Chapter 18
Eighteen
To say the day was turning beyond peculiar was an understatement, especially after Seth and Cantankerous went careening past Annaliese, Flick’s donkey at their heels, both men bobbing about and looking quite as if they were about to tumble to the ground, a sight that was already drawing attention from two men sitting in a wagon that was parked off the side of the road.
Those men then took to gawking at Harriet as she went trundling past them on her donkey. She sent the men a wave of her monkey paw, something that left both of them staring after her with their mouths agape.
“Have you checked to make certain your pistol’s readily accessible?
” Louisa asked as she jostled up beside Annaliese, Pierre swaying on her shoulder, the sight of the parrot leaving the two men gawking even more as Annaliese and Louisa rode past them.
“We don’t want to arrive on the scene anything less than prepared. ”
“I assure you, my pistol is within easy reach, but . . .” Annaliese frowned. “I thought you said that you didn’t think it was going to be all that difficult to rescue Norma Jean.”
Louisa waved that aside. “That was simply me channeling the attitude of my oh-so-optimistic heroine Pierre the Pirate. She’s always doling out optimism when times turn daunting, just as she doles out romantic advice whenever she feels the need.”
“Why do I get the distinct impression that you’re champing at the bit to channel your heroine again in order to lend me some of that romantic advice?”
“Because you’re obviously a very astute young lady.” Louisa smiled. “With that said, know that Pierre would take this particular moment to say that when a couple is on the brink of embracing a budding romance, care should be taken when it comes to a first kiss.”
Annaliese wrinkled her nose. “Should I ask why you’re thinking about first kisses right now?”
“Because kissing always springs to mind when a couple smiles at each other like you and Seth have been doing.” Louisa’s smile turned knowing.
“If you missed it, Seth was smiling at you as if you were a tasty bowl of ice cream he wanted to savor, and I have to say that you were smiling at him in quite the same fashion. I’d wager that the two of you were contemplating kissing just a scant few minutes ago, but now is hardly the moment for that. ”
Heat immediately took to curling up Annaliese’s neck and a ready retort was nowhere to be found because—she wasn’t surprised she’d been smiling at Seth in a way that suggested she’d been considering kissing the gentleman since, well, she had been.
Nevertheless, it wasn’t as if anyone could blame her for thoughts of kissing since his decision to name a quarrelsome donkey because he’d obviously really been listening to her views regarding animal names and that had made him more than appealing.
Granted, it had been a rather odd time to contemplate throwing herself from her donkey and kissing the man, but . . . She gave herself a small shake when a thought took that moment to spring to mind, which had her returning her full attention to Louisa.
“I find myself a tad confused right now, because if I’m not mistaken,” Annaliese began, “you’ve been determined to help Phoebe and the girls arrange a match between me and Seth.
And while you haven’t been obvious with pushing that agenda since we’ve been on the road, I find myself curious as to why you’d discourage us from sharing a kiss. ”
“I’m not discouraging anything of the sort, dear,” Louisa countered. “I’m only trying to steer your romance in a manner that will leave you with some extraordinary memories of your courtship when you and Seth are old and gray.”
“We’re not actually in the midst of a courtship.”
“Perhaps not formally, but that’s only due to your current circumstances.
” Louisa caught Annaliese’s eye. “Take it from me, a woman who reads more than a fair share of romance novels, and not simply for research purposes for my pirate novels. You’re definitely on the path to a courtship, or perhaps we should call it a courtship quest—with Seth as the treasure you’re seeking at the end of that quest.”
“I don’t remember mentioning a thing about me wanting to go on any romantic quest.”
“It was implied.”
“Because I looked like I might have been contemplating kissing your son?”
“You weren’t contemplating, you were already committed to kissing him, as he was committed to kissing you, until I interrupted.”
“And you interrupted on purpose?”
“Too right I did as I couldn’t very well sit by and let the two of you botch a first kiss.” Louisa sent Annaliese a knowing nod. “As Pierre the Pirate would say—great care should be taken when it comes to a first kiss because it’s a moment that needs to be treasured forever.”
Louisa gave her well-behaving donkey a pat.
“With that said, though, and because I’m now convinced that the two of you are romantically interested in each other—something I was growing concerned about when it almost seemed to me as if the two of you were settling into a friendship role over the past week or so—know that you may now count on me to guide you to your very own happily ever after, although we’re going to have to wait on that until we retrieve Norma Jean. ”
Before Annaliese could do more than wonder how it had come to be that Louisa seemed to be under the impression that she was going to swoop in and become Annaliese’s romantic advisor, Louisa kneed her donkey forward, but not before she sent Annaliese a cheeky wink and Pierre sent her a “Zut” before descending into cackles.
“Hey, lady!” someone called out from behind her. “I’ll give you three dollars for that bird.”
Annaliese turned and settled her attention on the two men who’d been sitting in their wagon, but who were now trundling toward her at a rapid clip.
Reining in a donkey she thought might be appropriately named Saucy, given her questionable disposition, Annaliese waited as the driver of the wagon pulled to a stop beside her, where he promptly sent a nod toward Louisa, or rather, Pierre, who was once again calling out “Zut” mixed in with a few “Get your rums” for good measure.
“Couldn’t help notice that parrot has a bad winger,” the man began.
“You probably don’t have much use for a bird that probably only flies around in circles, but I’ll tell you what.
” He reached behind him and yanked aside a tarp, revealing a rusted cage that was stuffed with birds, a chorus of varied birdsong rending the air the moment their prison was uncovered.
“You can have one of them smaller ones for free, plus the three dollars for your parrot.”
Annaliese’s lips thinned. “You’re plume hunters?”
“Darn tootin’, and me and Howard here just got back from the Keys, where we made a nice haul this time around.” He inclined his head. “Name’s Charlie, and you would be . . . ?”
“Appalled.”
Charlie gave his chin a scratch. “I ain’t never made the acquaintance of no woman by the name of Appalled before, but it’s kinda catchy. With them pleasantries out of the way, what say we strike up a deal?”
“I’m not sure there’s anything all that pleasant about this conversation, but may I assume it’s safe to say that you want my parrot because of her colorful feathers?”
“You got yourself a macaw, not just any parrot, Miss Appalled, unless it’s Mrs. Appalled.”
“It’s Miss, but—”
“Miss Appalled it is,” Charlie interrupted.
“And know that macaws are easy to sell to milliners because of them pretty feathers.” Charlie shot another glance to Pierre, who’d swiveled her head around and settled her gaze on Charlie, another “Zut” erupting out of her mouth as if she was well-aware that Charlie and Howard posed a threat to her.
“Like I pointed out, that one is damaged, so three dollars is a good price for it.”
“Pierre’s not for sale.”
“Everything’s for sale if the price is right. I bet you’ll agree to my terms if I offer you four dollars and two lorikeets.” He nodded to the cage. “Them lorikeets in there are real sweet birds, and last I saw, their feathers were fine.”
Annaliese glanced at the cage stuffed with far too many birds, their many birdsongs tinged with the sound of panic, which was perfectly understandable considering the poor things had been plucked from their island paradises and shoved into a rusty cage.
She forced a smile. “I must admit I’m partial to lorikeets, but . . .”
Before she could finish the thought, Louisa came trotting up on her donkey to join them, her eyes narrowed on Charlie.
“Did I hear you right and that you want to buy this parrot?” Louisa demanded.
“Indeed,” Charlie agreed, evidently missing the fact that Louisa was bristling with temper. “Offered four dollars and two lorikeets for it, a fair price if there ever was one since I already pointed out to Miss Appalled that the parrot ain’t worth much since it’s damaged.”
Louisa lifted her chin. “Pierre’s mending very well, thank you very much, and she’s not for sale.”
“Not for sale, not for sale,” Pierre parroted before she bobbed up and down a few times. “Naughty boys, naughty boys.”
Louisa beamed a smile. “What a great judge of character you are, Pierre.”
“Zut,” Pierre squawked.
“Bless your heart,” Louisa said. “I thought we’d turned a corner on your naughty language, but we obviously still have some work to do with that.”
“You wouldn’t have to do any work if you just sold that bird to me,” Charlie pointed out.
Louisa began to swell on the spot, her face turning an interesting shade of purple as she opened her mouth, closed it, then opened it again, although not a single word escaped her lips.