4. Onesti
"So, what are you gonna do today? I wish I could spend the day with you," Jarielle says.
Today is my off day, and pampering will be my agenda. Unlike most, I simply want to enjoy trivial things, such as enjoying me, myself, and I, without the pressure of anyone else.
"The first order of business is enjoying one of the specialty coffees at Sipping Thangs Beverages. I plan to sip my coffee while indulging in a quiet space to read with no strings attached."
"Are you really gonna waste the day reading?" Jarielle asks with a bite in her tone that causes me to giggle.
Spending the day reading might appear to be a waste, but to me, it's the perfect way to relax my mind and bask in a pastime that is often scarce for me. In addition to working at the hospital, I attend a survivor's group several times weekly. Initially, I went to deal with the loss of my grandmother. However, I then started going to support the attendees once I was able to come to terms with my grief.
"Don't come for me. Reading is therapeutic, and a girl needs a little therapy to get through some days." My lips upturn because I know Jarielle's comeback can go one of two ways.
Toxic or reserved… how are you coming, bestie?
"This is why you need to spend more time sitting and spinning on something long, veiny, and strong because reading on a day off is ridiculous."
"My Bible tells me that he that findeth a?—"
"Girl, bye. A man ain't gonna be able to find you with your head buried in a book. At least go to the pussy barn and let Ming wax that coochie so it'll be ready whenever God whispers your name in your wannabe man's ear."
"Who is Ming?" I ask, laughing.
"The chick that pulls your baby hairs from your coochie, leaving you crying from the first pull of her wax strip. On second thought, never mind. I forgot you ain't about that life."
My thighs clench at the thought of having my pearl torn in two by some random wax lady.
"Uh, the very thought of it has me pondering letting my lower region become a part of the Amazon Rainforest," I comment, and a shiver slides down my back.
"You would never, especially when I know you use that little funky trimmer you keep trying to convince me is better than Ming."
"Don't come for my trimmer. That was the best TikTok purchase I've ever made."
"Alright. I gotta go give Brent some attention but enjoy your day, boo."
"Will do." Placing my phone on my bed, I head to the bathroom to get the day moving with a bounce in my step and a smile on my face.
* * *
Thud. Crash.
My body jerks when I enter the doorway of Sipping Thangs Beverages after colliding with someone attempting to exit.
"Shit!" a masculine voice shouts, causing my eyes to bulge at the person standing in front of me with brown liquid instantly transforming the color of the white shirt beneath the navy suit jacket.
Asaiah Harrison. Crap. This man probably thinks I did this on purpose after his repulsive attitude toward me at the hospital. It can't be further from the truth, but goodness, this is bad.
"Oh my God! I'm so sorry," I blurt, moving to do something, although I'm unsure what since I have nothing in my hand but my tablet and purse.
"Nah. I don't need help from you. Next time, watch where you're going. Damn. Now I'm gonna be late for work since I'll have to return home to change."
My eyes glisten with water at the hard edge of the man's tone, and I helplessly move out of the way when Asaiah's deep frown matches the angry lines on his forehead. Tossing the coffee cup in his hand in the nearby trash, Asaiah exits without another backward glance.
I'm struggling because Asaiah is attractive, yet the storms in his eyes every time I see him have me fighting to acknowledge my attraction toward him. What's worse is the panty-wetting tingles I feel whenever I stare into those same eyes. Asaiah has a low-cut fade with curls, enhancing what other men showcase with waves. Asaiah's masculine facial structure is appealing and handsome enough to speak to a woman's libido without him opening his mouth, not to mention the full, medium-sized beard with a few gray streaks contradicting his age.
I vaguely recall from his information during his x-rays that he's in his thirties. From the suit Asaiah had been wearing, I assume he has a high-profile job. However, Asaiah's words and disposition make all of his attractive attributes make him look like a gargoyle.
"Why are you so quiet, Onesti? I've been talking for ten minutes, and you haven't said one word in response." My mom's voice snaps me out of my encounter with Asaiah Harrison this morning.
"What would you do if you keep seeing someone whose pain nearly shouts at you whenever you're in their presence?"
An image of Asaiah's face and stormy eyes fill my mind, pushing the question to the surface. I have zero clue what Mom had been babbling about, but I can't shake the encounters with Asaiah to save my life.
"Hm. That depends on what level of pain you're referencing. I have encountered people whose pain hasn't allowed me to intervene because of their response to getting free. Then there are those I've met whose pain had me sitting up at night while petitioning God on behalf of their torment. So, it depends," Mom responds.
This is why Lachelle Jeffries is one-half of my sounding board. She doesn't hesitate to give me things to think about versus supplying me with automatic answers. A tingling sensation on my arms and the back of my neck prevents me from readily responding. Heat fills my face, causing my brows to hike, and I lift my head, looking from left to right before my breath stalls upon connecting with an intense gaze. Asaiah. My brain speaks his name with a slight tremble, and all movement ceases when Asaiah heads toward me.
Oh God! Didn't I have enough of an encounter with his man?
Not wanting to change my plans for today despite my run-in with Asaiah, I'm sitting at a booth near the bank of windows at Sipping Thangs Beverages. My Kindle is no longer showing the book I haven't been able to get into, which is why I called Mom in the first place.
"Had I known you would still be here, I would have come over before placing my order."
The softness in Asaiah's granitelike face has my breath hitching due to the unfamiliar expression within his eyes. If it weren't for my getting a good look at the tightness around his eyes and the complex expression, this moment might convince me that Asaiah has a twin or doppelganger.
I wonder if he'd be open to me telling him how much I prefer this version of who he presents to others.
"Who’s that?" Mom's question reminds me of her existence on the phone.
The earpiece I'm wearing makes it pointless to hold my phone, and watching Asaiah's arrival had me forgetting all about my poor mother.
"The pain," I whisper.
"I thought I would let you know that you nearly caused third-degree burns this morning with your clumsy self. I also missed an important meeting since I had to change clothes," Asaiah grumbles with his heavy gaze on me, causing my breathing to become erratic.
"He has a nice voice," Mom interjects before I can respond to Asaiah.
Tuh, nice doesn't fit the voice with a unique force that has me wanting to hear him call my name while dipping his tongue in the juices he's creating in my lower region right now.
"Mhm," I whisper with my eyes slowly assessing Asaiah.
Mm. He traded the navy suit for a black dress shirt and light blue slacks. Hm. He has some long and th—oh my, is that his… Lord, have mercy.
My gaze lingers on Asaiah's right thigh, where something massive appears to be resting like an anaconda. My mouth becomes dry, forcing me to pick up my tea to take a healthy drink from the mug with the shop's logo.
"My eyes are up here," Asaiah directs, taunting or teasingly. I'm unable to identify which because it takes me a minute to pull my gaze from the lower half of his body.
The velvety-smooth, soothing yet disconcerting voice of Asaiah has me pondering what octave he would use while pushing in and out of my?—
Whoa. Merciful, Jesus. Sweet Father of all creation on this earth, please help to reel my mind back to a non-sexual place.
"Um, please forgive me for spilling your coffee this morning. I would be happy to buy you another one," I offer a few seconds later.
My pearl and chest seem to be in sync with an intense cadence the longer Asaiah stares intently into me. My clit moistens, and my body heat increases, making me fight the urge to squirm or cross my legs to silence the purring happening below.
"Harrison!" the barista shouts, causing Asaiah's gaze to shift from me to the direction of the voice.
"Already taken care of." With that, Asaiah walks away with a swag that has me wanting to pant like a thirsty kitten in search of milk.
My… my… my…
"Well, that was an interesting exchange. From your silence, I think I need to change my advice to… see what the Lord says," Mom says with laughter in her words, but I'm unable to acknowledge her due to watching Asaiah smoothly exit the beverage shop.
* * *
"Ugh."
Kicking the blankets off my legs, I stare at the ceiling, trying to shake the thoughts plaguing my mind about a man who has been hot and cold since meeting him. It didn't help that Mom kept going on and on about the mystery man with a sensually smooth voice deep enough to melt butter on a summer day. The only reason she let the conversation go was that Dad walked into the room and let it be known who my mom should focus her energy on.
"Now God, the first time I saw that man, I could believe it was a part of my job, but it's been three times, so is there something I need to know? I haven't seen this man a day in my life, and within a week, I keep having some type of interaction with him. What's the message for me in this?"
Do you trust me?
The question wrinkles my brows and stumps me momentarily because I'm unsure how to answer it without fear of catching His wrath.
Do you really trust me? Do you have enough faith in me that the reminder of Proverbs 3:5 can quiet the doubt, questions, or request for a roadmap? To trust in Me is to know without knowing the way and that I know the plans I think toward you. No matter what path you take in this life, I am that I am.
"Forgive me, Father. I often get in my way and want to remove You from a thing before learning. You make a difference in every area of my life. Forgive me for wanting to take the reins from you despite being incapable of guiding my footsteps better than You can. Forgive me for doubting Your plan and will for my life. Can you help me? I don't know how to handle Asaiah, and I trust that if you keep crossing our paths, there is a purpose in the exchanges. While I don't understand what's going on with Asaiah, You do, and I will trust in You. You be God, and I'll let you guide me however you see fit.”
It is well. For we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good. Therefore, you don't have to worry, nor do you have to fret any longer. If I said it, then that settles it.
Water slips from the corners of my eyes at the still, small voice echoing within my mind with the necessary reminder. Sometimes, I can get so in my head that I ignore God's voice of reason or direction. In addition to my attraction to Asaiah, I feel something magnetic whenever I'm in his presence. I can't explain my pull toward Asaiah, but I know it goes beyond my physical reaction to him. It's crazy for me to react this way to Asaiah because the men I've dated haven't had such an effect on me in the past. Until Roy's betrayal, I thought he would be the man I spent my life with, but even with that, there wasn't an ounce of electricity flowing through my body while in his presence. I'm unsure what God has up His sleeve, but until he makes it clear, I'm gonna wait and be of good cheer.