Chapter 20 #2
“‘Nothing Else Matters’,” Portia says.
“By Metallica?” I grin. Of course he would pick something like that.
“It’s so pretty at first—” Isabelle starts.
“Father was so angry after his performance—” Portia continues.
“But he was so good.” Isabelle shakes her head.
“I bet he still is—” Portia agrees.
“—but he won’t play anymore. Though maybe for you he would,” Isabelle muses.
“Maybe.” But I don’t know that I’ll ask him to. He’s been punished enough in his lifetime.
We shift our conversation away from Connor to talk about the lessons we took as kids.
Rix enrolled in every free cooking class under the sun, Hemi was a master debater and took scrapbooking, Lexi (no surprise) lived and breathed hockey—just like Callie and Flip, and Hammer loved working on graphics and graphic design.
Tally and Fee both loved dance, but Fee’s passion lies in art.
Portia and Isabelle have a laundry list of things they’ve dabbled in, from golf to dance to piano.
I joined clubs in school, but I didn’t have many foster homes willing to part with the money to put me in lessons.
Everly echoes this, but jumps in to say that she joined the drama club at school this semester and likes to work on the sets.
Some of the parents also provide snacks, like pizza and subs, which she clearly enjoys.
Everly and Cordelia have to leave to retrieve Victor and we send them off with takeout for him and dessert.
Roman picks up Callie at the end of dinner, and any disappointment at being left out of what’s next disappears when he reminds her Connor is meeting them at the local rink to shoot the puck around for an hour.
As soon as she’s gone, Lexi’s eyes light up. She looks to Hemi. “Is it time?”
Hemi nods. “Oh, it’s time.”
Hammer shimmies in her seat, and Tally claps excitedly.
“No shots,” I declare.
“How about fun shots, with fifty percent juice?” Essie suggests.
“No shots,” I repeat.
“You say that now,” Flip says.
“The bachelorette scavenger hunt begins!” Lexi pulls a set of typed cards out of her bag and passes them around the table.
I scan the list. Almost every clue is a literary reference.
“The only person who isn’t allowed to look up these quotes is the bride-to-be.” Lexi winks at me.
Shortly thereafter, we leave the restaurant and head for what we’ve determined is our first stop.
“This was you, wasn’t it?” I prop my fist on my hip and give Rix a knowing look when we arrive. We’re standing outside an adult store that was designed with vaginas in mind.
“What makes you think that?” she asks, eyes wide.
“The clue says, Rix has a full crisper, so she doesn’t need to visit this spot on Wooley Street.”
Hammer elbows Tally in the side, while Hemi covers her mouth with her hand.
Thankfully, Flip is too busy trying to decode the scavenger hunt list to catch this.
Lexi leans in and whispers, “A crisper full of what?”
I pat her shoulder. “Stay in the dark, my friend. It’s safer there.”
We file inside the store. Isabelle and Portia, who I expect to be totally out of their element, shriek excitedly and head for the vibrator wall. They’re like kids in a candy store.
Flip finally looks up from his phone. “Whoa. I’m just going to sit right here.” He points to the chairs outside the change rooms.
“Head down, my friend.”
“Yeah, seems like the safest option.”
Lexi links her arm with mine. “You having fun?”
“I really am. Thank you for doing this.” I never thought I’d get married, let alone have a group of amazing friends willing to go to all this trouble to throw me a bachelorette party.
Tally and Fee have stopped in front of a wall of pleasure devices. Tally’s head is tipped to the side, lips pushed out. “What is that?”
“Ask Lexi. She has one,” Fee says loudly.
I snort a laugh.
Lexi shakes her head. “Fuck my life.”
“Lexi!” Tally grabs the device, which is attached to the wall with one of those cords so people can look at it, but not pocket it. I don’t know why anyone would want a sex toy that’s been handled by hundreds of people, but apparently some people prioritize pleasure over being sanitary.
“I got this.” I pat Lexi’s arm. “It simulates oral sex. You put it on your clit, and it does all the work. That way you don’t have to rub it like you’re trying to make a genie appear.”
Tally nods. “Oh, that’s handy.”
“Very,” Lexi agrees. “Although mine doesn’t get much use these days.”
“I’m going to wait outside.” The door tinkles as Flip disappears through it.
Tally smirks.
Lexi and I exchange a look.
We spend more time than is reasonable in the store, and Portia and Isabelle come out with bags full of goodies.
Flip frowns when he notices Tally also has a bag, but if he has thoughts, he keeps them to himself.
She’s a full-fledged adult. She’s in her third year of university and has been living in an apartment on her own since her first year.
From there, a passage from one of my favorite romance books, takes us to a cupcake shop.
We indulge in dessert and drinks, filling in our scavenger-hunt cards, and then a quote from Shakespeare leads us to a bookstore that serves spiked coffees and teas.
Finally, with a flourish, Lexi hands me the last envelope, and we make it to the final stop, a local pub for trivia night.
And because we haven’t imbibed enough, of course trivia turns into a drinking game.
Every time I get a question right, I have to drink.
This would be fine if I didn’t know the answer to almost all the questions and feel compelled to give the correct one.
But things being what they are, I keep draining glasses.
After a while Lexi accompanies me to the bathroom, because I’m no longer steady on my feet.
I’m a lightweight, and three margaritas—plus whatever else I had earlier that I can no longer remember clearly—are kicking my ass.
“This has been so fun.” I try to move my bachelorette sash out of the way, but it’s impossible.
I hang it over the door. “Are you having fun even though you can’t drink? ”
“I’m having a great time,” she assures me. “Connor’s sisters are really gelling with the Babes.”
“Right? I’m happy about that. Sometimes we just need to step outside our comfort zone.” I do my business and straighten my dress, then retrieve my sash. I can’t figure out how to get it back on. “I think I might be a little drunk.” I open the door and stumble out.
Lexi catches my arm. “You’re usually a one margarita girl.”
“Yeah. Three is a lot for me.” Reality is starting to hit, but it’s softened by the booze. “I can’t believe I’m getting married in a little more than a week.”
She pushes my hair over my shoulders. “You don’t have to go through with it if you don’t want to. Everyone will understand.”
I shake my head. “I don’t want an out. And that’s not just the margaritas talking,” I whisper.
“I think…I like him? We’re so similar. We both have damage from people who were supposed to love us.
” My words are stumbling over each other.
Sometimes I feel like I’m made of Swiss cheese.
I take her hands. “I don’t know if I’ll ever really find the kind of love you have, Lexi.
This might be my only chance, and selfishly, I want it.
I want the fairy tale, even if it isn’t real, even if it comes with a wicked mother-in-law, and even if it means I marry the hockey world’s misunderstood villain. ”
“We’re all someone’s villain,” she replies. “Maybe you get to be his angel.”
“I would like that.”
When we return to the table, Tally is talking about going to a nightclub, but that’s never been my scene.
I can only handle so much before I’m on sensory overload.
There’s too much contact with people I don’t know, too many unknowns.
So when we head out, I thank my friends for a fantastic night and take a car to Grace Manor.
Connor meets me at the front door. He’s dressed in black joggers and a black T-shirt, the art on his arms on display.
I blink at him. “Did you wait up for me?”
“My sisters texted. So did Lexi and Flip.”
“Flip texted you?” I press a hand to his chest and kick my heels off, groaning at the relief.
“To tell me you were coming home, and that there were no shots, but you’re a lightweight.”
I nod vigorously. “I am such a lightweight.”
“Let me carry you to bed, darling.” He dips down and tucks an arm behind my knees and another behind my back, sweeping me off my feet.
I loop my arms around his neck as he steps into the elevator, and press my face into his warm skin and inhale.
“Are you sniffing me?”
“Maybe.” He smells like sandalwood and citrus, with a hint of mint.
A few moments later, he steps off the elevator, but as he approaches my door I murmur, “Your room.”
He halts.
I lift my head and meet his wary gaze. “I want to stay with you tonight.”
His jaw clenches and releases. “I won’t touch you when you’re drunk, Mildred.”
“You’re touching me now.”
“You know what I mean.” His fingers flex.
“I’m not asking for sex. I just want closeness.”
“Why?”
I sigh, suddenly feeling the weight of everything. “Let me pretend this is real. Just for tonight. Please.”
He regards me with impassive eyes before he presses his lips to my temple. “Okay.”
A single lamp illuminates his bed. But it smells like him, feels like him—dark and broody, a mystery I want to solve. He carries me to his bed and carefully sets me on the satin comforter.
His gaze roves over me, nostrils flaring. “Let me get your pajamas.”
“I’ll take the shirt you’re wearing.”
“Mildred.” His eyes darken.
I grin. “Connor.” I pull my dress over my head.
“You’re a Dredful menace.” But he looks up at the ceiling and removes his shirt, tossing it on the bed. “Tell me when you’re decent.”
I unclasp my bra, letting it fall. Then thread my arms through the sleeves and pull the shirt over my head. It’s soft and smells like him. “I’m decent.”
His eyes drop, and he sucks in his bottom lip, exhaling harshly. He reaches behind me and pulls the covers back. “Under you go.”
I slide up the bed, settling against the pillows as he pulls the covers over me, then moves around to the other side and climbs in. It’s a massive king. There are two feet of satin sheets separating us.
But just like I’d hoped, he stretches out his arm, inviting me in. I slide over to nestle into his side. The light clicks off. I throw my leg over his and settle my palm on his stomach.
“Mildred.”
“You’re warm.” It feels safer in the dark with him, where he can’t see all the things I want in my eyes. “Don’t worry. I won’t be more of a menace than you can handle.”
He sighs and moves my hand to his chest, thumb brushing over the bracelets. “Can I take these off for you, darling?”
“Okay.” He can’t see what’s hiding underneath.
He carefully removes them, one by one, setting them on the nightstand.
“Tell me what you want again,” I whisper.
He presses his lips to my forehead, and I sigh.
“That sweet sound.”
I kiss the edge of his jaw. “What else?”
“You here, like you are right now.”
I nuzzle closer, lips on his cheek. “What else?”
“To play board games with you every night when I don’t have an away series.”
“We can do that.” I cup his cheek and turn his head toward me. “Anything else?”
“You’re not going to remember any of this in the morning.”
“I might.”
His eyes search mine in the darkness, glittering and warm, full of emotions I can’t pin down. “What do you want, Mildred?”
I brush my thumb along the contour of his bottom lip. Love is scary, especially the kind where you give your heart and soul to someone. But I can almost believe we’re something more, something special, and I want to hold on to it, even if it’s fleeting. “For you to kiss me good night.”
His breath breaks against my lips.
“Please,” I whisper.
He lightly skims my cheek, thumb resting under my chin.
There’s a soft brush of lips, a gentle press that lingers.
Then parting lips and sweeping tongues, his quiet moan mixing with mine, and his fingers in my hair.
I want to climb into this moment and stay here.
Live inside this kiss—in his gentleness, in the sweet oblivion of darkness where all that exists is desire, and our damage can’t get in the way.
But then it ends. Like everything does.
“Good night, darling.”
“It is now.”