Chapter 32
Ava
Logan spent over an hour cleaning his truck the night we got home from the hospital. The guilt I felt when I saw the mess as we drove home was overwhelming. He should have called an ambulance, but according to Macie, there was no talking him out of his decision to drive me.
By the time he came back in, it was well after midnight and he must have assumed I was asleep. He went straight to his room.
Now, several days had passed, and not much had changed between us. For some reason, I thought our moment in the ER, his declaration of his past, was a gateway to talking again.
However, I hadn’t made much of an attempt either. The hospital gave me a note to miss classes for a few days, and I took full advantage of that. Who wouldn’t? But like it had been the past couple weeks, my room had become my safe haven.
My mom had been checking in on me each day.
I looked forward to our long phone calls, it filled my time.
She was so upset she couldn’t come visit, but she was busy with Amelia’s sports schedule.
Plus, they were getting ready for prom and graduation, which were both coming up.
Trust me, she didn’t forget one detail about any of it.
The day after I got home, I heard Macie and Becca raving about how well Logan did in his first rugby game that day.
We were all in the living room, and they recounted the game, almost play by play, and the scores he made, et cetera.
The team had a party that night to celebrate.
It took every ounce of willpower to not confront him when he got home.
Because I knew full well there were girls all over him at that party.
But I had no right.
This was my doing.
There was a knock on my bedroom door, and my heart sped up with anticipation.
“Yeah?” I put my ereader aside and sat up in my bed, running my fingers through my short locks.
“Can I come in?” Macie asked.
I knew he wouldn’t be home. Why was I disappointed?
“Sure.” I tried to sound enthusiastic.
As she came in, she was dressed to be heading out, a windbreaker over her arm, shoes on. She sat at the foot of my bed, a small smile to contradict the pinch of her concerned eyebrows.
“Whatcha doin’?” She looked around and saw that I was reading. “Reading anything good? And how’s the cut feeling?”
Looking down at my wrist, I was reminded of how serious the injury turned out to be. The glass sliced my wrist very close to a major artery. They were able to stitch me up but were close to needing to go in to surgically repair everything. They thought it was nicked deeper than it was.
Due to the location of the slice, I had to go through a psychiatric evaluation before being released. They needed to confirm I hadn’t tried to take my own life, which I understood. But it made for a really long night.
“It’s getting itchy, but that means it’s healing, doesn’t it?”
She nodded and we both smiled.
“Me and Becca are going to Logan’s game, meeting Ty there. Wanna come?”
My first instinct was to jump out of bed. I was bored, and of course I wanted to see him play. Then I thought it might send the wrong message if he saw me there.
However, over the past few days, I think I realized that the message I wanted to send him was very different now than what I originally thought.
“Can you give me a few minutes to get ready? I’d love to come.”
Her smile grew wide, and she did that happy, giddy hand clap she always does.
“Yay! I’m so excited! We’ll be downstairs waiting, take your time,” she said.
“OK.”
OK. I was doing this. Logan’s game. I was going to his game. Though he would probably have no idea I was even there. We’d be up in the stands, he’d be on the field. He’d have no clue. I was simply supporting my roommate in his new venture.
Right?
“Go Mountaineers! Go Logan!” Becca screamed so loud my ears were ringing. brU was winning, and no matter how closely I paid attention to the action on the field, I still didn’t understand the game.
“It’s kinda like football, they tackle like it, but the game keeps going, which is different,” Ty explained.
I wasn’t an expert on football either, so it made little difference.
The game was a rough one, the guys got bloody.
They tackled but wore no protective equipment.
It was them and them only taking each other down.
I enjoyed watching Logan out there, though.
He seemed to be loving it, his smile bright through the mud on his face after every play.
Logan was coming off the field, someone replacing him for the current play, when Becca yelled his name. His head turned at his name, finding us. He waved, an appreciative smile widening across his face.
Then his eyes found me.
I knew because his smile faltered.
Just as quickly as it did, it rebounded, and he smiled wider yet. His hand went higher in the air as he waved to me, giving me a thumbs up.
And I waved back.
I wasn’t sure why, exactly. Maybe he was thanking me for coming. Maybe I was telling him yes, I’m here. What I did know was him being happy to see me made my insides do a tiny flip. As I covered the smile with my hand, I looked at my roommates to see if they’d noticed.
And they were looking right at me, including Ty.
Then Logan turned around to face the field and watch his team play.
That was when I saw the back of his orange uniform shirt.
And my heart exploded.
He chose number 14.
Maybe I was manifesting things in my head, or maybe he chose it intentionally. I went with the second. The fourteenth was the date of our first kiss. And it was also the date of my birthday.
My hands went to my mouth, covering my audible gasp. Though with the sounds of the crowd, I was sure no one would have heard me.
The game continued. Logan played great, as did the entire team, bringing brU to another victory. The guys hoisted each other onto shoulders in celebration while on the field as the fans cheered them on.
Becca grabbed me by the hand, steering me down the stadium stairs, straight toward the team bench.
“Where are we going?” I asked. But I knew. The fear of seeing him right now was very real. I didn’t know why, but I felt like I needed time for what could be starting between us again to have room to breathe.
“C’mon, we saw him after his last game, too. He loved it!” Becca screeched. “He’ll love that you’re here this time.”
The four of us weaved through the throngs of people standing about. Who would have thought this many people came to a club game? But rugby was a crazy sport to watch, so it commanded an audience.
As we approached the bench, the players were packing up their bags and still congratulating each other on their second win.
“Logan!” Becca yelled.
His blonde head turned to his name, and he came toward the entourage here to greet him.
“Hey guys, thanks for coming.” As he spoke, he shook Ty’s hand. Then he came and gave hugs to Becca, Macie, and me.
“Thank you for coming,” he whispered in my ear. As he pulled back, he gestured to my wrist. “How are ya feeling?”
“It’s healing, I’m good.” I wanted the attention off me, and back to him. “This was amazing, Logan. You were amazing.”
We both knew there was so much more that needed to be said between us as our eyes remained connected for that extra second longer than was necessary. But then we were reminded of our company.
“Logan!” Macie yelled. “I’m loving these games. You are so good!”
“Thanks, Macie.” Turning to the whole group, he smiled, his eyes closing momentarily.
“Thank you, all of you, for coming. You don’t know how much it means to me.
” He reached down and picked up his bag.
“Well, you know the drill, there’s a party.
And us guys go straight there, no showers or anything first. So, you’re all welcome. ”
As he spoke with Becca and Ty, I pulled Macie aside.
“Can we run home real quick?” I asked.
She looked at me as her shoulders perked up at my request. “You want to go to the party?”
I nodded. “Yeah, but I need to do something first, and I need your help.”
She agreed enthusiastically before telling Becca and Ty to get a ride with Logan. We snuck away to avoid any questions, making our way to her car.
“I’m happy you want to go out tonight. I’ve been worried about all the time you’ve been spending alone.”
My head fell against the headrest as she pulled out of the parking lot. I contemplated how much I was going to say to her on the drive home.
“Yeah, I know. It’s not only what happened at the party that’s been bothering me, though. There’s some other stuff going on, stuff I haven’t been comfortable telling you.” I kept my gaze out the windshield, refusing to look her way.
“Oh yeah,” she said. “Well, I’m not blind, ya know. Ave, none of us are.” She chuckled after saying that.
I risked a glance her way.
And the smile she had for me was warm and knowing.