Chapter 32 Hannah
HANNAH
As soon as the door audibly clicks behind Thomas, Julia is hounding me. “Tell me everything,” she says.
“I can’t,” I murmur. I am not about to let my grandma hear all about how I am about ready to climb Thomas like a tree and beg him to touch me. We haven’t touched since the night on the couch, and I need more. Arson is tangled in my feet, snoring loudly.
“What do you mean, you can’t? Grandma excused herself to give us a minute. It’s only Tiff and me now.”
Tiff says a quiet affirmative, letting me know my sister was telling the truth. I take a deep breath, thankful that I have this alone time with them. I’ve needed this, needed their advice. On my exhale, I tell them everything.
I tell them all about how I wasn’t sleeping, and how Thomas was my first kiss. Then, I emphasize how comfortable and safe I feel with him, how we’ve done more than kiss now too, and how nervous I am for the next step, even though I feel ready.
They listen intently, only popping in the occasional reactionary noises and affirmations as they do.
“And now, I can’t stop drooling every time I see him, especially when he wears his glasses at night,” I finish with a groan.
“Oh, you’ve got it bad,” Tiff says with a laugh.
“I do,” I confirm, dropping my head into my hands.
“And you’re comfortable with him?” Julia asks, ever the big sister.
“As comfortable as I’ve ever been with someone. I’m sure I’ll be anxious and stuff, but I want to take this next step. I’m ready for the intimacy with him.”
“Then go for it. I can’t say that your first time is all that amazing, at least mine wasn’t. Then again, it was with a man,” Julia jokes. “But seriously, Han. If you’re comfortable with him, and are ready to have that connection with him, then go for it. You deserve a good dicking down.”
“You did not just say that,” I laugh.
“I did! And it’s true! You deserve it. Thomas is a great guy, Hannah. He’ll take care of you.”
“He already does take care of me,” I reiterate.
“Yes, but he’ll take care of you,” Julia says, enunciating her words.
I groan into my palm. “I know.”
“Good. Now, what else?” she questions.
She helps talk me through some of my anxieties as best she can, but then our time is up. It’s Thomas’s turn to talk to his family, and as much as I wish I could stay on the phone with mine, it’s time.
I say goodbye to my sisters and grandma, holding back my tears the entire time. I sit in the silence for another minute, letting myself try to handle this pain of missing them, while also enjoying my time with Thomas.
After a few minutes, I stand, taking the phone with me and heading outside. Arson follows, darting across the lawn to Thomas in one of the swings by the pond.
Thomas stands, crossing the lawn to meet me in the middle. I wrap my arms around his torso, melting my body into his. “Thanks for that,” I say. “I didn’t realize how much I needed it.”
Thomas tilts my face to meet his. “I’m glad you got that time with them.”
“Now, it’s your turn,” I reply, passing him the phone as we separate. “Do you want some alone time?”
He shakes his head. “No, I think I want you there with me. It might be easier.”
“Okay,” I respond, taking his hand in mine as we head back to the house.
When we’re inside, we take the same spots as before at the kitchen table, only this time, Thomas surprises me by pulling me into his lap.
I tense for a moment until I settle into him.
He feels so warm, and I can’t help but soak up the comfort that he gives me and hope that I can provide that for him as well.
He dials the number, and whoever he’s calling picks up on the third ring. “This is Jason,” he answers.
“Jase,” Thomas breathes. “It’s Thomas.”
“Holy crap, Tommy, are you good?”
“Yeah. We’re good. Are you with anyone?”
“Yep. There’s an event at the brewery today, and everyone is here. Give me a minute and I’ll round everyone up.”
There’s a lot of rustling and conversation and a few minutes later, Jason is back. “Tommy? I’ve got everyone in here.”
A cacophony of voices breaks out across the line, all of them fighting to be the one to speak first.
“Everyone chill,” Thomas says with a laugh, his earlier nervousness softening. “Hannah and I are fine. I’m sorry I had to leave so abruptly, but we’re fine.”
“Oh thank god,” a feminine voice says. “When are you coming home?”
“I’m not sure, Mom. Hopefully, only a few more weeks, but there’s no way to know for sure. Did Josie have the baby yet?”
Andrew’s voice pops in. “Nope. She’s convinced she’s going to hold out until you get home, but there’s only two more weeks until she’s due, so she could go anytime.”
“I’m sorry. Josie, don’t worry about it. I’ll meet him as soon as I get home.” Thomas runs his hand down my thigh, like he needs my touch to anchor him right now. I lean my head into the crook of his neck.
“I don’t want you to miss it,” Josie says, sniffling. “He’s your nephew. You should be able to meet him right away with everyone else.”
“I know, and I want that too, but if I miss it, it will be okay. Take lots of pictures for me, okay?”
“We will,” Andrew agrees.
The family catches up for a few more minutes, Jason’s two daughters chiming in with things they’ve been up to this summer, until Thomas’s grandpa chimes in.
“What’s this I hear about you and Hannah being engaged?” he says, his voice gravely and filled with humor. I stiffen and lean back, trying to slide away, but Thomas’s grip tightens around my waist.
Thomas tilts his head back, taking a deep breath. I’m about to say something, tell them it’s all a joke, but Thomas clamps a hand over my mouth before I can. “Yes, we’re engaged. Right, Hannah?”
I roll my eyes at him, and he narrows his at me. When he seems convinced I won’t tell them it’s fake, he drops his palm from my mouth. “Yes, we are. It’s fast, but it makes sense for us.” The lie slides from my lips easily, and I wish I could believe it as much as he does.
“Hmm,” Gramps mumbles. “I’m happy for you two. Sounds like we have a wedding to plan when you get back. Thomas, you got that ring?”
Thomas chokes, letting out a rough cough. “Yep,” he says tightly.
He has a ring?
“Good. Then you’re set.”
“I guess so.”
The family wraps up their conversations, and a few minutes later, we’re saying goodbye and hanging up the phone. Thomas shuts the burner phone off again, sliding it across the kitchen table until it lands in the middle.
“How are you?” I ask. I purposefully avoid the subject of the ring, because it’s not like a potential family heirloom is any of my business. We aren’t really engaged. It’s going to be messy when we get home, but for now, it is what it is.
“Better. It was good to hear their voices. I wish Josie wasn’t so close to delivery, but there’s nothing I can do about it right now,” Thomas says.
I rest my palm on his chest. “You’re close with her, aren’t you?”
“I’m close with all my siblings and their partners. They’re my best friends.”
“I understand. I’m super close with Julia and Tiff too.”
“I hope you can become friends with my sisters-in-law when we get back too. They’re all great,” Thomas says, his smile growing.
“What are you smiling about?” I question, poking the dimple in his cheek. His face flushes.
“Thinking about what it will be like to have you really get to know my family.”
My heart swells and cracks painfully all at the same time.
I want to give into the fact that this can work when we get home, but how can I?
We’re living in a safe house, secluded from the entire world.
Of course, things are going to seem perfect and like a fairytale here.
But as soon as we get home, he will get sick of me, I know it.
I’m a lot to handle, and I’m surprised he isn’t sick of me already.
But that’s another day’s problem. For now, I can soak up the time that we have, and let myself experience a relationship, no matter how fake it may be.
“That will be nice,” I reply to placate him.
“I agree. They’re going to love you, Han.” He presses a kiss to my lips, and it isn’t long before the kiss turns deeper.
I shift in his lap so I can face him, and my thigh brushes against a growing bulge between his legs. Before I can second guess myself, I reach down, laying my palm over top of it and gently squeezing. Thomas moans into my mouth, and the sound is so sinful that it makes my confidence grow tenfold.
“Fuck, Hannah,” he groans. He moves a hand down to my palm to guide me over his cock again, showing me how hard to squeeze.
He moves my palm up and down the length of his hardening cock beneath his shorts, and I can’t stop the tingly feeling budding in my lower belly.
This is the sexiest thing I’ve ever done.
Thomas shifts me, tugging my hand off his length.
I whimper, wanting to be touching him again, but he pulls my legs around his waist. His fingers dig into my thighs as he stands, carrying me.
He walks us over to the couch, laying me down on my back.
Thomas pushes my legs apart with his knee, his thigh resting at the apex of my thighs, rubbing against my already soaking pussy through my clothes.
I don’t want to feel him through my clothes though, I want to feel him skin to skin.
Thomas’s lips find mine again, his hands caressing my hips, up to my breasts.
He cups my breasts through my clothes. My body is experiencing sensation overload, and I need more.
I reach for him, sliding my hands under the hem of his shirt and tugging upward.
Thomas helps, reaching behind his neck and yanking his shirt up and off of him.
He does the same with his shorts, leaving him in only his boxers. His blue eyes are dark as his gaze rakes over my still-clothed body. “Can I?” he softly asks, flicking his eyes to my shirt.
I frantically nod. His hands find my hips again, this time taking the hem of my top in between his fingers. A jolt of anxiety takes over. He’s going to see me naked.