Chapter Twenty-One
Raven
The friendship song, now titled “Better With You,” is finally ready!
After spending the whole week tweaking it and making sure it’s perfect, I’m ready to give it to Next Level Dudes on Thursday afternoon.
And not only that, I’ve been getting lots of lyrics down for the song that was giving me writer’s block.
I don’t think I’ve ever been so inspired to write like this before.
I guess knowing that Next Level Dudes will perform one of my songs has decimated whatever’s been holding me back.
I never imagined it would feel so good to share my music with other people, but after “I Don’t Need Your Kisses” was exposed, everything changed.
Kylen and his friends loved the song so much that they did everything they could to find the writer.
Obviously I’m still too embarrassed to share that kind of song with the world, but other ones? I don’t mind it at all.
Okay, fine. I guess I can admit to myself that my renewed friendship with Kylen has been an inspiration for me, too.
I’m in such a better mood now, no longer feeling like an anvil rests on my heart, no longer feeling like my heart will shatter into a million pieces every time I think about him.
Now whenever he enters my mind, I feel my heart soar.
I read “Better With You” over for what must be the millionth time, then grab my guitar from my closet and try to compose the music.
I know that Next Level Dudes has their own sound, but my fingers are itching to match the perfect music to the song.
The band can either go with it or compose their own music.
Since the song is about the love of friendship, I play a very soft and heartfelt melody. It peaks at the most emotional parts and slowly descends at the least emotional parts. I sing along with the music to make sure it sounds perfect.
I quickly write down the notes and then play the song again, my lips lifting into such a large grin that my cheeks hurt. Wow. I’ve never composed such beautiful music before. Maybe I’m patting myself on the back here, but even I’m impressed.
I’ve never felt an urge to share my song with anyone before.
I always ripped a completed song out of my lyrics notebook and placed it in my special folder, never to see the light of day, except when I skim it over.
But now? All I want to do is share the song with Kylen. Grabbing my phone, I shoot him a text.
Raven: I have exciting news! Guess what?
He responds in less than thirty seconds.
Kylen: I’m awesome?
Raven: Maybe. But that’s not the news.
Kylen: Bummer. Okay, uh…you finished your homework?
Raven: It’s very lame of you to think that finishing homework is a cause for celebration.
Kylen: I agree.
Raven: So?
Kylen: I have no idea.
Raven: Looks like I’ll have to surprise you. Are you free?
Kylen: Well, I actually feel like I’m in prison right now, with the amount of homework my teachers piled up on me. So I guess you would have to define your definition of “free.”
I can’t help but laugh out loud. It’s comforting to know he’s still as funny as he was at camp.
Raven: Okay, I’ll try to be as specific as possible. Kylen Barrett, are you currently in your room partaking in an activity you can take a break from so I can come over and present you with my surprise?
Kylen: Thanks, Raven. That clears up a lot of my confusion.
To answer your question, I am currently engaged in the vigorous activity of trigonometry.
Considering I’m seconds away from pulling every single strand of my hair out, it might be beneficial for me if you would stop by and force me to take a break.
Raven: You are the biggest dork in the world.
Kylen: I aim to please :)
Raven: I’m coming over to save you. Be there soon.
I rip the pages with my lyrics out of my notebook and slide them into an empty folder.
Then I grab my guitar, which has never once left this room, and make my way to the boys’ dorm.
I’ve been here before, but it never ceases to amaze me how different it is.
It’s louder in a different kind of way than in the girls’ dorm.
Mostly, there are guys shouting at one another because of video game matches or the sports they manage to play in the hallway or in their rooms. There is also loud music playing from some of the rooms. And it goes without saying that the place is much dirtier than the girls’ dorm, and smellier.
It kind of feels like I’m walking into the largest man-pad I’ve ever seen in my life.
When I finally reach Kylen’s room on the third floor, I gently rest my guitar against the wall and knock on the door, hugging the folder to my chest. I hear some shuffling inside and then footsteps before the door flings open.
Kylen grins. “Hey.”
I think his smiling face will always spark something inside me. “Hi. Can I come in?”
“Of course.” He widens the door. “Please excuse the mess. I tried to clean up as much as I could, but…” He shrugs. “Don’t look at Beck’s side of the room. You might just die of disgust.”
His side of the room isn’t so bad. There are some clothes hanging off his bed and his desk is very messy with school stuff and snack wrappers. But the other side? Oh my gosh. It’s like some creature swallowed everything Beck owned and threw up all over his side.
Kylen follows my gaze and offers me an apologetic smile. “I warned you. The guy just refuses to clean up. Even my grandma gave him an earful. And believe me, when my grandma gives you an order, you’d better comply.”
“Is she that strict?” I ask as I lower myself on the chair Kylen gestures to. It’s right next to his at his desk.
“She’s the kind of person who is strict when she needs to be and the sweetest person in the world when she needs to be.
I often wonder how she knows which hat to put on.
I think she did a great job raising me. I know it wasn’t easy.
As close as she and my grandpa and I are, they aren’t my parents.
To think they had to do the parent thing all over again, and at their age?
” He shakes his head. “It must have been really tough.”
Kylen and I have spoken about his grandparents before, but I love that he’s still comfortable being open with me about his feelings.
“I told you this at camp and I’m telling you now, they sound like amazing people. And you said they’re coming on Sunday for Parents’ Day, right?”
“Yep. I’m picking them up from the airport on Saturday.”
“Nice. It’ll be great to see them again, right? You probably miss them so much. The rest of us are used to being away from home.”
“Yeah, I do. But I guess I got used to it, too. Maybe because I like it here.”
“Yeah?”
He grins. “Yeah. I’ve got my friends, and you’re here. I can’t really complain.”
My cheeks heat up. “Well, I’m glad you’re here, too.”
He smiles and I return it.
“So what’s the exciting news?”
After taking a deep breath, I let it seep out of my nose and hold out the folder. “For you and your friends.”
He gives me a confused look before taking it and opening it. His brows dip with even more confusion as he slips the pages out and reads them. Then a humongous smile takes over his face. “Your song.”
“Yeah. And like I told you earlier this week, you guys can play it. If you like it, of course. It’s okay if you don’t. I understand.”
He holds up his finger in a one-minute gesture as his eyes move over the words. The smile on his face grows even bigger, if that’s possible. “Wow,” he breathes. “Raven, this is amazing.”
Every part of me grows warm. “Really?”
“Yeah. I feel it right in here.” He rubs his chest, where his heart is.
“The way you captured the beauty of friendship…it’s how I feel about my friends, too.
I don’t know if I could put it into words like you did here, but these are my thoughts and feelings exactly.
It’s like you can read my heart or something. ”
“Thanks. It means a lot that you like it. My friends were my inspiration, and you guys were the ones who gave me confidence.”
His eyes lift to me. “We were?”
“Yeah. I never really felt comfortable sharing my songs with anyone, not even my friends. Maybe because I was insecure and embarrassed. But once I knew how much you loved the other song, I guess some of that self-doubt vanished.”
He grins again. “I’m so glad to hear that. Because your music needs to be out there in the world.”
My face flushes so hard I feel it. “I don’t know…”
“I’m serious. Obviously that’s up to you, but I’m glad the band will bring this song to life. I really can’t wait to perform it with the guys. I swear the song is magic. Maybe it’ll get us to one thousand subs,” he jokes.
“I hope so. Because you guys deserve thousands of subscribers. You’re amazing.”
“Thanks.”
I reach for my guitar that I rested on the wall. “I was playing around with the music. Want to hear it? You don’t have to use this sound if you don’t want to. I figured it wouldn’t hurt for you to at least hear it.”
“You kidding? Of course I’d love to hear your music. Honestly, I’ve been dying to hear you play since I saw the guitar in your room. I haven’t heard you since camp.”
“Trust me, I’ve improved a lot since then. I hope,” I add with a nervous laugh.
He waves his hand. “Don’t sweat it. I’m sure you’re phenomenal.”
“Uh…don’t make fun of my terrible singing.”
“Never.”
“I mean, I kind of deserve it because I keep making fun of your terrible British accent.”
He shakes his head. “I’d never make fun of your singing.”
“Okay. Thanks.”
I take another deep breath, and then I strum my guitar, starting with the intro which is only music, and then adding in the singing.
I don’t look up at Kylen as I play and sing because I don’t want his expression to mess me up.
I’ll be able to tell if he thinks the song is terrible or if I sound horrible.
And I want to do the song justice by performing it the way I see it in my mind and feel it in my heart.