Chapter 30
“Macushla,” Kieran whispered to Logan, “I was wanted and loved!”
Logan squeezed his mate. “By the sound of it, very much so, mo anan cara, never forget that.”
“I won’t, promise.” Kieran turned back to Oracle and asked, “What happened then?”
“The man you call your father found you shortly after your mother died. Deciding to claim you as his own, he buried your mother and took you home to his wife,” said Oracle.
“My mother is buried near the tree where I was found?”
“Yes, he buried her under the spot he found you.”
“Logan, I have to see my mother’s grave, I mean, I know we were just there, but I didn’t know my mother was buried there. Oh, can we mark her grave somehow, so she is not a nameless soul. Oh no, I don’t know her name!” Kieran looked at Logan, pain once again on his face.
“Oracle, do you know the name of Kieran’s mother?”
“I have one more thing for you Kieran,” Oracle said, handing him the small bag at her feet.
“What’s this?” Kieran asked.
“Open it and see, mo anan cara,” Logan said, pretty sure he knew what it was.
Taking the bag, Kieran opened it, looked inside, and pulled out a baby blanket bundle. Setting the bag down, he unwrapped the bundle and found an infant’s outfit and a yellowed note. Glancing at Oracle, he asked, “From my mother?”
“Yes, and the outfit your mother made for you along with the blanket she wrapped you in.”
Kieran’s hands trembled as he carefully unfolded the note. He looked at the handwriting, running his fingertips over it, seeking to touch his mother. Finally, he began to read:
My darling son,
The day you were born was the happiest day of my and your father’s life.
We waited so long for a pup of our own and we were finally blessed with you…
the best pup in the world. Your father took one look at you with your bright blue eyes and shock of dark hair and decided to call you Kieran.
He held you your entire first day of life, smothering you with kisses and love, never wanting to let go of you.
Alas, life faded from his body. But before he died, he told you how much he loved you and wished for you a life filled with joy and happiness.
You and I cried together as your father was buried, but I promised you at his gravesite that I would protect you always, as he had wanted to do.
But the Fates had a different plan for me, a plan that would never allow me to keep my promise to you.
So, I passed your protection on to the gods and Fates who swore to keep you safe from harm, and if you are reading this letter, then be assured they kept their promise to me.
How can I possibly convey in this letter how much I love you?
I can’t. But understand my love for you is so great and strong it would allow me to fight dragons for you or to scale the highest mountain to find you, but because I won’t be here to do those things, I’m giving you all of my love to carry in your heart to feel and use whenever you need your mother.
I’m sorry I will never see you grow up or meet your mate or hold your children and if I had the power to change anything, it would be to be there for you, to love you, to hug you, to guide and protect you through all of life’s struggles.
My last wish on this earth is for you to be happy and find love.
If it is granted, your father and I will be at peace in the afterlife where we will be waiting to see you again.
All of my love forever my son.
Your mother, Caitlín.
Logan took the letter from Kieran, setting it down on the side table, then pulled his mate tight to his chest and covered him with a throw from the back of the sofa.
There were no words he could give his crying mate, no comfort other than what he was doing, nothing to ease Kieran’s heartbreak other than to just be there for him.
Oracle had left the room, leaving Logan alone with his mate, his hand gently rubbing Kieran’s back, his cheek resting on his mate’s head.
~/~/~/~/~
Thomas showed Oracle to a bedroom; she’d held herself together but after he left, she broke down, crying for Kieran’s mother and for all the mothers who would never see their pups grow up.
The pain of leaving their children too soon was something she’d never experienced but Oracle felt it deeply nonetheless.
Her phone rang and, smiling through her tears, she said, “Hello, Maximus.”
“Darling are you all right?”
“I am now.”
“What happened?”
“I just finished telling Kieran about his mother’s death. Seeing him alone, without a mother, just hit me hard because I know Kieran.”
“I can understand that. I remember how I felt when my father died but at least I was old enough to know him before he did.”
“Yes, today reinforced how fortunate we are to be alive to see our sons grown, happy and at least one mated with a family.”
“Let’s not forget how lucky we are to have Daniel in our lives,” said Maximus.
“Yes, we are.”
“How long will you be in Ireland, darling? I miss you.”
“Maybe another day. It depends on Kieran. I left him and Logan after he read his mother’s letter because he needed to come to terms with what I told him. Logan is taking very good care of his mate, but I will have to stay here until I finish my job.”
“I understand. I love you, darling.”
“And I, you.”
“Call me when you are ready to come home. Daniel and I are missing you very much.”
“I will. It should not be too much longer. And Max, thank you for always being there when I need you.”
“Always have and always will. Love you!”
“Love you back. Bye”
~/~/~/~/~
His mother’s letter gave words to the images in his mind that had been there for as long as he could remember, and now he knew what they were.
Cocooned by his mate, Kieran relived his life with his parents, finally knowing who he was and why he became what he was.
There was more to tell Logan, but for now he was happy to be surrounded by his mate’s arms and love.
He sent a silent message to his parents, letting them know he was happy and loved.
Logan kept silent while his mate grieved for the parents he never really knew; this was a journey Kieran had to take by himself.
He’d made the same trip when his mother and his siblings were massacred and, as he found out, nobody can do it for you—nor are there any shortcuts that can lessen the pain.
So, he waited, holding his mate until Kieran’s tears subsided before he spoke.
“Babe, I’m very sorry about what happened to your parents as I’d have loved to meet them. ”
“Thanks, I know they would have loved you,” murmured Kieran, then waving his hand at the letter.
“I never expected any of this, but it is the best gift I ever received, after you, even though my tears would lead you to believe otherwise.” Looking around he noticed they were alone, and asked, “Where’s Oracle? I want to thank her.”
“Thomas showed her to a bedroom, so she could rest. Do you want me to ask her to come back?”
“Yeah, but first I want to tell you what I am, if that’s okay,” said Kieran.
“Whatever you want, babe.”
“According to my Shaman, the gods and Fates sent Jophiel, an angel, to give me the powers I have. They are permanent and will be passed onto any pups I may have.”
“What powers exactly are you talking about?”
“I have the power to remove negative emotions, to give shifters hope or to let them know they are loved. While I was at Arald’s, I used the powers with all the prisoners every day to help them survive.”
“How do you do this?”
“By touching them, usually just with a hand, but in the case of Cody, I had to hug him because he had so much guilt I needed to remove.”
“You used your powers on Cody? Why?”
“Cody felt guilty he wasn’t able to rescue me sooner and even though Dylon and I tried to convince him it wasn’t his fault, he couldn’t believe it, so I absorbed all his guilt, freeing him from a lifetime of suffering.”
“Does Cody know you did this?”
“Yes, after it was over, he told me he’d had a vision about who I was but had forgotten it when his visions grew more painful.”
“Who else knows who you are?”
“Well, Oracle, and Dylon—but Dylon only because the Fates linked him to Cody to help him protect his mate.”
“Do your parents know?”
“No! They believe I was trained as a Shaman, which I was, but my Shaman cautioned me that I wasn’t to tell anyone except my Fated Mate.”
“What happens to the guilt you removed from Cody? Is it in you now?”
“No, if I remove negative emotions from a shifter, they are in me only for a short time and then fade away.”
“You said when you met your Fated Mate your powers would grow to full strength. What did you mean by that?”
“The powers I received from Jophiel are complete, but weak…I can do things like that with Cody or the prisoners, but nothing more. The gods and Fates wanted to create a supercharged Shaman whose sole purpose was to give light to the darkest part of a shifter’s soul, to fill it with compassion, hope and love.
But they decided to make the full powers conditional on me finding my Fated Mate.
I don’t know why, exactly, but according to my Shaman it has to do with making sure I was protected. ”
“I understand that, believe me. It has already crossed my mind about how I’m going to protect you.”
Smiling at Logan, Kieran said, “I think it’s why I was given a spirit also. I only ignored my spirit’s warning once about the danger I was in and I ended up at Arald’s. I will never make that mistake again.”
“Is that why your spirit joined with my wolf?”
“Yes, so it can tell you if something bad might happen to me.”
“What exactly is our spirit?”
“It is my guardian and helper and now it is yours also. You can ask it questions, seek help and a myriad of other things. You already know it will tell you where I am, and it will tell me where you are. It transcends time and space and can do many wondrous things. For instance, it made sure my scent wasn’t appealing in order to protect me and then, when I found you, it allowed you to smell my natural scent.
You asked me if I had a pet when I was young.
No, not in the traditional manner, but my spirit was one of sorts.
When my Shaman would allow me to play outside in the hills surrounding our home, my spirit would join me in imaginary games I invented. ”
“I like our spirit, but you better not ignore the warnings ever again,” Logan growled, giving his mate a fierce look, which caused Kieran to erupt into a fit of giggles. Glad to see his mate in a light mood, he continued, “I understand what the gods and Fates wanted but why did they need you?”
“They could see hatred growing and were afraid it would harm all shifters if it wasn’t stopped.
So as a result, I became the first Shaman to have godly powers as part of my DNA.
Only when I met my Fated Mate would those powers allow me to use my mind to help shifters change from focusing on hatred and other negative emotions and become positive… able to see the beauty in their world.
“Earlier you asked me why I wanted everyone to know I was gay and I told you it allows me to see the hatred in their hearts. When someone keeps hatred hidden, it begins to destroy the shifter from the inside out, causing a host of other negative emotions such as aggression and anger. So if I can quickly see who needs help, it makes it easier for me to use my powers of positivity to give them a better and longer life.”
“Wow, I’m so proud of you, mo anan cara. The gods and Fates picked the perfect shifter for me! I think it’s wonderful but why were you afraid to tell me?”
Kieran was wringing his hands, nervous about his mate’s reaction; he knew how possessive Logan could be. “Because I touch other shifters a lot and from what I learned, my Fated Mate wouldn’t like that.”
Logan placed his hand over Kieran’s to still them and said softly, “Mo anan cara, I’m a wolf and possessive by nature, but I love you too much to ever cause you distress by making you fearful of what I might do.
” Kissing his mate, Logan continued. “And I do love you, babe, with my whole heart and soul. Don’t be afraid to do what the gods and Fates intended for you to do on earth, because I will be by your side cheering you on as you bring light and beauty to our world. ”
The last of his worries now gone, Kieran grinned at his mate. “Well they also intended for me to reproduce and make more little Kierans so when can we start on that?”
Chuckling, Logan said, “Soon, my love, but first Oracle has to tell me my gift from the Fates, though as far as I’m concerned, I have everything I’ve ever wanted.”
“Me too! Okay, let’s get that over with so you can rim me!”
“You certainly have a one-track mind, don’t you…my sex-crazed, pink-loving twink!” Logan said, tweaking one of Kieran’s nipples.
“Look who’s talking,” replied Kieran as he ground his ass around on Logan’s lap, smiling when he felt how hard his mate’s cock was.
“Oh, so you also learned how to be a cock tease!”
“Uh huh, my Shaman was very thorough!” Kieran said, giggling.
Logan’s fingers slid inside Kieran’s pajama pants and found his cock, eliciting a low moan from Kieran as Logan circled it and started tugging while murmuring what he would do to his mate’s pink pucker with his tongue.
His hole twitching and clenching, Kieran whimpered, imagining all the pleasure Logan’s tongue would give.
Thrusting his hips forward, seeking the friction of his mate’s hand, Kieran cried out in frustration as Logan kept him on the edge.
When his body was awash with desire and consumed with need, Kieran was reduced to begging.
“Oh…please…let me come…now, right now!” Pumping his hips, he felt Logan’s hand tighten… granting his request.