CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Castor
I made it through three lights before I pulled over, needing to soak in the last few hours.
Nova Williams had me in the palm of her hand.
I couldn’t explain how happy it made me to see her so relaxed, her strength undeniable – Nova had helical disease.
Every time the blue glow had lit her complexion during our date, she’d curved her lips and shut me up with a kiss.
She’d shared a part of herself with me that she’d previously hidden.
It felt like she’d let me in. I wanted to know more of her secrets, meet her family.
I tried not to let it bother me that she hadn’t let me walk her to her door.
At least I’d made it to taking her home.
She wasn’t ready, and she was right – I hadn’t told my family yet.
I put the car back in drive and listened to Lila Bloom’s ‘Starlight’ the entire ride home.
As I walked into the house, I stopped and did a little dance right there on the garage steps.
I didn’t want the high of the date to end.
I started to call Nova, to see if she wanted to watch a movie together over FaceStream.
I jerked to a stop as the door opened. Perla.
‘It looks like this might become a tradition of ours – me finding you lovestruck after your dates.’ She raised a brow knowingly.
‘It was so good –’
‘I’m sorry, Cas. I want to hear all about it, but your grandfather needs to see you. Now.’
I sighed and followed Perla as she power-walked through the house to the dining room, where Grandfather was waiting with Jacinta and Gemma.
I’d been summoned many times before, but this felt different.
His tie and dress shirt were undone. He sat at the head of the table, fuming, white-knuckled fingers gripping his solisTablet.
‘Did you contact your Pain Carrier?’
‘Oh.’ I cleared my throat. I’d planned to bring up wanting to thank my Carrier with him after the Surf Cup.
I needed to practice the speech, pick the perfect moment when he’d be most likely to say yes.
‘Not yet. I was hoping you could help me connect with whoever it is so I can show my gratitude, say thank you.’
‘Like this?’
He slid the tablet across the table, and Gemma flinched. On the holoscreen were pictures of Nova and me all over Starshade. My stomach lurched. It’d happened so fast, but that wasn’t the worst part. The bold headline filled the screen: CASTOR FOX CAUGHT ENTANGLED WITH HIS PAIN CARRIER.
‘No, that’s not …’ I couldn’t get the words out.
That couldn’t be. That was impossible. My hands shook.
Out of everyone in the Freedom System – the United States of the West and its territories.
Thousands of cities, millions of people – my match couldn’t possibly live down the bay from me.
It couldn’t be her. It was impossible. It wasn’t allowed.
‘I just got off a call with a journalist inquiring about your new girlfriend,’ said Grandfather. His voice dripped with disgust.
‘This isn’t possible,’ I stammered. ‘This isn’t real.’ I couldn’t wrap my head around it, or my words. I’d just watched Nova carry someone’s pain with so much strength and grace. I’d told her how attractive I’d found it. It was my pain. ‘No. This isn’t –’
My phone chimed.
Hot-Pink Seven-Speed
Have you seen Starshade? Did you know? Is it true?
Heat drained from my face.
Castor
NO. I mean yes, I’ve seen it. No, I didn’t know. I don’t know.
Castor
Give me one sec, I’ll come back by your house to get you
Castor
I’m so sorry
Gemma spoke up. ‘The journalist is digging into Nova’s life and plans to publish a follow-up story claiming she’s your Pain Carrier. It won’t matter if it’s true or not, the speculation alone is enough to make people run with it.’
I exhaled, afraid to let relief creep in. ‘You said claiming Nova’s my Pain Carrier.’
My fingers dug into my palms, my grip tightening. I clung to that small sliver of hope. The journalist was wrong. He had to be wrong. ‘So, it’s not true.’
‘Oh, it is. One hundred per cent.’ Jacinta snapped her gaze to mine. ‘Your little friend is your Pain Carrier. Congratulations – you didn’t need Grandfather’s help. You found her.’
‘Are you serious?’ I fumed. ‘You think that’s why I went out with Nova? I had no idea. Are you – are you sure? It can’t –’
‘Do you ever stop and think about us before you act?’ Her voice was raised.
‘Think about you? Why would I –’ I stopped short, not wanting to argue. ‘How would I have known? The Carrier and the Giver can’t be in the same city.’
Gemma cleared her throat. ‘As part of the Pain Giver Comfort program, I reviewed your potential matches. She was the only one with your rare blood type. We waived the proximity requirement, but the no-contact clause still stands.’
I stepped back as if I’d taken a blow to the gut. My gaze met Grandfather’s. This was what he meant. The rule we broke so I could get rid of my pain. This was my fault.
‘I didn’t recognize her name,’ Gemma continued. ‘I would’ve –’
‘You never should’ve been below the glassways to meet this girl in the first place,’ Jacinta interrupted.
‘Do you understand how damning this will be for us – for everything your grandfather has worked for? If people think they can contact their Pain Carriers – if Pain Givers lose their anonymity – it undermines the Freedom Systems in its entirety.’
‘I don’t get it.’ I took a moment to process everything.
Nova was my Pain Carrier. She was the reason I had my life back, and she still had hers.
There was no reason this had to be an issue.
‘Why is it so bad to lose anonymity? I can’t be the only person who’d want to thank their Carrier.
Why can’t this just be a shift to being optional? ’
Grandfather shook his head. ‘I don’t expect you to understand.
Not yet. Dominion has these measures in place for a reason.
Your mother is right. This story could open floodgates we need to keep closed.
We are so close to that international treaty, the new pain medication trials.
You having helical disease ended up being good for us.
Sign-ups for Pain Carriers have increased exponentially. We need to maintain that upward climb.’
‘What we need from you, Castor,’ Jacinta stressed, ‘is for you to trust us and follow the path laid out for you. It’s not hard, no matter how much you seem to think it is.’
I held my tongue. There were so many things I wanted to say.
I cracked my neck, as if the release of pressure might quell the anger rising in my veins.
My skin felt like it was on fire, and this time there was no helical disease to blame.
And it wasn’t just Jacinta’s words. Grandfather had said my pain had been good for the company.
Those words had left his mouth. My suffering was his profit.
‘We can all take a step back and assess how to move forward.’ Grandfather said, straightening his collar.
‘I apologize for letting my anger steer this conversation. But now that we all understand what’s at stake, we can focus on making things right.
’ He motioned to Perla, who stepped forward, apology written across her face as she held out her hand.
I didn’t need to ask. ‘Can I call Nova first? I need to talk to her.’
‘That is exactly what we don’t want, grandson. Not yet.’
I surrendered my phone to Perla, and she gave me the smallest nod.
As she left the room, Della Powers walked in wearing sweats and a loose tee.
Grandfather had summoned her straight from whatever relaxing weekend plans she’d thought she had.
My life would be hell until she left. She tucked her short, light-brown bob behind her ears.
‘I hear you need me for damage control.’
Castor
Hi Nova, this is Perla. I work for Castor’s family.
Hot Pink Seven-Speed
Is everything OK?
Castor
Castor is fine. He’s on a 48-hour communications blackout – no phones or tablets.
Hot-Pink Seven-Speed
Is this about the pictures? Is the headline true?
Three dots bubbled up.
Castor
I can’t say. But it’ll be over soon.