Chapter 6 #2
As Amelia rose from the couch and made a beeline for the bar, Jo wasn’t entirely sure what she had just invited in.
Had the ground just shifted beneath them?
She had touched Amelia before, but it had been nothing more than a shoulder squeeze, or a hug, or a hand held in comfort.
But this? This felt charged in a way Jo hadn’t prepared for.
It wasn’t lost on her that Amelia had kissed her cheek as though it was the most natural thing in the world.
Like she belonged here. Like maybe Jo wasn’t the only one whose world had tilted tonight.
She watched as Amelia leaned over the bar, her hair catching the golden lights above, those lips enchanting to watch as she placed their order. And then Jo caught the pendant that glinted red against her chest.
She sipped the last of her whiskey, the slow burn no match for the rush of heat dancing beneath her skin. Maybe it was the sex. Maybe it was still Lia. But maybe not.
Oh, you’ve fucked up here!
Amelia returned with two fresh glasses—wine for herself, another whiskey for Jo—and took the seat beside her again, this time sitting just a little closer than before.
Their knees brushed, but Amelia didn’t move away.
“I hope this one’s strong enough,” she said, handing Jo the glass with a small smile. “You looked like you needed it.”
“I do,” Jo murmured as she took it from Amelia. “Thanks.”
They both drank in silence, the music around them low and rhythmic, the pulse of the place still beating steadily even as the night crept on.
The other women nearby were talking in clusters, some flirting and laughing, others making their way towards the various rooms, or returning from them with contented, slightly dazed expressions.
Jo knew her own face probably looked similar.
Still a little dreamy. Still very overwhelmed.
She knew Amelia was studying her. She could feel those eyes searching for something.
“You’re quiet,” Amelia said.
“I’m just thinking.”
“About Lia?”
Jo nodded, staring at the closed door of the dark room she’d left some thirty minutes ago now. “She makes me feel like…someone new. Not just sexy. Not just desired. But like I’m allowed to want things again. Things I thought I’d locked away.”
Amelia turned slightly towards her, cradling her wine glass in one hand, the other resting on her knee. “Then I’m glad she’s part of your story, even if it’s only a chapter.”
That surprised Jo. The one thing she hadn’t expected was for Callum’s mum to be open to the idea of Jo getting her kicks with strangers.
It just didn’t seem like who Amelia was.
But then again, Jo had only ever known her as Callum’s mum.
It had only been a recent development—a few months at best—that they’d crossed the line into a full-blown friendship. “You really mean that?”
Amelia regarded her with a gentle smile. “Of course I do. Watching you sit in the shadows of your life for the last several months…it’s been hard.”
Jo looked down into her drink. “You’ve seen me like that?”
“Every time you visit.”
A lump rose in Jo’s throat. She didn’t know what to say to that, so she sipped her drink instead.
Her hand trembled slightly as she set the glass back down on the table.
“I’m okay. I’ve been okay.” That wasn’t quite the truth, Callum had stripped away who Jo was the moment he left her, but she hated feeling so vulnerable around Amelia.
She didn’t want to come across that way.
The woman was drop-dead gorgeous, for the love of God. “Life moves on, right?”
Amelia reached out and placed her hand over Jo’s. Just for a second. Just long enough to remind her that she was here, that she saw her…even when Jo had been lost. “I think maybe you’re not meant to be in the shadows, Jo.”
“Please don’t.” Jo laughed. “I might start crying and ruin my reputation.”
Amelia slowly drew her hand away, but it didn’t move far. “Wouldn’t be the worst thing.”
Jo shifted and faced her fully. “Why are you really here tonight?”
“Because I wanted to be.” Amelia didn’t look away. No, that stare pinned Jo in place.
“Because I mentioned it once? Or because you were already planning on it?”
Amelia hesitated and eventually cleared her throat. “A little of both. I wasn’t sure if I’d actually walk in…until I saw you sitting here.”
Jo exhaled slowly. She wasn’t quite sure what to make of that comment. “And now that you’ve seen me?”
Amelia’s voice dropped lower. “Now I don’t want to leave.”
Jo swallowed. Her thoughts were a mess between flashes of Lia’s hands on her body, Amelia’s lips on her cheek…
and the very look she was giving her now.
She couldn’t sort Lia from Amelia. She couldn’t tell if she was in over her head or exactly where she was meant to be in this moment.
And the silence that had settled between them wasn’t helping either.
Finally, Amelia broke it. “Don’t worry. I’m not sitting here expecting a thing from you. We don’t even have to talk about anything if it’s too much. I just…I like being here with you. Even like this.”
Jo wrinkled her nose. “Even with my post-orgasm haze and sweaty thighs?”
“Especially with your post-orgasm haze and sweaty thighs.”
Jo laughed, almost choking on it as she glanced around the room. “You’re terrible.”
“I know.” Amelia grinned.
Jo turned back to her glass. It was clear there was a connection between them—one Jo was now beginning to realise had existed prior to this evening.
She side-glanced at Amelia, aware that this question could change everything.
“Do you ever wonder if things would have been different…were you not Callum’s mum? ”
Amelia’s smile faded slowly. “All the time.”
And then Jo felt it. That same twist in her gut that had once belonged to confusion whenever she thought about Amelia. To grief at the idea of never seeing her again, once Callum had cut ties with Jo. To the longing she had buried but never quite let go of.
“I don’t know what any of this means,” Jo admitted, her voice barely audible. “Or what the new me is capable of.”
“You don’t have to,” Amelia said softly. “You just have to let it exist.”
Jo relaxed. Maybe she didn’t need to have all the answers tonight. Maybe she could sit here, a little drunk and a little overwhelmed, next to someone who knew her too well…and just be happy. Maybe, for once, Jo could spend the evening not in her own head.
She leaned back, her thigh pressed to Amelia’s. For the first time in a long time, Jo didn’t feel broken.
She felt alive.