Chapter 9
Chapter Nine
Dragon
I keep my eyes on the road, trying to ignore the pit in my stomach. Diana’s question lingers between us, making it feel heavier than before. The truth is, I should be doing this alone.
I let out a sigh, moving one hand from the steering wheel to scratch the back of my head. “It’s nothing you need to worry about,” I say finally, glancing at her from the corner of my eye.
Diana shifts in her seat, turning more fully toward me. “But maybe I want to help,” she says softly.
Her words hang in the air for a moment, and a part of me wants to believe them. The way she looks at me—with such honesty and openness—is different from anything I’ve known.
“I appreciate it,” I say, shifting my gaze back to the road, “but it’s not your problem to fix.”
She doesn’t respond immediately, but I can feel her eyes on me. I always feel her eyes on me. Hell, I feel her . She makes me want things I have no business wanting. She makes me want to open up, spill my guts.
If I do that, she’ll go running.
“I get that it’s not my problem,” she says. “Maybe I want it to be.”
This time I scoff. Really? She has no idea what she’s saying.
I turn to look at her. We lock eyes for what seems like an eternity, then I quickly turn away, focusing once more on the road ahead.
Her words resonate in my head, her raw sincerity and genuine concern making me question everything I’ve ever known about relationships and human connection. But I’m afraid.
Afraid of letting someone in, afraid of facing my demons, afraid of getting too attached only to lose everything in the end.
After all, that’s been my experience.
So the drive is mostly silent. We pass through Colorado Springs, the iconic silhouette of Pikes Peak dominating the horizon. The air becomes crisper, the scent of pine lingering as the road climbs gradually in elevation. There are small towns nestled against the mountains.
“I always wonder who lives in places like these,” Diana says. “I know Snow Creek is pretty isolated, but it’s nothing compared to these small towns, hours away from the nearest airport.”
I nod slowly. “Probably is nice to get away from it all.”
Diana bites her lip. “Probably is.”
The traffic thins as we continue south, and the landscape begins to shift. Crossing into southern Colorado, the flat plains give way to rolling hills, and the jagged ridges of the Sangre de Cristo Mountains come into view.
“I don’t think I’ve seen the Rockies this far south,” Diana remarks. “I guess it’s easy to forget how long they really are.”
“Yeah,” I say. “Long.”
This is agonizing. But at least the views are pretty.
The road narrows and winds more as we approach the New Mexico border, and the scenery becomes increasingly rugged. Red rock formations begin to dot the landscape, their vibrant hues glowing as the sun starts to set. The air feels warmer, drier, and the land is more arid now, with sagebrush and juniper replacing the lush greenery of Colorado. There are towns speckled with adobe homes here. So different from the high-rises of Denver.
“Do you ever wonder what it’s like to live in a house like that?” I offer.
Diana smiles. “So now you’re starting the conversation?”
I let out a short laugh. “Can’t let you have all the fun.”
“I guess you can’t.” Diana reaches across the car and runs her hand along my arm.
A chill runs up and down my spine. Is she still interested in me? We had a few great romps in the sack, but I kind of figured she thought that was a big mistake.
Of course, if she weren’t at least slightly interested in getting to know me better, she wouldn’t have asked to come along on this trip.
We cross the Rio Grande Gorge Bridge. The river cuts deep into the earth, carving a path through the rugged terrain, and the vast expanse of the gorge opens up beneath us. It’s gorgeous, but I hold my breath as we cross the bridge—they always make me a little bit nervous. Especially this one. We’re not surviving the drop if this bridge gives out.
I look over and see that Diana’s holding her breath, too.
We arrive in Taos just as the sun is slipping below the horizon, painting the sky with hues of purple and orange. It is a breathtaking sight, one that momentarily stuns me into silence.
But it’s nothing compared to the woman next to me.
“Wow,” Diana says, her eyes wide with awe. “It’s beautiful.”
“Yeah, it is.”
But I’m not talking about the sunset. I’m talking about the look on Diana’s beautiful face. She’s looking at it like it’s the first sunset she’s ever seen.
She finally looks away, turns toward me. “So where will we be spending the night?”
God.
The night.
A hotel room.
With Diana.
In my bed all night.
“Don’t know,” I say.
“We should probably figure that out,” she replies, a hint of amusement in her voice. “Unless you plan on us sleeping in the car?”
I glance at her quickly before focusing back on the road. “No, I don’t.”
“Good. Because as comfortable as this car is, I’d rather not.” She pulls out her phone. “I’ll see if there are any hotels available nearby.”
Her brows are furrowed.
God, is she ever not gorgeous?
“Got one!” she exclaims after a few moments. “I’ll plug it into the GPS.”
I nod and continue driving until we get to the destination.
Canyon Vista Resort and Spa.
Resort and spa? I was thinking a Motel Six or something. Maybe a Holiday Inn.
This place is way too ritzy. The kind of hotel where extremely tan sixty-year-old people wearing white linen suits spend their winters. It’s like something out of a Southwestern postcard—a series of adobe-style buildings in earthy tones of terracotta and sand. Cottonwood trees and clusters of sagebrush surround the resort, and the place is outfitted with large exposed beams, handcrafted wooden doors, and wrought-iron accents. A sprawling courtyard, dotted with colorful desert flowers and a central stone fountain, leads to the entrance.
I stop the car. “Diana, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind.”
“Don’t worry about it, Dragon. I’m the one who stowed away on your trip. It’s on me.”
I shake my head, looking at the resort. “I can’t afford this. I’m not going to let you pay for my room.”
She lets out a huff. “Fine. We’ll go somewhere else.”
“You can stay here. But I can’t, Diana.”
“All right, Dragon.” She puffs her lips out. “What would it take to get you to stay here with me?”
“You’re already letting me stay in your penthouse for free.” I sigh. “I don’t like being emasculated, Diana.”
I expect her to roll her eyes at that one, but she doesn’t. She simply takes my hand. “Look at me, Dragon.”
I turn and meet her gaze. Those dark-brown eyes are like pools of rich chocolate.
“I would never think of emasculating you. That’s not what this is about.” She grabs my hands, squeezes them gently. “We’ve been to bed together, Dragon. I know who you are. What kind of man you are. This is only about us being comfortable for the night. And if you want to pay me back, that’s fine. Why don’t you buy dinner?”
“One dinner won’t make up for everything you’ve done for me.”
Her eyes twitch upward, but then she returns them to me. “I wish you’d stop thinking about it that way. I have the means. It’s not fair that I was born into it, and you weren’t. It’s just how it is. I’d like to do this for you.”
“In return?” I ask.
“In return, nothing.” She sighs. “I spent the last two days trying to figure out how to live with my conscience.”
“Because of me?”
“No. Because of something at work. I don’t know that I really want to go into it, but suffice it to say, I made the wrong choice. Rather, in the end, I made the right one. It cost me my position at the firm, but that’s okay because I can live with myself. I’ll be able to sleep tonight.” She opens the car door. “I’d like to sleep in a comfortable bed. And I’d like you to sleep in one, too.”
Is she talking the same bed? Or two separate but equally comfortable beds?
God, I hope it’s the former.
I lean toward her. “What exactly happened, Diana?”
“Tell you what,” she says. “I’ll level with you, Dragon…if you level with me.”
I look down at the spotless floor of Diana’s BMW. Right. That won’t be happening anytime soon.
On the other hand, though, she’s here with me. I should have told her not to come. I should have insisted. But I didn’t.
I didn’t because on some level I want her here.
On a lot of levels I want her here.
I’m feeling things for this woman—this woman who’s so damned out of my league—that I’ve never felt before. I’d say it was love if I knew what the fuck love was.
Diana Steel may like fucking me, but she’s never going to love me.
I need to get that out of my head right now.
“You going to answer me?” she asks.
I inhale slowly and let the air out on a sigh. “I’d really like to level with you, Diana. I would. But there are things I just don’t talk about.”
“Tell you what.” She gestures to the resort’s entrance. “Let me book us rooms here. It’s a gift. Then we’ll go to dinner, which you can pay for, and I will level with you about what happened at work. No strings. No pressure. But I want you to know something.” She leans toward me, cups my cheek. “I’m a very good listener. Just ask Brianna. I’ll never judge you, Dragon.”
I don’t doubt her words.
I don’t think she will judge me over what happened with Griffin. I think she’ll believe me when I tell her I didn’t do it. If she doesn’t, then fuck her. Because it’s the truth.
What she may not be able to live with is what I did at the group home. The one secret I still carry with me. Not even Jesse or my therapist knows.
But I relent. I relent because I want to please Diana. And frankly, this place looks amazing.
“Fine. We’ll stay here. I’ll buy you dinner. I bet they have some great Mexican food here at the hotel restaurant.”
“I’m sure they do.” She smiles. “Mexican food sounds great.”
I pull into a parking spot, and we walk into the Spanish-style hotel.
The lobby is just as intricate as the exterior. We cross floors of polished terracotta tiles, and the walls are plastered in earth tones, interrupted only by large windows which, I imagine, offer views of the stunning desert landscape outside in daylight. A grand kiva-style fireplace anchors the area, surrounded by plush leather sofas with gorgeous Native American-inspired prints. We approach a large reception desk adorned with decorative pottery.
“You can take a seat on one of those couches,” Diana says. “I’ll take care of the rooms.”
I’ve barely taken a seat and started to examine the colorful patterns of the sofa’s throw pillows when Diana returns, handing me a key card. “Here you go. Adjoining rooms.”
“You could’ve just gotten one room,” I say. “You can trust me to keep my hands to myself.”
She shakes her head. “I got two rooms for you. Something personal is going on with you, Dragon, and I want you to have your space if you need it.”
Her words surprise me.
This woman is really something. Something I never should’ve touched—never should’ve soiled with my sin.
“I know I can trust you,” she continues. “That’s not what this is about. I promise.”
We head to the elevator and go up to the third floor where our rooms are. I slide my key card through the reader, and the door unlocks with a barely audible click. The room is impressive, tastefully decorated in warm hues of reds and oranges. There’s a large king-size bed with a forest-green down comforter covered in a silhouetted cactus pattern, a small sitting area with plush chairs, and a flat-screen television mounted on the wall.
But it’s the view from the spacious balcony that makes my breath hitch. As I step out, the last rays of sunlight are fading away, casting long shadows over the mountains in the distance. Beside me, Diana steps out onto her adjoining balcony, looking just as awed as I feel.
“Diana,” I start to say, but she cuts me off with a gentle shake of her head.
“Enjoy the view,” she murmurs. “We can talk over dinner.”
We stand there for a few more moments, drinking in the stunning vista before us.
Eventually, we tear ourselves away. I pull out a fresh shirt, trying not to think about the conversation that lies ahead. Diana steps inside her room.
I stand in front of the mirror to brush out my long hair. The man staring back at me is a man I hardly recognize. He’s a man with weight on his shoulders and secrets tucked deep inside, a man who has found something precious where he least expected it. He’s a man feeling an emotion that is just as alien as it is intoxicating.
A soft knock echoes from the connecting door between our rooms. “Ready?” Diana asks through the door.
“Just a minute,” I call back.
I put on my shoes and then open the door between our rooms. I have to stop myself from gasping at Diana, who looks as beautiful as ever. Her dark hair is pulled back, revealing the graceful line of her neck and the elegant curve of her shoulders. She wears jeans and a V-neck sweater, and on her feet are burgundy leather short boots.
“Wow,” I can’t help murmuring.
Her lips curve. “Look who’s talking.”
I offer her my arm—something I’m not sure I’ve ever done—and together we leave our rooms and head downstairs to the hotel restaurant.
The scents of cumin and cilantro fill the air as the host ushers us to a table. Flickering candles cast shadows around the room. A musician is playing a Spanish melody on a guitar in one corner of the room. I’m not a fan of music while I eat, but it’s so soft that I kind of like it.
Once we’re seated, Diana looks around. A server brings margaritas to the table next to us, and Diana smiles.
“That’s Donny’s favorite drink,” she says.
“You told me,” I say. “That’s hilarious.”
“I know. Dad with his bourbon and Dale with his wine—” She clasps her hands over her mouth. “I’m sorry, Dragon. I shouldn’t be talking about alcohol.”
I shake my head. “I’m good. I made it through the party last weekend without indulging. Made it through getting arrested, made it through talking with an investigator about?—”
“Hey,” she says. “I told you I would tell you what happened at work and why I had to leave.”
I nod, but before she can start telling her story, our server interrupts us. “Good evening. I’m Chanel, and I’ll be your server. Can I get you a drink to get started?”
“Do you mind if I have a margarita?” Diana asks.
I stop myself from rolling my eyes. She’s just being thoughtful.
“Why would I mind?”
She smiles. “A margarita, please.”
“Just water for me,” I say.
Once Chanel leaves, Diana smiles. “I didn’t mean to put you on the spot like that. I don’t even drink very much, as you know. But for some reason, a margarita sounds good. Refreshing.”
“You don’t have to explain yourself to me,” I say. “The state of New Mexico allows you to drink, so you should drink if you want.”
“I know that. And I’ll only have one drink. I never have more than one or two anyway.”
“Diana, if you feel like getting drunk off that pretty ass of yours, you’ll get no judgment from me.” I shrug. “I’m a fucking addict. I accept that. I’m dealing with it. It’s not always easy, but I’m determined this time. And part of the process is being okay with other people imbibing in my presence. It’s something people do. I would never dream of asking someone to turn down any number of drinks on my account.”
She gives me a look then, tilting her head. And for the life of me, I think she can see right through me.
“I’ll tell you why I left after less than two days on my job.”
“Only if you want to.”
“I do.” She purses her lips. “I think it will help me to talk about it. I suppose I’ll eventually have to call my father and mother to let them know.”
“No, you don’t. You’re an adult. You don’t have to tell anyone if you don’t want to.”
She smiles. “You know what? You’re right.”
Chanel brings the margarita, and Diana takes a sip, wincing. “This will be my only margarita. It’s good, but way too sweet.”
“I never liked sweet drinks either.” I take a sip of water.
“There’s a shocker.” She wipes a grain of salt from her lips and giggles. “So anyway, there was this project with the firm I was interested in—this amazing mountaintop resort, the first of its kind. Yesterday, my boss gave me several files to look at and asked me to give him my thoughts. One of them was that dream project.”
I furrow my brow. “That sounds good, not bad.”
“Yeah, and I totally thought it was. The problem is, when I was going over the plans, I found an issue that could cause some major problems.”
“And did you alert your boss?”
“I honestly wasn’t sure what to do. I found out from one of my colleagues that my boss knew about the issue already and didn’t want to fix it because of money, of course.”
“Of course,” I say.
“Anyway, I knew the right thing to do would be to bring it to the client’s attention, but after I talked to my colleague—he told me that everyone all the way up to the top already knows about it—I wasn’t sure what to do. So I called my dad.”
“What did your dad tell you to do?”
She sighs. “He didn’t tell me anything. He said I was a grown-up and had to figure this out for myself but to trust my conscience.”
“And your conscience said to tell the client.”
“That’s just it.” She frowns. “I had decided not to. For the good of my colleagues.”
I cock my head. “Seriously, Diana?”
“Well…yeah.” She bites her lip. “I’ve never had to think about what it might feel like to not have money. To worry about those things. And I didn’t want to put any of my colleagues in that position.”
Dragon scoffs. “First of all, Diana, your colleagues are all high-paid architects. Whether or not one of them has a pregnant wife, they’re still doing fine.”
Diana bites her lower lip. “Maybe. I just know they don’t have the kind of money I have.”
I chuckle. “No one has the kind of money you have, Diana.”
“You said you wouldn’t judge me.”
“I’m not judging you.” Then I realize how my voice just sounded. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.” She takes a small sip of her margarita. “I don’t expect you to understand.”
“But I do understand.” I reach across the table, place my hand on hers. “At least I think I do. I want to.”
She smiles at me, squeezes my hand slightly. “I ended up telling the client anyway. I have no idea about the fallout. My boss found the email that I hadn’t yet sent and raised holy living hell.”
“How did your boss find the email?”
“The asshole sneaked into my cubicle and looked through my computer files.”
I drop my jaw. “Seriously? And you’re still worried about how this will affect your colleagues?”
She frowns, looking down at the table. “I have no idea who’s going to be affected by this. But I was angry enough over his snooping that I sent the email right in front of him. Then I left.”
I scratch the side of my head. “You just leaned over him and sent the email? While he was sitting there?”
A small spark of fire shoots through her eyes. “There was a bit of a struggle. But yeah.”
“That’s…pretty fucking badass, Diana.”
She demurely takes another sip of her drink. “You say that as if you’re shocked, Dragon.”
I blink. The few sips of that margarita have brought out her flirty side.
I don’t hate it.
“I’m not shocked. More…amused.” I smirk for a moment and then look right into her beautiful eyes. “For what it’s worth, I think you did the right thing.”
She sighs. “I hope I did, Dragon. I know I did the right thing for the client and for the millions of guests who will one day visit the resort. Like… What if something happened when the resort was full? At the very least, people would have been inconvenienced, but worst-case scenario, they could have gotten hurt, could have died. ”
I look at Diana.
At this woman who was born into riches but who has turned out to be one of the most generous and kindhearted people I’ve ever met.
I have no doubt she did what was best.
I wish…
Fuck.
I wish I were even close to good enough for her.