Chapter 50
DIANGELO
Present
I can hardly believe my eyes. Skin that would otherwise be naturally smooth and uniform beneath her navel is a rainbow of mottled shades of pink and brown flesh. Years of scarring in various stages of healing. The most alarming are the three patches of bright pink still in the process of peeling.
Agony is a serrated blade deep in my gut.
My strong, beautiful girl has carried so much shame that she’s been hurting herself. Punishing herself for something that was never her fault.
I close the distance between us and drop to my knees, my eyes fixed on the evidence of her pain. I gingerly take hold of her hips. “You did this here?” Under my watch. I feel horrible knowing she was suffering while I was oblivious.
“There was no way for you to know.”
“I was supposed to be protecting you. If I’d been more understanding and less of an ass…”
“I still would have struggled.” She cups my face in her loving hands. “I’m damaged, D, and that happened long before you entered the picture.”
I close my eyes again, wishing I could do it all over. But I realize I’m making the same mistakes of the past by making this about me. Focusing on my failings is selfish. It’s time to put others first.
I lean in and press a tender but ardent kiss on one of the healed scars.
An apology.
A promise.
“I’m so sorry, firefly.” I peer up to see her chin quivering.
“You’re not disgusted by me?” Her whispered words gut me.
She thought her admission might ruin my desire for her. The truth is far from it. Knowing the extent of her struggles only intensifies my respect for her. I am in awe of Terina. Her perseverance. Her compassion. She is a treasure, and the man who can’t see that is either blind or a fool.
I want her to understand how I feel. I need to show her how committed I am to her.
I stand, keeping our bodies close, and my eyes locked on hers.
“I’m in awe of you, sweet girl. And I want you to know none of it was ever your fault.
Craig got into drugs and gambling. That’s what killed him.
You’re right, he was murdered, but it wasn’t for the reasons you’re thinking.
He owed a prominent bookie hundreds of thousands of dollars.
That was the reason for the quarters. It was a message to other degenerates to pay their debts. It was never about you.”
Her evergreen eyes search mine. “It wasn’t … it wasn’t blackmail?” she asks on a shuddered breath. “But Kristi said—”
“I don’t care what she said or why.” I place my hands by her ears to capture her gaze again. “I’m telling you the truth. His death had nothing to do with you.”
I won’t dwell on that viper of a mother-in-law in front of Rina, but I damn well am going to get answers from the woman as soon as I have a chance.
Rina gasps as though she were close to drowning and taking her first gulp of lifesaving air.
“It wasn’t me.”
I turn my head from left to right in answer. “No, it wasn’t. And even if it had been an enemy of the family coming after you that had ended his life, it’s still not your fault. I said that from the very beginning, and I stand by it.”
“Why did Renzo keep the truth from me?”
“He thought he was protecting you by not smearing Craig’s name. He had no idea Kristi had let you believe the attack was part of some bullshit blackmail story.”
A tear trickles down her cheek.
I bend and kiss the salty trail, noting the way her body lists toward me at the touch. It makes my cock stir in my pants. When I pull back, her heated gaze drops to my lips.
“You’re not on your period, then?” My words are as coarse as a gravel road.
She starts to turn her head, then stills and gives me her voice instead. “No, D.”
My nostrils flare on a heady inhale.
“And the sweat doesn’t bother you?”
“No, D.”
I trail my thumb across her full bottom lip as my dick attempts to burst from my pants.
“If I fuck you, firefly, you’re mine. There’s no going back.” I hold her stare with unflinching intensity. “I need to know that you understand that.”
Her throat bobs. “Please, D,” she whispers. “Fuck me and make me yours.”
I lift her against me, circling her legs around my waist while the beast in my head roars triumphantly.
“It’s time to get out the cuffs.”