28
EVERLY
CAN YOU ENVISION A LIFE without me? If the answer is yes, I’ll let you go when the time comes. It will break me, but I’ll do it for your happiness.
Since Cash uttered those words a few days ago, they’ve haunted me day and night. From the moment he stepped back into my life, he’s made me his top priority. And how did I repay him when he laid all his cards on the table? By gaping at him like a fish out of water.
Cash is the kind of man every woman wishes she had. He would go to great lengths to protect me, is attentive to my every need, and has a gift for making me feel cherished and adored.
But that doesn’t take away the shadow of doubt that this could all be an illusion. What if he wakes up one day and decides he doesn’t want me anymore? Worst yet, what if I confess my feelings, only to discover later that our goals and aspirations don’t align?
When things fell apart with Landon, I was left shattered and broken; losing Cash would devastate me beyond repair.
He hasn’t brought up our conversation about the future again. I can only assume he’s waiting for me to give him an answer when I’m ready.
What if I never am? Destined to be stuck in a perpetual state of unrest, too afraid to admit my love for the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.
There, I admit it.
I love Cash Stafford.
I’m jolted from my thoughts as we pull up to his parents’ house.
Joining the mile-high club with Cash was hands down the most erotic sexual experience I’ve ever had. There was something exhilarating about being blind-folded and completely at his mercy.
Afterward, we cuddled in bed before returning to the cabin. I spent the rest of the flight working so that I can fully enjoy my weekend with Cash and his family.
Cash hands a hundred-dollar bill to the driver and retrieves our bags from the trunk. We’re halfway up the driveway when the front door swings open.
“Mike, they’ve arrived,” Johanna shouts as she runs across the porch to greet us. “Oh my goodness, I can’t believe you’re here.” She throws her arms around me in a big hug, holding me close. “How are you, sweetie?”
“I’m good,” I say with a smile.
“Is Cash treating you well? I won’t hesitate to set him straight if he isn’t.”
Cash rolls his eyes. “Mom, I’m right here.”
“That doesn’t mean I can’t—” She stops when she notices his short hair. “Oh, Cash, your hair. You look so handsome.” She presses a kiss on his cheek.
“Thanks. Everly cut it,” he says.
“You did a wonderful job,” Johanna tells me, her voice catching.
I keep my eyes on Cash. “Thank you,” I say, and we share a knowing look.
“Do you have to bring your mother to tears whenever you come home?” Mike asks Cash as he steps onto the porch to join us. “She was all smiles this afternoon, anticipating your arrival.”
“These are happy tears,” Johanna assures him. “I’m just so glad to have two of my kids home for the weekend.”
My chest tightens with emotion when she calls me one of her own.
“We’re glad we could come, Mom,” Cash says.
“Why don’t we all go inside and get something to eat,” Johanna suggests. “I put a lasagna in the oven and made homemade garlic bread to go with it. I’m sure you must be starving.”
“Good thinking about skipping the meal on the plane,” I whisper to Cash.
He’d warned me that his mom would have a big spread planned for when we got here.
“Hey, Dad, is it alright if we go to the garage for a few minutes?” Cash asks Mike. “I wanted to check to make sure my Jeep’s still running.”
“Sure thing, son,” Mike says.
“I’ll be right back,” Cash assures me.
Johanna drapes her arm around my shoulder. “She’ll be fine, but don’t take too long.” “We won’t, dear,” Mike promises.
Cash and Mike head toward the garage, disappearing into the side door.
I follow Johanna inside the house, and the scent of sugar, spices, and warm butter welcomes me, making my stomach grumble.
“Good thing I made dinner,” she says as she heads toward the kitchen. “I experimented with a recipe for cinnamon rolls, so you’ll have to try one for dessert.
“Smells delicious,” I say.
Halfway down the hall, I stop when I notice the new family photos hanging up in silver frames. There’s a group shot with the whole family, everyone grinning from ear to ear. I laugh when I come to a photo of Lola running across the lawn with Waffles and the puppies gleefully chasing after her. Next are the couple photos, lined up in a row.
My eyes well up when I reach the last photograph—Cash and I sitting on the blanket, his arms around me and my hand covering his. I’m looking at the camera, and Cash gazes down at me with affection. His expression isn’t manufactured. It’s the real deal. I know because I’ve seen that same look hundreds of times since that day.
“They turned out beautifully, didn’t they?” I spin around to find Johanna approaching, wiping her hands on a kitchen towel. She must have gone into the kitchen while I was distracted by the photos.
“Yeah, the photographer did an exceptional job,” I agree.
“She really did,” Johanna says proudly. “I’ve been wanting new family photos for years. I had hoped to wait until everyone settled down, but we can take new ones once Harrison finds his special someone.” She flips the towel over her shoulder. “He’s spent his adult life carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders, and I think he’s forgotten what it’s like to be happy.”
“I’m sure he’ll find his perfect match when the time is right,” I say with a reassuring smile.
“Oh, I have no doubt, but I prefer not to leave things to chance.” She steps closer to the wall of pictures. “This one is my favorite.” She nods toward the photo of me and Cash.
“Yeah, mine too.”
“It’s the first picture where he’s willingly showing his scar. Since the accident, his confidence hasn’t been the same. He puts on a good front, but I’m his mother—I can tell when my kids are struggling.” She rests her hand on her chest. “I couldn’t believe it when the photographer sent me the photos, and I saw this one. My son proudly showing his scar, unconcerned about who might see it. It’s all thanks to you, dear.” She gently squeezes my arm.
“Me?”
She nods, wiping away a tear. “Being with you has helped him find the confidence he lost and to learn to be comfortable in his own skin again. I can’t count how many times I’ve tried to get him to do more than trim his hair, and then you come along, and he does it willingly. To me, that’s a miracle.”
Another tear falls down her cheek. “You and Theo have been part of our family since you were kids, and it warms my heart that you and Cash found happiness in each other.” Her voice breaks a bit, and she swipes her hands across her cheeks, drying them. “Oh goodness, even menopause can’t keep my hormones in check.” She laughs.
A lump forms in my throat, and if I’m not careful, I’ll start crying, too. I used to dream about being part of the Stafford family, and hearing Johanna reaffirm that I am, means more than she’ll ever know.
“I’m going to check on the lasagna,” she says, as if she senses I need a moment to regain my composure. “As soon as Cash and his father come inside, we’ll eat.”
“I’ll come help you in just a minute,” I promise.
“Take your time, sweetie.” She gives my arm another gentle squeeze before going to the kitchen.
I return my attention to the photo of Cash and me, tilting my head as I study it. This time, I focus on my features.
The day the picture was taken, I recall feeling nervous and disoriented. We’d only been married for less than twenty-four hours, and I had just found out about the acquisition.
Despite that, when I look at the image, my smile is genuine, and I’m holding Cash’s hand like I never want him to let me go. Even when my whole world was turned upside down, my subconscious knew that I was safe in his arms, and no matter what, he would have my best interest at heart. My feelings for Cash have only grown stronger since that day, and I’m certain he would do anything for me, just as I would for him.
After dinner last night, Cash and I went straight to bed. This morning, we slept in and helped his parents with yard work. It’s been nice to put my job on the back burner for once and focus on spending time with people that I care about.
Dylan, Marlow, and Lola got here a half hour ago to have lunch with us, and Cash went downstairs a few minutes ago after he made me come twice in the shower.
I step into the farmhouse-style open-concept kitchen featuring exposed ceiling beams, butcher-block countertops, and sage-green cabinets. On the opposite side of the room, a massive wooden dining table, with seating for ten, is also there. This was my inspiration for my dream kitchen, which I’ll probably never see come to life, but it's always been the Staffords’ generosity and kindness that’s made the place feel so welcoming.
I hear giggling in the corner and look across the room to find Cash and Lola at a craft table near the bay windows overlooking the backyard. As I step closer, I see they’re coloring pictures of rainbows. Lola’s tongue is poking out in concentration as she tries to stay within the lines.
Cash is next to her, hunched over in a chair that is far too small. His hair falls to his ear, showing most of his scar, and it makes me smile to see how at ease he is.
He’s an incredible uncle to Lola, and I can’t help but envision him as a dad someday, holding a tiny bundle in his arms.
The idea of starting a family has never been a priority. Landon didn’t want kids, and my career demands most of my attention, so I rarely think about it. Now, the image of a mini-Cash rushing into my arms and calling me “mama” is making me reconsider.
“Guess what, Uncle Cash?” Lola chirps.
“What’s up, ladybug?” Cash pauses his drawing to give her his undivided attention.
She points out the window to the backyard where the dogs are chasing each other. “The puppies have names now.”
“Oh yeah. What are they?”
“Muffin, Jellybean, and Cheez-It. I picked them out myself.” She beams with pride.
Cash grins. “Those are some rad names, kiddo.”
“I wanted to name one of them Unicorn, but Daddy said no,” Lola pouts. She goes back to drawing briefly before scrunching up her nose. “Uncle Cash?”
“Yeah, ladybug?”
“What does rad mean?” she asks as Marlow returns from out back, where she and Dylan have been assisting Cash’s parents with the BBQ.
“It means something is cool.” Cash points at her picture. “Like your drawing.”
“Oh.” Lola’s eyes light up with recognition. “I think you’re rad, Uncle Cash.”
“Back at ya, ladybug.”
Marlow steps next to me, carrying a plate of grilled cheeseburgers covered in tinfoil. “That’s going to be her new favorite word for the next month,” she says. “Lola adores Cash.”
“I can see that.” Lola is now sitting in Cash’s lap while he traces her hand on paper.
“How are you?” Marlow asks, transferring the plate to the oven to keep the cheeseburgers warm. “I hope you don’t mind, but Dylan told me about you and Cash. Don’t worry, he swore me to secrecy,” she whispers. “I want you to know I gave him a piece of my mind for suggesting you stay married because of the acquisition. He and Harrison should never have put you in that position.”
It means a lot that she’s looking out for me, even though she’s only met me once before today. Her genuine kindness and thoughtful nature put me at ease, and I could see us becoming good friends.
“I appreciate it, but there’s no reason you should be upset with Dylan. He and Harrison made it clear they’d support us no matter what we decided.” I grab a carton of strawberries from the fridge and empty them into the colander Johanna left on the counter. “My dad is the one who threatened to fire me if we got the marriage annulled.”
“I’m sorry you’re dealing with that.” Marlow frowns. “I can relate to having difficult parents. I’m an only child, and having no contact with them has been hard, but in my case, it’s for the best. The Staffords welcoming me with open arms has been such a blessing.”
“Yeah, they’ve always been like this.” I grab a knife and a cutting board from the drawer. “My brother, Theo, and I spent a lot of time here growing up, and it always felt like a second home.”
It still does.
“I know what you mean. Johanna and Mike made me feel like family right from the start,” Marlow says as I slice strawberries. She leans against the counter and says in a hushed tone, “It’s none of my business, but I just want to say it’s okay to be confused about your relationship with Cash.”
Looking over, I find Cash and Lola still chattering away as they color, paying no attention to me and Marlow. “Were you? Confused, I mean?”
She lets out a humorless laugh. “Was I ever. I never stayed in one place for long until I moved to Aspen Grove, so it was a big adjustment. And I didn’t know how my life would fit with Dylan and Lola’s. It was just the two of them since Lola was a baby, and it took a while to find my place, but it was well worth it.” A warm smile tugs at her mouth. “I’m in the process of adopting her and I can’t wait for us to legally be a family.”
“Did you know you wanted kids before Lola?”
Marlow shakes her head. “Before Dylan, it hadn’t crossed my mind, but now that we’re together, I love the idea of expanding our family. Although, that will have to wait a while until we get the puppies trained.” She chuckles. “I hope I’m not overstepping by saying this, but watching Cash with Lola makes me think that he’d make a great dad someday. Don’t you think?”
It’s like she read my earlier thoughts.
I glance over at the pair again to see that they’ve moved on to finger painting. He holds his hand out while Lola applies a coat of pink paint to his palm, her eyebrows drawn together with intense focus.
Cash’s easygoing nature makes him patient, and he seldom gets frustrated—ideal traits to have as a dad. Sensing my gaze, he looks up and winks, causing my cheeks to flush. His easy charm is infectious, and I smile back before returning my attention to Marlow.
“Yeah, Cash would make a wonderful father,” I agree.
“Change can be scary, but it’s much more manageable when you have the right person by your side to help guide you through unfamiliar territory,” she says.
Marlow’s right.
I think back to the last couple of months. Cash made moving in with him less daunting by getting me a coffee maker for my daily caffeine fix, having dinner on the table every night, and making sure I had access to the stairwell so I didn’t have to ride the elevator. And those were only the things he did when I first arrived.
“Thanks for the advice, Marlow. I appreciate it,” I say as I wipe my hands.
She smiles. “That’s what family is for.”
If she can take a leap of faith, especially with someone who has a child, why am I hesitating to take the next step with Cash?
Communication has a pivotal role in our pending relationship, and I realize the only way we can move forward is if we make sure our visions for the future align. Which means I have to ask Cash some important questions, starting with if he wants kids.