Sneak Peek #3
Yep, it was definitely better this way, because weird or not, at least the knot I’d had in my stomach after reading Tyler’s original text was gone.
I mean, sure, “Daddy” was a guy—a guy who was a stranger and seemed kind of flirty, but also actually really nice—but even though that meant he was probably gay and I definitely wasn’t, I’d still take a gay Daddy telling me he was proud of me for being a good boy over offending a terrifying dominatrix in leather.
I finished off my new drink and then realized I’d left that last message on read for long enough that I was officially the asshole now.
Not that it probably mattered in the long run since we didn’t actually know each other, but it still felt rude.
Especially since Gay Daddy had been so great about the whole thing.
Like, actually kind of super great. A little bit funny, a whole lot patient, and really, really nice even if it was in a way that made me feel sort of weird and squirmy inside.
I should at least let him know that, right? It would only be polite, and he did seem to like it when I was polite.
Oh, but first, I should apologize again—apologize to him, since the first apology had been meant for not-him.
SATURDAY 12:15 AM
Ok, um, “Daddy”… sorry for misgendering you.
Well, that was Tyler, actually, and he didn’t mean it since, you know.
I stared at my phone hard, but he wasn’t reading my messages. And then I realized it sounded like I was making excuses.
“Shit,” I muttered, typing fast. I had to fix that before he did read them.
SATURDAY 12:17 AM
But I’m still sorry! I wasn’t trying to put it all on Tyler. You’ve got my apology, too.
Wait, not “too.” Tyler never apologized at all. But I am. This is my apology. I’m really sorry about tonight. Not just the misgendering, but about all of this. So… I’m sorry?
I mean, not a question.
I *am* sorry.
Oh God. What was wrong with me?
But then they all switched to read and… he didn’t reply.
I panicked.
SATURDAY 12:20 AM
I know I already said that I was sorry in the first place, but I just mean that now I’m extra sorry for bothering you tonight, since you’re you and not…
who I thought I was bothering? So I didn’t want to just leave it weird between us, not that maybe you care?
But I really want you to know that I’m sorry to you, not her.
“Her” being Tyler’s, um…
Shoot. What did I call her? Scary dominatrix would sound rude.
SATURDAY 12:21 AM
The girl he was flirting with.
Not that I wouldn’t have been sorry to her, too! I am!
Or I would be? But maybe I don’t have to be now? Because she never got Tyler’s message.
They all flipped to read as soon as I sent them, and I had no idea if that was because he was reading them and ignoring me now, or he’d walked away with his chat app open, or…
or what. But the longer it went on with no reply the more panicky I felt as I tried to find the right way to both explain and apologize at the same time.
Exp…ologize?
Apologi…ain?
Except maybe it wasn’t about finding the right way to do it, but about how I’d just done too much of it. Bothered him even more, all while trying to say how sorry I was for bothering him in the first place.
I whimpered, glad the music was so loud that no one but me would ever have to know.
And then, finally, Gay Daddy answered. He sent another string of laughing emojis, followed by—
SATURDAY 12:28 AM
Calm down, sweetheart. None of this has been a bother. You’re fine.
I relaxed, smiling a little as the tight knot in my stomach unraveled all at once. I mean, the way he kept calling me sweetheart still felt a little… weird, but gah. He was just so nice about it all.
SATURDAY 12:28 AM
Ok. Thank you.
SATURDAY 12:29 AM
Again with the manners. You really are a good boy. :)
SATURDAY 12:29 AM
Thank you.
Again.
Okay, now I was maybe back to harassing him. It probably (definitely) wasn’t cool to apologize for bothering him and then… then keep bothering him like this.
Especially because he was probably busy.
Or sleeping?
Trying to sleep.
Because if he wanted to be called “Daddy” then he was probably old, and didn’t old people consider midnight kind of late? And here I was, blowing up his phone and… and clinging.
And he wasn’t even reading my messages anymore.
I swallowed hard. Looked again. The latest two were still sitting on unread.
Maybe if I bought another drink, the bartender would talk to me after all? Because at least with him, it was his job. This guy, “Daddy,” hadn’t signed up for any of this.
SATURDAY 12:34 AM
Sorry I keep apologizing and thanking you. I mean, I’m not sorry I did both of those things, but you probably don’t want to keep hearing them so… sorry.
For the last time. :)
And… I’ll stop now.
I’m stopping, for real.
I waited a second, but there was still nothing. So… okay.
SATURDAY 12:37 AM
Um… bye?
I started to type out another one, telling him I didn’t mean that as a question, it was just a habit to use question marks when I wasn’t really sure about stuff, but then I caught myself and stopped. Really stopped. The way I’d promised him I would.
“Oh my God,” I whispered, putting my phone down—face down, just to avoid temptation.
And… seriously? Temptation? What did that even mean?
What was wrong with me right now?
My cheeks felt hot, although maybe that was just because I wasn’t used to drinking.
It was just that the way he called me a good boy made me feel just as squirmy as those sweethearts did, both hitting my people-pleasing buttons in a way that made me want to chase after more of them even though…
Well, even though he was clearly done.
Which was maybe for the best.
After all, I’d told him I wasn’t flirting, but if I kept spamming him then it might seem like I’d lied, since it still kind of felt like he’d been flirting. But since I wasn’t even gay…
Wait, had he ever actually said he was gay?
I’d just assumed.
But if he was, well… yeah. Then it was definitely for the best that it was over now, before anyone got confused.