3. Leah
CHAPTER 3
Leah
I lost most of our so-called friends after the divorce, except Rose Rutherford.
Rose had recently moved to Angel Island in the Georgia Golden Isles, where she ran a bed and breakfast. For a while, I’d worried about her because she had left her husband, who had plenty of money and a very tight prenuptial agreement. But then Gray surprised me and Rose. He left his company and Atlanta to be with his wife. This was the first time Rose had been back since she left.
I was meeting her at Bread the fact that they didn’t even call on my birthday, check in with me, or…return my calls and messages hurt hard.
“Any change with?—”
“No,” I cut her off. I didn’t want to talk about my kids. It would make me cry, and I was so tired of being sad all the fucking time.
“You like this Marco guy?” Rose changed the topic without question.
“He’s nice.”
“Nice ?” She raised an eyebrow.
“Yes, nice,” I repeated. “And funny. And I don’t know. It’s been so long since I even noticed a man like that . But at the same time, I feel ridiculous. Like, who am I kidding? He’s probably not even interested.”
“Why would you say that?”
“He’s really handsome, and look at me.”
She frowned, setting her cappuccino down. “I am looking at you.”
“I’m old.” My voice cracked slightly, but I got it under control. “I’m in my mid-forties. My body’s not what it used to be. I’m carrying several extra pounds, and my face—God, I look tired all the time. Why would any man want me when there are younger, prettier women everywhere?”
Rose leaned forward, her elbows on the table, her gaze steady. “Leah. Stop .”
I swallowed hard and took a deep breath, trying to let all that negativity and self-loathing go…somehow make it vanish. But they had been my constant companions for years.
“Sometimes I want to kill Kevin,” she muttered. “He’s an asshole. He made you feel less about yourself. But you were never less. I admire you so much. You made your life yours—no matter how he treated you. And yes, his attacks on you left scars. But they don’t make you less. They make you more . You’ve survived things that would have broken most people, and you’re still here. You’re strong, and you’re kind, and you’re more beautiful than you know. Any man who can’t see that isn’t worth a second of your time.”
“Laying it on a little thick, aren’t you, hon?” I joked, not wanting to dwell on the bad, and instead move on to the good. I was seeing Rose again after a long time. This was the moment I wanted to live in. Seeing her happy made my heart lighter.
She didn’t take the hint or rather decided not to let me off the hook. “Do you think I didn’t feel like that after I left Gray?” she went on. “There were days I looked in the mirror and thought, ‘This is it. This is all I am now—exhausted, old, worn out.’ But that wasn’t true, Leah. It wasn’t true for me, and it’s not true for you.”
The logical part of me knew she was right, but the emotional part of me—the part that still heard Kevin’s voice telling me it was my fault that he’d cheated because he wanted excitement, and I wasn’t it.
“You know what? If Marco Cabrera makes a move, I’ll give him a shot.” I thought I was saying it to appease her, but as soon as the words were out, I knew they were also true. The man had stirred me. It felt good to be stirred .
“Now, that’s the spirit.” Rose raised a hand, and I high-fived her.
“Speaking of making moves, is that horrible assistant who kept trying to get it on with Gray still at the company?”
Rose’s face went from smiling to laughing. “Oh, I have something delicious to tell you. She confronted me last night when Gray was giving a speech, telling me I was ruining his life by making him leave his career blah blah.”
“That little bitch.” I narrowed my eyes. “What did you say?”
“Gray was giving a speech then, so I told her to shush.”
A laugh burst out of me. “You told her to… shush ?”
“Yep. And then Gray called me up on the stage and told everyone how much he loved me. It was epic.” Rose let out a breath, looking dreamy, and then she frowned. “Am I being petty?”
“Hell, yeah, and you deserve to be. That little shit was hitting on your husband and being cruel to you. So, how did she look when you told her to shut the F up?”
“Properly upset. It was wonderful,” Rose admitted.
When it was time to leave, we hugged again.
“Don’t let fear decide your life for you,” she whispered in my ear.
“I’ll try,” I promised her and to myself.