougher than I thought it would be, but I do it because there’s no other choice. And I need—the team needs—my head in the game one hundred percent of the time.
But when I barely clip a puck edge enough to divert its trajectory, I realize I’ve let my mind wander. Again.
Refocusing on the players zipping around me, the puck whizzing over the ice away from me, I think of nothing but what I need to do to guard my house.
We’re up by one and I refuse to be the man who changes that score. The only change I’ll accept is an uptick in our goal count.
Magnus Lund skates past, one eyebrow raised beneath his furrowed brow. I know what he’s asking, he’s worried my head isn’t in the game. I give him a nod and his face smooths out before he offers me a smile then turns to watch the play happening down ice.
Our front line has the puck up by Detroit’s goal and I can see the move before it happens. I’ve watched them do it multiple times during practice.
Bran takes the puck up the right side, but not all the way even though he’s got the space. In a quick flick, he passes it off to Bex who appears to line up a shot at goal but sends it across the goal to Mikkel Vinter instead.
And Vin sends that black disc straight through the Detroit goalie’s legs.
The goal light flashes, the buzzer sounds, and the crowd behind me boos, but the Rogues fans spread out through Detroit’s arena drown them out with their cheers and applause.
A minute later, the horn sounds ending any hope of Detroit catching us, and we put another win in our pockets.
Everyone is jubilant, our spirits high as we leave the ice and head for the visitors’ locker room.
I’m not expecting to see Gem—she usually waits until after the team is showered and changed before making an appearance, and it doesn’t take a genius to work out something is wrong.
I’m just not sure if it has to do with the girls or something else. And I can’t ask. If she doesn’t single me out, which she doesn’t do without at least one of the girls with her, I can’t do more than tip my chin in acknowledgment. Hope she sees the concern in my eyes.
Making a beeline for Walker, she leans in to whisper in his ear and my curiosity and concern increase. She’s only in the locker room a minute more. Just long enough to call out a congrats to the team before slipping out the door.
The churning in my gut is at vomit level now. Gem looked angry, but I could see the underlying distress and it takes everything in me to follow my normal after-game routine instead of following her.
My concern has me rushing through my strip down and shower. Once I’m in my suit, I shove my stuff in my bag and leave it for the equipment team to collect and load on the bus.
I’m out of the locker room, checking both directions of the hallway trying to decide which way to go when Walker comes out behind me.
“The bus is waiting if you’re ready to head out.”
I raise a brow. He doesn’t get the hint, so I ask, “Which way? This isn’t our arena, and I didn’t take notice of how we got to the locker room when we arrived.”
“Oh, right. I forget some of you don’t know the arenas like I do. That way.” He points right. “Turn left at the end, you’ll see a couple of security guards by the exit door. Bus is right outside in the parking lot.”
“Okay. Thanks.” I start off, pulling my phone from my pocket as I go, but there aren’t any missed calls or messages.
Either from Gem or the twins.
That eases some of my worry but not much. The more I think about it, the more I don’t like Gem’s demeanor.
I’m sure to anyone else she would have appeared her normal self. But I’ve been making a study of Gem’s expressions. She fascinates me. Yes, some of that is I’m attracted to her, but who the hell wouldn’t be?
She’s hot as fuck with her non-nonsense buttoned-up businesswoman look and attitude.
Except my fascination runs deeper than her looks and work persona. She’s so different at home, with the girls, with me. And the few glimpses I’ve had of her with her fellow team owners and their partners have been enlightening too.
She comes off as brisk and unapproachable, the unbending in-charge leader of many, but there’s this soft underbelly. One she doesn’t expose to anyone but her closest circle.
And I’ve somehow found myself inside that circle.
I want to stay in it more than anything. Which is why I’ve been extra careful when we interact at work. The last thing I want to do is compromise her in any way.
Stepping out into the night, I scan the area to see if I can locate her. There’s no sign of her or anyone else except the bus driver and a couple of security guards.
Nodding at them as I pass, I board the bus and head for the back. I want to put off having someone sit next to me as long as possible. I need to message Gem and don’t need anyone looking over my shoulder when I do it.
Hey. Everything okay?
It takes almost a minute for the bubbles to appear in our text thread. And I hold my breath waiting for her words to appear.
Yes. I need to go to Atlanta in the morning. I’m making sure the girls are covered just in case I can’t get back by tomorrow night.
Atlanta? What the hell? I don’t get a chance to ask why—and really, do I have the right to ask?—when another text pops up.
He who shall not be named is causing trouble at one of my family’s companies. I need to sort it out in person.
My fists clench and my gut cramps. I thought she was free of him. Then again, she did warn me he probably wouldn’t leave her alone once their divorce was final.
Which it is. The court signed off, or stamped, or whatever it is it has to do, weeks ago. If we’d done as Gem suggested I’d get off this bus and find her, tell her I’ll be beside her for the trip to Atlanta.
But we’re not married. And I have the girls to think about. It might feel like I should support Gem like a partner would, but we only live under the same roof, share the care of my sisters. We’re not together.
And I don’t know how she’d feel if I went all caveman and beat the shit out of her ex.
“Hey.” Casio Lindberg drops into the seat next to me.
I glance around, see only a few other guys have boarded the bus and wonder why he’s chosen to sit beside me. I don’t have to wait long to find out.
“Can I ask you something?”
Putting my phone away, I turn to look at him. “Sure.”
“How do you leave your sisters behind?”
I laugh. “Not easily. And this trip is the first. They’ve been at all our other away games.”
“Hmm…”
“Why do you ask?”
With a sigh, he rubs a hand over his face. “I have a sister. She’s six.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, not something I talk about much. She’s the product of my old man having an affair. My mother acts like Bella doesn’t exist and since my dad is dead, she only has me and her mother.”
“And you’re involved in her life?” I’m not sure why Casio has decided to confide in me but I’m not about to shut him down. I wish I’d had someone to talk to when I’d gotten guardianship of my sisters.
“I am. Was.” He blows out another breath. “Her mom wouldn’t move with me. I’ve offered to support her and Bella, but she refuses. Fuck, my old man never gave her anything but sperm, so I get why she doesn’t want me helping her.”
“But she’s let you spend time with your sister?”
“Oh, yeah, she’s all about that.”
“What’s the age difference?”
“Twenty-four years.”
“You could be her dad.”
“Same as you and yours.” He eyes me. “The baby could be yours.”
“She could.” A lightbulb lights up in my brain. “Ah, that’s why you’re talking to me about this.”
“Yes. I figured you’d have some insight in how to cope with being away from her. We FaceTime and any break I get, I fly to New York to see her.”
“Did you want to come to Baton Rouge?”
“No. And I want out as soon as I can.” He shakes his head. “No, I’m not going to play shit to make them dump me.”
“Never even thought that. Why the hell would you think it?”
“I didn’t. Someone on my old team told me to do it so I can get back to New York.”
“You came from the Knights, right?” At his nod I say, “So you played with Coach.”
“I did. The man was a genius on the ice. He’s one off it. I loved playing with him, love working under his guidance too, but…”
“You miss your sister.”
He nods.
“And her mom won’t move here?”
“No. She’s got a good job, with benefits, and she’s worked her way to where she is without help. Although, once I knew about Bella, I’ve been making sure neither of them go without. I even bought an apartment, wanted to give it to her but she refused.” He snorts. “She pays me market rent on the damn thing.”
“You don’t need the money.”
“I don’t. That’s why I’m funneling it into an account for Bella’s future. Or a rainy day if something goes wrong.”
“Sounds like you’ve got it all worked out. Except living close.”
“Yep.” He leans into the aisle before turning back and lowering his voice. “I want a trade. I might have someone willing to swap but we haven’t spoken to anyone about it. You’re close with the GM, right?”
“Ah… She’s helping me with my sisters.” I don’t elaborate. And it’s ridiculous to deny because everyone has seen Gem with the girls. Mainly Candace.
“Do you think she’d listen if I could convince the guy from New York to trade places? Our positions are the same, deals similar, and I’d take a cut to go back home.”
“Shit, man, you need to talk to someone about this. I think Gem would be open to the suggestion, but it can’t be a simple swap. The New York GM would have to agree.”
“I know, I know.” He shakes his head. “I’m just testing the scenario.”
“Casio. If you hate it here that?—”
“Don’t hate it. Kinda love it actually. But I feel guilty about that too.”
“Look, I’m cool with talking to you about this, but I think you need someone who can help fix the situation. And that isn’t me.”
“I get it. I just wondered how you deal with being away from your sisters. Didn’t mean to dump all that on you. Sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. I’m happy to talk. Whenever you want or need.”
“Thanks.”
“I mean it, talk to Coach or even Gem. What does your agent say?”
He snorts. “He thinks I’m an idiot for wanting to go back. New York is still struggling after the drama from last season.”
“That was bad.” I’d spent a few weeks refreshing my knowledge of the league after arriving in Baton Rouge and read all about the ex-husband of the owner taking her to court to try and wrestle the team from her.
“It looked bad from the outside, the inside was a little easier, but still not good for the players.”
“Explains how you ended up at the bottom of the standings when the year before you almost made it to the cup.”
“Losing Walker didn’t help. And I don’t know what happened, but Landon Watts wasn’t playing at his best.”
“They’re looking good this year though.”
“They are. But then so are we.” He grins. “I might want to live in New York, but I want to play for the Rogues. I think we’re going all the way this year.”
“It’s our first season.”
“Wouldn’t matter if it was our tenth. The team is playing fantastic hockey.”
I shake my head. “And you want to leave that?”
“No. Not really. But Bella is more important than a career that’s going to be over in a few years.”
“Would you retire early?”
“No. Although I have thought about it.”
“Maybe play this season out and see how you feel then.”
“If I can’t get traded, that’s the plan.”
“I wish I could do more. Be more than just a guy you can talk to.”
“You and me both, but getting traded is a given in this job, right? And I know how lucky I was the last eight years. I played for one other team before the Knights, and that was only one season my first year out of college. And Bella wasn’t around then.”
“Would her mom be open to coming down here for visits or does her job make that difficult?”
“I don’t know. I kinda lost it on her when she wouldn’t move here when I suggested it. We haven’t really spoken since.”
“Sounds like you’ve got some apologizing to do.”
“Yeah, I guess I should start with that.”
“Moving back might not be the best thing if you’re fighting with Bella’s mom.”
“Probably. Maybe some time without me there will show her they need me.”
“They?”
“Ah, yeah, I might have a thing for my father’s one-night-stand baby momma.”
I can’t hold in my laughter.
“Yeah, I know, laugh it up. I’d laugh too if I wasn’t living it.”
When I get myself under control I ask, “Does she know you have a thing for her?”
“No. I can’t see how we could be together with the connection we have. And my mother would never speak to me. Then again, that might not be so bad.”
“Are you living in a soap opera?” I grin. “I swear, you’re reading the script for one of those daytime shows.”
“It feels like it. Unfortunately, I have the hots for my sister’s mom.”
“Ah, maybe don’t say it like that. It’s sounds super seedy, like a porno script, when you put it like that.”
For a second Casio looks confused and I’m about to explain it when he says, “Holy fuck! No! That’s not what I mean.”
By the time he finishes talking I’m laughing, and he quickly joins in.
“Oh God.” He chokes on a laugh. “That would really be a fucked-up life.”
“It would. Maybe lead with her being your half -sister’s mom before you tell people you have the hots for her.”
“I don’t know if I’ll tell anyone else. Not sure why I told you.”
“I’ll pretend I never heard it.”
“Thanks. And thanks for listening.”
“Any time.”
“You having a drink with us when we get to the hotel? I heard talk of them opening the bar just for us.”
“Probably. It’s too late to call my sisters.” I spoke to the girls before the game and even though I worry about them, I know they’re in good hands with Pa.
Besides, having a drink will mean a chance to see Gem. Maybe get a few words with her before going back to my room—Baton Rouge—without her.
The thought of letting her deal with her ex by herself has my chest tightening. I know she’s capable, but it doesn’t sit right letting her. Everything in me wants to help her, protect her.
It seems Casio isn’t the only one with a thing for a woman he shouldn’t.