Chapter 29
29
ADRIAN
The warm, late afternoon sun envelops me as I stroll through the lush gardens of the Hamptons beach resort. Golden light glimmers off the ocean in the distance, creating a picturesque backdrop for our engagement party. Everything has to be perfect. My gaze rakes over the placement of tables and chairs, the elegant centerpieces bursting with white roses and calla lilies, checking that all is in order.
Rowena is still getting ready in our room while I handle the last-minute details out here. But even when she isn’t nearby, she consumes my thoughts—the complexity of our connection, the undeniable pull between us, I can’t seem to resist no matter how hard I try. Today, there will be no hiding from her, no escaping away to the office, nothing to keep my mind off her.
Sophie alerts me that the first guests are trickling in, and I station myself near the entrance to welcome them. Rowena should get here any minute, sharing the hosting duties with me. I’m equally impatient and reluctant for that moment to come .
Charles, a colleague from the London office, claps me on the back, startling me from my reverie. I paste on a grin.
“Charles, great to have you here. Grab a drink, the bar’s open.” I gesture toward the white-clothed tables where champagne glasses glitter in the sun.
More guests arrive in a steady stream—coworkers, clients, Rowena’s group of friends. I make the rounds, shaking hands, engaging in small talk, but my eyes keep darting to the resort’s doors. Where is she?
Then Rowena emerges, and the world stops spinning. She’s a vision in a pale pink silk slip dress that clings to her in all the wrong places, the thin straps leaving her shoulders tantalizingly bare. The dress is so simple, so barely there, she’s practically naked. My mouth goes cotton dry. I want to memorize every dip and swell of her body beneath that whisper of silk and at the same time, forget I ever saw her in it.
Keep your distance , I warn myself sternly. But then her eyes meet mine and she smiles, radiant and heart-stopping, and I wonder how I’m supposed to survive the night with her looking like that.
Rowena glides toward me, a sensual smile playing on her lips. As she reaches me, she slips her hand into mine, intertwining our fingers as if it were the most natural gesture in the world. I go rigid instead, struggling to maintain my composure, to remember how to breathe.
“You look beautiful.” I force the words past the tightness in my throat, my voice rough.
“Thank you, Bunny.” She looks at me from under her long lashes, eyes sparkling with an unknown purpose. “You clean up pretty well yourself.”
Before I can reply, Dominic strides in. He greets us with a broad smile and a nod of approval. “Rowena, lovely as ever.” He bows his head at her. “And Adrian, my star. I heard the Johnson deal went through flawlessly.”
I give a confident shrug as if closing the new investors had cost me nothing. No matter that I’ve spent every awake minute of the last two weeks focused on securing the funds, lest my thoughts drift to the forbidden woman currently standing by my side.
But Dominic somehow sees straight through the bravado. He turns to Rowena. “I hope you didn’t feel too abandoned while he was working late.”
“Never. Adrian is always there when I need him.” Rowena half presses herself into me, her hand coming to rest on my chest, a feather-light touch that sears through my linen shirt. My heart pounds beneath her palm. Can she feel it? “I’ve never felt less alone than since we got together. And I’m the same when I have a new project. I lose myself in my work. We understand each other in that way.”
“Great, it’s important to…”
The rest of Dominic’s reply is lost on me because with Rowena pressing herself against my side, half-turned into me, I have a clear view of the rear of her dress—or rather, the lack thereof. The same two thin straps that curl over her shoulders cross once over her otherwise bare back, exposing an expanse of smooth, tempting skin. I exhale shakily, my fingers itching to trace the path of those silken strips of fabric, to unravel them and uncover the hidden treasures beneath.
Dominic clears his throat, a knowing glint in his eye. “Adrian? Did you hear me?”
I want to say yes, but my mind was wholly preoccupied with thoughts of peeling Rowena’s dress off her shoulders, of trailing my lips down her spine, and I’ve no idea what my boss asked.
Heat crawls up my neck. “Sorry, Dominic. What was that?”
He chuckles, shaking his head. “Never mind. We can discuss it later. If I had such a beautiful woman on my arm, I’d be distracted, too.” With a wink, he excuses himself to get a drink.
I keep my arms firmly by my sides, clenching my hands into fists to stop myself from reaching for Rowena. She’s already touching me enough for the both of us, her fingers now casually curling over my biceps. Is she doing it on purpose, or simply playing her part?
After our conversation two weeks ago, I thought we were clear on not confusing things. But I’m not a saint, and my self-control is wearing thin. Why is she torturing me so sweetly?
Whatever she’s doing, it has to stop. I step away from her, putting some much-needed space between myself and her soft curves. The reprieve is short-lived as the photographer we hired for the event appears not a minute later, asking us to pose for a photo.
Rowena closes the gap between us once more, her hand cupping my face as her lips brush against my cheek. My blood simmers at the innocent yet maddening gesture. She’s pushing me to my limits, and I suspect she knows it. That everything she’s doing is deliberate.
Once everyone has arrived, I slip away to get a strong drink, desperate to calm my frayed nerves. But as I down the amber liquid, I still sense the inevitability of her pull. The urge to be close to her.
Even if I had the strength to stay away today, I couldn’t do it because we have to pretend we’re a happy couple. At least, that’s the excuse I give myself as I search for her in the sea of people again.
I find her talking to her friends, their laughter ringing out across the garden. There’s a beautiful woman with them who I don’t recognize. I greet them politely, and introduce myself to the stranger, Dylan’s new girlfriend, it turns out.
Servers in crisp white uniforms bring forward trays of hors d’oeuvres, creating a distraction, and I steal Rowena away.
We move through the crowd together, her arm linked through mine, pulling me closer with every step. Desire battles with the need to maintain boundaries, a war raging inside me. As we chat with colleagues, Rowena’s fingers find my shirt collar, gently straightening it. Each contact is a reminder of the attraction I’m trying to resist.
I’m losing the battle.
Excusing myself once more, I make a beeline for the bar. Another drink. Anything to dull the ache of wanting her. But even as the alcohol burns down my throat, I know it’s futile. Rowena has me wrapped around her finger and all she has to do for me to unravel is pull a little harder.
As if she’s heard me, I feel a prickle on my scalp a second before she sidles up to the bar. Her arm wraps around my lower back, turning my nervous system haywire. “Can you get me a virgin mimosa, Bunny?” she purrs, her breath tickling my neck.
I nod, barely able to focus on what I’m telling the bartender as I order her drink. Moments later, I hand Rowena her cocktail, grab some food, and sit at one of the many whitewashed tables with a few of my traders, hoping for a brief respite.
But my plan backfires when Sarah joins us and, immediately after, Rowena, noting the lack of extra chairs, settles into my lap, draping an arm over my neck as she sips her cocktail. The intimacy of the position drives me wild. I’m unhinged. As I attempt to keep up the conversation, Rowena plays with the hair at my nape, twirling it around her fingers. I close my eyes, briefly savoring the sensation even as I remind myself to stay in control.
The torture never ends. Rowena’s hand trails over my shoulders, tracing patterns on my forearm. Each touch is a sweet agony, eroding my resistance a little further.
As the time for speeches and toasts approaches, I’m relieved I’ll have to stand soon.
But just as I’m about to get to my feet, she tilts my chin up, forcing me to meet her gaze. “You’ve got this, Bunny,” Rowena whispers, finally slinking off me.
With that simple encouragement, she sends me off to face the crowd, my body on fire. I shake my head to disperse the lust mist clouding my brain before I step up to the microphone, my voice steady despite the turmoil burning within me. As I speak, the words I’ve prepared about what a lucky guy I am to have found my missing half flow from my heart. And I’m not even sure where the fiction ends and the truth begins anymore. As I finish my toast, Rowena joins me on stage and, seemingly overwhelmed with emotion, she grabs the microphone and says, “What he just said.”
Our guests laugh and clap. In response, she drops her forehead on my chest, snuggling closer. To everyone watching, it must look like she’s moved by my heartfelt speech.
I’m not sure what she’s up to exactly, but I’m done pretending I don’t crave whatever it is she wants to give me.
“Kiss her already!” someone in the crowd shouts, and my heart nearly stops .
Rowena’s head snaps up. Our eyes lock. For a split second, a flicker of uncertainty dances across her irises, but then she gives me a tiny nod. Permission granted.
I lean down, brushing my lips against hers in a chaste kiss. The brief contact is not nearly enough, but it’s all I can allow myself. But as I make to pull back, Rowena’s arms wind around my neck, refusing to let go. She kisses me again—nothing chaste about it this time.
And that’s when I lose it.
I tighten my grip on her waist, digging my fingers into her hips as I pull her impossibly closer, deepening the kiss. Her hands thread through my hair, tugging more frantically as our mouths grow more urgent, more insistent.
We are lost together, in a moment of absolute, unfiltered passion. Rowena’s lips part beneath mine and I take the invitation, my tongue sweeping into her mouth to taste her fully. She tastes like the pineapple juice of her mimosas, sweet and intoxicating. Our breaths mingle, ragged and hot, as the kiss ignites.
Her body melts against mine. My hands roam her back, skimming the low edge of her silky dress—its plunging line not much higher than her tailbone. Her skin is warm under my fingertips even as she shudders. Rowena moans softly into my mouth, and the sound sends me spiraling. I forget we’re standing in front of an audience full of people, my hunger for her insatiable.
All that exists is the taste of her, the way she fits in my arms. I’m lost, drowning and I never want to come up for air.
Catcalls and whistles finally break through the haze and someone shouts, “Get a room!”
We pull apart, both of us panting and wide-eyed. I stare at Rowena, shocked, marveling at the way she made me unravel—utterly, completely. She looks equally overwhelmed, but there’s also a hint of smugness in her expression. That coyness makes me want to repay the teasing look with another kiss.
Thank fuck the moment is broken by a server announcing dinner is ready. The main meal is served in a different section of the resort, still facing the beach, but with elegantly decorated tables. The menu is a lavish affair, but I can barely taste the food. Rowena sits beside me, every accidental brush of limbs a distraction.
First she leans in, her fingers tracing the tense muscles of my shoulder. “You have a bit of lint,” she breathes against my ear. She plucks at the invisible offender, her touch lingering longer than necessary.
I grind my teeth, trying to concentrate on the surrounding conversation, but it’s impossible. Rowena’s proximity is driving me to the edge, and after that kiss, I’m not sure how much longer I can hang on to the flimsy thread of self-discipline I got back.
All throughout the meal, she finds little ways to torment me. A whisper in my ear, a hand on my thigh under the table. Each touch is innocent enough, but the cumulative effect is maddening.
After dinner, the band strikes up a slow melody and couples drift to the spacious deck lit by string lights to dance. Rowena stands, holding out her hand to me. “Dance with me, Bunny?”
I hesitate, knowing that dancing with her is reckless insanity, but the stage is set. I take her hand and let her lead me onto the floor, my jaw working as she steps into my arms.
Rowena’s hands slide up my chest, settling on my shoulders. She looks at me with those impossibly big eyes, a shy smile on her face. “I don’t really know what to do.”
Instinct takes over. I palm the small of her back, pulling her toward me, the startled gasp that escapes her lips my reward. With my other hand, I trail up her forearm, entwining our fingers. “Let me lead, then.”
My darling fiancée swallows, suddenly not so smug anymore.
I lean forward, letting my voice hover just above a breath against her ear, “Don’t worry, I’ll be gentle.”
She doesn’t respond, but a tremble shakes her body.
Today Rowena started a risky game, and now I’m her willing pawn, captured into this match that can’t have winners.
On my prompt, we sway to the music, our bodies pressed together. With every step, every touch, my resolve to keep away crumbles a little further. Halfway through the second song, I bury my face in her hair, inhaling the scent of her. I shouldn’t let myself get caught up in the moment, but I’m helpless to stop.
When we step apart after a countless number of songs, I’m a mess of tangled emotions. I want her so badly it hurts, but I can’t have her. Not really. Not for long. My job is too demanding to allow space for a healthy relationship. And if Dominic picks me as his replacement, it’ll only get worse. I can’t do this to myself—not again. But especially, I can’t do it to her.
But as Rowena slips her fingers into mine, leading me to the edge of the beach to watch the firework display, those thoughts fade into the distance. Her laughter rings out, clear and infectious, as the night sky explodes into a tapestry of color. Fireworks reflect in her wide eyes, as the guests ooh and ahh at the spectacle.
Rowena sidles in front of me, her bare back pressing against my torso as she shivers. “It’s getting chilly.” She reaches behind to grab my hands and wrap my arms around her waist. “Keep me warm.”
My throat tightens as my body responds to her nearness, her touch, her scent. She fits perfectly against me, like she was made for me. I hold her close, relishing her warmth, even as I tell myself this is wrong—or too right.
The fireworks continue to burst overhead, but I barely notice. My focus on Rowena. The way she leans into me, the soft sigh that escapes her lips, the way her fingers lace with mine. It’s all too much, too overwhelming, too real.
I’m teetering on the edge of a dangerous precipice, and if I’m not careful, I’ll fall. Fall into a hole so deep I’ll never be able to climb out.
The show ends, and, gradually, the guests disperse, heading back to the hotel or off to their own mansions. We linger on the beach; I’m reluctant to move, to break this spell we’re under.
But then Rowena turns in my arms, her gaze on me almost challengingly. “Time for bed?”
I should say no. I should tell her to go ahead, that I’ll join her soon and sleep on the sand instead, where it’s safe. I should give myself a minute to clear my head, remember all the reasons this is a terrible idea. But when Rowena takes my hand, tugging me toward the hotel, I’m powerless to resist.
We reach our room and I close the door behind us. Rowena turns her back to me, reaching up to remove her earrings with a casualness that belies the tension crackling between us.
I watch her, transfixed by the dotted line of her spine. I want to reach out and lower those crossing strips, trace each knot with my fingertips, my lips, my tongue.
Something inside me snaps, the last threads of my control fraying and breaking. I’ve fought this attraction for so long, denied myself what I want. But I won’t fight it anymore. Not after tonight. Not after the way she’s toyed with me, teased me, driven me to the brink of madness.
“You’ve been playing with me all day,” I say, my voice thick with unspoken need.
Rowena meets my gaze in the mirror, her eyes dark and full of promise. And that’s when I know I’m well and truly lost.