Chapter Seven
November 2014, Canterbury, Kent, England
‘Morning Chris.’ Molly smiled at him. She was feeling proud of herself. Yes, her hangover had wiped out most of yesterday, but she had got up this morning and onto the early train. However, she had just come face to face with Chris, and she cringed as she remembered kissing his cheek and holding his hand on Saturday night. This was why she didn’t drink. She always ended up embarrassing herself.
‘Morning, Molly,’ he said, smiling back at her.
They got onto the train and sat down next to each other.
‘I’m so sorry if I embarrassed you at the weekend.’ She was sure he was thinking about it, but he was too polite to say anything. ‘I hadn’t drunk that much in such a long time.’
‘I’m beautiful, am I?’ He raised his eyebrow.
She wasn’t afraid. She was going to own it. ‘You are beautiful. You’re not just handsome, you’re kind, and caring. Beautiful.’
‘Well, that’s a glowing review.’ His cheeks flushed, and he rubbed the back of his neck. ‘You’re all of those things too, you know.’
‘I am?’ she squeaked. Now she was caught off guard. She could feel her own cheeks flushing. ‘That’s so sweet. I… I had a bit too much to drink and I was worried I’d embarrassed you, or me, or both of us.’ She was rambling, but she couldn’t stop herself.
‘You didn’t embarrass anyone,’ he replied. ‘I had a great night.’ He paused. ‘So did Scott. He can’t stop talking about your sister.’
‘Saskia’s the same,’ she said, lowering her voice. ‘I knew from the minute they met that she’d fallen for him. She might be an actress, but she’s so obvious.’
He laughed. ‘So is Scott. You always know what he’s thinking. He’s not like you.’
‘What do you mean?’ she asked.
‘You’re like an onion. There are so many layers. I feel like I’ve only seen a few of them.’ He raised his eyebrow.
‘Same.’ She smiled. ‘You didn’t tell me you were a DJ.’
He shrugged. ‘I don’t tell many people. Alex is also super private about it. What did you think of our set?’
‘I loved it,’ she replied. ‘I’ve already downloaded the playlist from his website. I listen to music all the time, and my playlists are so varied.’
‘Which one do you listen to the most?’ he asked.
She laughed. ‘Don’t judge me, but it’s this one.’ Scrolling through her phone, she pulled up her favourite playlist. ‘Fall Out Boy, Green Day, Panic at the Disco, I love them all so much.’
His eyes widened. ‘I would not have guessed that at all. You are a mystery.’
She handed him an earbud. ‘Let me drag you away from the drum and bass, over to the dark side.’
‘I’d let you lead me to the dark side any day, Molly,’ he replied, raising his eyebrow.
Her heart pounding, she held his gaze. The effect he had on her was mesmerising. She couldn’t tear herself away from him. But she had to. He put the earbud in his ear, still holding her gaze and she smiled.
‘Let me know what you think. I won’t be offended if you hate it,’ she said, forcing herself to break eye contact with him. She pulled her book out of her bag and opened it. She was playing it safe today, with a travel book by one of her favourite explorers. Reading smut with him sat next to her was too dangerous a game.
‘So far so good,’ he said as the first song started playing. He got out his own book, and Molly breathed a sigh of relief. She could immerse herself in her book and try to ignore the warm, contented feeling that washed over her as his arm pressed up against hers.
When the train arrived in London, Molly stuck closely to Chris’s side as they walked across the concourse together.
‘Can I walk you to your office?’ he asked. ‘Mine is just around the corner, and I figured you might want some company.’
She wondered what expression was on her traitorous face. She’d been aiming for brave, steely determination, but in reality, she was probably displaying wide-eyed fear.
‘Of course.’ She nodded. ‘I’d like that.’
When they reached her building, he leant towards her, and she kissed him on the cheek, before jumping back in horror as his cheeks coloured. ‘I’m so sorry, I thought we were cheek kissing.’
He pulled a piece of fluff from her hair. ‘I was just going to grab this. Don’t worry about it, I don’t mind.’ He smiled.
She shook her head. ‘My dad’s French. I’m so used to kissing on the cheek. It just comes naturally to me.’
‘You didn’t mention that.’ He raised his eyebrow.
Yes, and there’s a very good reason for that, she thought to herself.
‘Ah well, like you said, many layers.’ She pushed open the glass door of her building, then turned back to Chris. ‘Au revoir, mon ami.’
***
That evening, Molly unlocked her front door and threw her keys onto the table in the hall. She pulled off her boots and coat and walked into the living room. Saskia was stretched out on the sofa watching a film.
‘What’s up, Mole?’ Saskia frowned at her. ‘I thought you’d be buzzing; you were up and out on the early train. I’m so proud of you.’
‘When I got to London, it felt great.’ She slumped onto the sofa next to Saskia. ‘Then I had a shit journey back and it rattled me a bit.’
‘What happened?’ Saskia narrowed her eyes.
Molly debated lying to her sister or at least concealing some of the truth but decided against it. Saskia would know. ‘I missed my usual train, and therefore, Chris. The only seat was in a group of four, with three men who leered at me and made obscene comments about my dress. It was peeking out of my coat, and they were amused by the cat print.’
‘Ugh. What arseholes. Did you report them?’ Saskia asked.
‘To who? And what would anyone do about it?’ Molly sighed. ‘I didn’t let them get to me. I just put my earbuds in and ignored them.’
‘You were so brave today. I’m proud of you,’ Saskia said . ‘A few weeks ago that would have had you in tears. How do you feel now? I’ve got a date tonight, but if you need me to stay in, then I will.’
Molly shook her head. She needed Saskia to stop being so nice. She was too close to tears. ‘No, it’s fine. I’m going to see Colette. I’ll talk to her about it.’
‘Are you sure?’ Saskia frowned. ‘I can totally postpone.’
‘No, I promise you, I’m fine.’ Molly smiled. ‘Are you excited about seeing Scott again?’
‘I am. He intrigues me.’ Saskia grinned. ‘Most of the time guys feed me cheesy lines and expect me to fall at their feet. He tried that and I called him out on it straight away. He liked that, and I like him. Can you come and help me choose an outfit?’
‘Sure.’ Molly pulled herself to her feet and followed Saskia to her chaotic bedroom.
When Saskia finally left the house, Molly was exhausted. Saskia had emptied most of her wardrobe onto her bed to find an outfit for her date, then almost talked herself out of going before eventually getting dressed and leaving the house in a taxi. Having waved goodbye to her at the door, Molly spotted Saskia’s house keys on the table in the hall. She shook her head and sent her sister a text to let her know that she had forgotten them.
As she went to stuff her phone back into her pocket, it rang. She answered it and Mark’s handsome face filled the screen of her phone.
‘Hey. How are you?’ he asked.
She could see his hotel room in the background, and the plush white bedding on the bed he was lying on.
‘I’m good. Work’s fine, I’m getting braver with the commute, and I went out with the girls for Halloween.’ She giggled. ‘I’m still recovering actually.’
‘I knew you’d bounce back. You’re so strong.’ He smiled at her.
‘I don’t know, it’s still tough...’
‘I’ll be back on Friday,’ he said, interrupting her. ‘You’re still coming to stay for the weekend, right?’
‘Of course,’ she replied. ‘Can’t wait.’
‘Me neither,’ he said quickly. ‘I’ve got to go. I’ve got dinner with clients tonight. See you on Friday. Love you.’
‘Love you,’ she replied, hanging up and already looking forward to the weekend.
They would go out and eat the kind of food she wouldn’t dream of cooking at home, then when they got back to his apartment, he would show her with his actions, not his words, how much he had missed her.
After eating some leftover lasagne, she put a film on and wrapped a blanket tightly around her. Saskia had got a fire going in the living room before she went out, so the room was warm and cosy, and as she tried to concentrate on the film, she felt her eyes closing.
Molly’s eyes shot open, a loud knocking sound disturbing her from her sleep. Her heart started pounding.
‘Molly! Are you there?’
A shout came from outside the house. She breathed a sigh of relief. It was Saskia.
‘I’m coming, hold on.’ She pulled herself to her feet and walked to the door, grabbing her keys, and unlocking it.
‘I’ve been out here for ages!’ Saskia’s eyes were fiery, and she had her hands on her hips.
‘I’m so sorry,’ Molly said. ‘I locked the door after you left and then I fell asleep. How did the date go?’
‘Mmm.’ Saskia closed her eyes. ‘He’s the best.’
Molly laughed. ‘Are you going to elaborate?’
‘We went to Forno and had pizzas and frozen margaritas. He didn’t try any cheesy lines and he kept his hands to himself. Who would have thought that the tattooed, gorgeous barman would be a gentleman?’ She shrugged.
‘Oh I had a feeling he would be.’ Molly beamed at Saskia. ‘I’m so happy for you.’ She remembered the heady rush of lust and excitement that came with the start of a new relationship. She’d felt the same way about Mark.
‘He walked me back to the taxi rank and he’s asked me to see him again.’ Saskia paused. ‘That’s the tricky part. I want to see him too, but I’m waiting for a call back from an audition and if I get it, I won’t be in the city much longer.’
Molly’s eyebrows shot up. ‘What’s the job? And where is it?’ She started to feel anxious.
Saskia wrinkled her nose. ‘It would be in London, and I’d have to go up there for at least a month. That’s all I’m saying.’
‘London?’ Molly’s voice came out higher than she’d intended it to. She tried to keep her tone, and her face neutral as she spoke. ‘That’s incredible. I’ll wait to hear more when you want to tell me, and I’ll keep everything crossed for you.’
‘Thank you,’ Saskia replied. ‘I know you’ve always got my back, and I love you for it.’
‘I love you too.’ Molly smiled.
She was happy for her sister, but there was a sadness creeping over her. The thought that Saskia might leave her, and not come back. She pushed it to the back of her mind, determined not to let her true feelings show.
***
The following morning, Chris was making a cup of tea when Scott walked into the kitchen.
‘Morning, mate.’ Scott grinned at Chris.
‘I’m guessing last night went well.’ Chris raised an eyebrow. He slid the mug over to Scott, got another one out of the cupboard and made himself another cup of tea.
They took their mugs over to the bench in the dining room and sat opposite each other.
‘Are you going to tell me about it?’ Chris took a sip of his tea.
Scott nodded. ‘It was good. We really clicked.’ He held up his hands as Chris raised his eyebrow at him. ‘Not like that. I don’t do one night stands anymore. We just talked. No bullshit. Just two people actually talking to each other. She loved the pizza and the cocktails. Obviously, they weren’t as good as mine.’ He smiled. ‘I kissed her and it was mind-blowing. She’s…something else.’
‘Happy for you, mate.’ Chris put his mug down. He was happy for Scott, but at the same time, he felt jealous. Scott had gone for it with Saskia, and he was still working up the courage to ask Molly out.
‘Thanks. It just went too fast.’ Scott smiled. ‘She doesn’t stop talking. I think I heard her whole life story last night. I’m seeing her tomorrow night, so I’ll get part two.’
Chris laughed. Saskia was such a contrast to Molly, whose layers he was still unpeeling.
‘Did you know that their mum died three years ago?’ Scott asked. ‘That’s got to be so hard. I mean, I didn’t even know my mum and I still get upset thinking about her. Saskia said that Molly kind of took over from her mum when she died and looks after her.’ He paused. ‘Like you do with me.’
‘I didn’t know that,’ Chris said. ‘She doesn’t talk about her parents. Did you tell her about your parents?’
‘No,’ Scott replied. ‘I don’t think it’s first date conversation material. I need to figure out if it’s going anywhere before I casually drop the fact that my alcoholic dad used to hit me and I ran away from home when I was five.’ He paused. ‘Does Molly know?’
Chris took a sip of his tea. ‘She knows your home situation was rough, and that Mum adopted you. I didn’t tell her the whole story. It’s not my story to tell.’
‘I wish it wasn’t my story,’ Scott said. ‘I didn’t tell her much about me at all. She obviously knows I’m your younger brother and that we live together.’ He smirked at Chris’s raised eyebrow.‘I know it’s only a few months, but it still counts.’ He paused. ‘It’s late. Aren’t you usually leaving by now?’
‘I’m not going into work today. I’ve got a doctor’s appointment at ten.’ Chris bit his lip.
‘The migraines?’ Scott frowned.
‘Yeah, I’m struggling to keep on top of them.’ Chris ran his hand through his hair. ‘They’ve been getting worse over the last few weeks, and last night’s one was bad. I’ve barely slept.’
‘I don’t start until midday. You want me to come with you?’ Scott finished his tea and took his mug over to the sink.
‘No, but I appreciate the offer.’ Chris finished his tea. ‘Do you want some breakfast? My painkillers have just kicked in.’
‘No. You sit there. I’ll do it.’ Scott walked over to the fridge and opened it. ‘As I said to you the other night, you’ve got to stop thinking about everyone else all the time. Let someone be there for you.’ He pulled out a box of eggs. ‘Scrambled eggs on toast?’
‘That would be great.’ Chris smiled at Scott.
***
On Friday morning Molly lugged her scarlet red suitcase down the stairs and stuck it into the hall, hoping that she could get away with eating her breakfast and sneaking out of the door before Saskia woke up. Saskia wasn’t the best in the mornings but was even worse when Molly was going to see Mark. She made herself a bowl of granola, fruit and yoghurt and took it into the dining room, thinking about the weekend ahead with Mark. She’d packed a couple of dresses and pairs of heels, as well as some very revealing underwear.
After almost three weeks apart, she was ready to reconnect with him. She knew how the weekend would go. There would be drinks at a fancy bar, dinner at an expensive restaurant, and then he would take her back to his apartment and show her how pleased he was to see her. The only thing that was missing was an emotional connection, but she hadn’t stopped hoping for one, although he seemed happy with the relationship as it was, and she didn’t want to cause an argument. She had Saskia and Liz to have deep and meaningful conversations with. Mark was just for fun.
Knowing that Saskia had a long shift at the restaurant ahead of her, Molly made her a granola bowl and left it in the fridge, before checking her watch and realising she needed to leave. She’d just put her coat on when Saskia came down the stairs in her pyjamas.
‘You’re off early.’ Saskia spotted the suitcase next to Molly and rolled her eyes. ‘Oh yes, moron Mark has allowed you to go and spend the weekend with him in his box of glass in London. How delightful.’
Molly didn’t bother arguing with Saskia. She wasn’t going to get anywhere. ‘I’ll be back on Monday evening.’ She gave Saskia a cheerful smile. ‘Enjoy your date with Scott tomorrow night.’
‘I will.’ Saskia ran her hands through her hair. ‘Have a good weekend too.’ She ambled over and gave Molly a hug. ‘I”m sorry. I’ll try and keep my feelings about Mark to myself.’
‘Maybe just tone it down a little?’ Molly sighed. ‘I hate that you two don’t get on.’
‘Sorry, Mole.’ Saskia shrugged. ‘I can’t help how I feel. He’s not good enough for you.’
Molly’s eyes flicked to the clock on the wall. ‘We’ll have to carry this on another time. I’m going to miss my train.’
Saskia huffed and put her slippers on, picking up Molly’s suitcase and following her out of the door. She put the suitcase on the pavement and gave her a hug. ‘See you on Monday.’
‘Keep me posted on tomorrow night.’ Molly kissed Saskia’s cheek. ‘Be safe.’
‘Always. Love you,’ Saskia replied.
Molly opened the door of the waiting taxi and put her suitcase into it. ‘Love you too. Go inside, you’ll freeze out here.’ She climbed into the back of the taxi and waved at Saskia as the driver pulled away.
On the train, Molly struggled to concentrate on her book. She hadn’t seen Chris all week and it worried her. She should be thinking about Mark, but Chris was comforting, and strangely familiar. These were all things that she couldn’t tell anyone else, especially Liz and Saskia and definitely not Mark.
Mark was the only thing in her life that had been constant, and stable, but a horrible nagging feeling that maybe he wasn’t the best partner for her lurked in the pit of her stomach. Maybe dates in fancy restaurants and cocktails in swanky bars weren’t enough to keep them together. Pushing that thought to the back of her mind, she hurried off the train.
‘Ooh, someone’s off for a nice weekend.’ Sue raised her eyebrow as Molly walked up to the reception desk.
‘Morning, Sue. I’m staying at Mark’s this weekend,’ Molly said, adjusting her bag on her shoulder.
Sue raised an eyebrow. ‘Very nice, what have you got planned?’
‘No idea, he likes to surprise me.’ Molly laughed. She thought it would be a relaxed laugh, but it shot out as a hideous cackle that echoed around the huge lobby.
Sue’s eyebrows shot up. ‘I’ve not heard you make that sound before.’
Molly shook her head. ‘I’m sorry. It usually only comes out when I’m nervous.’
‘Are you nervous?’ Sue frowned at Molly. ‘Haven’t you two been together for a while?’
‘Oh yes. We’ve been together for four years. I’m definitely not nervous.’ Molly gripped the handle of her suitcase. She was sure that her guilty secret was written across her face. I’m cheating on my boyfriend in my head with the guy from the train.
‘Right.’ Sue’s frown dissipated and she smoothed down her blouse. ‘Hope you have a wonderful weekend together, love.’
‘Thank you, you too,’ Molly said, hurriedly and she walked away, she felt her cheeks burning. Why did she feel so guilty when she hadn’t done anything wrong? She wheeled her case into the lift and when she got into her office, she stashed it under her desk, put on her cerise slippers and opened her inbox.
***
Chris had caught an earlier train this morning, desperate to get in and catch up on the work that he’d missed over the last few days. The new medication that the doctor had given him for his migraines had worked, but he had spent the last few days asleep on the sofa, catching up for the previous two weeks, where he had barely slept. He’d come back in to catch up on the work he’d missed, but he now regretted going in on a Friday. It was absolute chaos, and his phone hadn’t stopped ringing. He hung up one call, and another came in immediately.
‘Chris, mate, I need you to come and sort out my computer, it won’t do anything, and I have client meetings all afternoon.’
‘Sure, Bradley, I’ll be right there.’ He sighed and locked his office, then walked to the canteen.
Bradley would need a coffee, and he wanted one too, even though it would have to be decaf as per his doctor’s orders. After collecting their drinks, he walked to the other side of the building, where Bradley’s office was. He and Bradley had started at the same time, and although Bradley’s role was senior to his – as the sales development manager he was part of the senior management team – he and Chris had bonded quickly. He knocked cautiously on Bradley’s door.
‘Come in,’ a voice called from inside the office.
‘Hello, mate.’ Chris smiled at Bradley, who was standing behind his desk, his brow furrowed. ‘I’ve got you a coffee. You can drink this and have a walk around the block while I try and work out what’s going on.’
‘You’re a diamond,’ Bradley replied, running a hand through his sandy hair. ‘I can’t figure it out, I can’t use any of the CRMs, I can’t log into my account.’ He shook his head. ‘I don’t know what’s going on.’
Chris set the coffees down on the desk. ‘I’ll take a look, while you get a change of scenery.’
‘Thanks, mate.’ Bradley nodded to Chris, pulled his jacket on, and left the office.
Chris sat down at the desk and restarted the computer. It was a joke, the “have you turned it off and on again” response to any IT queries, but a lot of times it worked.
By the time Bradley returned he was much calmer and Chris had fixed the problem. He knew that the way to handle his colleagues was to defuse the situation, provide a distraction and then slip in to solve the problem.
‘You’ve saved my life.’ Bradley clapped Chris on the back. ‘I just don’t understand these things.’
‘It’s OK.’ Chris stood up. ‘Most people don’t. Sometimes I don’t.’
‘Are you alright? I’ve not seen you for a few days.’ Bradley sat back down at his desk; his brow still furrowed.
‘I’m good.’ Chris leaned against the wall. ‘I uh… I’ve had a few migraines, and I just needed a rest. I hadn’t been sleeping that well. I got some new medication and it’s sorted me out.’
‘Oh, mate, I’m so sorry. I had no idea. That must be so shit. Listen, you have to look after yourself. Especially in these kind of places. This job, this city, it’ll eat you alive if you let it. If things get bad again, make sure you’re putting yourself first.’
Chris nodded. He’d only had two days off, but he had felt like he was letting everyone down.
‘I mean it. We can manage without you. Just.’ Bradley laughed. ‘You always put everyone else first, and I admire that. I’m a selfish bastard most of the time, but you’ve got a heart of gold. I’m gonna keep an eye on you.’
‘Thanks.’ Chris smiled. ‘I appreciate that.’
‘I got you.’ Bradley smiled back at him. ‘Do you want to go for a beer later?’
‘Sounds good,’ Chris replied. ‘Give me a shout when you’re done.’ He looked at his watch and sighed. ‘I’ll be here until at least six.’