Chapter 2
TWO
CHANEL
“I’m gonna have tendonitis in my thumb before we finish.”
“There’s a dirty joke in there but I’m too tired to make it,” I said with a soft chuckle as I continued to scroll Uber Eats, waiting for something, anything, to sound appealing. “This is miserable. I miss hunting.”
Regan threw her head back and laughed in a short, dramatic burst. As she shook her head, those turquoise strands whipped around her shoulders. “You were the worst hunter. Has time and the conveniences of modern society dulled your ancient memory? Shall I remind you?”
I swatted at a spider on my thigh, but it was just the tips of my hair. With a snarl at my own hair, I turned back to my cousin. “I wasn’t the worst hunter–”
“Every Virtue in this room knew you’d return with a new furry best friend instead of dinner if we sent you out to hunt for food.”
“You can’t use people who aren’t here anymore against me.” I gestured to the empty locker room around us. “We’re the only two Virtues left.”
Her blue gaze swept the room. I didn’t miss the pain that flashed in her eyes, even though it was merely a split second. “And you could’ve filled this room four times with the animals you couldn’t kill and domesticated instead.”
I tried to sit forward but gave myself whiplash when my hair caught on the edge of the couch.
With a grimace, I yanked it out from behind me, pulling it over each of my shoulders and trying to ignore the feel of the strands grazing the back of my neck.
I rolled my shoulders. “Yeah, because I hated killing animals, but I wasn’t the worst hunter.
I was quite skilled, as a matter of fact–”
“Yes, yes, how could I forget your rule?” She tapped one white ombre-painted nail against her chin and narrowed her eyes.
Then her blue eyes widened as she held her pointer finger up.
“I remember. Chanel will only kill for food if said kill can happen instantaneously, but Chanel will kill for pleasure very, very slowly.”
“The people always deserved it.” I began braiding my hair into long pigtails. “Unrelated, but would it technically still be cannibalism if we’re different species?”
Regan closed her eyes, sighed, and then pinched the bridge of her nose. “There goes my appetite.”
“When has anything curbed your appetite, Mrs. I finished and need a sandwich so get out of my bed immediately?” I did a little shimmy while braiding my hair.
She opened her eyes and looked over at me. “You know, you make a good point. Maybe the praying mantis have had it right this whole time?”
My stomach growled so loud Regan jumped and threw her phone clear across the room. She let out a defeated sigh. “Dammit.”
I snort-laughed. “At least you stopped throwing your daggers when startled.”
“I’ve thrown this exact dagger about a million times and it’s never broken.
” She patted her right thigh and her turquoise magic flashed, revealing one of her favorite daggers that matched the one on her left thigh.
With a flick of her wrist she unsheathed her weapon, flipped it in the air, then caught it.
“My dagger can take a beating. My phone cannot. I think I’m on iPhone number like–”
“Forty-six.” I grinned and leaned back against the purple velvet sofa. “I’ve been counting.”
“SEE.” She groaned, continuing to flip her dagger in the air and catching it by the hilt. “Well, now you have to decide what we’re eating because you made me throw my phone.”
I opened my mouth, then shut it. “You never answered my cannibalism question.”
She shook her head. “I’m not looking at you so I can claim ignorance at the glowing red flags. Just pick dinner.”
“Nothing sounds appealing to me.”
She caught her dagger, then shrugged. “So let’s just make it easy and go for Taco Tuesday?”
“It’s Saturday.”
Her eyes widened. “Is it really? Damn. Today feels very Tuesday-ish.”
I smirked. “You’re not wrong.”
She pursed her lips. “Soooo, tacos?”
“No. No more tacos. Ever. In fact, I don’t want to see another taco until the girls get back.”
The girls.
My heart sank. Regan gave a sad sigh.
“Sorry,” I whispered. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
She smirked and looked over at me. “Nah, Araqiel’s been obsessed with tacos for a hot minute. He’s driving us all to crimes of passion.”
“Is it just me or has this particular food obsession ran longer than his previous obsessions?”
“Maybe someone just needs to introduce him to a new obsession?” She leaned her head back and closed her eyes. “Surely there’s a human out there somewhere inventing a new food that dear old angel boy can fall in love with.”
“I miss those weird fruit and meat stick things we used to eat in Rome.”
Without opening her eyes, she flipped her dagger up and caught it by the handle. She scowled. “When did we have kebabs in Rome?”
“In Ancient Rome–”
“OH.” She opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling. “Tiberius made those yummy stick snacks. I also miss those . . . and Ancient Rome. Those were fun times.”
I lifted one of my feet off the floor and stared down at my leopard-printed Ugg boots. “Don’t miss that fashion. My feet love modern times.”
“You love to wear pants and man-spread.”
I scoffed. “And you don’t?”
At the same exact time, we both spread our legs out wide, our feet flat on the ground.
“I love pants–”
“And pockets–”
“Though I am a sucker for a good blanket draped around my body.” She giggled.
“Speaking of blankets . . .” I frowned and glanced around at the other six cubbies lining the walls of our so-called locker room. “Where are all our blankets? I don’t see a single one–”
“They were starting to smell,” a deep, familiar voice rumbled from the doorway.
Regan and I gasped at the exact same time, sitting up straight in an instant.
I tapped my thighs, bringing both halves of my sword to the surface, but Regan threw her dagger.
It soared across the room in the blink of an eye, aiming directly for .
. . Zuriel’s face. I growled and dropped my hands from my thigh holsters.
That damn man was the only person who had the ability to sneak up on us, and he cherished it.
When it was mere inches from his eye, he reached up and caught Regan’s dagger by the blade with two fingers, then flicked his wrist.
Her dagger slammed into the wall between our heads.
“Rude.”
“Bit aggressive,” I said at the same time and summoned a ball of water into my palm.
Regan yanked her dagger from the wall, then sent bright, fiery flames up and down the blade to heal it, as she always said. “I thought you were bored with showing off to us, Zaddy?”
Zuriel scowled, those black eyebrows sinking low over his pretty blue eyes. He was an angel older than Earth itself, so I really quite enjoyed these rare moments when his age showed. “Zaddy?”
I nodded. “Daddy Zuriel–”
His upper lip curled as he snarled. “Do not call me that.”
“I didn’t.” I grinned while tossing my water-ball from hand to hand.
“I did.”
“Stop,” Zuriel growled.
Regan pointed the tip of her blade at him. “Then stop intentionally scaring me every chance you get, or I shall have my vengeance–”
“In this life or the next–”
“I’d like to see you try.” Zuriel arched one eyebrow and glanced around the room without moving his head. “Quiet in here tonight.”
I rolled my eyes. “My guy, it hasn’t been loud in here for centuries.”
“Yeah, go help the Stone Keepers so we can get this room back up to noise ordinance limits.”
“Or let us do it?” I raised my hand. “We let Collins and Bash take down Tephine, but I could take Riven’s dad–”
“And his mom–”
“His sister doesn’t frighten me like she does everyone else–”
“I don’t miss Clementine though.” Regan shuddered.
“Now that’s something I could happily and easily hunt–”
“No.” Zuriel leaned against the door frame. “You two are not Stone Keepers.”
“We’re Virtues–”
“It’s our job to get stuff done.” I shrugged. “The uglier the better.”
“So that explains your last boyfriend.”
I snorted. “Yeah, but he got hot points for how well he played the guitar . . . and the abs.”
“Fair. Wait a minute.” She turned back to face Zuriel. “Where are our blankets?”
Zuriel sighed like a parent who’d just been asked the same question a hundred times in sixty seconds.
“Bodhi took them to get washed because you hadn’t done so in ages.
” He crossed his arms over his chest, which is when I noticed the folders in his hand.
I sat up straight. In the corner of my eye, I saw my cousin had too.
And angel Zaddy hadn’t missed it either. He smirked and held the folders up. “Your new assignments.” Then he tossed them straight for us.
I didn’t bother to try and catch it. I tended to swat at things by default.
Regan never missed a catch though. She caught them and frowned. “There’s two folders here, Zaddy.”
“Call me that one more time, and there will be a third,” Zuriel growled and crossed his arms over his chest again. “That’s two strikes–”
“And how many strikes are in this one?” Regan held one of the folders up. It had to be an inch-thick full of paper. “Who the hell is this person?”
I grabbed the folder out of her hand with my eyes wide. “My guy, this file is huge?”
Regan frowned and leaned over my shoulder to look. “Who we got?”
The picture of our new assignment, which had been paperclipped to the first paper in the folder, had me scowling.
She had platinum-blonde hair and bright-blue doe eyes that she definitely used to her advantage with men.
Her face had the whole sweet girl next door look.
Hell, her hair was in pigtails with big bows tied around each one.
“Is she a cheerleader?” Regan scoffed. “Did she steal some pom-poms? Or maybe someone’s boyfriend?”
I scanned the page beneath her picture and chuckled. “Daisy Rose? Seriously? Her name is Daisy Rose, and she’s got this big of a folder? These must be three massive strikes.” I flipped the page to see her first strike, then flipped again to see her second, third, and fourth strikes.