Hunting Little Hope (Littles of Rawhide Ranch #30)

Chapter 1

Chapter One

Hope

I had told myself not to romanticize it.

That was the promise I’d made somewhere over the greater US while cramped into an economy seat with my knees pressed too close to my chest, and the person in the window seat practically asleep on top of me.

I needed to do something to temper the hope budding inside me.

Hope that always bubbled up too soon, too easily.

Rawhide Ranch might have been the lifestyle destination, but it was—at the end of the day—just a place.

A few buildings. Nothing magical about it.

Even though going there was a dream come true.

I’d scrimped, saved, and eaten nothing but ramen for ages in order to afford a spot at their semi-annual summer dating event. Excuse me, no. Dating extravaganza.

However, no matter how many times I tried to tell myself it wasn’t a magical place, when the shuttle turned off the main highway and onto the long road leading toward the Ranch, my fingers tightened around the strap of my bag.

The land opened up in front of us, the fields wide and lush.

Never-ending green stretched out under a big, pale sky.

Wooden fencing and tall trees ran parallel to the road, welcoming me with open arms.

Beyond it, I could see grazing horses and the occasional building that blended into the landscape instead of interrupting it.

This definitely wasn’t one of those fancy places that ruined the landscape to bring in as many people as possible and rake in the money.

Nope. Nuh-uh. Instead, it had a kind of homey feel to it.

Driving up to the Ranch made it feel like I was coming home, not to some dream-come-true holiday destination.

And then I saw them. Those very gates I’d been dreaming of. There was a guardhouse next to them, and as the airport shuttle slowed down, the driver gave my name before being waved through.

My gaze ping-ponged from one building to another, unable to take in all the magnificence, and my heart raced with excitement and hope. Yet again.

We slowed near the main building. It was big but welcoming, and I had to suppress the urge to squeal. People were milling around, talking and laughing like they’d known each other for years, and I wondered if I’d be able to find my place and people among them.

As I stepped down from the shuttle, my boots hitting the ground, a petite brunette introduced herself as Erika, greeting me with an easy smile and a clipboard. Check-in was efficient and friendly. After taking my name, she handed me a name tag, a welcome packet, and a key to my room.

“Orientation’s this evening,” Erika said. “Dinner will be casual and communal on the first night. But you’ll probably want to unpack and settle in first.”

I nodded, thanked her, and adjusted the bag on my shoulder.

I could do this. I was good at this part. Going to new places and meeting new people was something I was used to. Growing up an army brat meant I had made my fair share of first impressions.

It was going deeper than those first impressions that was harder for me.

Which was why I was here. To connect. To find people with the same interests, and maybe—if I were lucky—find the perfect Dom for me.

Another staff member grabbed my bag and took me on a short walk to the room that would be mine during my stay here.

It wasn’t big—I couldn’t afford one of the fancier suites—but it was beautiful and I didn’t have to share it with anyone.

There was a welcome note on the desk, along with a cute stuffed bear wearing a Rawhide Ranch t-shirt.

Oh my. I hope I’ll be able to take that home with me!

Dax, the young man who helped me with my bag set it on my bed and waved away the tip I wanted to give him before nodding and heading on his way.

I shut the door behind me and leaned back against it for a moment, just breathing.

I unpacked quickly, more out of nervous energy than necessity, then swapped my travel clothes for something with a bit more oomph.

When I checked the time, I still had a bit before the orientation and welcome mixer.

I probably should have made the time to go through the packet provided, but I had too much nervous energy flowing through me to be able to concentrate on what was in there anyway.

Plus, I’d done a good amount of research before deciding to toss my name into the mix of attendees.

This summer’s dating extravaganza had been expanded to offer participants an opportunity for an extended visit.

Instead of a long weekend or even a single week, this event offered a full two weeks designed for intentional connection.

Structured mixers, lifestyle workshops, and shared meals were not only offered, but there was also plenty of time available to step back if things felt overwhelming.

The best part? There was no pressure to pair off with anyone. If you found someone you clicked with, great. If not, there were loads of other activities to keep everyone occupied and entertained.

I’d wanted this for a long time.

Well, not this event in particular, but coming to Rawhide Ranch. Meeting more people like me in a judgment-free environment, along with the possibility of meeting someone special was worth making the trip.

When the time came, I made my way back toward the large room I’d been directed to, and the place felt even more alive than it had before. People were scattered across the room. Some sat on big plush couches while others milled around talking easily.

That was when I really noticed them.

The Littles.

They weren’t hard to spot once I knew what I was seeing. Not because they were drawing attention to themselves, but because they weren’t trying to hide anything.

One woman wore a sundress with tiny strawberries printed across it, her hair in pigtails as she swung her arms while walking beside a taller man who matched his pace to hers. Another person sat cross-legged on the carpet with a coloring book, completely unconcerned with who might be watching.

My steps slowed without my meaning them to.

I had known that Rawhide welcomed Littles. It was famous for it, in fact. I’d told myself I was comfortable with it. Supportive even, because even at other exclusive clubs, they weren’t always welcomed quite so openly.

But seeing it was different.

My chest ached at what I saw, and then I felt it. A small, sharp twist of something unkind.

Jealousy.

I straightened my shoulders as I approached the people milling around, instinctively pulling myself back into control. In my dark jeans and neutral top with my tidy hair, I looked composed. Capable.

The adult I had to be at all times.

Even though I was on time, it seemed the mixer had already begun. Drinks lined one table and snacks another. Staff members moved easily through the space, greeting people and basically being a quiet presence without outright hovering.

Someone clinked a glass, and conversation softened.

A large man with salt and pepper hair, a beard, and a clear Dominant demeanor cleared his throat.

“Welcome everyone, to Rawhide Ranch’s summer dating event.

My beautiful wife and Little brat, Sadie, came up with the idea of expanding this year’s event, and we’re very hopeful of its success.

” As the man spoke, his hand rested on the shoulder of a pretty brunette woman in a pink romper.

“For those of you who are first-timers, my name is Master Derek Hawkins and Rawhide is my pride and joy.”

He continued to go through an overview of the event, what to expect, and reminders about consent and communication. He reminded us that the event wasn’t about finding someone immediately, but about making connections and building on that.

I wrapped my fingers around a cool glass and listened, nodding along. Around me, people leaned into one another. Caretakers kept gentle hands on backs or shoulders, and Littles laughed freely.

Standing there, watching it all, I became acutely aware of how carefully I’d learned to keep that part of myself tucked away. How practiced I was at wanting without admitting it. Even to myself.

I’d convinced myself that submission was enough. That structure, rules, and control satisfied whatever softer impulses stirred beneath the surface. That anything beyond that was unnecessary. Indulgent. Not for me.

The idea had always felt safer that way.

Here, surrounded by people who didn’t flinch at being seen, that belief wobbled uncomfortably. I didn’t like the way it made my chest tighten, or how quickly my mind tried to explain it away.

I took another sip of my drink and forced my shoulders to relax.

This wasn’t why I was here. I hadn’t come to unravel myself on day one. I hadn’t come to question things I’d already decided about like who I was and what I wanted.

I stayed where I was, watching from the edges, reminding myself that looking didn’t mean longing.

And even if there was a bit of longing, it didn’t have to mean anything at all.