Chapter 25
twenty-five
. . .
Wren
It felt strange to be at my childhood home. Not only because my mother was no longer here, but because Chrissy was now living in it. Caroline and I had exchanged several glances, and that didn’t require any words.
This is fucking weird.
I was so grateful to have Axel here with me; otherwise, this would have been insufferable.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” Chrissy said. “It means a lot to your father, and it actually means a lot to me.”
She’d worked for my father for several years, but I didn’t know her well. I’d never cared for her, because the few times I’d stopped by his office, I’d thought their interactions were a bit too friendly.
Clearly my instincts had been correct.
Sabrina had been fired shortly after my mother found out about his affair many years ago, even though at this point it seemed obvious that my father had been unfaithful to my mother numerous times.
“Okay,” I said, because what the hell else could I say? I didn’t want to be here. But this was my father, and I wanted to salvage whatever I could of our relationship.
Axel squeezed my hand as we moved to the living room. Caroline soon brought us each a glass of champagne.
Again, she and I exchanged a look that spoke a thousand words.
I couldn’t imagine how difficult it must have been for her to be working here full-time with Chrissy, when she and my mom were so close. I knew she was counting down the days until my mom built her new home and she could go work for her.
“Mine is sparkling water, just in case you’re wondering,” Chrissy said as she rubbed her hand over her stomach. My eyes nearly bulged out of my head when I saw the large engagement ring on her finger.
The ink wasn’t even dry on his divorce papers, and he’d already put a ring on her finger.
I supposed the fact that they were having a child was speeding up the timeline.
I cleared my throat and looked at my father. “Are you engaged?”
“That’s what we wanted to tell you, but we wanted to wait until Collin and Farah arrived.”
My shoulders stiffened. “You didn’t tell me they were coming.”
“He’s your brother, sweetheart. Family is everything. You need to make amends, and this seemed like the perfect occasion to bring everyone together.”
Axel looked at my father, but he didn’t speak. He would follow my lead tonight, which I appreciated.
“I mean, if you want to be real, we can be real.” I cleared my throat.
“Please,” Chrissy said. “We want to understand what you’re feeling.”
“What I’m feeling?” I asked sarcastically.
I glanced over at Axel, who gave me the slightest nod, as if I should get it off my chest. “I’m back in the home where I grew up, and the woman my father cheated on my mother with is now living here and pregnant with his child.
His divorce to my mother is not even finalized, and you’re announcing your engagement.
And then you blindside me by inviting my brother, whom I’m currently not speaking to because he’s lied to me so many times that I don’t even feel like I know him.
So yeah, Chrissy, I’m not feeling so great about being here. ”
“That’s fair, Wren,” she said, and I actually saw empathy in her gaze, which surprised me.
“I hate the way you found out about us. And I hate that this is uncomfortable for you. But I’m pregnant, and I want our child to know his or her siblings.
It’s important to me. So tell me how to make this okay for you, and I’ll do whatever it takes to move forward. ”
I blew out a breath. “I don’t know how to make this okay. But I’m here, and that’s the best I can do.”
“I think that’s the most anyone can ask of you,” Axel said, his face hard as he looked at my father.
We all turned as my brother and Farah stepped into the room.
My gaze met his, and I quickly looked away.
We did the fake half-hug thing, and Axel gave my brother and Farah a nod but didn’t attempt to hug either one of them.
We hadn’t expected to see them, and he was probably feeling as awkward as I was.
Caroline called us to the dining room, which definitely broke the uncomfortable silence in the room. She set our salad plates down in front of us.
Axel and I sat on one side of the table, and my brother and Farah were seated across from us. Dad and Chrissy each sat at opposite ends.
Chrissy was in my mother’s seat, and I just wanted this night to be over.
“So, have you been training?” Dad asked, diverting his attention to me.
“I have been, yes.”
“And you still think Wrax is up for this? Because Coach Sharky and I both feel strongly about the horse we found. He’s really spectacular. An Olympic-worthy horse. I think it might be worth it for you to go check him out. We could go together. He’s in Maryland.”
I shook my head. “I’m going to be riding Wrax, and if there comes a point that I don’t think he’s up to it, I will be finding and purchasing my own horse.
I don’t ever want to go through what you both put me and Wrax through again.
So any horse I ride will be in my name only.
But I feel confident saying that Wrax and I will retire at the same time.
We’ve been a team, and that’s how I intend to go out. ”
“And is the horse your boyfriend bought for you in your name only?” Collin hissed.
“Of course he is,” Axel said calmly. “He’s Wren’s horse. As it should be.”
“And you just bought back a horse for someone you hadn’t spoken to in two years?” my brother pressed.
“Correct.” Axel held his stare, and if looks could kill, Collin would have been a dead man. “Because that horse is her family. And regardless of whether we were speaking or not, he belongs to her, and it’s appalling that anyone would sell him without her consent. But that’s just my opinion.”
“I agree that it wasn’t handled correctly,” Dad said.
“But the motivation wasn’t sinister, Axel.
I don’t think that Wrax is up for the job, and after they had that accident, I lost my trust in him.
Wren is too attached, and I knew she wouldn’t ever admit it was time to retire him.
” He raised his wine glass for Caroline to refill it.
“Wrax and I have had worse accidents over the years, Dad. It comes with the territory. I wish I could believe that it came from a place of concern, but I don’t.
” I shrugged as Caroline placed our dinner plates in front of us.
I smiled up at her because her chicken marsala had always been my favorite, and I appreciated that she’d made it for me.
“So you don’t believe that I’m worried about you? Then why would I want to sell Wrax?”
“Because your ego was wounded that we lost,” I said. “You are used to me winning. You like me winning. And it was a way to control the situation, while punishing both me and Wrax for not performing well since the world championship.”
“I mean, this family has dedicated a lot of time and money to your dream, Wren,” my brother said. “So wanting you to win is not a sin. If you aren’t winning, why the hell are we even wasting time on it?”
I snorted because he was outrageous. “Do you hear yourself? You can’t always win. No one can. It’s a sport, and one that Wrax and I have been successful at. We’ve put in the work and we were world champions just five months ago, so how about you don’t write us off the moment things get tough.”
“I think you’re amazing, Wren,” Farah said, breaking the tension. “I remember going with Emerson years ago to see you compete, and you were just starting out. And what a career you’ve had.”
Collin scoffed.
Axel narrowed his gaze as if it was taking everything he had not to blast her for bringing up Emerson’s name after what she’d done to her.
“Thank you.” I forced a smile. I actually felt sorry for Farah after watching the way my brother dismissed what she’d just said, irritated that it had derailed the conversation, when I was fairly certain that everyone else at the table was relieved.
“So, I hate to change the subject, but we called you all here because we have news,” Chrissy said. “We already shared it with Wren and Axel. But we wanted you two to know that your father and I are engaged.”
“Wow,” my brother said. “The divorce isn’t even final, and you’ve moved into our mother’s home, you’re pregnant with our father’s child, and you called us here to tell us that you’re engaged?
You’re moving fast, Chrissy. And Dad, how about a little respect for the woman you were married to not that long ago. ”
Axel snorted beside me, and everyone turned to look at him.
“I’m sorry. I think I choked on the hypocrisy in the room,” Axel said, and I tried to cover my smile.
My father and my brother were clearly not all that different.
“That’s right, the Chadwick family members are all perfect, right?” Collin said, and Farah shot him a warning look.
“You know what, Collin?” Axel wiped his mouth with his napkin before dropping it in his lap again.
“If you tried owning your shit just one time in your life, instead of attacking everyone around you, you’d have some hope of fixing things with your sister.
But instead, you’re trying to make this about me and my family.
The hypocrisy that I’m speaking of starts and ends here with you. ”
“I was going through a hard time, and I did some things that I regret,” my brother said, looking directly at me. “I messed up when I lied to you about Axel, and I’ve owned it. I was hurting, and it was a selfish thing to do.”
“This family is so messed up.” I groaned as I looked at my brother and my dad. “You’ve both lied so many times, it’s hard to keep it all straight. And at the end of the day, you’ve both punished me for the mistakes you’ve made, and that’s just not okay.”
“That is not true, sweetheart. How did I punish you?” my father asked.
“Dad,” I said, shaking my head. “You begged me not to tell Mom about an affair you had years ago. You asked me to carry a secret that would hurt my relationship with my mother. You put me in the middle, when you should have been the adult and owned it. But I had to be the one to tell Mom, and fortunately she surprised me because she already knew about it. She thanked me for telling her, and she was the one who apologized on your behalf for putting me in a horrible situation. But then, you were angry with me for doing the right thing, and our entire relationship changed after that.”
“I handled it wrong. I thought you were being disloyal,” he admitted.
“You thought I was disloyal, when you were having sex with another woman while married to our mother. Take a look in the mirror, Dad. You punished me for a crime that you committed.” I turned my attention to Collin.
“And then you cheated on your fiancée, with her best friend, and you decided to hurt my relationship with Axel because you didn’t want to suffer alone.
Are we seeing how twisted and messed up this is? ”
Farah had her hand on her chest, and she had so much empathy when she looked at me that it nearly made me cry.
But I wouldn’t cry here. Not tonight. Not in front of the two men I’d loved so much who had hurt me so badly.
“How can I fix this?” my dad asked.
“I honestly don’t know. I think moving forward, we worry less about how I perform at events and more about our relationship.
I don’t want you looking at horses or talking to Coach Sharky.
Just try being my father, and we’ll see if we can repair things from there.
” I took a drink. “And maybe we don’t do dinners at the home where we were raised with Mom. It feels wrong.”
“I can do that.” He nodded and glanced at Chrissy, who didn’t look pleased, but I didn’t care. This wasn’t about her right now.
“I agree. I don’t think you should be living in this house,” Collin said to her.
“But I love this house,” Chrissy said.
“Well, if you truly love my father and you actually want your future child to know his or her siblings, then I suggest you start your lives in a new home,” I said. “That would be a good start.”
“And what about us, Wren?” Collin asked.
“I honestly don’t know, Coll. I love you, you’re my brother. But I don’t trust you, and I’m not over what you did to me and Axel. It was selfish and evil, and I’m still processing it.”
“I fucked up,” he finally said as his fists came down on the table. “I’m so tired of being an asshole.”
“Then stop being an asshole,” Axel said, looking directly at my brother. “That’s how it gets better. Stop being a fucking asshole, and earn her trust back, because she loves you and this is killing her. Be a good fucking human, and do the right thing.”
I thought my brother was going to lose his shit and have a meltdown after what Axel had said to him.
But he didn’t.
He ran his hands through his hair and looked at me. “I can do that.”
“I hope that’s true.”
Axel found my hand beneath the table, and I was so grateful that he was here with me. The evening had been much heavier than I’d expected.
“Well, this was not the engagement celebration that I was hoping for.” Chrissy pushed back her chair, which skidded against the wood floors. She tossed her napkin on the table and stormed away.
My father glanced around the table and shrugged. “She’s not the best at reading the room.”
My brother laughed first, and then we all joined in because that was the understatement of the year. She’d need to choose her audience better for that particular celebration.
“I agree with Wren, Dad,” my brother said. “You need to sell the house and find a different place to live. This home has Mom written all over it.”
Dad sighed. “I know. I think that’s why I’ve been holding on to it. It’s the only part of her left that doesn’t hate me.”
I felt his words in the center of my chest. His relationship with our mother was beyond repair, and he knew it.
I just had to figure out if I could repair my own relationship with my father and my brother.
It would take a lot of work.
And I wasn’t sure if any of us were willing to do it.
I guess time will tell.