Chapter 23
TALLY
Iam on cloud nine, but also my entire body is pinging with pent-up sexual energy. Everything Flip does and says sends me into a hormonal tailspin. Even just the simple act of holding my hand makes me all melty inside as we watch sea creatures darting through the coral reef.
A sea otter corkscrews in front of us. “That one’s flirting with you,” Flip observes as it does figure eights against the glass.
“Maybe they’re flirting with you.” I snuggle into his side as the otter does a full-body wave.
He gazes down at me, eyes heating. “Would you dance for me?”
“Like that?” I nod to the otter.
“However you want, as long as it’s just for me.”
“I would love to,” I whisper.
Before he can reply, a woman calls his name.
Anxiety makes my chest tight as Flip drops my hand and turns toward the voice. Please don’t be another former hookup. A woman who looks closer to his age than mine approaches. And she’s beautiful.
“It’s so great to see you!” She hugs him and I immediately want to throw down.
Thankfully she releases him quickly. “What are you doing here of all places? Is there some kind of charity event I don’t know about?”
“I’m on a date.” Flip steps to the side and slips his arm around my waist, which is when I realize his previous maneuver was meant to be protective. “Tally, this is Laura. I coach her younger brother, Auggie.”
“It’s so nice to meet you.” I no longer want to catfight her. Mostly. I smile and place a possessive hand on his chest.
“Oh! Hi.” Her gaze darts between me and Flip. “I’m so sorry to interrupt. Your dress is beautiful.”
“Isn’t she stunning?” Flip kisses my temple, which I appreciate.
Auggie appears, wiping his hands on his pants. “I’m back! Coach Madden! What are you doing at the aquarium?”
“Checking out the fish, just like you,” Flip says.
“I love the sharks the most! Are you still going to be my coach next summer?”
“I sure am. Are you going to be the MVP again?”
“I’m going to try!” Auggie animatedly tells Flip about the last goal he scored for his school team.
“I’m so sorry we intruded on your date,” Laura whispers to me.
“Not at all. I love how involved Flip is in the community.”
“He’s such a great coach,” Laura agrees. “He’s so patient with the kids.”
“He has an incredibly kind heart,” I agree.
An announcement comes over the PA that the shark movie starts in ten minutes.
“Oh! We have to go! I want good seats,” Auggie says. “See you in the summer, Coach Madden.”
“See you in the summer!” Laura waves as Auggie pulls her toward the theater.
“Auggie seems sweet,” I note.
“He’s a lot of fun. I’ve been his coach for the past three summers.”
“Laura seems like a fan,” I observe.
“Of hockey?”
I can’t tell if he’s being intentionally oblivious. “And you.”
He kisses my cheek. “Well, I’m a fan of you.” He thumbs over his shoulder at the otter still showing off behind us. “And so is that guy.”
I laugh.
“Hungry?”
“Famished, actually.”
“Me too, but that shouldn’t be a surprise.”
Flip leads me to the private restaurant inside the aquarium, which has a 360-degree view of the sharks swimming around us. It feels like we’re the ones inside the tank.
“This is amazing,” I tell him once we’re seated.
“I’m glad you like it.” Flip squeezes my hand. “I wanted this to be a date to remember.”
“It was already going to be memorable because it’s with you,” I admit.
“I feel the exact same way.” His smile is soft.
The server stops by, and we order drinks and the cauliflower wings to start. The menu is plant-based, and everything sounds delicious.
“Thank you for being accommodating with Auggie and his sister,” Flip says once it’s just us again.
“You really love coaching those kids, don’t you?” He refuses to allow Hemi to use his volunteer coaching as a promo opportunity. Tristan and Brody do it, too.
“I do.” He drags his fingers along mine, thoughtful for a moment. “They’re just…honest and joyful. They’re not caught up in the social media storm, or gossip, or who’s the best. It’s about having fun, and sometimes I need the reminder there’s more to this job than winning.”
“Is this something you can see yourself doing professionally later? Coaching?” My stomach twists. I know what that life looks like when it’s all-consuming.
“For the pros?” Flip strokes the center of my palm.
“It depends on what else is happening in my life. I like playing in Toronto because it keeps me close to my sister and my parents. Ideally, I’d like to finish my career here, but anything can happen.
” As if sensing my unease, Flip curls his hand around mine.
“My future after hockey will be made with the people who are closest to me in mind.”
I force a smile and take a breath. We’re on our first date.
Stressing about what things might look like a few months from now, let alone several years, doesn’t make sense.
“I just see the way things didn’t work out with my parents, and I want to be able to honor what my partner needs, and for my partner to be able to do the same.
My mom set aside her needs to make room for my dad’s and it didn’t work out for them. ”
“I think that makes a lot of sense, especially with how fresh this all is for you. I’ve made bad relationship decisions, and I want to avoid repeating those when it comes to you. Which is why I want to do this right and take it slow.”
My heart skips a couple of beats. “That makes me feel important.”
“You are important, Tally. I care about you.”
“I care about you, too.” My feelings for Flip already feel bigger than I know what to do with.
Our drinks and appetizers arrive, breaking the sudden tension. We order our mains and dig into the appetizer. “You’re not going to try to feed me this time?”
“It feels like we’re being watched,” Flip whispers as a shark swims by.
I laugh and relax a little.
“When is your next showcase? When do I get to see you on stage again?”
“We don’t have a major performance until the end of the term, but we’ll have class performances mid-semester and a few smaller individual pieces leading up to our final showcase. All our routines are set, but it’s been a struggle to book enough practice time lately.”
“Is your schedule too heavy?” he asks.
“No. Our usual studio is being renovated after a flood.”
“That’s not great. How long will that take?”
“Hard to say.” I shrug. “They’ve been slow with updates.”
“There’s a yoga studio in my building. I can check availability for you,” Flip offers.
“I appreciate that, and if we can’t find another solution, I’ll let you know, but it’s a lot of extra commuting, and they also both have part-time jobs, so we’re trying to find something close to campus.”
“That’s a lot of added pressure with everything else you have going on,” Flip notes with concern. “It can’t be easy. Courses, dance practice, family stuff.”
“We don’t have to talk about heavy stuff.”
“I want this with you, Tally. I want you to feel safe with me, to confide in me.”
“I used to think I wanted a relationship like my parents’,” I admit. “I always thought they were happy, now I know they weren’t, and everything is reframed.”
I see all these great relationships around me with my Terror friends, and with Cammie and Chase, and I want to believe they’ll all endure, but who knows what’s happening behind closed doors? What if they all fall apart, too? It’s terrifying.
“I had my faith shaken like that,” Flip says softly.
“With your ex from high school?”
He nods.
“What happened?”
“I loved her and I thought she loved me too.” His eyes lift. “But she wanted me for all the wrong reasons.”
My heart aches for him. “Because of your career?”
“Basically, yeah.” He smiles sadly.
“People always want a piece of you, don’t they?”
“Some people,” he agrees. “And for a long time I let them take pieces they didn’t deserve.”
“But not anymore?” He’s giving me a piece of himself, and I want to protect it, tuck it into my heart, and keep it there forever.
“Not anymore. Now I only want to give pieces of myself to people who will take care of them,” he confides. “I used to associate romantic love with pain. I didn’t trust my own judgment. So for a long while, I was exclusively pleasure-focused.” His gaze lifts. “If it felt good, I did it.”
I wait for the jealousy to come, but it never does. None of those women were taken on thoughtful dates. He didn’t pick them up and bring them flowers. It was about sex and nothing else. “But that’s not what you want now?”
“I want this.” He brings my hand to his lips again. “I want intimacy with you, Tally. I forgot how good it could feel to share this part of myself with someone.”
I can barely breathe. He’s so earnest, so honest. “I want to guard all your secrets, Phillip. I want to be safe for you, too.”
He cups my chin in his palm and leans across the table, brushing his lips over mine. “You’re my dream girl, Tally.” He leans back. “Every step we take forward needs to mean something.”
“You want me to feel special.”
“Exactly. You’re a gift. So when I break my two years of celibacy, it will be because I want this experience with you, and you want the same thing for the same reasons.” He kisses the inside of my wrist. “But we can have a whole lot of fun learning what makes each other tick while we get there.”
Warmth settles low in my stomach. What will it be like when we make it past first base? Will he be soft and sweet? Will we both be so pent-up that we’ll come together like a lightning strike?
He bites my knuckle, and I exhale on a needy whimper.
“Are you thinking about all the things that haven’t happened yet, kitten?”
“It’s hard not to when your mouth is on my skin.”
“Tell me what gets you hot.”
“You.”
He grins. “Have you ever had an orgasm in a public place?”
“Yes.”
Surprise flashes across his face and his eyes darken.
“Does that shock you?”
“Pleasantly, yes.” He leans in closer, dropping his voice to a whisper. “When and where?”