Chapter 52
DIANGELO
Present
Rina doesn’t respond to my declaration that I plan to make her my wife. She probably thinks it’s the sex talking. That’s fine. She doesn’t have to believe me for it to be true.
I lift myself back onto my knees, loving the sight of our mixed cum dripping from her body.
“Squeeze for me, firefly. Show me more.” I don’t have to explain. My intent focus makes it clear what I’m asking.
Terina contracts her inner muscles and abs, causing a fresh flood of moisture to drip from her.
“You like that?” she asks with a note of curiosity.
I run my hand along her inner thigh. “More than you could know. And as much as I’d like to make you stay like this for my viewing pleasure, I need to get you cleaned up.”
“We could just use the towel for now.”
“No, I don’t want you getting a UTI. You’re mine to look after, remember?”
She cracks a crooked smile when a long, pitiful whine sounds from beyond the bedroom door.
“Poor thing,” Rina croons. “She’s so lonely out there.”
I roll my eyes good-naturedly, then remove the cuffs from her ankles and wrists. Once I’m done, I let my spoiled mutt in the room and watch as she shakes her back end so violently that she can’t walk straight.
“You are the epitome of ferocious, you know that?”
Bonny beams at me, her tongue lolling out the side of her mouth.
“You’ve just made the classic blunder of underestimating her just because she’s beautiful.”
“I don’t know about that,” I chide, “but at least she doesn’t stink now that she got bathed. Normally, the groomer comes here every couple of weeks so that I don’t have to live with stinky dog smell everywhere.”
Rina sits up, her head angling a fraction to the side. “The groomer comes here, but you went to her shop instead.” She says the words as though the concept is novel, and I have no idea why.
“Yeah?”
She pulls her lips between her teeth, then grins sheepishly. “I heard you that day—I think you were dictating a text. I thought … maybe you were meeting up with someone … for other reasons.”
I tilt my head back in an exaggerated nod and close the distance between us. “You thought I was hooking up with another woman.” I trail my thumb over her flushed cheek. “So my little firefly has a jealous streak.”
“It’s not like I’m the only one,” she counters. “Don’t forget your little meltdown over that poor yoga instructor.” She places her hand in mine and allows me to guide her from the bed and toward the bathroom.
“Oh, I haven’t forgotten about Chase.”
“You remember his name?”
“Of course I do. He and I had words.”
When I peer back at her with a smirk, her eyes are so wide I can see an entire forest in their depths.
“You didn’t,” she breathes.
“I absolutely did, and you can tamp down the righteous indignation. It’s not like I beat the man senseless.”
She props her hands on her hips. “Did you threaten to beat him senseless?”
I turn on the shower water and shrug. “I suppose that’s debatable.”
“DiAngelo!” Her attempt at outrage evaporates the second my lips connect with hers. She softens against me, her tongue tangling with mine. When I end the kiss, her hooded eyes are soft as velvet.
“That’s better.”
“Is that your plan for every argument? To sex me into submission?” Her tone tells me she’s not entirely opposed.
“That, or I can just keep you sex drunk so there’s no argument to begin with.”
A sleepy smile teases her lips wide. “I suppose it’s worth a try.”
I step closer, my face inches from hers, and snap my teeth playfully. She yips and devolves into a fit of giggles.
I could hear that sound every day for the rest of eternity and never tire of it.
We step into the shower. I make sure the water isn’t too hot because I’m sure the heat will feel extra intense on her burns. I still can’t believe she’s been living with that right under my nose. It’s something we’ll have to work together to overcome.
“There’s something I need from you,” I start while she allows the water to soak into her long auburn hair.
“What’s that?”
“I need you to promise me you’ll tell me if you’re struggling.”
She stills and opens her eyes despite the water droplets dotting her lashes. She doesn’t immediately respond, so I continue.
“I need to know when trouble’s creeping up so that I can be there to help. I … I lost my brother because I was too blind to see that I put him in danger, and I don’t want to make that same mistake with you.”
Terina’s hands come to rest on my abs before she hugs my middle. “I’ll tell you if I’m struggling.”
I gently hold her head against my chest and place a kiss on her crown.
“D, can I ask a question about your brother?” She pulls back to meet my gaze. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
“You can always ask me anything.”
“Isa said it was a kidnapping, but you just mentioned putting him in danger—how could you be at all responsible for him getting kidnapped?”
I inhale deeply.
She’s been so fucking brave telling me her truth. It’s time I tell her mine.
I lather my hands with soap and begin washing her.
“The night before he was kidnapped, I went out to a bar and lied to a bunch of random people about being on a yacht. I even showed photos. The problem was, I cleaned the boat—I wasn’t a guest like I’d told them.
I made it sound like we had money and connections.
“The next day, I was hungover, and Elio offered to go into work for me since he bailed on going out the night before. I let him pretend to be me. A man from the night before jumped him on his way to the marina, thinking it was me. Twenty-four hours later, my brother was dead.”
“You were only seventeen, right?”
“Old enough to know better.” I move her back into the spray to rinse off.
Rina hardly notices. Her attention is fixated on me. “You still blame yourself.”
“Wouldn’t have happened without my involvement, so yeah.”
Her fingers trace the tattoo inked on my left pectoral—my brother’s name over my heart.
“I’ve wondered a thousand times over if Craig hadn’t met me if he’d still be alive.
His death may not have been for the reasons I thought, but meeting me still could have been the instigator that sent him down that path.
But when it comes down to it, you were right—the only one truly responsible is the person who actually murdered him.
If I have no reason to feel guilty about the what-ifs, you shouldn’t either. ”
My shame is so ingrained that I feel a visceral need to reject her argument, but I’m also wary of saying something that might imply blame on her part, so I weigh my words carefully. A funny thing happens when I consider my response in light of her perspective—a double standard emerges.
“I sound like a hypocrite if I argue, but I don’t know how not to blame myself,” I admit.
“I get that. It’s going to take some work for me, too.
But you have to consider, if he’d gone to a pharmacy to pick up meds for you while you were sick, and a hit-and-run driver killed him, would that be your fault?
The only reason he was out was because of you, but no one would rationally say you were to blame. ”
I narrow my eyes at her and pull her chest flush against mine. “You are making entirely too much sense. I must not have fucked you thoroughly enough.”
A radiant grin brings out the emerald shards in her eyes. “Sounds like you have work to do.”
I have her spun around, hands on the tile wall, in two seconds flat. “Prepare to be fucked senseless.”
“Yes, D.” Her breathy reply has my already rock-hard cock throbbing.
I angle her hips and burrow my way back home, deep inside her.
This right here is my heaven on earth, and it’s not about the sex, per se.
It’s the trust and connection. The fact that this incredible woman is willing to give herself to me—her safety, her secrets, her very soul—she gives my life more meaning than I knew was possible.
I honor that gift with an orgasm that leaves her legs quivering, and her voice ragged from screaming.
I fucking love that she’s a screamer.
It’s just one of the many ways Terina embraces life with both hands. I can only imagine how vibrant she’ll be without the shadow of guilt and danger looming over her. I will do everything in my power to see that day come. Sooner rather than later.
By the time we’ve finished showering, both of our stomachs are growling for dinner. We head to the kitchen and make sandwiches, too hungry to take the time for anything more complex.
“You seemed off in the car today, so I didn’t want to press, but is everything okay with your parents?” Rina peers at me briefly before taking another bite.
The reminder of Mom’s diagnosis settles heavily on my shoulders.
“Yes and no. My mom’s got some kind of breast cancer and is going to get a double mastectomy in two weeks.”
Rina gasps, her hand coming to her mouth in horror. “Oh God. D, I’m so sorry.”
“She’s in good spirits, and the surgery, from what they said, should take care of it, but it still scares me.”
“Of course, it does.”
I give a little grimace. “It’s not just the cancer. I’ve been a pretty big dick to my parents over the years. They’ve always loved me unconditionally, but I’ve kept my distance out of guilt. I know what I stole from them, and seeing them reminds me of my failures.”
“DiAngelo Farina. It’s time to stop that sort of negative self-talk right-flipping-now. Do you hear me?” Her authoritative outburst is so fucking adorable, I can’t help but smile.
“You giving me orders now?”
“If that’s what it takes to get through that thick skull of yours.
You are a good man who has done his very best to honor the people he loves.
There is nothing to be ashamed of, and if you’d like to have a closer relationship with your parents going forward, then you make that happen. I’m sure they’d love it.”
“Fuck, my mom’s going to love you.”
Rina visibly melts in her chair. “Yeah?”
“Yeah, now eat your food. You’re going to need the energy.” I arch a brow at her, pleased when she hungrily takes another bite because I’m definitely not done with her. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get enough.
I want to make her mine in every way possible, but first, I have to make her safe. If that involves taking down the entire Russian operation, I’ll make it happen. Every. Last. One.