Chapter 19 #2
And then she broke off, sailing into new waters, where the panic passed into peace. Her body climaxed and then went limp as her muscles all decided to quit on her, pleasure melting her into some newer, softer form.
Struan held her against him, his hand stopping, though he kept it where it was, cupping her gently.
“Ellie?” he asked after a moment. “How do you feel?”
She smiled into the darkness. “Like you meant me to feel. Wonderful.”
“Lie back,” he said, turning her around so her back settled against the mattress. “Christ, you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
She warmed at his words, at the raw honesty in them. “Do you like looking at me?”
In answer, he moved enough so she could feel his erection against her thigh. “What do you think?”
Then before she could ask what was next, he nudged her legs apart with his knee, and his right hand returned to her sex. But this time he slid a long finger all the way inside her, and she learned that she barely understood her own body. But he did.
Ellie cried out and arched her back as another intense wave of pleasure hit her. He laughed softly and proceeded to tease her until a second orgasm took her and her limbs had turned watery.
Unconsciously, she reached for him.
“No,” he told her sharply.
“But I need to hold something after what you did to me. Twice.”
“Hold the bedposts,” he ordered. “And hold tight, because I aim to do it again.”
“Do you?”
He moved to place himself above her, his erection pushing against the damp folds of her body, eager to enter her. “Ellie, it’s time. If you’ll let me.”
There was a warning in his voice, but she just nodded. This was what she asked for. Begged for.
“I’m yours,” she told him.
She waited for the intrusion, but instead she felt his lips on her own, a kiss that tangled need and gentleness until she was dizzy.
“Struan,” she whispered when she took a ragged breath. “Please don’t wait any longer.”
“I don’t think I could,” he admitted wryly. Then he added, “It may hurt. That’s not my intent.”
“I know.” Lord, how could he think that she was worried about that, after the way he’d pleasured her?
He once again settled between her legs, which she spread as far as she was able to accommodate his huge frame. He pushed into her, the slickness from her previous orgasms making his entry smooth.
She moaned at the sensation of being filled like this, of taking this man into her body, an intimacy that all her imaginings could not prepare her for. He was hot and hard and huge—was this the real reason he’d kept her sightless, to not scare her with his size?
Still he pushed, and pushed. She wriggled, tilting her hips, trying to hold him but also flying apart with every minute shift of him inside.
“Struan?” she asked, not even sure what she was asking.
“You’re doing well, darling,” he told her, his own voice tight with effort. “You feel so goddamned good….”
And then he stopped, his body joined to hers. She inhaled once, twice.
“That’s it. Relax. Do you hurt?”
“I don’t think so,” she breathed out. “Is this it? Is this what you wanted?”
“Not remotely.” She heard the smile in his tone—dear God, the joy of hearing him sound happy!—and then he began to move.
His thrusts were slow, an in-and-out that was a gentle rocking more than anything else.
Pleasure exploded in her, as parts of her body never before touched in such a way were caressed, teased, explored.
She wanted nothing more than to have this last forever, and she ached to grab him by the shoulders and hold him tight to her.
“Struan, I’m not touching you,” she moaned, turning her head to the side in her distress. “But I want to. I want to hold you so close.”
“You’re a marvel,” he told her, his breath hot and desperate. “I’ll hold you, darling.”
And his hands came to her hips, guiding her movements as he timed his thrusts to bring her to another peak. She cried out his name, and he went stiff.
She felt the moment he finished inside her, a pulse of heat and the sense that things would never be the same for her, and she gripped the bedpost so hard she could feel the wood grain marking her palms.
Struan withdrew, and fell onto his back beside her, his breath still rapid. His hand covered her own, prying her from the post. Then they lay side by side, their hands clasped in the space between. Belatedly, she let her free hand settle on her belly.
Elspeth waited until her heartbeat slowed. Struan didn’t seem to want to speak, so she’d have to. “I wouldn’t mind doing this again.”
Struan exhaled next to her. “I’m glad to hear it. A woman may not conceive after just once. Usually not.”
“But I could be with child after tonight?”
“It’s possible,” he said.
“I hope so.”
“I thought you were open to the idea of repeating the act?” Now he sounded a little disappointed.
She laughed. “It’s not that. I meant that if I carry a child, then you’ll be happy with me.”
“Elspeth, I’m already happy with you. You’re better than I deserve.”
“I wish I could see you,” she said.
“Christ. I forgot about that.” He sat up, and pulled the sheet around them both. He leaned over and slipped the blindfold off, the silk moving over her soft curls with no resistance. The room was even darker than before, the fire having subsided to almost nothing.
Ellie looked him full in the face and smiled. “Perhaps one night I’ll able to use my eyes…or my hands,” she suggested.
“Perhaps,” he said, not committing to anything. “But for now, you relax and then sleep.”
* * * *
Ellie woke up with a sigh of happiness. She’d done it.
She was properly a wife now, and it seemed that Struan’s facade was beginning to crack.
And really, it all had to be a facade. He treated her so tenderly last night, proving that his essential nature had to be much more gentle than what everyone assumed.
Certainly than what she had assumed. He’d cleaned her body with a cloth and warm water.
He’d tucked the blanket over her, he kissed her before telling her good night and leaving for his own room.
She wanted him to stay longer, but she also realized that pushing for too much too fast might spook him.
To think that she missed out on weeks of that particular pleasure, simply because she hadn’t been bold enough to ask and he’d been overly careful of her feelings to press the matter.
But now…she bit her lip as she recalled the absolute bliss she’d experienced the night before.
Struan’s hands on her skin, his mouth on her body, and the unique joy of having him inside her…
The only thing missing was a visual memory, denied by the blindfold.
Well, that wouldn’t last forever. And then she’d not just feel and hear and smell her husband, she’d see him too.