Chapter Nineteen
Ian
T he football game is about to go into halftime when I realize Kami isn’t sitting with us. Looking around the living room, I discover both her and her mom are gone. Is everything okay?
I look to the kitchen and see both women in deep conversation. Kami looks frustrated while her mom is speaking.
Kami hasn’t been herself since we first arrived.
From the moment we stepped into this house, Kami has been quiet, stiff, and seemingly on guard. I wonder if it has anything to do with John. Since meeting the guy, I’ve found him to be smart, fun to be around, and from what I can tell, very attentive and caring to Maria. Does Kami see things differently? If so, what does she see, and why? Why is Kami seemingly convinced her mom’s decisions affect her, too?
She’s a grown woman. She can do whatever she wants .
At some point, Kami’s facial expression transitions into one of defeat as she takes what looks like a large gulp of wine.
Yep, clearly that conversation didn’t go the way she wanted it to. I may not have heard what was said, but anyone could read between the lines since Kami wears her emotions on her face.
A few moments pass before she tears her gaze away, and we lock stares on each other. She must be thinking I’ve seen everything because then she says something to her mom, grabs her wineglass, and walks off.
An hour later, we all say good night, and I follow Kami into what looks like her childhood bedroom. The room is neat and simple as accents of white, gray, orange, and yellow are splashed throughout.
“You have a nice room,” I compliment as I close the door behind me.
“Thanks.” She heads straight for her suitcase in the corner and starts to unpack. “I’ll take the bed, and you can take the floor.”
“You sure? You don’t think your family will come in unannounced at some point?”
She puts her hands on her hips. “Just because we’re pretending for my family doesn’t mean we have to pretend in private, too. Besides, I have a lock on my door.”
The lock may help with keeping people from walking in, but it certainly won’t help my back. “Why not put a divider in the middle of the bed? This way you have your personal space, we can both get a good night’s rest, and no one has to know.”
I don’t like the idea of pillows standing between me and her, but it’s either this or the floor. Maybe later on, I can convince her to bring down both the pillow and her own wall.
She looks down at the shaggy carpet under our feet, then back up to me. “Just stay on your side. Okay?”
I nod. “Are you okay? I saw you talking to your mom in the kitchen. You seemed…upset.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” The fact that she won’t look at me tells me a lot.
“Kami, since we got here, you haven’t been yourself. I’m not saying these things to attack you. I’m saying them because I’ve noticed.”
She pauses, then shakes her head. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“Maybe not, but maybe you can try to explain it to me. I’ve found talking about your issues is way better than bottling them all in.”
“Even if I told you, you wouldn’t get it.”
“Then why don’t we start with something simple. What was the argument with your mom about?”
She sighs. “It’s complicated.”
I shrug. “We’ve got all night to uncomplicate it.”
Her expression softens. “Thanks, but really, I’m okay. I’m figuring it out as I go. I’m just…tired. And it’s late.”
“Okay. The offer still stands, though. Just let me know if you ever need an ear.” I’ll ask her again at a later time then.
She nods, grabbing her toiletries, a pair of black sweatpants, and a pink tank top, before walking into the bathroom.
Heaving a deep sigh, I grab one of the large decorative pillows and anchor it in the middle of the bed. After that, I step into comfy clothes.
Kami said something prior to coming here about her mom’s dating life. What if that argument was about Maria’s relationship with John? Probably so, but this seems to be a much deeper issue than just him.
Half an hour later, Kami and I lie on opposite sides of the bed. I can’t see her, and she can’t see me. I can feel her lying there, yet she’s so still. Is she asleep? Awake? Not knowing what she’s doing—even though, technically, she’s lying right next to me—is killing me.
Unable to fall asleep right away, I lie on my back, staring up at the ceiling. I want to help Kami, comfort her. But I can’t. Not until she’s ready to let me in. It’s obvious she’s emotionally struggling, but this might be something she needs to figure out on her own.
My job is to play boyfriend, not to fix her.
But at the same time, I can’t sit on my hands and watch her emotionally struggle.