Chapter 18
CHAPTER 18
On this particular Taco Tuesday, neither Haleigh nor Jack felt like cooking, so he was grabbing their favorites from Something to Taco About on his way home from work.
Haleigh headed over to his house early to let Twinkie out. It was one of those random warm days that always happened in February, and she could have stood on the deck forever, watching the sun disappear below the horizon and cast ribbons of sorbet-colored light across the clouds.
“We should eat out here tonight,” she suggested to the rottweiler. Twinkie was too busy burying one of his favorite toys in the dirt to respond. Haleigh left him to his task and wandered back inside.
Halfway to the kitchen she stopped short, her eyes catching on the wall of bookcases in the formal den. Jack had let her organize them by color a few months ago, but now they were alphabetized and separated by hardcover and paperback.
She peeked into his bedroom next. The space was always neat, but now it was hospital levels of clean. No old water glasses on the nightstand. Not a speck of dust on the bureau. When she opened the closet, his clothes were hanging pin-straight, every piece ironed and color-coordinated.
The kitchen was the same. The food in the cabinets and pantry were ordered by alphabet and height, and, Haleigh was pretty sure, by what aisle they were found in at the grocery store.
Her heart pushed into her throat. This must have taken him hours to do. Maybe days. How had she not noticed this last week? How bad were things at work? And why was he hiding it from her?
She got plates and silverware and threw together two quick-and-cheap margaritas (i.e., premade mix plus tequila plus ice, and stirred with a spoon).
Back on the deck, she curled up on the outdoor sofa in front of the small fire pit to wait for Jack. When he got home, Twinkie’s barking led him to the backyard.
“Eating alfresco tonight?” He smiled. His eyes were bright, but all Haleigh could see were the dark circles under them.
“Are you okay? I saw… the house,” she added softly. It seemed like lately Taco Tuesdays had also become nights for Serious Talks.
He shrugged. “I did a little cleaning.”
“At four A.M .?”
“It helps me sleep.”
Haleigh took the bag of food from his hands and stared at him. He’d start talking eventually. He always did.
It didn’t even take three minutes. “Work’s a fucking mess. Someone accidentally inverted codes on a bunch of forms and people were calling crying because they were being denied for procedures they needed.” He blew out a breath.
“Shit,” Haleigh mumbled.
“It took Dylan and me days to fix it.” At that name, Haleigh’s heart stammered. Jack barely ever even mentioned his other coworkers, but Dylan seemed to come up a lot lately. She was clearly on his mind. Did they hang out outside of work? Had she been here? Haleigh knew it wasn’t her place to care ( no being jealous assholes ), but that didn’t stop her chest from twinging. Her hands were shaking enough that she had to shove them under her legs.
“We’re all good now,” he went on. “But what if someone gets sicker or dies or something because of the delays?” The fingers of his free hand drummed his knee.
Haleigh could see the weight of those worries crushing him. “You should talk to your therapist about it.”
“Nah. We’re working on other stuff.”
Reaching over her, he retrieved the takeout bag from the floor. His body was warm against Haleigh’s legs, and his soapy scent filled her senses. It was all so familiar. So Jack. It made her want to believe him that he was fine. But the house and the exhaustion on his face were hard to shake. They told a different story.
“Jack.”
“It’s all fine. And I’ll be fine. I just need a little rest.” He pulled the table forward and set her tacos in front of her. “Now, didn’t you go on a date last night?”
Haleigh couldn’t fight her smile. “Yeah.”
“And you didn’t text me about it?”
“There were no oysters or cockatoos.” It was a new feeling for Haleigh to be sitting with Jack and yet her heart was thumping at the thought of someone else.
This was exactly what she needed to protect their friendship. The rules and this fluttering in her center that had nothing to do with him.
Jack sat back. “Wait, was it good?”
Haleigh had raised her margarita to her mouth to take a sip, and nodding, she smiled around the rim. “Stanton wasn’t bluffing at dinner.”
“Clearly I need to hear about this.”
God, Haleigh wanted to tell him. Stanton was away scouting locations for his show, and while her mom was thrilled she’d had fun, Haleigh couldn’t really debrief a date with her that way. It might give her mother another heart attack.
But she wouldn’t put herself before Jack. Not until she felt certain he was truly okay. She said his name again, more seriously this time.
“Haleigh.” His brown eyes pierced her gaze. “I need to not think about work for a while, okay? I promise, if I don’t have things under control, you’ll be the second to know after my therapist.” He took a long sip of his drink. “For now, please humor me. Tell me something good.”
With a sigh, she gave in. “His name’s Brian. He owns Sundae’s Sanctuary with Logan.” Haleigh recapped the whole night, from Brian ordering half the menu to how easily they laughed together, and how he hadn’t been the least bit bothered by Haleigh’s inability to use chopsticks. “I’m pretty sure I launched at least three different kinds of food at him.”
Jack was laughing in all the right places, once almost choking on a bite of his taco, but something was off. The light didn’t quite reach his eyes.
“What?” she pressed.
He shook his head, and his brow smoothed over. “Nothing. I’m just trying to picture you starting a food fight at the dumpling place.”
Haleigh balled up a napkin and tossed it at his head. “Chopsticks are hard if you aren’t used to them, and they literally had no forks.”
“I’m sure you threw food at him very gracefully.”
Haleigh flung another napkin, but at this point the laugh she was trying to swallow had bubbled over. “I was a ballerina. A food ballerina. It floated across the air before smacking him in the head and chest.”
Jack couldn’t contain his laughter either. “No wonder he wants a second date. Who could resist?”
She squared her shoulders exaggeratedly, tipping her chin up with all the confidence in the world. “Who indeed?”
Those beautiful bronze-brown eyes of his narrowed deviously, and, for a second, he rubbed at the stubble of his chin like a cartoon villain. (He truly was such a dork in all the best ways.) “I guess Stanton is giving me some competition now, huh?”
This man could turn breathing into a competitive sport. “You know I’m the only one who is supposed to win here, right?” Haleigh stated.
He laughed. “But when you’re happy, I’m happy. So I win too.”
Something heavy settled between them, subtext that Haleigh was afraid to poke at. She took a giant bite of her last chicken taco instead.
Jack seemed to sense it too. “Besides, it’s time someone appreciated you for all your excellent qualities. Like never failing to drip salsa on your shirt when eating Mexican food.”
Haleigh glanced down at her chest. Damnit. There was a dark red dribble, speckled with tomato and onion chunks, streaking the front of her favorite baby-pink sweatshirt. She really needed to stop wearing light colors around tomato products.
Swiping at the stain, she glared at him like he’d put it there.
“Or your inability to ever spell the word ‘sophisticated’ correctly, even with spell-check.”
Haleigh kicked him gently. “That word should have more O s in it.”
Jack took another swig from his margarita. “Or how you tend to forget the mixed part of the mixed drinks.”
“It’s in there.” Haleigh pouted to fight off a smile. “Plus, the mixer just slows you down.” She grabbed a small handful of chips (forgoing the salsa for the sake of her sweatshirt). “What about how I always look up if the animal dies in movies and shows so you don’t get traumatized?”
“That’s not a joke,” Jack said, his voice softer than the breeze playing through Haleigh’s loose hair. “That’s who you are. You can just… I don’t know… sense what hurts people and you do your best to protect them from it.”
Haleigh scrubbed at her face with her palms. She’d never thought of herself like that. In her mind, she was too busy comparing herself to everyone else and fearing she came up short.
She scooted a little farther down the couch, feigning stiff legs. But really she needed some distance from Jack’s tenderness.
Something passed across his face at the space between them. Before Haleigh could decipher it, his sly grin took its place. “Is he prepared for Christine in party mode? He’s going to have to dance with her at least three times. And find all her drinks when she sets them down and inevitably can’t remember where they are.”
Haleigh tapped his thigh lightly with her foot. “Okay, you went to two weddings with me and now you think you’re an expert on Berkshire decorum.”
“And Roger. Is this guy ready to hear about the war all night?”
“Stop. It’s been one date. I haven’t made any decisions about that plus-one yet.” Haleigh shot him a superior look. “Besides, who says I still don’t want to go alone.”
The party was looming closer. Joey had started texting about menus and dress shopping, and her mom was talking about booking a block of rooms. But Haleigh wasn’t ready to put that kind of pressure on her and Brian.
For now, she’d had one great date. And that was more than she’d had in a very long time.