Chapter 12
Jane was disappointed but with whom she could not quite say.
She had always sought to see the best in everyone and wished well for all but today she was jealous and that also of her most devoted sister.
Elizabeth had always been her one true companion and champion.
She knew all about the tumultuous relationship between her and Mr. Darcy.
Now it seemed that at long last her sister might find her happy ending, instead of rejoicing, her heart ached.
She had seen them in an unguarded moment laughing and teasing each other as they walked arm in arm in Longbourn’s garden and for the first time realised what true love looked like.
Mr. Darcy had always been a stern and reserved man but the joy on his face as he walked with Elizabeth could not have been mistaken.
They had been walking away from the house as she came back from the still room.
It was clear from their happy manner that they had come to some understanding.
She knew all that Mr. Darcy had done to help Lydia had been to ease Elizabeth’s sorrow and now it seemed he had at long last won his sister’s regard, for Elizabeth’s affection was plain to see.
Jane was sure that they would make a perfect couple but somehow this thought did not make her happy and that in itself was why she was disappointed by herself.
She knew she was jealous because it had been she and Bingley who were expected to find such felicity.
She had been nervous about her reunion with Bingley but had hoped that he would soon put her at ease.
She remembered the cheerful amiable man with a ready smile and light laugh for all.
The man that had returned seemed embittered and ill-tempered.
All Bingley seemed to care about was his own feelings and not her heartbreak, that is what disappointed her the most.
She knew Mr. Darcy had suffered the most acute disappointment from Elizabeth in Kent but it seemed to have deepened his regard for her more than anything.
Whenever they were in company Jane could easily see that the man had eyes for no one except Elizabeth.
His every action, gesture, and deed were done with the sole aim to please Lizzy and that itself showed her what true affection looked like.
All Bingley wanted was the past months to disappear without making any effort to assuage her feelings.
She knew it was wrong of her to compare both the gentlemen, but she could not help herself when the contrast was so apparent.
She loved Bingley with all her heart but for them to have any future together he needed to mature and learn to take responsibility.
She understood his reasons for leaving Netherfield but he needed to own up to his mistakes and discuss them with her.
All she saw was that he just wished the past months away and was petulant when the world did not align with his wishes.
This surliness disappointed her in Bingley whom she had always considered a perfect man.
As she sat in the front parlour contemplating everything Mrs. Hill came in with an express from Brighton.
Hurriedly, Jane tore open the letter and quickly read through the contents.
She could scarce believe what was written and instinctively ran out of the house towards the back garden where she knew Elizabeth and Darcy to be.
Scarcely had she turned from the house when she collided with Bingley.
******
Bingley had been up all night thinking of Jane and had finally resolved that he needed to speak to her about the past months and assure her of his continued affections.
He had always believed in grand gestures and had been puzzling over what he could do as he rode towards Longbourn.
He had been lost in his thoughts as he handed over his horse to the groom and made his way towards the manor house when he collided with his angel.
He was taken aback and stood frozen for a moment. Miss Bennet, who had always been this calm and composed creature with pretty blushes and sweet smiles, was running with a wild gleam in her eyes and strands of her hair flying past.
“Mr. Bingley!” she exclaimed, pressing her hand to her heaving bosom.
“Miss Bennet! Whatever is the matter?”
“A letter just arrived from Brighton. I, well I was going to find Lizzy and share the news with her. For I have no idea what to do.”
“I hope it is not bad news. If you need anything, anything at all you may tell me at once. I am completely at your service.”
Such solicitations from Bingley quickly incited Jane's tears for she had been longing for any sign that he still cared. Taking her by the hand Bingley led her to a nearby bench where he made her sit and knelt in front of her.
“Miss Bennet, it grieves my heart to see you thus. Please let me know whatever is the matter. Has Miss Lydia worsened?”
Jane clumsily wiped her tears and responded, “Lydia is fine, more than fine for she seems to have regained consciousness, but it seems the injury has affected her eyesight for she complains that she sees everything around her as hazy.” At this Jane again broke out in sobs.
Bingley, who scarcely knew what to do grabbed at the first idea and spoke, “Miss Bennet, I will travel to Brighton at the earliest and make sure Miss Lydia is in good health and has all necessary care. I am sure whatever difficulty she is facing is only for a short while and soon she will be restored to her full health.”
“I cannot ask this of you, already you have travelled to Hertfordshire just for our sake and to impose on you further would be insupportable.”
“Miss Bennet, I hope you know that I would do anything for your happiness. That I was ever the cause of your sorrow will always be my one true guilt. Travelling to Brighton is the least I could do. I will leave tomorrow morning.” Bingley got up and offered his hand to Jane.
As they made their way back to Longbourn Darcy and Elizabeth also came around the corner and seeing Jane's tear-stricken face were quick to join them.
Elizabeth was overjoyed to learn that Lydia was finally awake.
It may have been due to the delicate discussion she had with Darcy that had made her much more optimistic but in her happiness, she was disposed to believe Lydia's difficulties would also be short-lived.
Darcy was quick to offer his company to Bingley as he travelled to Brighton but again it was Elizabeth who stopped him.
“Mr. Darcy, not to sound too impertinent, but you would be superfluous in Brighton while here in Hertfordshire we would be glad for your company.”
Darcy, who was incapable of denying his lady anything was quick to accede and soon they all made their way back to Longbourn where the rest of the occupants were apprised of the latest details.
Both Mrs. Gardiner and Mary were more than relieved to hear about Lydia's progress and Georgiana was quick to add her wishes for Bingley’s safe travels and for Lydia's return to full health.