44. In the Cage
SOUNDTRACK: Shout by Sleeping Wolf
~ brIDGET ~
DeadGirlWalking: I’m not trying to entice you, Cain. But I have to tell you something. I changed my mind about changing my mind. I want you on the hunt. I want you coming for me. All the way. And if you won’t do it, I’m finding someone else.
DeadGirlWalking: This isn’t part of the game. I’m done.
---
I didn’t even wait to see if he’d respond.
Then I pulled up the forum again and made a new post in the playground.
---
[DeadGirlWalking has made a Post!]
I want to fight for my life… and lose.
---
My notifications and DMs lit up in seconds and I smiled grimly at the screen. I knew most of those messages would just be the idiots and trolls, either wanting to goad me, or watch.
I closed the forum and almost shut the computer down—nothing would disappear for another twenty-four hours. But even though my DM thread with Cain hadn’t lit up, I couldn’t deny the prickling sense that he was watching.
Out of morbid curiosity, I went back to the post and started scrolling through the comments. There were already dozens.
---
I’ll fill you up, then slit your throat, bitch.
-
OH NO, DON’T DO IT! YOUR LIFE IS WORTH SOMETHING!
-
God, another attention seeker. If you really wanted to die, you’d just do it without all the fanfare.
---
I rolled my eyes and was about to shut it down, but I’d already scrolled down when another comment caught my eye.
---
I already know how to make you come alive.
Link.
---
My heart began to slam against my ribs—my mind tripping back to the very first time Cain commented on my original post: I know how to make you feel alive.
It was him. It had to be.
But my pulse ratcheted even higher when I saw the two comments beneath Cain’s.
---
DM me.
-
I understand. Check out my gallery: Link.
---
With shaking hands I quickly clicked into the two new profiles and saved the links, took screenshots of the messages, then DMed the first guy nothing but a question mark, and the second guy a single line telling him I was going to look into it and get back to him.
Then I went back to Cain’s message.
I bit my lip, wondering whether he’d just repeated his earlier message to make a point, or if there was something deeper.
But when I clicked the link, it took me back to our DM thread.
How the hell had he done that?
---
***SYSTEM NOTE: CHAT ENCRYPTED END-TO-END. ENSURE ALL ACCOUNTS ARE LOGGED OFF BEFORE DISCONNECTING.***
DeadGirlWalking: Is this supposed to be funny?
---
I waited, heart pounding, but he never replied, and the message never said that he was typing.
I was groaning to myself for being hopeful and about to click out again when my computer pinged because the other guy had replied to my message. And the darkest part of me squeezed.
---
***SYSTEM NOTE: CHAT ENCRYPTED END-TO-END. ENSURE ALL ACCOUNTS ARE LOGGED OFF BEFORE DISCONNECTING.***
TheClowne: You for real?
DeadGirlWalking: Flesh and blood. And yes, I meant it.
TheClowne: What’s your timeframe?
DeadGirlWalking: Before Christmas. But the sooner the better if we match. I have some questions.
TheClowne: I’m sure you do. But that’s not how I play this game. Either you want help or you don’t. If you do, I’ll get there. If you don’t, we’re done here.
---
I frowned, uncertain whether to respond to that or not. I clicked through to the guy’s profile to see if I could get a read on what kind of person he was, but it was entirely blank, except for the date he’d joined—several years ago—and his name, he’d left everything empty.
I chewed my lip, debating whether to respond.
But then the computer pinged again.
---
TheClowne: You didn’t say you were working with Cain. I’m out.
[TheClowne has left the chat.]
---
What the fuck?!
Every piece of sadness, grief, and grim determination floating in my veins suddenly morphed into white-hot rage. I pounded the keyboard so hard my desk rattled.
---
***SYSTEM NOTE: CHAT ENCRYPTED END-TO-END. ENSURE ALL ACCOUNTS ARE LOGGED OFF BEFORE DISCONNECTING.***
DeadGirlWalking: What the fuck, Cain! You don’t want me, but you won’t let anyone else have me either? What the hell is wrong with you?!
SleepingBeast: We aren’t finished.
DeadGirlWalking: I told you I was looking elsewhere if you bailed and you fucking bailed!
SleepingBeast: I said, we aren’t finished.
DeadGirlWalking: You’re toying with me. This is a game for you, but it’s not for me. You can set all the rules you want, but I don’t get any? That’s bullshit, Cain. I’m done. I’m finished. I know what I want. Either you’re in or you’re out—and stay out of my fucking posts. I can talk to whoever the fuck I want!
SleepingBeast: You aren’t listening, I said: We. Aren’t. Finished.
I blinked and went still, breathing hard because I was furious, but a sudden wash of hope burned through me too.
DeadGirlWalking: Are you saying what I think you’re saying?
SleepingBeast: I’m saying what I already said: Soon.
DeadGirlWalking: What is “soon”? Soon is bullshit. I’ve got a priest out here getting ready to give up God for me, and you can’t even hunt?
SleepingBeast: You only told me you were back in the plan a few minutes ago. And for the record, that pussy would never give you what you want.
DeadGirlWalking: A) You never told me jack shit at any point, so who cares, and B) You don’t know him, so you don’t get an opinion.
SleepingBeast: I know enough.
DeadGirlWalking: Then you know that “pussy” has a dark side—and he’ll actually answer phone calls and TALK TO ME. Who knows maybe I’ll give up the darkness and become a preacher’s wife.
SleepingBeast: I didn’t think you were a liar. You and I both know you’d chew him up, spit him out, and be back in my pocket in days.
DeadGirlWalking: Being in your pocket has brought nothing. I thought we were connecting. I thought we had an agreement. Then you just ghosted.
SleepingBeast: You changed the rules.
DeadGirlWalking: And now I’m changing them back.
SleepingBeast: And maybe you’ve noticed that we’re talking?
---
I blinked.
He was right. He was here. He was messaging again.
Hope and thrill and fear and need all churned in my guts.
---
DeadGirlWalking: Whatever. I’m getting desperate. I can’t just sit here waiting. It’s driving me insane. Are you in? And are you in NOW? I need this. And I need it to be soon.
[SleepingBeast is typing…]
SleepingBeast: We. Aren’t. Finished.
DeadGirlWalking: I’m done with the vague-posting. I told you at the beginning, if it’s not you, it’ll be someone else. If you’re real, and you’re in, come for me. Otherwise, stay out of it. Because I’m going to find someone.
SleepingBeast: Soon.
[SleepingBeast has left the chat.]
---
I slammed my fist on the desktop and screamed a curse at the screen. There were tears in my eyes.
My DMs were lighting up and the post notifications were increasing in front of my eyes, but all I could do was look at that line.
[SleepingBeast has left the chat.]
I wanted to reach through the screen and grab him by the throat and shake him until he returned the favor.
I wanted to fall into his arms and weep.
I wanted to fuck him silly and beg him to stay with me.
I wanted so many things and none of them seemed possible in that moment, and suddenly I was in a cage again. My breath got quick. Too quick.
My ribs were too small. My lungs wouldn’t inflate properly.
Lights flashed on the edge of my vision as my head began to spin.
Suddenly woozy, vision blurred with tears, naked and shaking, I stumbled back to my room and dropped onto my bed. But dropping so fast, my head lurched and the world flipped. A wave of nausea rocked through me. I gripped the quilt on top of my bed because it felt like my bed was rising and falling, threatening to roll over.
And my heart was beating so fast it felt like a vibration in my chest.
Shit…
Shit.
I threw a hand out for my phone and realized I’d left it… somewhere.
Double shit.
~ CAIN (Twenty minutes earlier) ~
Fucking pussy. Couldn’t close the fucking deal—thank God.
If it weren’t for the fact that I couldn’t let anyone see me, I would have been pacing the street outside her place.
She kissed him.
She fucking kissed him.
And not like she was just looking for a quick hook-up.
She kissed him like she kissed me except… less sure. Like he scared her. And I knew that in her eyes, that was a good thing.
FUCK.
Was that what she wanted?
Gentle?!
It should be. I was smart enough to know that much. But I couldn’t believe it. She was so much more than him. So much more color. So much more fight in her than that ball-less wonder.
He wanted her though. No one would miss that. And I couldn’t blame him.
But that thought just took me back to how all this started and fuck. She went out with him. Dressed up and everything. Like a date. The question was, had she only done it because I’d been gone? Or did she really want someone like him?
But then I remembered those messages, and that post.
She was getting to the edge. She was reaching her limit. I’d been surprised when she didn’t freak out and do something stupid after I disappeared, but that just meant all that crazy was winding up tighter and tighter.
Thank God I’d had the instinct to check the messages from my phone. I didn’t usually take the risk, but knowing he’d left her and she’d been looking for me… I’d had a feeling.
I’d been pissed when I saw her threat in the DM—so pissed my fingers shook, and I accidentally tapped into her profile instead of the reply button, which was how I saw her post.
My heart detonated when I saw that.
FUCKING FUCK.
She didn’t even give me minutes?! Had she already given up?
At least I’d been able to head off Clowne, that dude was dark. I’d seen some of his gore-porn. If I didn’t avoid cops like the plague, I would have sent the images to the Police. I was pretty sure the guy was a bonafide serial killer.
Thank God he was territorial and recognized her as mine. Thank fucking Christ.
I couldn’t keep talking to her right now, when I was so physically close. The risk was too high. I was buzzing. Losing control. Starting to justify shit in my mind that was going to get us both killed—or thrown in jail—and I couldn’t let it happen.
Hunting her had to be planned. I had to be clear headed.
But what if she found another guy in-state tonight? What if…
My heart was beating so hard it thrummed in my skin. I hissed a curse at the dark window of my car, and the dark shadows around her house.
I was sleep deprived, and I had to work tomorrow. I had to leave her. Had to get out of here and wrestle back control. My trackers on her phone would alert me if she moved, but… But the thought of leaving her when she was so obviously on the verge of blowing up her own life…
FUCK.
It took minutes, but I got my breathing under control and muttered at myself that I wasn’t the pussy, and I needed to work tomorrow. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was desperately wrong.
And then, just as I was about to pull the car into the street—I still hadn’t turned my lights on—I saw a car pass and realized it was the same one I’d seen glide past about fifteen minutes earlier. And this time it slowed right down outside her house.
Every instinct prickled and my mind went quiet as I went on the alert, watching.
It didn’t speed up, just eased around the corner.
I waited. Were they looking for a house number in the dark? Or was someone stalking her?
Already?
I turned the car back off and sat in the silence, every sense heightened and perked for any—
There. On the lawn. A shadow pulling away from the hedge and running across the lawn towards the back of the house where her bedroom was.
I was out of the car and sprinting after the fucker before I could blink.