Chapter Thirty-Four
Hazel
“Mmmm.” Reid’s chest vibrated against my back, his fingers twitching and his hips flexing forward as he drifted out of the relaxed and exhausted sleep we’d fallen into last night. After our impromptu couch humping, he’d carried me to bed and wrapped himself around me, stroking my hair until I fell asleep. “Want to wake up like this every day.”
I wholeheartedly agreed that waking up in his arms was nice. Okay, it was more than nice. When my eyes had fluttered open, I noticed dawn breaking through the gap in his curtains, and I’d freaked out that last night had actually happened.
Not only was my virginity problem not resolved despite the intense orgasm last night, but Reid had been the guy I’d been falling for in real life and in the texts we’d been exchanging. Residual anger still lingered at the edges of my mind, but I’d stood up for myself last night in a way I never had before, and he’d seemed genuinely contrite about his part in the deception.
Hating and avoiding him for the next two years wouldn’t help either of us, especially if I’d had to watch him decide to try out a relationship with someone else. The thought of losing what had been building between us was more painful than what had happened.
In a twisted sort of way, I was flattered that Reid had stacked the deck to charm me into falling for him. And I trusted he didn’t really have nefarious plans to love me and leave me, because he easily could’ve seduced me into his bed long before now .
Hell, he could’ve just let Seven drift off into a mystery, never revealing what he did. Then I would never have confessed how my feelings for him had changed. That would’ve been much more deceptive than coming clean, even if it hurt.
But the question that had been plaguing me was, how long had these feelings for me been building? Until a few months ago, my existence had seemed like something that lingered in the periphery of his life. I was just his best friend’s little sister who once had considered him a friend—despite the clandestine nature of our late-night drawing sessions.
Back then, the nearly six-year age gap had been a big deal. I was a lovesick teen, and he was an adult, but he’d never said or done anything that could’ve been misconstrued as inappropriate. And despite the way I’d avoided him for the last few years, he’d done nothing to push me or make me intentionally uncomfortable.
“Did you sleep okay?” he asked, squeezing me tighter as his hand slowly crept down my belly and played with the waistband of my lace panties.
“Yeah.”
“Are you hungry? Do you want me to make you some breakfast? I’m not sure what food I have in my refrigerator, but I’m resourceful.”
“Maybe later,” I whispered, and his hand froze. He scooted away slightly and rolled me to my back, leaning over me to look into my eyes.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” But I could tell by the flash of disappointment in his eyes that he realized I wasn’t being truthful with him.
“Haz. I know when you’re overthinking something and freaking yourself out. I can tell by the tone of your voice. Just tell me. You’ll feel better after you get it off your chest.”
Instead of asking what was really bothering me, I asked another question I was curious about. “How long before you knew fourteen was me? ”
His expressive brown eyes traced my face, lingering on mine for a moment before he sighed and rolled onto his back beside me. He grasped my hand, interlocking our fingers. I didn’t know if it was to ground himself or keep me from running away, but it worried me he was hesitating.
“I wasn’t completely sure until before the motorcycle commission. Charley offered to tell me, but I didn’t ask.”
He seemed a bit too timid to share the details with me, but he wasn’t lying any longer, so that was a start. And when he turned his face to stare at me, all the passion and intensity I’d been convinced might not exist sparked brightly between us. But tucked underneath his warm covers, his large hand anchoring me to him, it was time to come clean with each other. I was serious when I’d told him I wouldn’t tolerate any more lies.
“But you suspected something before that.” Looking back, all the teasing comments with Charley about Seven were a red flag. If I hadn’t been so worried about his overwhelming presence, I should have noticed that something wasn’t right.
“The rambling during the date was when I started wondering, but after our first conversation, I didn’t want to stop. The better I got to know you, the easier it was to ignore that I wasn’t telling you the truth. Although, I was jealous of myself there for a few days, when you seemed to be more interested in talking to him than me.”
He’d said that last night, too. That he wanted me to choose him and not Seven. But looking back on it, even though I didn’t know it at the time, the parts of Reid’s personality that drew me to him in real life were what gained my attention with Seven.
“Which I still think is stupid, but I get it now. You wanted me to like you for you, not because of a man who charmed me through a wall when I let my guard down.”
“I know I should have come clean right away, but I knew you’d be embarrassed about the things you said to me and would probably pull away. I’m not ashamed to admit I saw an opening to make you see me and I took it. ”
“Did the two of you plan the whole thing? Was it all a lie? Am I that gullible?”
Charley’s part in orchestrating and concealing the whole thing still hurt, too. She’d been my best friend since we were children, and to have her go behind my back and help with manipulating my emotions was hard to reconcile.
“No, she didn’t ask me to do it until you were locked in that bathroom you love so much after telling me I could keep the penis.”
My cheeks heated at my unintentional slip, but I could honestly say I no longer wanted Reid to keep the penis. It was mine now. Or it would be once he gave up the goods.
“Are you sure she didn’t tell you what my number was? Feed you flirty things to say to me?”
“No Haz,” he whispered, leaning in and pressing his lips to my forehead. “Our conversation was genuine, and it also kind of cemented what I’d suspected for months. That maybe my feelings for you weren’t so one sided.”
“But I didn’t know it was you.”
“And that’s why you let your guard down and actually talked to me. Because we both know if I randomly started flirting with you in real life, you would’ve gone back to pushing me away.”
“But then you did start flirting with me in real life.”
He chuckled, drawing me in close and tucking my head beneath his chin. His warm hands cupped my shoulders, and my body relaxed as his fingertips traced my shoulder blades. “I think that conversation through a wall unlocked something inside me. I told you I was willing to do just about anything to make you mine.”
“There’s that was word again. Makes me think that you’re planning to phone it in now that you’ve gotten me into your bed.”
“Then maybe I need to do something about that. Since I didn’t exactly get the Valentine’s date that I’d been hoping for.”
“You mean having your bestie’s little sister yelling at you for being a dumbass and then shoving her hand down your pants isn’t your idea of a romantic date?” I giggled, tracing my fingers through the dark hair covering his chest. One of his piercings was almost at eye level, and since it was right there, I moved my head forward, grasping the little ball on the end with my teeth and tugging. Reid’s answering groan and the flex of his hips into mine was like a shot of adrenaline, and I did it again, enjoying this newfound power over him.
“ Kitten ,” he growled, pulling me closer and digging his fingertips into my skin. “What are you doing to me?”
“I would’ve thought with your extensive experience you could figure it out,” I whispered into his chest, my fingertips skating down his firm stomach toward the trail of hair my hand had followed last night.
But Mr. Suddenly Responsible intercepted it, interlacing our fingers and pulling them between our chests instead of letting me greet his morning wood in a mutually enjoyable manner.
“While I would love to rip that lace off of you—”
“Yes, please,” I giggled, placing a lingering kiss on his collarbone.
“You asked me to prove that you could trust me, and while I know we would both enjoy it, fucking you this morning isn’t the way to do that.”
Pouting, I tried not to be disappointed at his rejection, but the romantic inside me was swooning a little at his restraint. Even if he was being a giant cockblock. Which I had not known he was capable of. But I had to admit, his protective and respectful side was sexy.
“You don’t want to play a little, just the tip ?” I teased, thinking that the hardware on his tip would probably do some very enjoyable things to my lady parts.
“Haz, you’re killing me,” he groaned, rolling onto his back and pulling me on top of him. I rested my chin on his chest, and his fingers combed through my chaotic hair as he gazed up at me.
The way he looked at me now was still a bit shocking. It was laced with a tenderness that made me want to throw my panties at him, but it was also helping with his case to convince me that his feelings were genuine and not just driven by secondhand, horny illustration hormones.
Part of me wished his camera was set up right now, because I wanted to capture this moment, to draw the two of us in his bed, our bodies pressed together with only some scraps of lace and a pair of inconvenient plaid pajama pants separating us. Maybe I’d have to start drawing some illicit illustrations from memory soon, because I knew my mental source material library was going to get a catalog update—and soon.
At least, it would when Reid finally stopped being so honorable about it.
“Let me take you out before I—”
“Slip it in?” I supplied, enjoying the way his eyes rolled and the rumble that ran through his chest at my suggestive interruptions.
“What am I going to do with you?” he whispered into my lips, craning his neck forward to kiss me.
"I told you I had a list."
I should have been worried about morning breath when his palm cradled the back of my head and his tongue slipped into my mouth, slowly coaxing mine in a way that had my toes curling, but it only made me want him that much more.