Chapter 2 #3
Suddenly there was another doubt creeping in. Rhys was a high earner, and while she didn’t do too badly, in a marriage, a partnership, surely it made sense to move or follow the person bringing in the bulk of the household income?
Back at Rhys’s flat, a short walk from Keira’s but a long enough stroll for Sarah to come to a decision, she called her boss.
Her boss was great, and after Sarah explained that before she got married she wanted to see her elderly grandparents, who weren’t in great health, they agreed she could take unpaid leave when their current job ended.
All Sarah wanted was time to get her head straight. She couldn’t think properly here at the flat with Rhys, or when she was around her mum, and she had to consider what was the biggest decision of her life. She had to know what she really wanted. She’d thought she already knew, but did she really?
The next call she made was to her mum. And she told her she wouldn’t be home for Christmas.
‘I’m not going to Rhys’s either.’ Sarah added that in before her mum thought she’d chosen between them. ‘I’m going to Switzerland.’
There was a long silence before Chrissie spoke. ‘But the wedding…’
‘I’ve got time; it’s only November.’
‘But your final dress fitting.’
‘The dress was pretty much perfect. I’m nipping back one more time to be sure and then I’ll collect it a few days before.
The lady at the shop said I can put it on one more time just in case, but unless I have a major weight issue then it should be fine.
’ Her weight had been stable this whole time since she’d chosen the dress, so she’d just have to be careful.
‘Sarah—’
‘Mum, I’ve made up my mind.’ Her heart beat wildly as she delivered her firm decision.
There was a pause before her mum asked, ‘Is this because of me?’
Sarah’s bottom lip trembled. She loved her mum, she wanted her mum, but she wasn’t helping right now.
‘It’s because of me,’ Sarah answered. ‘Grumps and Nanna won’t be at my wedding, and I feel like I really need to see them before I get married.’
The second she got off the phone she wrote a letter to her grandparents.
It was easier to do that than make a call; she didn’t trust herself not to sound upset.
She’d call them in a few days when she knew they had the letter, and in the meantime, she’d get the travel arrangements underway and finish up at work.
Boarding for her flight was called, shaking her out of the memories that had led up to this moment.
Sarah walked across the jet bridge and showed the flight attendant her boarding pass.
It was stop-start all the way up the aisle, as passengers tried to shove stupidly big bags in the overhead bins, then took coats off, then realised they’d left something in the stupidly big bag so yanked it down again before noticing they were holding up everyone behind them.
Finally, she took her seat and smiled at the female passenger who shuffled into the middle seat and greeted her.
She looked a lot like Rhys’s mum, who was lovely.
In fact, the whole family was. It was just that there were a lot of them.
And already the wedding sounded like it was going to be huge.
Rhys’s family and friends had brought the guest list for the wedding to two hundred so far.
Two hundred! And the guests didn’t even include the two men she adored – her dad and Grumps – which all but broke her heart.
Until recently Sarah had had no idea that anything with Rhys would ever be complicated. How could it be when they were head over heels for each other?
She still wanted Rhys, she was in love with him, but with Rhys came a life she wasn’t sure she was ready for.
Would she feel like she was missing out on something if she got married so young?
And if she loved him enough to marry him, why hadn’t she run to him?
Why hadn’t she talked to him and explained that she wasn’t sure she was ready for all of this?
She rested her head back against the headrest as the plane gathered speed. Droplets of rain failed in their traction against the window glass; grey skies lingered.
She’d lied to her fiancé about her reasons for going to Switzerland.
And she hated lying to him. This was the first time she ever had.
She’d told Rhys that with her nanna’s heart problems, and the fact her beloved grandparents wouldn’t be at their wedding, she just had to see them before they got married.
She’d also fibbed that Grumps had a neighbour who had a decorating job for her so it would be worth her while as she was taking unpaid leave.
He’d been disappointed by her absence at Christmas but as they would have many more as a couple, he said he understood and they’d had breakfast together before she’d left for the airport.
She knew she was being a coward.
At least her mum would be working most of the days over Christmas. It would stop her calling all the time, deciding that her own doubts and her daughter fleeing to Switzerland were more problems she had to solve.
For once, Sarah really wanted to fix this one for herself.