Warren’s Diary
Warren’s Diary
The Authority have used media to make vampirism seductive to the humans, making it easier for them to accept it when we are one day known to the world.
I’m honestly impressed with how quickly mortals began to fantasize about living forever, but I shouldn’t be.
I once was a human, in love with an immortal, picturing a life where we would be together forever.
I asked Lena recently where Levette is. She says he is still in New Orleans, to the best of her knowledge.
I called bullshit on that straight away, but I didn’t press further.
She’s been more forthcoming recently and her letters have been more frequent.
A coven member recently let slip that Levette is on Lena’s payroll, supplying all her American clubs with alcohol and letting her know when any vampires in the city step out of line.
I hate that they get to see and speak to each other, but I am forever outcast.
I think Lena’s lonely, too. I miss her. She told me that she’d ‘said goodbye’ again, and I know that means she lost Ria recently. I wish I was there to comfort her.
Levette is always on my mind recently. I’ve tried to get him out of my system, to party and hunt and do anything to keep my mind preoccupied. But it never works. I’ve been debating dropping my walls and calling out to him.
That seems like a bad idea.
Right?
Anyway, I went to a concert yesterday. A Tejano singer called Selena performed on stage, and I was blown away.
Her voice was mesmerizing. It amazes me the ways in which the world constantly changes.
The bass made it feel as though my heart was thumping, beating for the first time in too long.
She roared over the sea of her chanting fans, uniting mortals who were usually so divided.
I hope to meet her one day, perhaps when the world has more knowledge of my kind. I will ask her how music makes her feel and the songs that make her feel connected to her fellow humankind.
In my youth, music was something rare and cherished. The gramophone playing a record while candles illuminated the room. It was beautiful and daunting, even if my life back then was less than picturesque.
I first experienced true music that first night on the bayou with Levette. The raw, husky voices made the emotion real, capturing the heartache and longing that everyone seemed to have. It was folk music, spiritual yearning—it called to my soul.
Now, the world is quite literally their stage. They can dance and sing however they like and are free to express themselves.
Sometimes, it makes me despondent. I imagine what it would be like to live this new, free life with Levette.
Would I feel less judged and be able to hold his hand without worrying about society condemning us?
Would I finally allow myself the freedom to proudly admit my love and say screw everything else?
Wondering can be painful, too.
Discovering the world on my own is not something I particularly enjoy.
I spend my evenings exploring, being a tourist in every place I visit.
I follow the crowds and find myself attending musical concerts for the first time, and yet it makes my soul ache more.
Each place I find, every discovery that makes me smile, my isolation becomes more evident.
I want to share it all with Levy, yet to do so would break us both.
Even the immortal world is cruel.
– Warren