31. Jackson
31
jackson
We finish our set with our most popular song off the new album, and the crowd goes crazy for it. The whole place pulses with a steady rhythm, and the crowd goes wild even after we stop playing. That’s one of my favorite parts of the night. That final applause before we leave the stage always sinks its teeth into me. There’s something about the roaring energy that reverberates off each and every molecule under my skin, making my entire body buzz with new energy.
Tonight, I don’t soak it up the way I usually do, though. Because as I scan the back of the room to check for Margot and Mya, all I see is a petite girl with pink hair at the table. At first, I think maybe it’s the lights. Maybe I just can’t see Margot under the glare. But the longer I look, the more my anxiety sets in. Where did she go? Why would she leave Mya?
My thoughts race as I scan the crowd, but I don’t see any sign of her. It isn’t until I turn to exit the stage with the guys, that I spot the gorgeous redhead standing on the side of the stage, waiting for me. Everything in me relaxes at the sight of her. She tilts her head against one of the rafters with a smile that makes me feel better than any applause .
Holding the neck of my guitar in one hand, I wrap my free arm around Margot’s shoulders to pull her to me and kiss the side of her head. “Why didn’t you stay with Mya?”
She looks up at me, wrapping her arm around my waist. “And miss out on having the best seat in the house?” She shakes her head. “Once things calmed down, she said she didn’t need my help anymore, so I came to enjoy the view.”
I let out a huff. “The view.”
Margot points over her shoulder toward the merch table. “Do you want me to tell you how many Jackson photos we sold tonight?”
I grimace. “Please don’t.”
Those photos are probably my least favorite thing Mya has come up with, but I can’t say anything because she sells them like candy. Thinking about all the people who have that random ass picture of me somewhere with my chicken scratch signature near my head feels equal parts awesome and fucking weird.
“Did you have fun?” I ask to change the subject.
She smiles up at me, and it packs a bigger punch than I expected. I knew having her here would feel incredible. But now that it’s happening, it’s so much better than I thought it would be. And the fact that she’s only here for a short time feels like a bucket of ice water hanging in the balance. I know it will crash into me and wake me up in a matter of hours, but I wish this could never end. I wish this were my reality when I walked off stage every night.
“Of course! You’re right, Mya is awesome.”
I’m grateful Mya was on her best behavior. The last thing I need is for her to scare Margot away with one of her games of Twenty Questions or telling her how lovesick I am while she’s away. “She’s something.”
“I’m going to head back that way. She might get a rush of people now that your set is done. Meet me by the table? ”
I kiss her forehead. “Yeah, just give me a few minutes to pack up.”
Margot releases me and leans around me to call out to the guys. “Great show tonight!”
A chorus of “Thanks, Margot,” rings out behind me, but I can’t take my eyes off her. I can’t believe she came all this way just to see me. She’s not bothered by the fact that I can’t spend a ton of time with her alone. She isn’t trying to rush out of here now that our set is finished. She’s like the perfect missing piece to this crazy puzzle, and I love her even more for it.
She turns on her heels and heads back for the table, and I blink when I feel Dave clasp a hand on my shoulder.
“She’s a good one,” Dave says. “Don’t fuck it up.”
I look over my shoulder and lift a brow at him.
“Speaking from experience. You know, since I fucked my shit up with Lynn.”
“Yeah . . . want to tell me what happened there?”
Dave rubs the back of his neck, his shoulder length blonde hair damp with sweat like my own. “I wish I knew. I think she thought the band was winding down, and when it started picking up . . . it just went against her expectations, I guess.”
This is the most he’s opened up about his breakup since we’ve been on the road, so I try to tread carefully. “She wanted a white picket fence?”
He lets out a huff of laughter. “Exactly.” Lifting his gaze, he quickly adds, “And I want that, too. Eventually. But to pass up on all this? I just couldn’t bring myself to do it, and she didn’t want to wait around more than she already has. I get it. We’re not as young as we used to be, but you’ve got to go when the lightning strikes, you know?”
I don’t know. Not really. Settling down feels like some distant, far-off place that I may or may not go. Sometimes I forget that as long as I’ve wanted this, Dave has wanted it longer. Hell, all the guys have. I lucked out. My band got picked up to go on tour after mere weeks, but these guys have been waiting for this same chance for years.
Reading through my hesitation, Dave laughs. “You and Margot are lucky. You’re both young. You’ve got nothing tying you down or holding you back. You haven’t built a life yet—in a good way. You’ve got nothing but time and freedom.”
“I guess I never thought of it like that.” Balancing the tour and my relationship with Margot feels hard, but hearing Dave talk about it makes it sound like we have the perfect setup. Maybe we do. Maybe it isn’t a bad thing that Margot and I got together right before I left. Maybe it was perfect timing.