Chapter 50
CHAPTER
FIFTY
GUNNER
I’m not surprised to see Rebel at the treehouse. But deep inside… I was hoping that my hunch was wrong and she wouldn’t show. Or at least that, when she did, I’d have found a way to tell her the truth.
As soon as I hear her footsteps trudging down the path, I have a moment of panic. I’ve felt this adrenaline rush before. But it’s usually during a game, when it’s down to the wire, I’m fighting for control of the puck, and there’s no one around to make the pass.
With a deep breath, I look over the railing and see Rebel climbing up the ladder. Her blonde hair dangles all the way to her back and her bangles clang musically as they crash down her arm to her elbow.
My mind is rushing with a million thoughts, but not even Uncle Clarence’s damaging revelation can stand up to Rebel’s beauty.
In another world, one where fairytales are reality, she’d be a mesmerizing woodland fairy. And she probably wouldn’t need to climb up here because she’d be able to fly.
What on earth am I thinking?
Rebel’s almost at the top of the ladder now. I allow myself the luxury of holding her hand to help her to the platform.
Her fingers are warm against mine and it truly feels like home.
How much longer can you hold on to that hand? Uncle Stewart’s words echo in my mind, a foreboding warning.
The world might say I’m too good for Rebel.
But I’ve always known it’s the opposite.
Rebel Hart is way classier than all the Kinseys combined. And when she finds out the truth, her small, delicate hand will never, ever reach for mine again.
When Rebel’s on steady ground, I remove my hand from hers and take a few steps back. My eyes dart to the shadowy treetops below us, marking a clear path over everything but her face.
The darkness of the night surrounds me. I thought the world would be brighter this high up. Up here, we should be closer to the sky. But the silver streaks from the moon are choked to death by the forest around us and the stars cower behind dark clouds.
“Hey,” Rebel says.
I look at her and my chest squeezes tightly.
“Are you…” She nibbles on her bottom lip. “I won’t even ask. I can see you’re not okay.”
This is it.
Whether I like it or not, the moment has come.
I need to tell her.
I open my mouth, but the words won’t shake loose. My tongue is heavier than the stones on the forest floor and my brain screeches to a halt.
Rebel walks over to me. I hear her footsteps thudding and my heartbeat slows to match the rhythm of her steps.
“You want to count the stars with me?” Rebel asks in a quiet hush.
My eyes lift to hers and fall into liquid blues that were plucked straight out of heaven.
She smiles encouragingly and leads me further into the treehouse where there are less branches obstructing the view. Stooping down, she yanks on my hand until I join her on the floor. The planks are hard against my back and the earthy scent of wood and moss overwhelms me.
“Look at how many stars are out tonight,” Rebel observes, her voice low and filled with awe.
I let my hands relax at my sides, staring at the constellations. The truth still looms over me but, having Rebel here, I feel I can breathe for a moment.
“Want to know a fun fact I learned about stars lately?” Rebel asks.
I grunt.
Her shirt rustles as she moves. I sense her watching me, but I don’t look her way. Instead, I train my eyes on the scattered lights suspended through the night.
“At the last home game, Gordie and I were talking about stars. She said they’re constantly in motion. I said they weren’t. Then I looked it up and, turns out, a first grader is smarter than me.”
“I wouldn’t recommend getting into a trivia fight with her, especially when it comes to space. Or hockey.” Whatever Renthrow feeds Gordie makes her brain ten times bigger than the average kid.
Rebel chuckles and returns her attention to the night sky. “Stars are kind of sad, aren’t they? So pretty and bright, but in reality, they don’t choose where they want to go. They’re just caught in the riptide of a giant, cosmic wave.”
I make a low sound in my throat.
“We might not be as brilliant as the stars,” Rebel says thoughtfully, “but at least we can choose our own direction.”
“Keep your mouth shut and nothing has to change,” Uncle Clarence growled after telling me everything in the orchard today. “You really want to see the Kinseys crumble? You really want to be the reason your family suffers?”
“Even if, in the moment, the waves are bigger than we are and we’re being ripped apart by the tide…”
“Think of all your father’s done for this town. Think of all your mother’s accomplished. Everything you have, everything you are, you owe to them.”
“We have the power to change course. I think… I think that’s the way we shine in the greatest darkness,” Rebel finishes.
My fingers curl into fists. The truth is going to rip the rug out from under my entire family. There will be no taking it back. The moment I pull the trigger, everything goes boom.
It’s the right thing to do.
But that doesn’t make it easy.
Suddenly, Rebel rolls closer. My breath hitches as she props her arm up and rests her chin against her fist, looking at me beneath thick lashes. The gemstone necklace I gifted her dangles from her neck and swings like a pendulum trying to hypnotize me. But I don’t need a swinging motion to be put under Rebel’s spell.
I’m already there.
I’m already hers.
“You don’t have to tell me anything, Gunner. Not if it tears you up this much. I truly don’t ever need to know.”
My eyebrows climb to the top of my head and I stare at her. She’s giving me a way out, a free pass, a ticket to easy street. Keeping this truth to myself is a much smoother road than the one I’m preparing myself to take.
“I’m happy, right here. Right now. With you. I don’t need anything else,” she promises.
Moved, I slide my fingers over the back of her neck and pull her down for a kiss. Our lips move in tandem, tender yet urgent. I slip my other hand over her back, losing half my mind when she mewls and arches into me.
I kiss her harder.
Faster.
Because this might be the last time I ever get to taste her lips.
Rebel tilts her head, inching down a bit as she matches the rhythm of my kisses. I realize the way she’s angling her head down to meet me is uncomfortable. Without removing my lips from hers, I roll her over me and wrap both arms around her waist.
She’s so soft it’s enough to send my pulse into overdrive. My heart beats fast enough to rocket straight through my ribs, past my skin, and spark fireworks in the night sky.
The franticness of my touch doesn’t seem to bother her, so I don’t hold back. I nip at her full bottom lip, skate my tongue across the inner lining of her mouth and kiss her like I’ll die if I have to stop.
Briiiing!
The sharp tone of her phone going off fills the night air.
Our lips rip apart with a pop.
“ Your phone?” Rebel pants, her eyes a bit glazed.
If the truth wasn’t looming over our heads like an ancient guillotine, seeing that dazed expression would fill me with a great deal of satisfaction.
But as I lose the warmth of her lips, cold reality quickly chases away the fire of her touch.
“It’s mine,” Rebel says, touching her pocket.
She plants her hands on either side of my body and tries to push herself up, but I grip her wrist to keep her lying on top of me. She flashes me a confused look, shakes her head and then an indulgent smile teases over her face.
“Answer it later,” I demand.
I’m not ready to let her go yet.
My fingers stroke the curve of her cheek and the shape of her ear. I push aside her hair, tucking it behind her ear, and the strands that spilled against my shirt like golden fabric shift away.
Briiiing!
With a groan, Rebel sits up. “Let me check just in case.”
I allow her to sit up and I sit up too.
“It’s mom.” Her hooded eyes suddenly fling open. “Oh my gosh. I told her I was going to the store and I’d be right back.”
Rebel clears her throat a few times and then picks up the call. In a forced, casual voice, she coos, “Hey, mom.”
“Where are you? What on earth happened? I was this close to calling the police, Rebel!” Mrs. Hart’s voice is so loud that I can hear her through the phone’s tiny speakers.
Rebel winces and looks over at me helplessly.
I shrug and shake my head.
She scrunches her nose, waits a beat for her mother to calm down and then says, “Sorry, mom. I, uh, got lost in the grocery store.”
“Lost!” Mrs. Hart rails. “For two hours, Rebel?”
“Sorry, mom. We’ll have movie night another time. I promise I’ll make it up to you. Bye, love you!” Without giving her mother room to cut in, Rebel ends the call. “Whew.” She sighs. “I completely forgot about movie night.”
“If you were with your mom, why did you come looking for me?” I ask. My hand moves to the side of her neck, stroking along her jawline.
“Because I heard your Uncle Clarence was in town.”
My thumb freezes on her.
Rebel looks up beneath a fringe of thick lashes. “I have a confession to make. I, uh, already know what you’re so nervous to tell me. I already know what he did.”
My hand falls away from her.
No, she doesn’t.
She has no idea.
“It’s okay, Gunner.” She takes my hand in hers. “I’m not saying we should write off what happened. Your uncles are shady. That’s undeniable, but honestly, I feel relieved that it wasn’t anything worse.”
I blink slowly.
I have never, and will never , love anyone the way I love Rebel Hart.
She’ll be my one and only until the day I die.
But I can’t keep hiding the truth just so I can keep her in my life.
I need to tell her.
Slowly, I pull my hand away from hers and admit, “It is.”
She looks flustered by me pulling away and asks distractedly, “It is… what?”
“Something worse.”