Chapter 19
KANE
Three loud knocks hit the door as Lennox’s voice booms through. “Kane?”
I sit up, wiping the sleep from my eyes and instinctively hold my arm in front of Delilah as she does the same with the sheet at her chest. There’s no light in the room other than the small slivers filtering through the sides of the drapes drawn across the window.
I open the door, expecting him to walk away but he walks into the room, flicking on the lights, uncaring we’ve been in the dark and how it will hurt our eyes as he lowly warns, “Little shadow, don’t cause problems.”
There’s no one else in the hallway as he closes the door behind him before he takes his phone from his pocket. I can’t see through the privacy screen to work out what he’s doing until he tilts it, showing backdoor code in some security software.
There’s no lust or disrespect as he nods his head at Delilah and says, “Mrs. Xandros, I’ve heard a lot about you.”
She glares at him as she hugs the sheet tighter. “I can say the same.”
“I gather it wasn’t positive from your expression.” He acts like this is a normal fucking family moment. “I thought we were close, little shadow.”
“No,” Delilah spits as she sits up on her knees, ripping the thin curtain away from the foot of the bed. “It’s because of what you are. Sick fucking cunt.”
Lennox has strange rules around etiquette, so I try to warn her. “Delilah.”
My uncle raises his hand, stopping me while staring at my wife. “Allow her to speak as freely as her bravery will allow.”
“I’m not afraid of you,” she scoffs while I gauge the quickest route to grab the knife on the window ledge if he goes for her. “What are you going to do? Tie me up again?”
“That isn’t my role.” Lennox softens, lowering his voice. “I would apologize for what you had to endure at their hands, but it’s not mine to give.”
“You’re Lennox?”
“Yes.” He steps forward. I follow as he remains focused on my wife.
“You, more than most, know what Rowan is capable of, little doe. Remember, fear doesn’t have to be a bad thing.
” I think she’s safe because he speaks to her in the same tone he does with me as he lowers to his haunches.
“Fear is a natural instinct, a warning your body provides because it wants to stay alive. It can also be a barrier between you and something far worse.”
“Have you been here the whole time?” I ask, sitting on the edge of the bed.
“I’m here to collect you,” he says simply, resting his arms on his knees to push his gloves flush between his fingers.
“You’re not taking Kane without me.” Delilah grabs my arm, but Lennox looks at her with a small smile playing on his lips. It’s almost pride but he never shows a lot of emotion, so it could be trapped wind for all I know.
“I’ll leave you to talk.” He straightens up to his full height then walks out of the room, his steps stopping close to the door. I tell myself it’s because he’s not like the others as I cup Delilah’s face in both my hands, lightly pressing my lips to her forehead.
“It’s your plan, remember? I’ll come back, but they need to think I’m like them.”
“You’re not leaving me here on my own.” Her nails dig into my skin. “You’re supposed to help me.” There’s so much fear in her eyes, more fear than I ever instilled in her.
“I am helping you, koukla mou.”
“No.”
“Yes. Now, shut the fuck up and wait for me to lock my cunt up so no one touches what’s mine.”
I push her off me and go to the window to take the chastity belt and key. The knife is still there so I tuck it into the back of my boxers. The metal of the belt is cold as fuck from being exposed to the air for so long.
“Do not fucking argue with me, Delilah. Or I’ll tie you to the bed.”
Hurt flashes across her face but she remains kneeling on the bed as I go into the bathroom. Running the hot water, I hold the belt under the stream as it slowly heats. Once the scalding water has heated the metal, I wipe the moisture off it, then test it won’t burn her on the inside of my bicep.
She doesn’t physically fight me as I go back to her. I push against her chest, laying her on back before I pick up her foot and kiss her ankle. “Good girl. I’ll kill anyone who touches this. Including you. Don’t even try to take it off.”
“What if…” She looks to the side as her cheeks turn ruddy.
I carefully place her feet through the designated holes then pull the metal belt up her legs as I stand. “What if?”
“How do I go to the toilet?”
“Don’t worry.” I laugh as I lean over her, cupping her cheek. “I’m sure your shit smells like roses.”
“I’m being serious.” She knocks her knee into my side. “I could get sick. How long will you be gone for?”
I shrug, trying to distract her by literally talking about shit. “Go in the shower after you pee or anything, it’ll wash anything away. There’s gaps in the metal for it to be functional.”
“You’ll come back?”
“Always.”
“You won’t leave me here?”
“Never.” I kiss the tip of her nose, then each of her cheeks, her forehead, ending on her lips.
It seems to settle her enough so she doesn’t argue as I lock the belt in place on her waist and lift off her.
Taking the shoelace from one of my boots, I thread the key through it then tie it around my neck with four knots.
The fibers screech as I pull each side to make sure it’s tight and walk to the window to collect my lighter.
Delilah watches me bring the flame to the tied end of the lace while I find comfort in the heat as I hold the knot to the flame.
Once the plastic in the fibers have melted together, I roll the lace between my thumb and forefinger so no one can remove it.
My t-shirt is still on the ledge, but I leave it so she has something to wear now it’s dry.
My pants are in the bathroom, so I grab them.
I have one leg inside when Lennox walks back into the room with a duffel bag.
He gently sits at the end of the bed while Delilah covers her entire body from the neck down.
Gesturing to the bag he says, “You can change when we leave.”
“Like that creepy bitch will let me,” she mumbles back.
“Do you know I was raised in this house?” he asks.
“How unfortunate for you.”
I want them to get along because, in his own way, Lennox has tried to be there for me. He’s the only person who would visit me. Even now, he’s trying to help me as he unzips the bag and hands me a hoodie when I leave the bathroom.
“Every family has their secrets, little doe,” he says to Delilah. “If you find the walls whispering ours once you’re alone, take heed of their warnings.”
She warms slightly even though she hisses, “Everyone in this fucking family is creepy.” But she holds her hand out for the bag, and he passes her it with a small smile on his face. “Will you keep him safe?”
“With my life.” He nods.
Once I’m dressed, he gestures to the door and looks down at my one unlaced boot.
He stops me from walking ahead as he removes the string from my hoodie before lowering to his haunches and threading the string through the eyelets in my boot.
I don’t know what prompts my question, but I still ask, “Do you have kids?”
He loops the strings, tying them together as he softly whispers, “Reflections don’t have children.”
I follow him when he’s done, half intrigued, half saddened for him. I remember the loneliness of living in Asher’s shadow. That was in the “normal” world, not this fucked up one.
Lennox’s entire demeanor changes as we go downstairs into the lounge where Helene is sitting with Delilah’s grandparents. He’s even less emotional than usual, robotic as he says, “Mother, we are leaving.”
She sets her gold-rimmed teacup on the saucer then on a coaster on the coffee table before she walks over to us. Ignoring her son, she stops in front of me, assessing me from head to toe. “Enjoy what will become yours one day.”
There’s not even a glance in Lennox’s direction as she turns to go back to her guests. He doesn’t expect it either because he’s already walking away and waits beside the front door for me. Psychologists would quit the field if they studied this family.
I wait until we’re in his car to interrogate him. “How come she doesn’t talk to you?”
“I’m a reflection.” He drives down the steep hill leading away from the house.
“So she’s never spoken to you?”
He’s lying to me because he adjusts the collar of his shirt as we approach the gates—which open automatically—unlike my uncle who’s closed off.
“What could you have done to piss her off? She keeps dead bodies lying around her house, for fuck’s sake.”
There’s a small chuckle. An actual fucking chuckle as he drives through the dark, unlit roads without turning his high beam on.
“You met my father?” There’s more softness in his features than when he speaks about his mother. “He would play with us before the waves took away the garden.”
“Why doesn’t Helene talk to you?”
“I angered her.”
I swear to fuck he’s annoying. I push back in my seat, exasperated with his shit. “Lennox, can you for once just tell me something without me trying to work out the correct combination of words to get an answer?”
He slows down significantly as he takes a random turn through a row of empty houses until we’re on another empty road like time has stood still as he turns on the high beam.
Old shop fronts with dusty windows, a discarded bike on a patch of weeds.
All the brambles have grown over it, like they’re eating it and pulling it into the earth.
We keep crawling forward until we reach what I assume was a home.
All the windows have been blown out, scorch marks on the brick, but my uncle stares at it with longing as he softly says, “It’s very rare a man is born wanting to be what he becomes.
Human nature makes us want. Things, people, everything which doesn’t belong to us. ”
I look at him.
“The island used to be inhabited. Everyone living here co-existed. They accepted the things our family did. In turn, they were provided everything they could possibly want. After all, any man would trade one child to save his others.”
“What happened?”
“Melantha, Helene’s mother, had a maid she was fond of.
She’s of the world before Helene, where the Kobalts were respectable, hiding their secrets amongst the shadows.
” He spares me a glance. “The manor—where we were—used to have a small floodlight on the roof like a small lighthouse, so previous generations would guide the shipments in the shadows while everyone was distracted by their necessities arriving. There was a maid who was privy to the family secrets who didn’t particularly take a liking to Helene.
Sarah, the maid, began to deteriorate in her old age, telling Helene’s secrets. ”
Does he know one of those secrets is the fact I’m not my parents’ child?
“When Helene found out, she decreed everything should be stripped from Sarah,” Lennox says, his voice weighing down along with his features as he tightens his hold on the steering wheel. “Her dignity, her wealth, her comfort—and her daughter.”
“How old was her daughter?”
“Ten.” He pales, staring at me like he’s trying to give me another warning. “She was small due to being sick as a baby, so she looked no older than six or seven. She was a sweet girl, always humming wherever she went. Especially when she was afraid and she would hold her dolly tighter.”
“Did you…”
“I angered her,” he repeats, shaking his head.
“Rowan was supposed to remain hidden at her side while she taught him everything he needed to know for the businesses to run. He was eager to prove he could do what she wanted. He didn’t want me to be punished for disobeying our mother, so one night, after I’d already ruined Sarah, we switched places—I hid while he left the manor. ”
There’s a very loud siren telling me this story doesn’t end well. Yet Lennox decides now is the time to be honest.
“He’s always been curious, even now. That was his first taste of the outside world without our mother’s hand in his. He satiated his curiosity about an animal mounting a human.”
I’m going to throw up.
“Eight dogs, three days in the forest, and he returned to the manor without a speck of dirt on him. So you see now, there are tiers to evil. Some of us accept our stations because we aim to lessen the cruelty rather than prolong it. If I had done what Helene had asked, I would have killed Sarah’s daughter quickly, efficiently.
But I didn’t, so the innocent girl no longer hums.”
“How old were you?”
“Old enough to know what would happen, old enough to accept my punishment.” He begins driving again. Then turns to me with half of his face covered in shadows, the other illuminated by the lights from the dash.
“She was pissed at you because her golden boy left the house?” I ask.
“The other people on the island began hearing phantoms of her humming when they crossed the forest. When her body was found, they saw she was torn between her legs, brutalized and left for dead. The islanders called to the wards for help. They argued it was against nature because they couldn’t ignore what had been done any longer.
So, as you put it, she was pissed the world she had carefully crafted began to crack. ”
I feel sorry for him and I don’t know how to convey his life is seventy shades of fucked when he seems to accept it. He looks at me like he knows it already as he softly says, “A church without worshippers is just a building. This island without inhabitants made Helene a woman, not a god.”