BAY
I sit at the kitchen table and watch Alex. He looks radiant, his cheeks warm with color, his hair in a charming mess. He hums under his breath one of my songs, while he makes us soft-boiled eggs with a tomato salad and toast with cheese.
From time to time he glances at me, those brief, flirtatious looks I remember from when we were in high school, carefree and bright.
But the scent hanging in the air carries a new note and I wonder how to tell him about it, my fingers tapping lightly on the tabletop in the rhythm of the song that has been looping in my head and demanding to get out.
What surprises me is that yesterday’s events didn’t shake Alex nearly as much as I expected, neither the kidnapping nor his unexpected transformation into a revenant seem to have left a deeper trauma.
I have the sense that the Bond between True Mates softens some of the shock and disperses it along the energetic thread that connects us.
Besides, the feeling of strength definitely helps.
Alex discovered how effective and powerful his unusual ability can be, and even though many people might find it frightening or unsettling, he has had time to come to terms with the idea since Oswald’s death.
Now he simply accepts it along with the fact that it comes with even more perks.
I reached that state through years of training and by gaining experience thanks to Ennio.
Alex only now has the chance to taste what it feels like not to see himself as a victim all the time but to find himself on the winning side.
He’s such a determined and capable person!
I can only admire him as the sole architect of our relationship rebirth.
Alex sets a plate in front of me and his face lights up with a wide smile.
"Enjoy," he says and sits down at the table.
"Thank you, Alex. All those years living alone had me relying on meal prep and endless takeout. The only breakfasts someone else ever made for me were at home…"
Alex studies me for a moment.
"I wonder what your dad will say when he finds out."
"There will be two good bits of news for him," I say carefully, tilting my head.
"Oh? And what’s the second one? I have so many candidates in mind." Alex giggles.
I can’t get enough of the sight of him. He is joyful again, bright, almost as if his natural self is finally rising to the surface after years of being frozen.
"It’s very subtle for now, but I can smell something in the air…"
"My Allure? You stopped taking suppressants, didn’t you?"
"That’s not it. I took one last night so the effect is definitely still there. I mean another scent."
Alex goes still, his eyes widening.
"What do you mean?"
"I think you’re pregnant."
A deep silence falls.
I watch him closely. I know that when we were in high school Alex dreamed of having a family, but so many years have passed and things could have changed.
"Really?"
"Yes."
"I’m gonna be a dad?"
"If you choose to be."
Alex closes his eyes and lets out a deep breath.
"It happened in the forest, didn’t it? When I tried to tear off your mask and you jerked back, is that when the condom slipped a bit?"
"I think so. Alex—"
"I didn’t have sex with anyone else, so it had to happen then."
Alex still wears a strange expression as his fingers slide gently over his lower belly and then he whispers, "Pregnant with my stalker…" with this odd little smile.
"Hey! Pregnant with me. I was him, the whole time."
"It was such a crazy experience… Why would you even decide to wear a mask?"
"Because I thought there was no chance for us, Alex, and I hoped that if I stalked you, staying anonymous, you would eventually let yourself find a new man, create a family, be happy, and forget us, as just a high school crush."
Alex scoffs sharply, almost angrily. He gets up so fast it makes me straighten up.
"You were never a high school crush! Never! You were the… love of my life, Bay! And you are."
Our eyes lock.
Alex slides his hand over his belly.
"You really feel it? Our child is growing there?"
"Yes. There’s a note of vanilla in the air typical for pregnancy."
He shuts his eyes.
"It doesn’t feel real. Sometimes I feel like we’re living inside a strange dream that only recently, yesterday, stopped being a nightmare. And is it even the end of it? I’m scared, Bay… scared for the child’s safety. There is so much death and danger around us."
For a moment I stare at the floor. I tried so hard to make him feel safe all these years, but in some ways I still failed.
Alex lived in stress and anxiety and it took its toll.
The sad part is, it’s not like it was unwarranted in his case.
His life really was often endangered. I reach for his small hand, wrap my fingers around it, and pull him closer.
My words are soft, perhaps not as full of conviction as I wish. "Life is stronger than death, and right now a new life is beginning inside you."
Alex drops his wet amethyst eyes to me and searches my face. He probably senses my hesitance.
"Do you even want to have a child with me?"
The answer to this is so easy.
"Oh, Alex. There is nothing I want more! I’m from a big family myself, I always wanted to have kids.
A family with you, a life with you, it would be a dream come true.
But I know we are both emerging from something like a prolonged nightmare, only freshly closing the chapter where we lost each other.
So I won’t pressure you into keeping the baby. "
Alex’s eyes widen. "You’re too picture-perfect of a boyfriend, do you know it?
First, you don’t mind I fuck with others if that would mean my happiness.
Then you would accept me ending the pregnancy?
There is something like… too by-the-book perfect, Bay!
Can’t you see what the problem is? I don’t fucking want it!
I want you to forbid me things! To say no!
To be determined! That we will do it! We will keep him and raise him!
Protect him together! Don’t you dare even consider alternatives! I want you to demand it—"
I stand up and walk toward the window, and Alex interrupts in the middle of the sentence.
A bitter feeling swells in me, flooding me.
"Would you truly be mine if I just… took you."
Alex stares at me, blinking; he obviously doesn’t understand how this is related to what he said.
"Call me weak, not alpha enough. But I would rather die for you than force my will upon you."
Alex lets out a quiet breath, sounding a bit like a sob.
"Force it!"
Now I blink, not understanding.
"Fight for what you want, Bay! I did! And now we can be together! Your turn. Fight for the world where our child can be safe. Create this reality for us, Bay!"
I swear under my breath, then take two steps and pull him toward myself by his shoulders.
"All I can promise you is that even if the world threatens to collapse around us every single day, I will do everything I can to keep it from burying us alive.
But you need to understand one thing that sets us apart.
For all those years, hope was all you had.
I had nothing to hope for. I need to catch up, Alex. "
Alex slowly raises his hand and touches my face, his lips trembling, his eyes wet.
"Okay. So we take it step by step. We fight together, we build a life together, brick by brick, creating peaceful days. I choose to believe they will come. Do you?"
I squeeze my eyes shut as a vague shadow slides across my vision.
"Not today; one more thing is coming."
He blinks. "What?"
"But I hope it’s the last. This time, I’m on the hope train too," I say with a small, sad smile and…
Just then, there is a knock at the door.
Alex freezes at once, his face turning pale. I can see the stress ignite inside him.
Silently I turn my head toward the sound and walk to the door. Whatever this is, I need to face it.
I check the video intercom and see a man I don’t recognize.
Normally, I’d just open the door, but this time I answer through the speaker,
"Yes?"
"Good morning, I’m Detective Arnold from—"
I release the button and turn to Alex.
He stares at me, so pale I fear he might faint. His hands tremble, his lips nearly blue. I can almost feel it, running through the energetic threads connecting us in our TM Bond: a wave of panic rising within him.
I walk up to him and cup his face in my hands.
"Now, I fight. You wanted me to push for things I want. So now’s the time to test it," I speak in a lowered voice.
He nods.
"Do it. Do the right thing!"
"This is very important, Alex. You need to stay completely calm and not give anything away. Calm, you hear me? Calm and relaxed. Calm and composed."
"What if they have evidence—"
"Stop. Focus. All is under control."
I narrow my eyes on his face, zeroing in on his pupils.
"Relax, Alex," I whisper so quietly he has to really listen to even hear me.
My energy influences him, I can sense it.
"Think clearly. We’re True Mates. We can’t be separated, the law protects us. That gives us an entirely new angle for defense," I say, keeping a razor-sharp focus on him and… I can sense the steady shift in him, as if my reassurance is enough.
He nods and whispers,
"Okay. I’ll try to act normal."
I nod back and walk to the door and open it.
The man has dark hair, looks around forty, well built, exactly the type who fits law enforcement, dressed in a suit, his face tanned. We look each other in the eyes for a moment.
"Hello. May I come in?"
"What is this about, Detective?" I ask, keeping my voice even as I raise my brows slightly.
Arnold pauses, tilting his head.
"We’ll see once everything is explained."
"That sounds cryptic."
"It is."
"I respect law enforcement, so I won’t refuse a conversation," I say with a friendly smile and gesture for him to enter.