Chapter One #3
Robbie groaned. “Sorry—my afternoon is fully booked, appointments for my kid that can’t be rescheduled.
” He had a check-in scheduled at Sawyer’s school to go over his progress and integration, and then, because of course it worked out that way, they were off to the orthodontist to find out how much more the kid’s smile was going to cost. “What about tomorrow?”
Ms. Finch grunted down the line.
“So, I guess we’re meeting the day after?”
“Meeting the first day of filming is not ideal, but needs must, I guess.”
She checked that Robbie had received his instructions for filming and when and where to show up, then wished him a good day and hung up.
So he was going to be one half of a same-sex ice-dancing duo on national television.
Somehow he didn’t think that this was the unlearning of toxic masculinity and subversion of gender roles that Sawyer had in mind when he signed Robbie up for this nonsense.
He wanted Robbie to “be himself,” but specifically the version of himself he’d been on his not-so-anonymous Twitter account a decade ago.
It had been a friends-and-family handle originally, but after a while, as Robbie interacted with teammates and opponents and forgot to protect his anonymity, the fans discovered it.
Robbie had accidentally cultivated a persona prone to sass, silliness, and teasing of other players that walked up to the line of flirtation and winked at it.
Even though he was mostly joking, it had felt a little transgressive. Sawyer would’ve said “there’s lots to unpack there,” because Sawyer was a little asshole who never let Robbie keep things in their neat little boxes.
Anyway. Ice dancing with a man was a whole other level. It would piss off conservatives, which basically made it an automatic win.
Robbie shook his head, pocketed his phone, and put away the groceries. He had things to do and places to be.
At the school, Robbie talked with Sawyer’s teachers and the counsellor about how he was settling in.
Under the advice of his therapist, he had changed schools for a fresh start and to be with his best friend, Imogen.
Thank God Robbie had been able to file most of that paperwork and the school didn’t ask for court orders for Robbie to list himself as a secondary contact.
It had been a busy year for everyone, and the staff worked hard to support Sawyer and look out for him.
They’d even scrubbed his deadname from the records before Robbie could figure out how to file the paperwork for a legal name change.
So Robbie happily went to the school for meetings as often as the counsellor wanted.
With supremely ironic timing, Vince texted Robbie while he sat in his car in the school parking lot, waiting for Sawyer.
Can you take the kid this weekend?
Robbie blinked at his phone. At this point, Sawyer was all but living with him full-time. It was safer to assume he’d be at Robbie’s on the weekend than at his dad’s.
He’s here most weekends. Robbie knew Vince was absent lately, but he was pretty sure Vince knew that.
Right right but just… have him sleep over?
Robbie narrowed his eyes. Sawyer had spent the last several weekends at his house. He couldn’t remember the last time he hadn’t.
I’ll check his plans but pretty sure he was going to.
K thanks
Robbie stared at the answer, then typed out, You know you could make our lives easier if you just signed the damn paperwork. He reread his words. He deleted them.
He tapped the thumbs-up and dropped his phone in the console just as the final bell rang at 3:15. Sawyer would be here soon.
“Hey, Robbie!”
How Sawyer could bring so much movement and sound into getting into a passenger seat, Robbie wasn’t sure.
“Hey, kiddo.” Robbie turned on the car and headed east. “Ready for the orthodontist?”
“So ready,” Sawyer griped.
“You’re the one who complained about having embarrassing buck teeth,” Robbie singsonged.
Sawyer groaned, all teen melodrama.
“So I heard from Dance Your Ice Off today.”
Sawyer jerked. “What? Why? Did something happen?”
“You could say that.” Robbie caught him up on developments, grateful they’d stopped at a light so he could see Sawyer’s reaction.
“What?” Sawyer stared blankly at Robbie for a long moment.
Okay, this wasn’t the reaction Robbie had expected.
“I figured, uh, it wasn’t exactly a good look if I backed out because I suddenly had a male partner, given the charity.
” He flicked his eyes back to the light.
Still red. Suddenly he was hoping for it to change.
“So I said I’d still do it with this guy. ”
Sawyer squinted at him. “Really?”
“It’s not a big deal.” It wasn’t. Robbie had once described a fellow hockey player’s ass using a peach emoji for the whole internet to see. He’d done several Halloweens in drag. He’d fucked men! He could ice dance with one on TV.
“It’s kind of a big deal if you’re not out,” Sawyer said. “Like, it wouldn’t be a big deal if you weren’t bi, because who cares if people assume you’re gay when you’re straight. But you are, so you’re allowed to freak out about it.”
Jesus God, was this kid gentle parenting him? “I’m not freaking out about it!” Robbie said. “I’m just… letting you know. In case this interfered with your Plan.”
“Bruh. Dancing with a guy is like… way less toxic masculinity.”
Finally the light turned and Robbie hit the gas. “Even though there’s two guys?” How did that work?
There was a telling pause. “What do you think toxic masculinity is?”
Robbie wasn’t answering that. “So you’re not upset I’m gonna be dancing with this uh—this Finn guy?”
Sawyer absolutely squawked. “Wait, what? Finn? No.”
“What do you mean, no?”
“This is terrible.” Sawyer pawed at his face, slouching in the passenger seat. “Imogen is going to kill me.”
What did any of this have to do with his best friend? And what did he have against guys named Finn? “Bud, you’re going to have to fill in some blanks for me here. Preferably before we go into the orthodontist. I am flying blind.” He pulled into the parking lot.
“Uh, it’s just, uh. Okay, you know how I told you Imogen has a stepbrother who’s like, super old?”
“No?” Robbie tried. He listened when Sawyer talked—he did. But God, he could talk the ear off an elephant.
“Yeah. A former ice dancer. Named Finn. Who works on….”
Ah. “So this is going to be super awkward for you if I start ice dancing all sexy with Imogen’s brother on TV?”
“Oh my God.” Sawyer put his hands over his face. “Please never say ‘ice dancing all sexy’ ever again.”
“Sawyer, seriously. Old people have sex too—”
“Ick! I hate you, I hate you so much—”
“Kid. It’s going to be fine. I promise I won’t embarrass you in front of your friend’s brother, or whatever. Okay?”
Sawyer let out a breath so loud his lips flapped against his face. “No, it’s—you’re right, it’s fine. Besides, Finn’s way more embarrassing than you are, so, like, how cringe could it be?”
“More embarrassing than me?” That sounded fake. “Seriously?”
“Ugh.” Sawyer buried his face in his hands. “I guess you’ll see for yourself soon enough.”
Weirdly, Robbie was looking forward to it now.