Chapter Thirteen #2
But at twenty-one? There’re no age restrictions left.
You’re expected to be a grown-up and get your life on track.
Which, at that point, I did not. I had no plans after university, and it was making me skittish.
Adam had a job lined up. He had plans to move to London.
I still wasn’t sure what I wanted to do at all.
Painting my canvasses full-time certainly wasn’t a career option when I had no customers.
At around twenty to midnight, a wrench of panic rolled through me. I often wondered if other people saw their birthdays in like I did, or if this was particularly unique. Counting down to being another year older felt somewhat intense whilst others just went to bed and woke up a new age.
I tried to shake out my limbs. Take another sip of my drink. Nothing helped me rid of the sensation.
I crept out of the kitchen, leaving Adam chewing the ear off one of Sam’s friends about the economic climate, and decided to use the downstairs office for a moment’s calmness.
Nobody used it since their dad left. It was at the front of the house and Mandy had started hanging clothes in there to dry.
I opened the door and flicked the light on, only to realise I’d walked in on a private moment. A looming figure curved over a petite, brunette, his hands in her hair, her leg hitched over his hip.
The girl gasped, shifting away from him and turning her back on me. Whilst the man peeled himself off her to glare in my direction.
“Do you mind?” the girl hissed, not evening looking my way, as I latched eyes with him.
Freddie…
It was like a shot to the heart. Fuck, I mean I had zero claim on this man. He was Sam’s older brother. I didn’t even want him. My boyfriend was literally next door, but I gasped nonetheless and stumbled back out of the room.
“Hattie…” His voice sounded from behind the door. I’d left the light on, so he was probably annoyed. I flitted back through the hall and into the kitchen, taking my seat beside Adam.
“Hey, you,” he said, wrapping an arm around my waist. Sam caught my expression and frowned at me.
He mouthed, “You ok?”
I nodded but he continued to frown which meant I was completely unconvincing, and my pale skin was giving me away.
Sara leant across to confirm this. “You’re wearing it on your sleeve.”
“What’s on your sleeve?” Adam asked, inspecting.
I shrugged. “Nothing. Ignore her.”
“One minute, Hattie,” Sam said, pointing to the clock on the kitchen wall.
Ugh. My heart would not settle. What on earth had gotten into me?
“Thirty seconds!”
I took a deep breath as Sara topped my glass up from the magnum, spilling it all over the table. I used paper napkins to mop it up.
“Ten! Nine!”
Just as the countdown begun, Freddie appeared in the doorframe to the kitchen, his eyes grazing over me as I forced a smile and a laugh. What was even wrong with me? Why was I so bothered about catching him kissing another girl? And where the hell had she gone?
“Four! Three! Two! One! HAPPY NEW YEAR!” Sam yelled, throwing his arms in the air for a big round of cheers. “And now for the most important part! Happy birthday to you…”
I cringed as I always did when they all sung to me.
I both hated it with every fibre of my being and couldn’t live without it.
Once they’d finished singing, Adam kissed me in front of the whole room to more cheering.
Freddie hadn’t moved an inch. He wasn’t really taking part in the merriment, but he was there all the same.
“Hattie, here,” Sam said, passing me a small, wrapped box. “Where’s mine?”
“Ok, rude.” I laughed but fished his tiny present out of my back pocket.
Sam had gotten me an AC/DC tape to go in my ancient little car.
Whereas I’d gotten Sam a bright-pink and furry thong with Alice embroidered along the back. He nearly fell over laughing.
“PUT IT ON! PUT IT ON!” Sara began to chant as Alice helped Sam pull down his trousers.
“NO! Oh my God! My eyes,” I squealed. Adam squeezed me into him, pretending to hide me from the horrors of Sam’s naked butt. “It wasn’t for show and tell!”
But Sam danced around in it anyway with Alice proudly snapping photos of his goofy arse.
An hour later, as sleepiness came over the guests in that way it does on New Year, people started to leave. I grabbed the duvet from the cupboard upstairs that Mandy had prepared for me and Adam, so we could sleep on the sofa, when Freddie stuck his head out of his bedroom door.
“Hey, happy birthday,” he said, his expression cautious. “Sorry about earlier.”
“Which part?”
He pressed his lips together. “Erm. The office…”
“I don’t know why you’re apologising. You’ve not done anything wrong.”
“Well… You seemed pretty startled.”
“Yeah. Sorry I interrupted. I didn’t expect anyone to be in there.” I swear my heart was beating loud enough to hear.
He shook his head. “I’m sorry too, but not for the reason you’re thinking.”
I hugged the duvet to my chest, taking a step towards the stairs. “What am I thinking?”
He shrugged, his eyes watching me warily. “You’re probably thinking I’m annoyed. But really, I’m pretty sure it’s the same thing I think whenever the tables are turned.”
I swallowed, unsure what to say. Did he mean when I kissed Adam?
But he never expanded on it. And I wasn’t ready to ask.
“Goodnight, Hattie,” he said, before turning back into his dark room. From what I could tell, there was nobody else in there with him.