Chapter 12
Gracie
The foggy mirror slowly cleared as I brushed out my hair, the yellow lighting of the motel bathroom making my skin look paler than usual. Or maybe it was just the restless, dream-filled sleep.
Either way, I felt a little shaky, and I was grateful my mates had packed so many comfortable options for me. I slipped into a cotton striped sundress and sneakers before leaving the bathroom, my toothbrush still in hand.
In the light of day, the motel room felt cozy.
I knew my mates weren’t particularly fond of it, mostly because of the dust, but the thin curtains let in the morning light in a way that brought the space to life.
Even the faded pictures on the far left wall stood out to me, a bustling city I’d never seen before shown in black-and-white.
“Feeling a bit better?” Thornar asked. He and Basir were sitting on one of the beds, papers and a tablet spread between them on the quilted duvet cover.
“Yes?” I said, not entirely sure. “I’m a bit hungry though.”
“We’re going to grab breakfast,” Ravik said, standing in the doorway of the room, the morning heat slipping past him. “They have a restaurant in the gas station.”
“Are you two hungry?” I looked over at Thornar and Basir. I was worried they weren’t taking care of themselves with all of our traveling.
Basir’s gaze held mine for only a second before returning to the papers. “Do you want us to come with you, glow?”
“I mean, I always want you two to come.”
Thornar chuckled, but the way he did—the heat in his gaze—made my cheeks warm. Obviously I knew why he was laughing—I’d heard many jokes along the same thread in the Cold Moon Pack. So why didn’t it bother me when Thornar did it? Why did I like it so much?
Basir shot him a look before he exhaled. “Maybe it’s better we finish our work here.”
I hesitated for half a second, worried he was still caught on the events of last night, but Thornar didn’t linger. He was already moving things along.
“That’s the spirit.” Thornar flashed a smile to him before looking over at me. “Thanks for thinking of us though, little flame.”
“Come on.” Ravik smoothed a hand over my back as I turned toward him. He looked particularly handsome today. The tight short sleeve shirt he wore was more casual than normal, and it also showed off so many of his muscles.
I wasn’t entirely sure how it was fair for one person to have that many.
When we stepped into the sunlight, I lifted a hand to shield my eyes. Ravik grumbled before tucking me into his side, shielding me in his shadow as he guided us forward. I found a laugh slipping from my lips, and he paused to look at me while arching a brow.
“It’s just sunlight,” I teased. “I promise I’m fine.”
“If it’s hurting you, I’m not a fan,” Ravik said, pressing a finger under my chin. “But I love seeing you smile, lux mea. I need to see it more.”
“I feel like I’m finally getting the chance to,” I admitted. “Mostly because of the three of you.”
Was that too blunt? Maybe, but the way his eyes warmed made it worth it.
“Its also because of us that you didn’t sleep well last night,” he murmured, drawing me to his side again as we continued toward the gas station restaurant.
“Maybe because of our bond,” I admitted. “But that was all Nyxarra…and the other gods.”
I didn’t say either of their names. My dreams last night had featured them, and though I didn’t have a visual, both Nyxarra and their power had grown to feel so much more solid and real. As if giving them names and a history had made my connection to them feel that much more tangible.
At some point in the night, a painful pulse had torn through my chest, like something had grabbed hold of our mate bond and yanked. I shot up in bed, the movement echoed by my mates.
Ravik had already been sitting up, his knuckles white where he gripped the bed frame. Thornar had sworn under his breath, scanning the room, while Basir had gone completely still and alert in a way that felt almost eerie.
Even though I’d managed to fall back asleep at some point, my dreams had been filled with fragmented visions of Nyxarra trying to speak to me.
In between dreams, I’d heard my mates say the pull on our bond had to be connected to the god scar.
Either Nyxarra or one of the other gods had been trying to use it to communicate with us.
So sleep had been limited, to say the least.
“I know it may be a lot to ask,” Ravik said in a low tone, “but another one of those conversations would be appreciated.”
“One where Nyxarra explains a bunch of stuff?” I teased as he grunted in acknowledgment.
I didn’t disagree. More answers would be really nice.
But I also knew, considering I’d lived for so long without answers to anything, that I couldn’t expect that.
Thinking like that—always looking for a reason for something that happened in the past—made it hard to stay in the present.
And truthfully, I didn’t want to waste a moment with my mates.
Or appreciating this beautiful landscape.
“My wolf may hate this heat,” I told Ravik as we turned the corner of the motel block. “She wouldn’t shift even if I begged…but it is beautiful. In a different way.”
Very different from anywhere that I’d lived or visited before.
The motel almost blended into the desert, covered in dust and more than a little sun-bleached, but the flashing neon signs posted outside stood out even from the highway.
Maybe because it was such a bright signal against the endless stretch of brown.
I didn’t know how close the nearest town was, but I couldn’t see anything except open, heat-soaked land in every direction.
“This type of heat is dangerous,” Ravik said. “At least for wolves like us with thick fur adapted for living in a colder climate. I wouldn’t mind it in the dead of winter though.”
I tilted my head in thought as we entered the restaurant, a chime sounding above. “What is it like in Ironsun territory during the winter?”
“We’re fairly high in the mountains, so it’s cold, but depending on where you are in the territory, it can vary.
The west side is a lot warmer compared to the capital city.
” Ravik paused, worry filling our bond. “If you don’t end up loving the cold, we can always find places to visit during that time of year. ”
“I actually don’t mind the cold if I have somewhere warm to be inside, but I would love to see more of the territory before it gets too icy or snowy to travel. Especially some of the land we flew over on the way to Nightstar Flight territory.”
“We’ll do that before the weather gets too intense,” he agreed, squeezing my waist. Then he addressed the restaurant staff waiting at a small podium near the front. “Just a table for the two of us.”
It felt like a new world, simply going into a restaurant, so everything from the plastic-looking yellow booths to the scent of overcooked food in the air caught my attention.
The place was nearly empty, but the man happily led us to a small corner booth where I could sit next to Ravik, two plastic-covered menus with bright pictures set in front of us.
The sunny, worn-down restaurant felt simple compared to the chaos of the past few days, and I felt my chest loosen, some of the tension from last night’s dreams finally easing.
“What are you getting?” I asked Ravik, looking up to find his gaze already on me.
“A skillet,” he answered. “You should make sure to eat a lot—I have no idea what today will bring.”
“What territory is next?”
“Bloodrose Sloth territory—Alpha Lacey Harrison has responded already, welcoming us…” Ravik sighed. “Somewhat.”
“She doesn’t like us?”
“Not exactly. She just hates Alpha Kaliyah Greene, so she’ll probably try to convince us not to go there and make her help contingent on that point. Anything to get one up on her.”
“Couldn’t we use that against her?”
Ravik tilted his head curiously, and I continued. “If she doesn’t like her and always wants to get one up on her, she may be more willing to help…if she thinks Alpha Kaliyah already is.”
My mate’s smile was gorgeous as he surprised me, tilting my chin up and pressing a kiss to my lips. When I pulled back, my eyes went wide. “What was that for?”
“I’d never ask you to be interested in politics. Most don’t like it,” Ravik said, smoothing his finger over my lips. “But seeing you step into that role, especially as my mate…”
Oh.
I spoke honestly, despite feeling a hint of nerves. “I want to try to help. It’s a lot of…new experiences for me, but this sort of started with me. I don’t want to ignore the problem or avoid the best solution, even if it’s a big change.”
Ravik let out a hum of understanding. “Not just a big change, but a dangerous one. How do you feel about last night?”
I wasn’t surprised he was asking, and I wasn’t surprised he’d waited until we were alone. Ravik had a sharp instinct for how his words would affect the people around him. Like Basir and the guilt he carried over exposing me to violence.
Still, I hesitated. “Honestly?”
“Always.”
Right.
“I don’t feel anything but relief. I don’t think Basir did anything wrong…and there is relief in being protected like that.”
Ravik was quiet as I stared at the scratched table under my menu, finally asking, “Is that bad? Does that make me a bad person?”
It was a raw but simple question.
“No.”
His surety was a balm to the lingering sliver of doubt.
His words were clear as he held my gaze, offering steady reassurance.
“Wanting protection, wanting to survive—in whatever form that takes—is never wrong, and it’s never a weakness.
Our bond exists for a reason, lux mea, and one of them is for you to trust us to take care of you. For you to feel safe with us.”
“I do. I really do,” I said softly.
“Hi there!” A middle-aged woman approached us with a bright smile. “My name is Jessica, and I’ll be taking care of you today. What can I get you two?”
“Sausage skillet. Three of them, two to go,” Ravik said, then looked to me.
My eyes widened as they darted down to the menu, picking out the first thing I saw. “Blueberry pancakes would be amazing, thank you.”
“Coming right up.” Jessica’s gaze was warm, and she disappeared as quickly as she had arrived. I melted into Ravik’s side as he brushed his lips over the top of my head. The peaceful morning was exactly what I needed, especially knowing that all too soon we would be moving forward on our journey.
Ravik wasn’t wrong. There was danger ahead. But I’d survived worse alone, for nearly a decade. Now I had them.
And I wasn’t letting that go.