29. Stefan
29
STEFAN
“What the fuck are you doing here?” I sneer at Alicia, my tone giving away exactly how I feel at seeing her. As if today hasn’t been enough of a clusterfuck, now I need to deal with this lying bitch too.
“I … umm …”
“You, umm, what?” I snap at her.
“Tyrone left me,” she cries. “I have nothing now.”
“Not my problem, Alicia.”
“But—”
“No, no buts,” I interrupt. “You lied to me. You made me think he was mine. You made me fall in love with a baby that wasn’t mine. You caused me to grieve a loss that wasn’t even mine to grieve. You deserve everything you get. Now, get the fuck off my property.”
“Stefan, please,” she pleads, reaching for me. Wrenching my arm away, I snap through clenched teeth, “Get the fuck off my property, Alicia.” Then I add, “Or I’ll call the police and have you arrested for trespassing and harassment.”
She blankly stares at me, and after what feels like an eternity, she nods and turns. She takes her sorry ass off my front porch and walks away from me and out of my life. Shaking my head, I pull my keys out of my pocket and unlock the door.
Walking inside, the first thing I see is the ultrasound picture on the side table. It used to sit on the fridge under the hockey stick magnet I’ve had since I went to my first game when I was seven.
Picking up the photo, my eyes well with tears as I look at the grainy picture of the little boy who I thought was mine. I don’t know what hurts more, the fact he died? Or that he wasn’t mine?
Grabbing a bottle of bourbon from the wet bar and the ultrasound image, I slide down the wall and bring the bottle to my mouth and chug. I relish the burn, but it does little to ease how I’m feeling. How can I grieve someone who wasn’t mine? I’m hurt. I’m pissed off. I’m broken. I’m … every other feeling out there and then some.
My life is a mess.
Half the bottle is gone and my vision is blurry when I hear the front door open and close.
A fuzzy figure appears above me and they squat down in front of me. “Ohhh, Stefan,” they coo and take the bottle from my hand and then they walk away. When they come back, a cool plastic bottle of water is placed in my hand and a soft voice commands, “Drink.”
And for the second time today, I do as I’m told.
Taking a sip, I lift my gaze and the fuzzy image comes into focus. A smile graces my face when I see it’s Wren. She drops to her butt next to me and stretches out her legs. A comfortable silence falls between us. We sit next to each other in the entry, each of us in our own heads. After a while, she shuffles beside me and I smile again when her thigh presses against mine, but that smile disappears when she speaks. “You really fucked up today, Stefan.”
“Just today?” I retort, resting my head on her shoulder.
“Well…” Then she shrugs and my head bounces. She doesn’t say anything else because what’s there to say? We all know I’m not handling this very well, but how do you deal with something like this? “This doesn’t happen in real life, it’s only supposed to happen in TV shows,” I mumble.
“I knew you liked daytimes soaps,” she teases me and I can’t help but chuckle.
“Shhhh, don’t tell anyone. It’s my secret guilty pleasure.”
“It’s not so secret when it appears in the recently watched section.”
Another chuckle escapes me. “You’ll keep my secret, won’t you, Wren?”
“This secret I will keep for you, but you need to promise me something.”
Lifting my head from her shoulder, I look over at her. The water has helped to sober me up but then again, I’ve only had half a bottle tonight. “What am I promising?”
“That you’ll talk to me or someone instead of drinking and fucking your way through your grief.”
“Okay,” I tell her with a nod.
She shuffles to her knees and takes my hands in her. “Promise me, Stefan? I don’t want to waste my time if you’re a lost cause.”
“I promise,” I vow with a nod. “I met a man tonight and he said, ‘From the darkness, light will prevail’ and I think he’s right because it can’t rain all the time.”
“Did you just quote The Crow ?” I nod and this time, it’s her who smiles. A genuine Wren smile appears on her face. When she smiles like this, it’s a sight to behold. She’s pretty all the time but when she’s smiling-smiling, she’s something else. “That was a brilliant movie and it was so sad what happened to Brandon Lee.”
“Mmmhmpf,” I agree, dropping my gaze back to my lap.
Lifting my face up to look at Wren again, her smile is gone and now I see nothing but concern. Then I feel guilty for all I’ve put her through since the shit hit the fan, well actually, since she moved in, if I’m being honest. I really am a douche and it’s time for me to lose that moniker. Dropping my gaze again, I see the ultrasound photo on the floor between us. Picking it up, I stare at the image and again my eyes well with tears. “She lied,” I murmur.
“She did,” she confirms. “But maybe it was for the best.”
“How so?” Sitting up, I shuffle around to face her and before she replies, she sits up and turns to face me too.
“Well, this way, you aren’t tied to a woman who’s wrong for you. You need someone who wants you for you. You want to have a baby with someone you love and want to grow old with. You need someone—” Cutting her off, I grip her cheeks and slam my lips to hers. She gasps, clearly, she was not expecting me to kiss her, but I take the opportunity to slip my tongue into her mouth. She’s frozen as my tongue licks into her mouth. Just when I think she’s going to shove me away, she starts to kiss me back. Her tongue pushes into my mouth and then it’s on.
Sliding my hands around her waist, I slip them under her ass and lift her onto my lap. Straddling me, we continue to kiss.
As far as kisses go, this one is perfect but as quickly as it started, it stops.
Wren pulls back and stares at me. She’s breathless. Her lips are puffy and her cheeks flushed. She quickly scrambles off my lap and stares down at me. Her mouth opens and closes but she doesn’t say anything. Instead, she turns on her heel and races across the room and up the stairs to her bedroom. Leaving me sitting here with a hard dick and … feelings I don’t know what to do with.