Chapter 8
eight
. . .
Wren
I was relieved that Axel and I had agreed to repair our friendship. We still had some apprehension, probably on both of our parts, but it was nice to let go of all that anger.
I didn’t miss the way he’d winced when I said I regretted that night we’d spent together.
The night we’d both poured our hearts out to one another.
Made promises that we shouldn’t have made.
It changed everything.
It ruined everything.
Maybe I’d have handled the betrayal differently if I’d been able to confront him, but hearing that he’d taken another woman home the night after being with me—it was a gut punch.
And I’d never reacted well to gut punches.
Fight or flight was a real thing, and when I was hurt, I always took flight.
“Hey,” he said as he walked over to where I was brushing Wrax in the stall. Axel had this lazy smile on his face that always did strange things to me.
I pushed that thought away before stepping out of the stall and pulling the door closed. I’d taken Wrax out for another long ride this morning, as he was still acclimating to his new home.
For the second time in just a few weeks.
But Rosewood River was ultimately home to both me and Wrax. It was where it had all started.
“Hey.”
“My mom wants you to come to Sunday dinner tonight at Aunt Ellie and Uncle Keaton’s. She misses you.” He crossed his arms over his chest as if he was prepared for me to argue with him.
“I miss her, too. I’d love to go.”
The Chadwicks were my second family growing up.
And Isabelle Chadwick was a second mother to me.
She and I had stayed in touch even after Axel and I had stopped speaking.
She’d never pushed or gotten involved in our falling out.
But she’d followed all my competitions and sent me texts to congratulate me after every single one.
“Oh. I’d prepared for a fight.”
“Not everything is a fight, Cowboy,” I chuckled. I snatched his hat off his head and popped it on mine as I ran toward the door at the end of the barn.
He chased me just like he always did, snaking an arm around my waist when he caught me before tugging me against him. He turned me around so that I was facing him, then pressed my back up against the barn door and smiled down at me.
“You always looked better in my hat anyway,” he said, his voice gruff as my chest brushed against his.
“You look damn good in a hat, and you know it.” My heart thumped rapidly against my chest, but I tried to appear unaffected.
But I was not unaffected.
“You know the saying, right?” he said. He leaned in even closer, standing a good foot taller than me.
The smell of leather and mint filled my senses.
“‘Don’t steal a dude’s hat if you can’t outrun him’?” I said, and I couldn’t hide the smile from my face.
He laughed. “I know there aren’t too many true cowboys out there in your world, but surely, you’ve been around enough to know the saying.”
I rolled my eyes. “Let’s hear it, oh wise one.”
“You wear the hat, you ride the cowboy, Wren.” His voice was gruff, and the little smear of dirt on his cheek made him all the more sexy.
I pulled the hat off and pushed up on my tiptoes to set it on his head. “Been there, done that, Cowboy.”
He chuckled, stepping back when I pressed my hands against his chest.
I needed space.
Air.
Ever since we’d made peace with working on our friendship, we’d quickly fallen into old habits.
There was just a comfort there that I’d never felt with anyone else.
I craved it. I yearned for it.
But I also feared it.
“That bad, huh?” he asked, and his smile looked forced.
Was he actually wounded?
The man had devastated me.
“I’m going to go catch a shower before we head to dinner at your aunt and uncle’s,” I said, ignoring the question.
He nodded and adjusted his hat. “Yeah, me too. See you in forty-five minutes.”
But it was the way his eyes stayed on me as I glanced over my shoulder to see him watching me.
It was that exact look that had gotten me into this situation in the first place.
Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice—not going to happen.
I hurried upstairs and kicked off my boots in the little living room area.
The apartment was furnished, and it had everything I needed.
Apparently, Jonah had lived here for a few months when he first took the job as well.
It was decorated exactly as I’d expect from Axel.
It was sort of rustic, ranch chic with a painting of a gorgeous horse hanging over the worn brown leather couch.
The views from up here were gorgeous, with rolling mountains in the distance, and I even had a little corner view of the river from the bedroom window.
My phone vibrated, and I glanced down to see a message from my father. My stomach twisted, as I hadn’t spoken to him in a while.
Dad
Hey, sweetheart. I’m sorry I’ve been so distant. We’ve been busy getting Chrissy moved into the house. But I’d like to see you tomorrow when Collin comes to town. Can we have dinner?
I sighed. I was so angry at him for so many reasons, but he was still my father.
I still loved him. I wasn’t someone who could just shut off my feelings and stop caring.
Hence the fact that I’d stayed away from my best friend for two years because it was too painful to see him after everything had happened.
Dinner works.
Dad
Looking forward to it, sweetheart.
We have a lot to catch up on.
Dad
We do. Coach Sharky and I have both been on the lookout for the right horse, and I believe we’ve found him. He’s a real winner, just like you. I think you’ll be a perfect match.
Un-freaking-believable.
No mention of the divorce or my mother.
No mention of selling Wrax.
He was just on to the next horse. It was very telling about my father. I wouldn’t tell him about getting Wrax back until we were face to face.
I have zero intention of competing with a different horse. We can talk more about it at dinner.
Dad
Well, you’re not going to make the Olympic team on foot. Sometimes you have to pivot to get what you want. It’s time to pivot, Wren.
I shook my head with disbelief at the way he’d just ignored everything I’d said.
See you soon, Dad.
I dialed my mother as I opened the refrigerator and pulled out the ready-made cookie dough and filled two cookie sheets. I wanted to have something to bring to dinner tonight.
“Hey, sweetheart,” she said, her voice sounding more upbeat than it had in a while. I placed the cookies in the oven and closed the door.
“Hi, Mom. How’s Aunt Becky?”
“She’s good. We’re actually having a great time. It’s the most relaxed I’ve been in months.”
I’d called her immediately to tell her about Wrax, and she was thrilled for me. I’d asked her not to mention it to my father or my brother until I’d told them myself.
“Good. You deserve that.” I cleared my throat. “Collin is coming to town tomorrow, and I’m going to dinner with him and Dad. I just wanted you to know.”
“I’m glad you’re doing that. I’m worried about you,” she said, and I heard the concern in her voice. “I just hope they can both see beyond themselves for a few moments to be there for you.”
“I’m fine, Mom. I’m worried about you, too.”
“You know what, I’m actually the happiest I’ve been in a very long time. And I found the piece of property in Rosewood River where I want to build my home. It’s right on the water, and I’m going to have a barn built just for you and Wrax.”
“That’s great news, Mom. And I’m proud of you because I know it’s not easy to walk away from someone you love.” I knew from experience.
“That’s true, but I think if you love someone and they don’t love you back the way you deserve to be loved, it makes it easier to walk away. Even if it takes you many years to figure it out.”
I nodded in understanding. “That makes sense.”
“Aunt Becky is shouting for me to come watch a movie with her,” she said with a chuckle. She sounded light and happy, and it made my chest squeeze. “I’ll talk to you later this week. Love you, Wren.”
“Love you, too,” I said before ending the call.
I padded my way to the bathroom, turned on the water to the shower, stripped down, and stepped beneath the hot stream of water.
I thought about what my mother had said.
If you love someone and they don’t love you back the way you deserve to be loved, it makes it easier to walk away.
That had been the biggest challenge when I’d walked away from Axel. No one had ever made me feel more loved. He’d always been my biggest cheerleader. Biggest supporter.
I’d never doubted that Axel would do anything for me, and vice versa.
In a heartbeat.
It was our promise.
Our thing.
And then we’d gone and messed it all up.
I squeezed my eyes closed as I rinsed the shampoo from my hair, and memories of our night together flooded my thoughts, just like they had almost daily over the last two years. I’d been pining for a man I’d forced myself to stay away from.
But these thoughts were all-consuming.
The way he’d touched me.
The way he’d kissed me.
The way he’d buried his head between my thighs.
How could I still remember it so vividly?
It had happened so long ago. But I could still feel his hands on me. His lips on mine.
My hand slid down my body, between my thighs, as a dull ache begged for release.
My breaths came faster.
I imagined him dropping to his knees and spreading my legs apart, just like he’d done that night.
My head fell back as my fingers circled my clit.
A piercing sound blasted my thoughts, and it took me a minute to realize what was happening.
I quickly pulled my hand away, listening as the sound grew even louder when I turned the water off.
The smoke alarm was going off.
Fire.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
I stumbled out of the shower, grabbed a towel without even wrapping it around myself, yanked the door open, and hurried toward the kitchen.
As I came down the hallway, the front door burst open, and Axel charged into the house.
“Are you all right?” he shouted as he ran toward the smoking oven.
He turned it off and found the oven mitts sitting on the counter.
He pulled the burned cookies from the oven and yanked open the back door to the little patio before setting the pan outside.
I was just standing there in shock, holding the towel in front of me as I dripped all over the floor, and he rushed back to me.
He put a hand on each side of my face. “Are you hurt?”
“What? No.” I shook my head. “I was in the shower. I must have forgotten to set the timer when I put the cookies in the oven. I wanted to bring something to Sunday dinner.” His gaze moved down, and he smirked.
“You don’t say?” he chuckled before reaching for the towel I was holding in front of me, reminding me that I hadn’t wrapped it around myself.
He pulled it around me, then tucked the end into the terry fabric to keep it in place.
“If you wanted me to see you naked, you didn’t need to burn the house down, Horse Girl. You could have just told me.”
I smacked him in the chest, horrified at the fact that I’d just set off the smoke alarm and run out here naked.
“Oh my gosh,” I groaned. “I just forgot about the cookies.”
He turned and grabbed the dish towel from the counter, waving it around to get the smoke to move outside. “You sure about that?”
“I’m not even justifying that with an answer.”
He dropped the towel on the counter as a wicked grin spread across his handsome face. “Maybe you just don’t know how to answer the question. See you in a little bit. Try not to burn the place down in the next fifteen minutes.”
I rolled my eyes and pointed at the door. “Go.”
He was still laughing when he pulled the door closed behind him.
And I groaned and made my way back to the bathroom.
Axel Chadwick was consuming my thoughts.
I’d nearly burned the place down while fantasizing about him in the shower.
I needed to pull myself together.