Command Log 1 Operation Debauchery
LUKE
The Millennihen Falcon
This is an outrage. It wasn’t enough that the Beakless Menace moved into MY home, and sleeps with MY Trixie every night.
Or that he hired men who make noise from sun up to sun down, making changes to enlarge Trixie’s coop to accommodate his giant featherless head.
Or that he collects my unborn children for his “Brake Fast”.
HE HAS KIDNAPPED TRIXIE.
SHE IS GONE FOREVER (It has been two days)
I AM ALONE (With my entire flock)
STARVING (Until the corngiver comes to feed me twice daily)
LEFT TO DEFEND MYSELF FROM THE ELEMENTS (Inside of my state-of-the-art chicken coop)
I demand that he return her at once before I stage a coop coup. I will attack him where it hurts. In particular his worm like toes and naked tail. He will know no peace.