Chapter 3
Chapter Three
Kassie
TeaBagTitan: Looking a little sluggish this afternoon, Kassassin.
Irolled my eyes as my feet trudged through the swampy area of the battlefield. My character was fast. The only weakness of most characters was the swamp area, and my bag of tricks had nothing to help me fly over it.
And TeaBag knew that because I had to use it to jump over his massive ogre, which was obviously compensating for something. The other subs in the chat said otherwise, but they may not have had much to compare it to.
I cringed.
That was judgmental. Bad Kassie, bad.
“Oh, little TeaBag, you’re just jealous your ogre can’t fudge my elf with your tumor dick,” I snickered into my microphone. A blast came from my right, and the chat went wild. The enemy had launched an attack.
“What the fuck!”
NotmyProblem: There was a silent signal in the swamp.
I<3GothChiks: You need to head north, toward the next encampment.
My heart raced as the blast shook the ground beneath my character, taking away some of her health. She stumbled but quickly regained her footing. The chaos in the chat only added to the confusion.
I glanced at the highlighted, most-paid subs cheering me on, and of course, one of the high-ranking gamers’ names was highlighted as well.
TeaBagTitan: HaHa! Speechless now, aren’t you, kitten?
I snarled, my eyes flashing into the camera, my fangs reflecting the harsh ring light.
TeaBagTitan: Oh, here come the claws.
GlitchWarden: Don’t listen to him, keep going.
OopsIDiedAgain: Yeah. He mad he can’t put his thang between your…
I sighed and shook my head. I immediately returned to the game, and everyone else faded from my memory. There was another flash, this time to my left, and red. It wasn't the usual blue.
My computer controlled the lights, so my entire room would light up, and it felt like I was in the middle of a war zone.
The red light lit up the room again, but there was no hit on the screen.
I put my character on autopilot and turned around. The blasts of magic and the clang of swords still echoed in my headset. Even then, the chat kept pinging.
The slow blinking red light was still going, and I thought back to when I actually had a red light.
Red didn’t match my aesthetics. Black, purple, green, maybe blue or some other cool color, but red?
The pings on the computer flooded in, and the battle cry of the game ending came up on the computer. I turned back to see that my character had made it without me.
TeaBagTitan: Remind me not to play this game. If Kassassin can play it without looking at the screen, it must be too easy.
I scoffed. “No, if you have the right tools, such as the Compass of Divine Light, you can make it on your own.” The chat pinged off again, defending me. My subs always did; they were devoted. Either to the game, or my boobaly boobs bouncing, or the commentary; we would never really know.
TeaBagTitan: Whatever you say, KassieNova. I know the real reason you have subs. And it isn’t because of talent…
The gasp I gusped!
“How freaking dare you come on my channel and type that!” I crossed my arms under my chest. “Do you hear what he said, everyone?”
The chat flooded in. Some agreed with him, but said they would still pay me no matter what.
Um, thanks?
Others said I had talent, an outstanding personality and was a real entertainer, which was what these channels were about. Not just games, but making people smile.
“You know what?” I held my hand up. “Why don’t we have a game later? You and me. Winner takes all the sub-money.”
And if TeaBag’s subs came to watch, it would be a payday for me.
There was silence on the other side. Subs were jeering and calling him a coward.
I<3GothChiks: Like I said all along, wanna-be-surfer-boy-small-dick syndrome.
Gods, I loved them.
TeaBagTitan: Alright, KassieNova. Saturday night, 9 p.m. Game of my choosing. Be there.
TeaBagTitan has left the chat.
I squealed and clapped my hands. While I was a pretty good gamer, TeaBagTitan was ranked significantly higher than me. People liked to watch him play—shirtless—and he was charismatic. This would be a chance to get new subs if people liked me.
Definitely needed to make sure my titties were boobily bouncing for Saturday!
Again, the red light blinked; I whipped my head around and saw nothing.
I needed to figure out what that was.
I quickly told my subs goodbye, thanked them for their contributions, and tossed my headphones on the desk. The room was mostly dark; the LED lights and computer were still flickering.
Again, the red light flashed, and this time I saw it come through the gap in the blackout curtains.
I stepped closer, watching the light turning on and off at weird intervals.
Was there a railroad crossing around here?
I pulled back the curtain quickly, and two large red circles stared back at me.
They were bright, yet not enough to blind me, and with the window's reflection, I saw it wasn't a lamppost or a crossing but a freaking animal.
I could only see the shoulders and the head that perched on top of them.
Four claws, leaving deep gouges in the wood, gripped tightly, while two feathery antennae swayed from its head.
I sucked in a breath… it tilted its head, and I screamed.
It chittered as its claws scrambled to hold on to the windowpane. While there was glass separating us, I could hear those cries of, “What the hell?” coming from it.
Me too, pal!
I screamed again as its claws clicked at the window ledge. I tried to get my other claw to reach the ledge for a better grip but missed. Instead, the sharp point ran down the window, giving it a high pitch scratch down the glass.
I tripped on some clothes, a tangled mess underfoot, and the world spun before I slammed into the bookshelf. The shelves behind me wobbled. As the scene unfolded, I backed away, paralyzed with panic at what was about to happen.
Because the books and figurines were piled so high, they would inevitably come crashing down.
And I watched in slow motion with my hands held out as if I could do something magical to stop the madness.
“No!!” I cried out, and not one but two of my bookshelves went crashing to the floor.
I pressed my hands on either side of my head and gritted my teeth. “It's gonna get it now!” I grabbed the wand that rolled to my feet and went to the window. “I’m gonna jab those red eyes right out!”
By the time I reached the window, the red-eyed creature was nowhere to be found. In a moment of frustration, I let my shoulders droop and slammed the wand down. “Did that really just happen?”
I stomped down the stairs, wondering where Harlow was. Surely she’d heard that? She wasn’t due to stream until later. She had a higher load of subs, so she didn’t have to put in as many hours as I did.
I growled, ready to spill what just happened and how there was a burglar, a weird animal, a stalker sub… OR maybe a monster at my windowsill.
I paused.
Ooooh! Maybe it was a monster. I rubbed my hands together. That would be pretty cool.
I wonder if it was fuckable? Because with the recent announcements from NASA saying that the aliens in space were not fuckable, monsters were the only thing that was left.
First, we would have to find out if it could talk, had a mind of its own to decide, because we weren’t doing animals here. No, sir.
I continued down the stairs. A familiar voice echoed down the hall, and I began my catty growl in the back of my throat.
“Is that you, Kassie? Come on down here! Mayor Hollow is here checking up on us. Isn’t that sweet?”
Mayor Hollow, my nemesis.
He kept wanting to make small talk yesterday at the grocery store, and I wasn’t having it. I just wanted to shop, not talk about the weather or the bylaws. I already read them.
1. Stay out of the forest.
2. Come to the parties.
Now leave me alone.
As I stepped into the kitchen, there was a fancy teapot on the table, filled with coffee—because Harlow doesn’t like tea. There was a whole carton of cream because you could never have too much, and sugar cubes nearly toppled over one of the cups.
Harlow smiled and waved me in. “You must have won! I heard you jumping up and down up there!”
I huffed. “No, I didn’t jump. My bookcases fell over.”
Harlow gasped and jumped out of her chair. “That’s terrible! Are you alright? What happened!”
Mr. Hollow tilted his head, and a crooked smile showing those weird teeth appeared.
“I fell into them, because there was something at my window and it scared the crap out of me.”
Harlow patted me down, looking for scratches. “What was at the window? Was it a bird? A squirrel? Was it one of those raccoons? I’ve started feeding them leftovers. There were five last night. I have a live camera on them, right now. There have also been skunks visiting, too.”
Harlow pulled out her phone to show me. “Aren’t they adorable! I should probably talk to them and tell them not to climb on the house. I don’t want them scaring you or anyone else.”
Mr. Hollow stood from his chair and put his spindly, spider-like fingers on Harlow’s shoulder.
I got the heebie jeebies just watching how he looked at her.
“Now, Harlow, I’m sure it was pure accident that an animal got onto Miss Kassie’s window.
A lot of the animals here are curious about all the new tenants.
Kassie, why don’t you go to Nocturne Furnishings tomorrow and request some new bookshelves?
Any you like, and tell them that the mayor sent you.
They will set you right up,” said Mayor Hollow.
My head perked up. I forgot about the furniture store. The shelves I had were cheap, so maybe they would have something sturdier. “Alright, I can do that.”
Mayor Hollow clasped his hands together. “Splendid. And I’ll see you all Friday night at the party, correct? First one with both of you there.”
I walked to the fridge and opened it, poking my head inside. “Mhmm.” I grabbed a piece of coffee cake and shoved it into my mouth.
“Don’t worry, she will be there!” Harlow chirped.
I peeked over the door to see Harlow saluting Mayor Hollow.
He chuckled to himself and patted her head. “Good girl. I will check on you later.”
Harlow’s eyes went wide as she watched the tall, lanky, bald-headed man walk out the door.
No. No. No. No!
“Harlow!” I hissed. “What was that! You don’t like him, do you?”
Harlow gasped. “Me? Like the mayor? What? No! He was just coming to see how we are, settling in and all. He also dropped off some flowers I had never seen before. He said he gives them to all the new residents.”
My face deadpanned. “Uh, huh, sure.”
She brought the flowers from the entryway. They were black and deep-pink roses in a glass vase. All tied together with a gold ribbon. “Aren’t they pretty? He said he grew them himself.”
I huffed in annoyance. “Didn’t take him for a gardener, nor did I take you for having a live camera feed on some animals.”
Harlow shrugged her shoulders. “Why wouldn’t I?” She feigned innocence. “Besides, we both know it isn’t just for the animals. I will have one pointing toward the bedroom windows from now on.” She put up her hand, and I gave her a high-five. We both then gave each other a wicked smile.